You can sift through the racc list archive
https://lists.eyrie.org/pipermail/racc/
or you can try google groups racc for the whole issue of LNH vII #50.

And this is the conclusion of the Big Mega Multi-Writer Issue of LNH vII #50.
There were Eight LNH Writers involved in the writing of this and they
are as follow: Jeanne Morningstar, Rob Rogers, Scott Eiler,
Dave Van Domelen, Arthur Spitzer (me), Drew Nilium, Martin Phipps, and
Saxon Brenton.

And we reach the conclusion (I mean, sure, I could probably split this into
two more issues, but I'm not going to do that). We've got tons of Dorfs and
LNH'rs turning into Dorfs and Irony Men having Identity Crises. But is there
something else this story could use? Perhaps something long forgotten from
like the beginning of the story? Something that could return? Like maybe a
-- GIGANTIC HELPING OF TACO SALAD CHEESECAKE!!!!? What? You don't want that!?
Well, too bad, bub, because that's what you're going to get!

And now...

_
| | Classic
| | | | ____ ____ _ ____ ___
| |__ | [] | | [] | | | | [] | | _ \

|____| \__] \__ | |_| \__/ |_|\_\
||
|_| OF NET.HEROES

ADVENTURES #225

==================== LNH vII #50 The Conclusion
====================

From: Andrew Perron pwerdna at gmail.com
Date: Sun Nov 2 16:20:29 PST 2014

--LNH-- --LNH-- --LNH--

The elevator went ding! The business end of Master Blaster's BIGGUN
poked out, followed by the man himself. Irony Man II came after,
carrying the prone form of Bad Judgment Boy, along with Horrible Name
Lad, You're-Not-Hitting-Me-Hard-Enough Lad, and Anal-Retentive Archive
Kid II.

"Horrible Name Lad, take Bad Judgment Boy to the infirmary," said
Irony Man.

"Why me?"

"Because he will be excited to hear any new name you come up with
after he regains consciousness."

"Ooooh!" He ran off pushing a stretcher.

"Have we done that gag already?" asked YNHMHELad.

"It matters not," said Irony Man. "We must find Kid Kirby and tender
to him the antidote to the Dorf virus."

--LNH-- --LNH-- --LNH--

"Hmmm," said Doctor Stomper. "I feel as if I've forgotten
something."

--LNH-- --LNH-- --LNH--

They made their way down the corridors towards the cosmic lab.
Master Blaster shook his head. "So why am I on the team with the
delivery boys when I could be blasting Dorfs?"

"Danger is yet afoot," said Irony Man. "The Dorfish virus has
spread, and not one is safe. Wherever we go, we may run into--"

A groan issued into the corridor.

"Who--" YNHMHELad spun in place. "Where's that coming from?"

ARAK frowned. "Something is making my right eye water." He turned,
slowly, staring forward and concentrating on the edge of vision, walking
at an angle and groping at the wall until his hand came in contact with
a doorframe. "Got you!"

"A perception filter -- several, more than likely," said Irony Man,
who opened the door and stepped within.

"What are you guys talking about?" said Master Blaster, facing the
opposite direction. ARAK sighed and guided him into the room.

The groans were coming from a suit of bulky, Gothic armor, covered
with spiked protrusions, hooks, flying buttresses and more skulls and
chains than Todd McFarlane could draw in a weekend. The helmet was
missing, and the face underneath was Dorfian, but familiar...

YNHMHELad gasped. "That looks like... Toony! Irony Man must have
been Dorfized!"

"Yes," said Irony Man (that is, Irony Man II, the one we've been
following in this scene). "It appears as if there was a struggle."

Master Blaster said, "Musta been when he Dorfed out -- but why
didn't they use the cure?"

"Possibly..." ARAK stroked his orcish chin. "Possibly, his Dorfified
armor prevented them from using it. So they had to leave him here."

"I may be able to awaken him, then talk him down," said Irony Man.
"But it would require solitude."

"Oh?" Anal-Rententive Archive Kid raised an eyebrow.

"He is my Secret Keeper."

"Ah!" ARAK nodded, YNHMHELad's face lit with understanding, and
Master Blaster grumbled. The Mysterious Secret and the Secret Keeper
were ancient net.hero traditions passed down through Ages past. They
could not be contravened, unless you thought you were Alan Moore or
something. The three heroes filed out, leaving the Irony Men alone.

Irony Man held out a hand and sent an electric pulse into the
other's suit of armor for precisely one point three six seconds. "Reg
Hfffgrktt, awaken."

The great nostrils snorted, and the Dorf who had pretended at Toony
Stark's form awoke. Its eyes fixed on the armor in front of it. "You!"
It tried to rise, but found that its own armor did not respond. "What--
Betrayer!"

"One cannot betray a cause one is not part of." Irony Man's optics
gazed into the Dorf's eyes, and through his rage he felt unnerved.

"But-- but you were *instrumental* to our cause! You provided the
mindscan that allowed me to emulate Toony Stork's emotions and
memories!"

"Indeed. If I had not, you would have taken it yourselves, and left
behind a substance remarkably similar to scrambled eggs. By preventing
that, I acquired an ally in this timeline. As to your cause, it did not
matter. The history books say the Legion stopped you, though not how."

"A time traveler!? You two-faced lying bastard!"

"Indeed." A panel opened in Irony Man's armor, and a small disc fell
out. "All that is left is to ensure that the lie continues, and things
turn out as they should."

"Hah! Fucker that you are, killing me to secure your own plans!
Hypocrite hero!"

"Killing you? No, Reg Hfffgrktt. Instead you will remember."

"...remember?" The unnerving feeling blossomed into fear. "Wh-- what
is that?"

"It is a teleport module capable of reaching Dorfia."

"...you're $#!%ing me. You can't expect me to believe that that
thing can send me hundreds of lightyears away."

"It can. And it will. And when you return home, you will remember
what it was like, to be Toony Stork. You will remember his friends. And
his failure. And his pain. And why he did it."

The Dorf shook in his metal prison. "Why!? You shit-brained pig-
licking fuckstick, WHY!?"

"The Dorfs have schismed, broken into factions of which you and your
companions are but one. An ideological civil war. By resurrecting the
Prophet, you hoped to prove the rightness of your cause. In a battle
like this, a few individuals can make the difference. And a Dorf who
knows what it is like to be human..."

"Damn you! DAMN YOU!" Flecks of foam flew from his mouth, and his
cheeks were red with rage. "Do you know how painful it was to see
through his eyes!?"

"Yes. I do."

And Reg Hfffgrktt vanished in a pale blue flash.

Irony Man stood, looking down at the spot where he had been. Then he
turned and opened the door, leaving Comics Snob Boy's room to the past.

--LNH-- --LNH-- --LNH--

Cynical Lass, Poignant Death Lass, and Painful Pun Person picked
their way down a dank corridor, wind whispering between the rough-cut
stones. Flickering torches lit their way, and somewhere, far off, was
the sound of dripping water.

"This is the same building where Multi-Tasking Man uses the waste
heat from the pocket cyclotron to make coffee, right?" said Cynical
Lass.

"Setting inconsistency isn't what I'm worried about," said Poignant
Death Lass. "How are we going to get out of here and into the sub-
basements proper?"

"That's pretty simple, if you're a-cute enough," said Painful Pun
Person. She stepped up to an apparently blank wall and gave it a puppy-
eyed pleading look, filled with charm and charisma.

Something in the stone chirped. "Retinal scan complete," said a
melodious voice, and the wall slid back. They stepped through into a
wide, tall corridor, with a plaque next to the door reading "Floor -12".

Cynical Lass shook her head. "Makes as much sense as anything. But
how'd you figure it out?"

Painful Pun Person smiled. "I'm just that a-door-able!"

Suddenly, a cloud of blue and red sparkles zoomed through the air
with a humanoid figure half-visible inside, giggling in glee.

Looking back at this issue, it reminds me a lot of 52 (which I reread
recnetly, and very much enjoyed all the non-Geoff Johns-y bits of). That
was a series written by a bunch of people with very distinctive creative
voices that somehow (well, Keith Giffen doing backgrounds through the
whole series helped, but) meshed into a cohesive whole. LNH v2 #50 was
similar. I know there were some bits that were attributed to other
people in previous discussions I'm pretty sure I wrote... but there are
also some bits where I have no idea who wrote them. I feel like we did a
good job all building on each other's strengths as writers; I know
working with Rob and Saxon really helped me level up.

I know the epilogue scenes were me and Drew. Those were written at the
end of 2014, coming off the high of the Gillen/McKelvie Young Avengers
ending (a series that played a huge role in me realizing I was queer).
That's where the whole anniversary party aspect came from.

Someday I really have to address Time Crapper IV getting married to
Betamax in the future (a Doctor Who-inspired bit, of course). Maybe
after I tackle a few of the other loose ends that I have floating around.

"This was supposed to celebrate everything that was great about the LNH
so we could go forward into a new era. Instead, it just about destroyed
us."--that line was of course me putting in my feelings about the
writing process. In the end, though, this story really did set up a new
era, with lots of stuff that played out in narratively rewarding ways--
the return of Halls and Cliche, Toony's definitively drawing a line
under his life as a net.hero, and especially Captain LNH and expanding
the overall mythology of Vector.

We were able to make the best of the frustrating circumstances behind
this issue, because it meant that LNH would have to leave behind a lot
of its past stock elements and find new stories, and by the end we were
already starting to build them. It really laid the seeds for the current
core LNH which is always dynamic and evolving, like the Claremont X-Men
in its prime. I'm very proud of this issue in the end, where it landed
thematically and emotionally and what it did for the LNH.

And I get a big smile out of seeing the credits list at the end.

Oh, and "Jump" by Kriss Kross was an in joke on my part--it was the
number one hit the week the first LNH post was made.

Jeanne Morningstar

On 12/19/21 11:35 PM, Jeanne Morningstar wrote:
> Looking back at this issue, it reminds me a lot of 52 (which I reread recnetly,
> and very much enjoyed all the non-Geoff Johns-y bits of). That was a series
> written by a bunch of people with very distinctive creative voices that somehow
> (well, Keith Giffen doing backgrounds through the whole series helped, but)
> meshed into a cohesive whole. LNH v2 #50 was similar.

Definitely agreed. :D

> I know there were some
> bits that were attributed to other people in previous discussions I'm pretty
> sure I wrote... but there are also some bits where I have no idea who wrote
> them.

Yeah that's entirely possible. X3

> I feel like we did a good job all building on each other's strengths as
> writers; I know working with Rob and Saxon really helped me level up.

Very much agreed. :>

> I know the epilogue scenes were me and Drew. Those were written at the end of
> 2014, coming off the high of the Gillen/McKelvie Young Avengers ending (a series
> that played a huge role in me realizing I was queer). That's where the whole
> anniversary party aspect came from.

YEAH :D

> Someday I really have to address Time Crapper IV getting married to Betamax in
> the future (a Doctor Who-inspired bit, of course). Maybe after I tackle a few of
> the other loose ends that I have floating around.

It's fun to have these hooks! n.n

> "This was supposed to celebrate everything that was great about the LNH so we
> could go forward into a new era. Instead, it just about destroyed us."--that
> line was of course me putting in my feelings about the writing process. In the
> end, though, this story really did set up a new era, with lots of stuff that
> played out in narratively rewarding ways-- the return of Halls and Cliche,
> Toony's definitively drawing a line under his life as a net.hero, and especially
> Captain LNH and expanding the overall mythology of Vector.

Yes!!! It's influenced so much of what we've done since!

> We were able to make the best of the frustrating circumstances behind this
> issue, because it meant that LNH would have to leave behind a lot of its past
> stock elements and find new stories, and by the end we were already starting to
> build them.

yessssssssss <3 <3 <3

> It really laid the seeds for the current core LNH which is always
> dynamic and evolving, like the Claremont X-Men in its prime. I'm very proud of
> this issue in the end, where it landed thematically and emotionally and what it
> did for the LNH.

Same. :>

> And I get a big smile out of seeing the credits list at the end.

:D :D :D I love putting that kind of feelsy shit in. I should do it for HHS too
maybe.

> Oh, and "Jump" by Kriss Kross was an in joke on my part--it was the number one
> hit the week the first LNH post was made.

That just feels so appropriate. X3

Drew "The Nineties" Nilium

On 12/12/21 4:27 PM, Arthur Spitzer wrote:
<snip>
> And we reach the conclusion (I mean, sure, I could probably split this into
> two more issues, but I'm not going to do that).

Fair. X3

> But is there
> something else this story could use? Perhaps something long forgotten from
> like the beginning of the story? Something that could return? Like maybe a
> -- GIGANTIC HELPING OF TACO SALAD CHEESECAKE!!!!? What? You don't want that!?
> Well, too bad, bub, because that's what you're going to get!

YEAH!!! <3 <3 <3

> The elevator went ding! The business end of Master Blaster's BIGGUN
> poked out, followed by the man himself.

This has always been a neat mental image to me. :>

> "It matters not," said Irony Man. "We must find Kid Kirby and tender
> to him the antidote to the Dorf virus."
>
> --LNH-- --LNH-- --LNH--
>
> "Hmmm," said Doctor Stomper. "I feel as if I've forgotten
> something."

This was when I was stitching the various scenes people had done together. X3

> "Danger is yet afoot," said Irony Man. "The Dorfish virus has
> spread, and not one is safe. Wherever we go, we may run into--"
>
> A groan issued into the corridor.
>
> "Who--" YNHMHELad spun in place. "Where's that coming from?"

This is me loving Rob's scene enough that I had to play off of it. <3.<3

>
> ARAK frowned. "Something is making my right eye water." He turned,
> slowly, staring forward and concentrating on the edge of vision, walking
> at an angle and groping at the wall until his hand came in contact with
> a doorframe. "Got you!"
>
> "A perception filter -- several, more than likely," said Irony Man,
> who opened the door and stepped within.
>
> "What are you guys talking about?" said Master Blaster, facing the
> opposite direction. ARAK sighed and guided him into the room.

An obvious gag but I love it. X3

> "I may be able to awaken him, then talk him down," said Irony Man.
> "But it would require solitude."
>
> "Oh?" Anal-Rententive Archive Kid raised an eyebrow.
>
> "He is my Secret Keeper."
>
> "Ah!" ARAK nodded, YNHMHELad's face lit with understanding, and
> Master Blaster grumbled. The Mysterious Secret and the Secret Keeper
> were ancient net.hero traditions passed down through Ages past. They
> could not be contravened, unless you thought you were Alan Moore or
> something.

heeheeheeheehee

> "But-- but you were *instrumental* to our cause! You provided the
> mindscan that allowed me to emulate Toony Stork's emotions and
> memories!"
>
> "Indeed. If I had not, you would have taken it yourselves, and left
> behind a substance remarkably similar to scrambled eggs. By preventing
> that, I acquired an ally in this timeline. As to your cause, it did not
> matter. The history books say the Legion stopped you, though not how."

I love playing around with this behind-the-scenes stuff~

> "The Dorfs have schismed, broken into factions of which you and your
> companions are but one. An ideological civil war. By resurrecting the
> Prophet, you hoped to prove the rightness of your cause.

Including making some implicit stuff explicit and setting up a status quo that's
still going. :>

> In a battle
> like this, a few individuals can make the difference. And a Dorf who
> knows what it is like to be human..."
>
> "Damn you! DAMN YOU!" Flecks of foam flew from his mouth, and his
> cheeks were red with rage. "Do you know how painful it was to see
> through his eyes!?"
>
> "Yes. I do."
>
> And Reg Hfffgrktt vanished in a pale blue flash.

I'm real proud of this scene. ^#^

> Cynical Lass, Poignant Death Lass, and Painful Pun Person picked
> their way down a dank corridor, wind whispering between the rough-cut
> stones. Flickering torches lit their way, and somewhere, far off, was
> the sound of dripping water.
>
> "This is the same building where Multi-Tasking Man uses the waste
> heat from the pocket cyclotron to make coffee, right?" said Cynical
> Lass.

heeheeheeheehee

> Suddenly, a cloud of blue and red sparkles zoomed through the air
> with a humanoid figure half-visible inside, giggling in glee.
>
> Poignant Death Lass squinted. "Was that Kid--"
>
> Even more suddenly, there was a loud ding! and the elevator doors
> they hadn't noticed opened, and Doctor Stomper stepped out.
>
> "Doctor Sto--"
>
> The most suddenly of all, Masterplan Lad, WikiBoy and Ubiquitous Boy
> Lad Jr. ran past, shouting and pointing at the sparkly cloud, and Doctor
> Stomper turned and ran after them.
>
> "..."
>
> Painful Pun Person pointed. "Chase that race!" And they ran after.

Sometimes stitching is just super fun. X3 And I love the breathless exposition
that follows this.

> Toony Stork could feel something choking the life out of him.

This bit was originally an independent piece of Arthur's that we worked into the
story. I think it really sings. <3

> "Your right hand appears to be an alien shapeshifter. Your left hand
> is some virtual reality construct that doesn't really exist. Your right
> leg is robot duplicate of your leg. Your left leg is a prophecy from
> the future about your left leg. And your buttocks appear to be from an
> alternate Looniverse (Earth-Millar) where every single member of the LNH
> is a complete asshole." Dr. Stomper took a deep breath. "And your brain
> -- well, appears to be divided three ways. One part is a clone brain
> that seems to be controlled by an evil government conspiracy. The second
> part is controlled by some body jumping supervillain (Dr. What-Me-
> Acting-Strange). And the last part is being controlled by you.

Every sentence of this paragraph is a different amazing joke.

> It's like
> your entire body is a composite of comic book tropes that Tom Russell
> doesn't like."
>
> "So, what's this mean?" said Irony Man with an uneasy expression on
> his face.
>
> Dr. Stomper took off his glasses and wiped them with his labcoat.
> "It means Tom Russell probably won't like this story when he reads it."

heeheeheehee! I think about this joke at least once a month. X3

> Dr. Stomper nodded. "Yes, I think if we download your good brain
> energy and install that into a cloned body of yourself -- that should do
> the trick. We'll have to install it into a teenage version of yourself
> though. Anything older and there'd be problems."
>
> "Me a teenager again? I guess I can live with that."
>
> "Oooh. Dibs on calling you Teeny Toony," said Catalyst Lass with a
> wink.

I wonder if anyone remembers the "Teen Tony" era of Iron Man, nowadays. X3
Considering how many terrible revamps we've had since then...

> "Having a nice dream?"
>
> "Well, it was better than being awake." Toony took the coffee and
> began to sip it.

God, the thick pain and irony of this part. I love it.

> Hmm, thought Taco Salad Cheesecake, no one seem to care what Taco
> Salad Cheesecake thinking. Once Taco Salad Cheesecake a vital part of
> issue #50, but now everyone forget Taco Salad Cheesecake. This make Taco
> Salad Cheesecake sad. Very sad.

This was such a good thing to bring back. X3

> And the Taco Salad Cheesecake began to focus on its shape. And feet
> began to sprout out of Taco Salad Cheesecake. And those feet lifted Taco
> Salad Cheesecake up and helped him leap towards the ground.

Astounding.

> Cheesecake Eater Lad walked over to the hole and saw the Taco Salad
> Cheesecake eating his way through the basement floor too. And the
> various sub-sub-basements beneath the basement.
>
> Cheesecake Eater Lad sighed and put down his plastic containers.
> "Note to self: Never ever *ever* make Taco Salad Cheesecake again."

heeheeheehee

> "..." Jarrek stared at the figure. A goddamned ruse. Looks like the
> Legion was a little less incompetent than they'd figured. He spun around
> and faced his troops. "Well guess what!"
>
> "WE KNOW ALREADY!" they shouted in unison, then ran in a
> disorganized scrum to the transporter room.