Will Dockery wrote:
>
> Passage Through Ennui

> 35 years ago
> it was another
> long bitter Summer
> that dark humid July 1985.

> I was working
> the graveyard shift
> operating one of the service elevators
> at Shadowville Spinning Mill.

> Galatea and I
> had split up again
> earlier in the year
> after our explosive reunion
> in 1983.

> It ended quickly
> after a huge fight
> with her brother
> over an old score
> usually forgotten.

> I won the fight
> but actually lost.
> Tracy gave up
> and Galatea left with him.

> The year
> it all came apart
> seemingly permanent.
> Two years of good times
> ended in a moonshine rage. .

> All I could see was
> a shut down gloom.
> The only laughter I heard
> was down in the break room.

> The brown haze of factory air
> angry faced people
> and the music
> of metal machines.

> Working all night
> sleeping all day.
> Sipping coffee
> to chase the road aspirins.

> Sitting on the steps
> over by a giant fan.
> keeping up with my workers
> usually five ladies
> at the machines.

> If one of the ladies
> needed anything
> they'd just look my way
> and wave.

> Several times a night
> I'd make a buy and fly
> bringing back coffee for them
> on makeshift cardboard trays.

> Jotting down notes
> doodling narratives
> creating reality
> building Shadowville
> from the ground up.

> Riding my elevator
> up and down
> creating samizdat
> in the smoking booth.

> Down to the Reel room
> my elevator filled
> with empty racks
> to bring up the full ones
> for the ladies upstairs.

> All night
> keeping it rolling
> making it smooth
> for the ladies
> to make production.

> Finally to clock out
> as the sad whistle would blow
> we would stumble out the gate
> into the grey dawn.

> Some headed for breakfast
> and a beer
> while always I headed home
> for sleep
> as quickly as possible.

> Living at Mockingbird Court
> where I had shared a trailer
> with my friend Bob Whitman
> an Army vet turned factory worker.

> Bob worked downstairs
> at the Autoclave
> the machine that steamed chemicals
> into the yarn.

> Bob's sidekick Jim Berg
> ran the huge Dryers
> a super hot
> chemical steam bath area.

> Jim married
> my childhood friend Pamela
> and passed away too soon
> from a heart attack

> I'm not sure how workers
> down there
> survived the heat
> and harsh smell.

> Actually
> I noticed not so well
> as years went by
> several old friends
> still haunt me.

> There was a guy named Bill
> from Chicago
> found in the Dryer room
> coughing up blood from TB.

> Chip, another Autoclave man
> was found
> giggling in the warehouse
> up in the bales of fiber
> one line of meth too many.

> Little Rosell
> on the Reels downstairs
> hot little femme fatale
> who I would know better later.

> An unteresting lady
> in her Daisy Duke shorts
> and "Flashdance" shirt
> she was the supervisors' choice.

> Pipe smoking old Mr. Green
> found in a hallway
> died there of old age.

> The list goes on
> many who did not survive
> until the shut down day
> another poem for another day.

> At that time of the night
> with machines all running right
> many of us could wander
> have some coffee
> and get some fresh air.

> Bob was a good friend
> at the job
> quick with a joke
> or pass his pipe for a toke.

> Many smokers and drinkers
> would hang out
> on the porch
> outside the Autoclave room.

> When he heard
> of my latest domestic disaster
> Bob offered
> to rent me a room.

> In a rented room
> in Bob's trailer
> like a scene from The Odd Couple
> without the laughs.

> The bottom fell out
> we didn't get along
> outside of the job
> so I moved out
> to North Highland.

> I moved in
> next door to the Holt family
> old school mill folk
> in the former mill village.

> Don, Walter and Karen Holden
> all worked at
> Shadowville Spinning Mill
> like their family before them.

> Karen worked in the supply room
> Walter ran the Autoclave in Plant One
> Don covered my job
> during the say shift.

> For some reason
> it was important to them
> that they tell Mr. Newberry
> that I was their cousin.

> I never did figure that out
> but it was cool with me.
> I liked them all
> they were down to Earth folks.

> The day I moved in
> I had my music playing loud
> outside my window
> was the river
> and then Alabama.

> I would never have imagined
> how that area would look now
> with the row of houses demolished
> and with the Riverwalk below.

> I was two floors up
> but I still felt
> like a mole
> like a subterranean.

> Wake up
> it was Monday
> I could hear Billy Teakson
> blowing his horn in his pickup truck
> down below.

> Billy was an old school
> Card and Blending room man
> never late
> sick or well he was on the job.

> Slither down the stairs
> so far so good
> jump in and ride on
> the the alternate universe
> the factory.

> He never failed
> to have a spare Budweiser
> and a smoke
> for the short ride to
> Shadowville Spinning Mill.

> We'd get there in time
> to stand around the parking lot
> and catch a few words
> with the crew.

> Then the whistle would blow
> and it was on your mark
> sail through 12 hours of dream
> in another land.

> Grabbed a cup of rotgut
> mill coffee
> and then
> in a determined stroll.

> Up to the Bobbin Winders
> and the upstairs Reels
> to catch everything up quick
> get the game going right.

> Then down the elevator
> to the Spinning room
> sweat shop
> a dozen ladies
> smoking and yelling conversations.

> Loud roaring
> antique seeming machinery
> all all points
> no escape from
> the chaos and thunder.

> Get it all caught up
> then down to the sub basement
> to pick up the prize left for me
> by Don
> my first shift doppelganger.

> Any time Don
> skipped out early
> and left everything
> off the mark, it was no problem.

> He'd leave me a joint
> at a certain spot
> in the sub basement.

> The basement was
> creepy enough
> but the sub basement
> seemed right out
> of a horror movie.

> Needless to say
> I'd keep my head down
> and would try to get out
> of the sub basement quickly.

> I had been distributing
> my broadsheets
> among my co-worker friends
> news of the day
> with a twist.

> They were entertained
> by my poetry
> and comic strips
> looking for themselves
> in the lines on paper.

> Pat, the personnel director
> called me in her office
> and put the kibosh
> on my broadsheet.

> My poetry and art zine
> had violated the strict
> "No Distribution" policy
> that no outside reading
> was permitted inside the mill gates.

> Since I had not been
> aware of this policy
> I apologized
> and kept the broadsides
> outside the gates from then on.

> Absolutely
> no foreknowledge
> of what was coming next
> taking one minute at a time.

> Getting from one minute
> to the next
> always in a hurry
> caught up in the time
> flashing by.

> Not even giving a damn
> or so I told myself
> by that point in time
> hoping for a speedy turnabout.

> I never could have foreseen
> twenty years later in 2005
> standing in a crowd
> watching the old mill in flames

> I was living
> in the worn out townhouse
> at 3226 River Avenue
> once part of a mill village.

> First week of the month
> was always annoying
> so much noise
> as I tried to sleep.

> All day hearing Mr. Newberry
> beating on the sides
> of the houses with his cane
> trying to collect his rent money.

> Alone
> in my upstairs office
> writing my manifesto
> in poetry and comic strips.

> Right side duplex
> next door to the Holden family.
> Two stories overlooking
> the dark green Chattahoochee.

> If I had the foresight
> I would know sitting and waiting
> was wasting precious time
> the cruelty of moments.

> Time can't be saved
> like in a bank.
> I thought I was biding my time
> while I was losing everything.

> As the North Highland
> sun blazed down.
> And as the cool white moon
> seemed to watch over it all.

> The big rooms
> and empty house
> suited my mood
> my lonesome and blue.

> Looking out my upstairs window
> dabbling on a canvas
> not a clue
> what was to come.

> Walked down to Forte's Pharmacy
> for a beer and some smokes
> the place is long gone now
> 35 years later.

> Back then it was
> the general store
> where the locals stood around
> shooting the breeze.

> Although relatively close
> the walk was winding
> to get around
> the far side of the factory.

> Found a girl named Margo
> she lived
> a few doors down
> from my place.

> She said she liked my music
> but had thought Bob Dylan's song
> was The Clash
> but I found her naivete charming.

> Took her out and played the game
> but my heart
> just wasn't in it
> I never saw Margo again
> after that night.

> At that time all seemed lost
> just goes to show
> I'm not much of a fortune teller
> but kept hope alive.

> Many nights seemed like others
> so I trudged
> through the days
> wrote poetry
> through the night.

> Crossed my heart
> and looked forward
> to good luck
> and happy days again.

> No happy ending
> was expected
> in the foreseeable future
> just more of the same.

> -Will Dockery

> ------------------------------
> From the Shadowville Mythos poetry blog:
> https://shadowville-mythos.blogspot.com/2021/04/passage-through-ennui.html

Having a second read, LUV it, one of your finest epics....