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aus+uk / uk.comp.sys.mac / If they had studied their science...

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o If they had studied their science...rj..@shell02.TheWorld.com

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If they had studied their science...

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From: rj....@shell02.TheWorld.invalid (rj..@shell02.TheWorld.com)
Newsgroups: sci.logic,uk.comp.sys.mac,sci.electronics.design,alt.global-warming,rec.audio.opinion,sci.math
Subject: If they had studied their science...
Date: Mon, 03 Apr 2023 12:12:50 -0400
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 by: rj..@shell02.TheWorl - Mon, 3 Apr 2023 16:12 UTC

www.latimes.com

Direct from the LA Times:

"In retrospect, lighting the match was my big mistake. But I was only
trying to retrieve the gerbil," Michael Ejercito told bemused doctors
in the Severe Burns Unit of Salt Lake City Hospital. Ejercito, and his
homosexual partner Andrew B. Chung, had been admitted for emergency
treatment after a felching session had gone seriously wrong.

"I pushed a cardboard tube up his rectum and slipped Raggot, our
gerbil, in," he explained. "As usual, Chung shouted out 'Armageddon',
my cue that he'd had enough. I tried to retrieve Raggot but he
wouldn't come out again,so I peered into the tube and struck a match,
thinking the light might attract him."

At a hushed press conference, a hospital spokesman described what
happened next. "The match ignited a pocket of intestinal gas and a
flame shot out the tubing, igniting Mr Ejercito's hair and severely
burning his face. It also set fire to the gerbil's fur and whiskers
which in turn ignited a larger pocket of gas further up the intestine,
propelling the rodent out like a cannonball."

Michael Ejercito suffered second degree burns and a broken nose from
the impact of the gerbil, while Andrew B. Chung suffered first and
second degree burns to his anus and lower intestinal tract.

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