On 4/29/2022 8:53 AM, anim8rfsk wrote:
> Ubiquitous <weberm@polaris.net> wrote:
>>
>> What did you watch?
>
> Hey, thanks for asking!
>
> This… It’s going to be a weird one.
>
> Yesterday we were talking about shrinking Man movies. I went looking for
> one and instead the NETFLIX recommended I watch THE ONE. I have no idea
> why. But it turned out to be a turn of the century jet Li flick that’s the
> basis for all the weird current Multiverse stuff going on on stupid man and
> lame ass.
>
> It starts out with a narrator explaining about multiverses. Just to make
> sure it will play for a stupid audience. Between the opening narration and
> in show explanations we find out that there are an infinite number of
> universes. In this case infinite is 123. Every time a black hole goes off a
> new universe variant is created.
>
> Evil jet Li is jumping from universe to universe killing his doppelgängers.
> Every time he does he picks up the dead doppelgängers strength and speed
> and apparently ability to fly.

No, just jump high.

What we only find out halfway through the
> movie is that it isn’t just him getting the powers, it’s being divided
> between all the surviving jet lis. But at this point there’s only two left
> anyway.
>
> We are told that the dimension cops chasing them can’t kill either of them
> because it will destroy the entire universe that one comes from. Of course
> evil jet Li has killed 121 of these guys already. We’re told at another
> point that it will just kill all the other jet Li‘s. This seems like it
> would’ve been an easy way to stop the guy by just killing one of the
> innocent ones. Of course this still has the problem that Jet Lo has already
> killed 121 of his doppelgängers and no wackiness ensued.
>
> Oh and THE ONE last standing becomes a God. There’s a lot of Highlander in
> this.
>
> Jet Li‘s wife in most of these scenarios is an incredibly young incredibly
> hot and incredibly redheaded Carla Gugino. The dimension hopping cop
> chasing evil Jet Li is Jason Statham. I therefore unequivocably recommend
> this movie to Ian but not so much to anyone else.
>
> Good Jet Li decides for no conceivable reason to dress exactly like evil
> Jet Li. When they have the big showdown battle evil Jet Li for no reason
> at all takes off his black jacket and ties it around his waist. Oh, wait,
> that’s so we can tell them apart. Right before they get sucked back to
> dimension cop headquarters they take the jacket off the good one so you
> can’t tell them apart. Of course one doesn’t have a jacket at all and the
> other has his tied around his waist and Jason Statham has been watching the
> whole time so he really should be able to figure this out but they go a
> completely different direction instead.
>
> Then when the dimension cop boss orders good Jet Li returned to his home
> world which may or not be aware of the multi-verses Jason Statham takes
> over the transporter (ha ha) and despite his lengthy scene explaining they
> don’t have time travel capability, sounds good jet Li back in time to a
> different world so he can meet his wife and start over. How does Jason
> possibly know the coordinates for this and shouldn’t there still be a good
> Jet li in that world since it’s in the past?
>
> Bad jet Li goes to the prison world from Stargate SG one.
>

I do like that ending.

> And there are big lifts from the Terminator movies as well.
>
> Good looking, confusing as hell, lots of really bad wire effects to make
> jet Li fly, amusing differences like Al Gore being a terrible president and
> George Bush introducing universal healthcare, but I’ve spent worse hour and
> a half‘s.
>
>

This is a very frustrating movie. It came out right when Li's fame was
on the rise and right before Statham hit it big with The Transporter.
It's from the X-Files writing / directing team. It's a sci-fi movie
about the multiverse. It had all the makings to be great. But turned
out so mediocre! I mean, I like it. But it was such a huge
disappointment because it should have been so much better. I already
have plans to revisit "John Dies at the End" and "Everything Everywhere
All at Once" but I've been sitting on the fence as to if I want to
include this one or not. I'm still leaning towards not.

On 4/29/2022 11:01 AM, Arthur Lipscomb wrote:
> On 4/29/2022 8:53 AM, anim8rfsk wrote:
>> Ubiquitous <weberm@polaris.net> wrote:
>>>
>>> What did you watch?
>>
>> Hey, thanks for asking!
>>
>> This… It’s going to be a weird one.
>>
>> Yesterday we were talking about shrinking Man movies. I went looking for
>> one and instead the NETFLIX recommended I watch THE ONE. I have no idea
>> why. But it turned out to be a turn of the century jet Li flick that’s
>> the
>> basis for all the weird current Multiverse stuff going on on stupid
>> man and
>> lame ass.
>>
>> It starts out with a narrator explaining about multiverses. Just to make
>> sure it will play for a stupid audience. Between the opening narration
>> and
>> in show explanations we find out that there are an infinite number of
>> universes. In this case infinite is 123. Every time a black hole goes
>> off a
>> new universe variant is created.

Uhh, what? "Black hole goes off"?

<Snip>
>
> This is a very frustrating movie.  It came out right when Li's fame was
> on the rise and right before Statham hit it big with The Transporter.
> It's from the X-Files writing / directing team.  It's a sci-fi movie
> about the multiverse.  It had all the makings to be great.  But turned
> out so mediocre!  I mean, I like it.  But it was such a huge
> disappointment because it should have been so much better.  I already
> have plans to revisit "John Dies at the End" and "Everything Everywhere
> All at Once" but I've been sitting on the fence as to if I want to
> include this one or not.  I'm still leaning towards not.

Only Jet Li and Chuck Norris are badass enough to stand at the top of a
very wide stair and tell a billion or two of the worst of the worst from
the multiverse that he'll beat them all simultaneously. :D

--
I've done good in this world. Now I'm tired and just want to be a cranky
dirty old man.

On 4/30/2022 12:30 AM, anim8rfsk wrote:
> Arthur Lipscomb <arthur@alum.calberkeley.org> wrote:
>> On 4/29/2022 8:53 AM, anim8rfsk wrote:
>>> Ubiquitous <weberm@polaris.net> wrote:
>>>>
>>>> What did you watch?
>>>
>>> Hey, thanks for asking!
>>>
>>> This… It’s going to be a weird one.
>>>
>>> Yesterday we were talking about shrinking Man movies. I went looking for
>>> one and instead the NETFLIX recommended I watch THE ONE. I have no idea
>>> why. But it turned out to be a turn of the century jet Li flick that’s the
>>> basis for all the weird current Multiverse stuff going on on stupid man and
>>> lame ass.
>>>
>>> It starts out with a narrator explaining about multiverses. Just to make
>>> sure it will play for a stupid audience. Between the opening narration and
>>> in show explanations we find out that there are an infinite number of
>>> universes. In this case infinite is 123. Every time a black hole goes off a
>>> new universe variant is created.
>>>
>>> Evil jet Li is jumping from universe to universe killing his doppelgängers.
>>> Every time he does he picks up the dead doppelgängers strength and speed
>>> and apparently ability to fly.
>>
>> No, just jump high.
>
> He was clearly at the very least levitating. I’m not sure if that’s what he
> was supposed to be doing but that’s why it was so obvious it was wire work.
>
>
>>
>> What we only find out halfway through the
>>> movie is that it isn’t just him getting the powers, it’s being divided
>>> between all the surviving jet lis. But at this point there’s only two left
>>> anyway.
>>>
>>> We are told that the dimension cops chasing them can’t kill either of them
>>> because it will destroy the entire universe that one comes from. Of course
>>> evil jet Li has killed 121 of these guys already. We’re told at another
>>> point that it will just kill all the other jet Li‘s. This seems like it
>>> would’ve been an easy way to stop the guy by just killing one of the
>>> innocent ones. Of course this still has the problem that Jet Lo has already
>>> killed 121 of his doppelgängers and no wackiness ensued.
>>>
>>> Oh and THE ONE last standing becomes a God. There’s a lot of Highlander in
>>> this.
>>>
>>> Jet Li‘s wife in most of these scenarios is an incredibly young incredibly
>>> hot and incredibly redheaded Carla Gugino. The dimension hopping cop
>>> chasing evil Jet Li is Jason Statham. I therefore unequivocably recommend
>>> this movie to Ian but not so much to anyone else.
>>>
>>> Good Jet Li decides for no conceivable reason to dress exactly like evil
>>> Jet Li. When they have the big showdown battle evil Jet Li for no reason
>>> at all takes off his black jacket and ties it around his waist. Oh, wait,
>>> that’s so we can tell them apart. Right before they get sucked back to
>>> dimension cop headquarters they take the jacket off the good one so you
>>> can’t tell them apart. Of course one doesn’t have a jacket at all and the
>>> other has his tied around his waist and Jason Statham has been watching the
>>> whole time so he really should be able to figure this out but they go a
>>> completely different direction instead.
>>>
>>> Then when the dimension cop boss orders good Jet Li returned to his home
>>> world which may or not be aware of the multi-verses Jason Statham takes
>>> over the transporter (ha ha) and despite his lengthy scene explaining they
>>> don’t have time travel capability, sounds good jet Li back in time to a
>>> different world so he can meet his wife and start over. How does Jason
>>> possibly know the coordinates for this and shouldn’t there still be a good
>>> Jet li in that world since it’s in the past?
>>>
>>> Bad jet Li goes to the prison world from Stargate SG one.
>>>
>>
>> I do like that ending.
>
> Can you explain it to me? Yes, he’s getting a redo on how he met his now
> dead wife. But how did that come to be? Where and when is it?

It's the multiverse. In an infinite (or close enough) number of worlds,
there's a world where his wife is alive and and still single, and
there's no alternate version of himself to compete with, perhaps because
the evil version already killed the guy. No time travel is needed. Just
pick a world where he can have a do over.

And how does
> the Transporter know the coordinates for it?

If it's one of the worlds where evil Jet Li has already killed good Jet
Li, then the Transporter has probably already been there. Or at least
read a report about it.

But when I said I like the ending, I meant this ending:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fCu_mJgnKCg

>>
>>
>>> And there are big lifts from the Terminator movies as well.
>>>
>>> Good looking, confusing as hell, lots of really bad wire effects to make
>>> jet Li fly, amusing differences like Al Gore being a terrible president and
>>> George Bush introducing universal healthcare, but I’ve spent worse hour and
>>> a half‘s.
>>>
>>>
>>
>>
>> This is a very frustrating movie.
>
> Yes
>
>
> It came out right when Li's fame was
>> on the rise and right before Statham hit it big with The Transporter.
>> It's from the X-Files writing / directing team. It's a sci-fi movie
>> about the multiverse. It had all the makings to be great. But turned
>> out so mediocre! I mean, I like it. But it was such a huge
>> disappointment because it should have been so much better. I already
>> have plans to revisit "John Dies at the End" and "Everything Everywhere
>> All at Once" but I've been sitting on the fence as to if I want to
>> include this one or not. I'm still leaning towards not.
>>
>
> I agree with everything you said above.
>

If you want to see Li and Statham team up again, try "War"
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/War_(2007_film)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3kItMaElnJQ

Then of course there's the Expendables movies which starred both of them
for the first three. There's a fourth on the way, but apparently Li
won't be in it.