I have known many people – and that included myself – who were described by someone as being wrongly made. Claiming that someone is wrongly made is probably the most abusive thing that one can do. It has worse effects than sexual violence. It undermines self-confidence, and it leads to self-hatred and self-defeating behaviour. And that is one of the worst things that can be done to a person.

Thus, Nazis thought that Jews and Gypsies were evil and could only be evil. That is the most irrational thing that one can believe. Good and evil are a matter of choice, not ethnicity or psychology. Anyone capable of choice can be good. This is the case with Jews and Gypsies; it is also the case with narcissists and sociopaths.

So, Melanie’s mother was claiming that she was a bad seed. Yet Melanie did a lot to help her. She made it possible for her to leave a man who was beating her. Melanie has gone on to help many people in very meaningful ways. She has done much more for people than has her mother, and for her mother to say such things about her is completely wrong.

So we see people being held accountable for the contents of their character but are denied the right to improve their character. This is hypocrisy. If your character is your choice then you can do with it whatever you want to.. And if you cannot do that, then your character is not a choice and you can’t be held accountable for it. Pick one or the other; both cannot be.

To claim that someone is wrongly made is a vast cruelty. It is a greater cruelty than anything committed by the sociopaths and the narcissists, much less the Gypsies or the Jews. It becomes the task of any conscientious individual to confront such behaviour. What we see here is greater abuse than sexual violence. Which means that it must be approached and treated as such.