On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:25:33 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 4:44:00 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 4:35:29 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 2:06:33 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 12:18:11 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 11:48:48 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:00:40 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 10:15:18 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 9:40:36 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 9:07:21 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 8:11:18 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 7:48:21 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 7:38:38 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 4:14:31 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 3:33:40 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:59:36 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:56:42 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 10:50:01 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 12:30:35 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 12:03:27 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 11:33:28 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 10:40:48 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 9:50:02 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 9:45:56 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 7:29:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 6:38:09 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 5:07:15 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:41:22 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:40:14 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:31:28 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:24:38 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 2:29:02 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 2:25:34 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 1:40:22 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 12:14:30 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 12:05:02 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 11:52:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 10:34:20 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:54:20 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:12:54 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:08:43 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 7:03:13 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 7:00:27 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 2:39:55 PM UTC-5, B.H. wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 12:44:04 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, February 25, 2023 at 11:15:19 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ...the bot shot down my post again, but I thought to copy it before I posted it, so I can still paste it below:
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just had a totally great idea just now! I was reflecting on the fact that I recently devise two very excellent STEM-based ideas for figuring out how to predict the stock market. I also have devised some great STEM-based ideas for how to communicate well, especially in writing...that project of devising more such ideas is ongoing.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Then, it occurred to me, based on some of my notes about my recent chess games: I could get into using STEM ideas to analyze and especially improve my performance at chess and running.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I decided to go back to Deep Run Park to start doing at least a little bit of running, now without music, starting tomorrow. I will still walk at the mall, because I don't find walking at DRP to be relaxing given all the weird people who show up there. Anyway, that is my new plan for what to do with my time now...I have been feeling fine, did well today, and felt less restricted and more "able to not have to be 'calming down' at night to feel OK," than I had felt in the past. The bot choking affected me only minimally, my mood was still much better than it had been in the 2 weeks preceding.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, that is my update for now. I feel a little unhappy that I am probably going to be known only as a writer, and not a science publisher, but think that is the right decision for me. I will get credit for writing, and I might branch into "persuasive/quasi-political non-fiction," as opposed to "here-you-go-America-free-service" non-fiction, as I was sort of thinking of doing at first. I really doubt I will change my mind, the decision, which seems quite right, is still just slowly sinking in...I am very likely to be a writer, full-time, and pour my STEM ideas into that, not any "sharing of secret family-enabling math ideas."
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I will get more used to the idea and enthusiastic about it after it has been sinking in for a few days or weeks.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > After reviewing my job applications again, I am ready to say that I'm cautiously optimistic that I will get a job. I am not sure, but I am eagerly anticipating hearing back from one or more of the employers that I applied to in this next upcoming week.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Today, I'm going to do my usual things--not really start in until 2, although it's kind of boring to just do nothing for so many hours when I keep waking up at around 10 or so...I woke up in the middle of the night last night with a very fast heart rate, but it settled down and was fine, it's probably related to past bot conditioning attempts, and my cardio is good enough that I will be fine I'm sure.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm going to do my run, and start investigating "performance enhancement science" ideas...I'm pretty sure I will be the most competitive person in the world at that, as well as at, in general, physics, computer science, mathematics, statistics, communication, and writing. Hopefully I will get my chess game and exercise abilities in top-notch shape, too!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I believe I get it...I understand something...anyway, I decided to skip running for today after all, and focus on other "research-related activities."
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I will do great, and my plans at this point haven't really changed.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A quick comment about a new understanding I have of my CIA opponents: They think that their attention to detail, thoroughness in planning, and very aggressive engineering efforts will, once demonstrated, somehow "break my morale" because (they think) "I am immoral" because "I am mentally ill and not Christian," and I do not acknowledge them as being above me in any way morally--for sure, given how they act. Basically, they have been continually baffled by how their aggressive demonstrations have led to me absorbing and reverse engineering a lot of their most valued secret technologies, including ones that I find knowledge of to be extremely useful to me and that I do not wish to repeat, even though I could since it is not my disclosure of classified information (is it classified?) that is being readily passed to unauthorized persons, that is what they are doing. The compartment of the CIA that is supervising in a way what is happening is apparently very much unaware of some of the secret technologies I have learned about, simply by spectating and watching their absurd, inappropriate theatrics.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just felt like saying that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > In short, it seems like almost nothing will stop the CIA from illegally leaking many of their most valuable classified secrets to me, rather frequently, without my consent or permission. I am being very unusually educated, and I did not ask to be.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Another thing I realized about Richard Darkins' comment: If people in the US are familiar with me and Biden's attacks on me, then if they really think that Biden is going to succeed at continuing to bother me, given how many times he has lied and how I have been perfectly honest and the fact that honesty is a trait and the five-factor model is established science, then such people clearly do not understand or do not accept the science of the five-factor model.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I learned a lot more important and interesting things today.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My updates list of activities in the future is now:
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - publishing writing (fiction and maybe non-fiction)--no STEM or writing code at all
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - investing, based on scientific principles and not computer algorithms
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - day job (I might not reveal where I would be moving or what industry it is, given the levels of harassment and friendliness around here)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - boxing (I think it is a good idea for me to pursue a sport in my free time, not just exercise)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - continuing private science research that I will not share to fuel my other endeavors
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I *think* I will still be able to Africa, probably in a number of years rather than right away. You will note, I am avoiding things that are unfairly "access denied" activities for minority people and others who face discrimination. My plans are perfectly ethical and benevolent. I will persist in my efforts to help Africa, and also likely to help out in whatever community I am able to settle in comfortably.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On a personal and psychological note: As I noted, I recently became aware that a lot of things can be addicting. I've done a good, perfect-track-record job of stopping watching adult videos and stopping listening to modern music on purpose, cold turkey. Today, I noticed that I was feeling a little bit different and more absorbed in my own thinking, partly in a good way, but I think it is because I have been doing too many gaming activities, especially playing "Space Trader Merchant Marine," which is actually a really fun game--I beat the whole 5-level campaign part of the game, and today, I finished the first two "challenge" sections of the game...I think there are three sections of the challenge thing total. Anyway, I think I'm spending too much time on gaming, and I need to take a break. I said it was for therapeutic reasons, and I don't want to over-do it. I am also going to not play chess for a while. I didn't play today, but I was playing lots of games in the past few days before that...in the future, I will probably limit my chess activity to weekends. I'll probably still play a lot of games, but just in a few segments. I had been playing games with 10 minutes per side, and I was doing it for practice. I got tired quickly in many cases.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Thus, I have decided to stop all gaming activities for the next 3 days. In four days, I'll evaluate and see if I want to start up again, or if I'm doing fine without it. I might eventually finish the last challenge thing in STMM, but I don't want to mess up my health, particularly at a sensitive time like this for me, when I'm still being assaulted by bots sometimes, even choked at night, with the full and extremely inappropriate support of Congress.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I know what I'm going to be working on for the next few days also. I'm planning out what to do while I wait to hear back regarding my job search. I applied to about 10 jobs, and I decided that I won't apply to more jobs...I believe I'm qualified, and there shouldn't be any reason why I wouldn't hear back from the employers even just having applied to 10 jobs. If my "email interview" rate is less than 10%, something is wrong anyway.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK...I'm done with everything I was going to do tonight, really. I have a little bit more food to eat, I'm going to try to relax and feel good, hopefully I'll get a good night of sleep without bot interruptions, and I am looking forward to having a peaceful day tomorrow...maybe I'll get a phone interview request since it's Monday, we'll see! I am trying to be optimistic and good-natured.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Some sort of random thoughts: I have started to feel as though I do not like the websites youtube.com or cnn.com visually. I wonder if that is a psychological thing, since I don't use YouTube for modern music any more. I sort of don't like logging in to YouTube sometimes, just because I don't want to have to look at the web design of that website.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I have a pleasant enough day planned for tomorrow. I have decided that I will not be traveling anywhere far until I can get a job. My only work task tomorrow is going to be working on a STEM-based art, writing, and communication idea tomorrow...it should be interesting, even though I really only have an hour set aside for that work, and no time set aside for any other work. (I'll probably have to stock up on groceries again tomorrow.)
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It might be a challenge to find things to do until 2 p.m. when I wake up, since I'm not doing any gaming activities for 3 days. Maybe I should try to think of something to do if I wake up at around 10 or 11, which I probably will. I would want to do something relaxing and low-stress...hmmmm...I don't think I should get involved in doing anything on the internet, and I don't really feel like reading...Shift is a fine novel and I'm some number of chapters into it, but I don't want to keep reading it right now. No gaming, so that basically rules out everything on the computer other than typing, since I said no internet. Hmmm...maybe I could drive somewhere, but I don't want to over do the trips to the mall for walking, 1 or 2 a day seems to be enough. Also, my typical thing to do for now is sort of "act like I haven't woken up until 2" since I am trying to be nice to myself for sleeping better and having woken up early, so I have been typically not eating or showering until 2. I don't think I want to exercise in the mornings...what shall I do? I already told Rosey that I am going to try to space out my visits with her to be only about once every two weeks, which she seemed to approve of, along with my other (perfectly legal to make) disclosures about IC/military technology to her that may help her understand household life better. AFAIK, Rosey understands a lot of English quite well...I think she has some ability to learn words from reading emotional cues, I don't think she understands every single thing I say, but I sort of think she knows how to "prioritize her attention" based on tone-of-voice cues, and I bet she can kind of tell if I'm just saying some sort of "generic 'good girl! what a good puppy!'" kind of thing, and when I'm saying something more content-heavy that she should try to parse the words of. That is just my guess though.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I also do not want to try to watch any TV shows. I think what I should do is some sort of "fun, easy, relaxing, psychological health activity"...something I can just type about and not get too "new STEM heavy" with, but just some sort of simple enough prompt-based idea for thinking of something to say about myself and the interactions I've had in some way that could maybe help my psychological health, particularly in terms of decreasing stress and anxiety and "ghost feelings of upsetness" that I can't explain. That is probably what I will do tomorrow...I'll probably try to design a prompt for that tonight and write it down on my computer, and then consider doing that tomorrow early on if I'm up early.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Hopefully I can think of something sort of mildly original and different from the usual psych activities I have done in the past.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Yo, I just have to let you know right now...the truth is, I thought of the 'Calculus Man' joke before anyone else, it was my idea. Everything else? It was exchanged for that joke by the creators of Superman. I'll show myself out now."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Something occurred to me this evening...probably, Sasha Burkhoff, whose names sounds like it was selected by her parents to sound like "the perfect name for a well-respected cryptologist," and thus a possible prospect as as NSA recruit as a mentally healthy student who had attended TJHSST in Virginia, had her brain-tumor-caused murder orchestrated initially by pro-life activists. According to my analysis, there is no other reason or group who would do it. I never actually spoke with Sasha, just saw and much later thought to recall a look she gave me when I think she had been diagnosed by the brain tumor, but I didn't have a strong emotional reaction, not that I was unkind or inappropriate about it in any way, but my sense of it is, she sounds like a target of pro-life religious extremists who didn't like TJHSST in general, didn't feel it was worth to murder me--they surely faced counter-attacks, probably including lethal ones, for their actions--since I was set up to be tortured as a math slave for years, and they could only pick out one student to kill to send a message about the NSA and the types of extremist fighters whom they might have felt would work there...in theory...so my sense of it is, even if she was a religious Christian and supported pro-life positions, she might have been targeted for not being "tough enough" on pro-choicer's, like my grandmother, who was kind to me although I am a liberal atheist...she even tried to not speak to me too much when I was physically present in the house, apparently that doesn't suffice for the extremists. Anyway, it is also certainly possible that Sasha was actively pro-choice. I think my theory is right. Relatedly, probably, Heath Ledger was murdered over some sort of political cause he had supported in a movie before The Dark Knight...I don't know what that would be, but my guess is, judging from Julia Stiles's comments about Ledger and Chrissy Teigen, who emotionally abused and harassed a gay man, according to what I read, he probably supported gay rights much more than actresses like Maggie Gylenhall and Julia Stiles felt comfortable...probably more "pro-choice, that's it, I just say I'm liberal" types.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, I realized that Dr. Kudurogianis was not evil...he is also facing threats, I'm sure, and did the amount of helpful psychiatric work that he felt he would be able to do safely...I think he omitted some "emotional distress" and "employment/socialization" issues due to reasons I would not understand, perhaps related to his safety or something else. I think it is fairly clear that the psychiatric treatment that he did helped me a lot...if I become suspicious that he was actually evil once again, based on me having noticed some detail that I hadn't seen before, I will probably be sure to post my latest theory about that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Great news for people who are on my side! I spent this morning beginning and planning out further work on a "STEM-based system for recovering psychologically from harassment attacks," so that I can use some of my best secret ideas to identify cognitive issues I may be having, including with "inclinations to snap at other angrily," feeling restricted from doing certain things for no good reason, not caring enough and feeling callous about people whom I'm trying to care about and ought to care about, and other issues, and use my competitively excellent ideas to work on "fixing the damage to my mind muscles/processes" so that I can "exercise those muscles" healthily and without pain so that I can get them to be stronger and working properly, as they were in the past and should be for my health and sense of identity/self-concept. Also good news: I think that given local residents' plots to sabotage me psychologically for whatever weird reason, this announcement will demoralize them, and my announcement that it will demoralize them will likely vex them if they want to start up more strange "Wile E. Coyote schemes" to "trick and deceive and psychologically 'hex'" me to feel or perform in a way that is not my best. I.e., I think they will start to realize that their weird and freaky endeavors to mess with me are not a good investment of their time, and they'll sense the regret and unhappiness they will feel later when they see that it didn't work and was all just a frankly pathetic waste of their time, and their movement to bother me will lose enthusiasm.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, my psychology activity for this morning was a big success! I have planned some more work on it to do tomorrow, during my main hours of activity during the day, after 2 p.m.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A comment about this ordeal: I note that there were *very many* people who, in this crisis situation for me, were essentially required to do enough of their part to "give me the password" to get out of trouble. A lot of people refused, in some cases citing right-wing extremist ideology, and in other cases citing threats to them and their families. The thing about the latter situation is, basically, a lot of people "passed the burden" to my family leading to at least two relatives dying, very likely murdered by the CIA, while the other people "wanted to play it safe." I.e., by not doing their jobs, they aggressively and inappropriately passed the "lack of safety burden" from their families to mine, causing damage. Thus, the "right to be outraged and to retaliate" lies with the people who are in my family who are unethical, not with them. Basically, the JACM, Cornell, and Cambridge University in Britain, murdered my grandmother and my uncle, citing, in a sense ,a desire to be safe by virtue of having a good, sustained relationship with political terrorists and mobsters in the CIA, who illegally kill innocent people to seek to pursue their political will.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said "people in my family who are ethical," that's an inserted typo.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Oh, Publix just started discriminating against me today...how original and surprising. I CuRrEnTlY have a very thick skin about this sort of thing, and it doesn't bother me or affect me that much...I will keep shopping there for now while I still live in this dumb area. It's just, "Say goodbye to all your appealing future career possibilities, Publix employees! You don't even know what you are doing professionally, at all, and the double entendre in this sentence is intended!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Regarding my job search...I can see 9 of the jobs I applied to on the panel on the job applications website; the region I applied to is in a different time zone in the USA. I am very qualified, and I applied last Wednesday. I hope I am not being locked out by another tiresome political attack on me for no reason, one that would have pointed at me no matter what I said or did, simply because I am a mentally atheist. Anyway, I only heard back from one employer so far, and they said no to my application. Hopefully I will hear more from the other employers within the next few days...how thoroughly did Donald Trump and his lieutenants seize control of the US job market??! I hope I won't wind up just sitting here, exerting political power by typing out things on Usenet, using new STEM ideas that I have that are under development that bad guys wouldn't understand because they are not able to "crack the code" of the English language! I would really prefer to be an employed private citizen, not an ongoing law-abiding anti-US-government antagonist using cutting edge STEM capabilities to trip up US political agendas pretty much every day! Gosh, I wish I could stop feeling compelled to mess with with the USA's secretly right-wing extremist, anti-Semitic, anti-Muslim, anti-atheist government for a week or two!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The US Democratic Party has never before been forced to negotiate a full, unconditional "political surrender" to anyone, have they? Well, if I'm still here in a couple months, you'll all get to find out that feels. Imagine an America with *NO LIBERALISM WHATSOEVER.* Are you excited to live in that world? Is that what you are voting for by denying my rights, or would you like to delude yourselves and side with Biden? Indeed, I *couldn't* convince the Democrats to stop hurting or be reasonable...I can't educate them on how to be smart and rational, all I can do is destroy everything everything they ever fought for, for me because I like me and I think my life and rights matter, and then keep attacking everyone, ruining everything they've gotten and fought for over the years, until they have nothing left and realize how dumb they were.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Would you be gentler in some way if I did what you did to me to one of you? No! You are doing things to me, and I haven't committed *one* crime against any of you or any of your backers. If I had eagerly served you and gotten nothing in returned, you would have tried to Auschwitz me anyway, and would not have backed no matter what. Get ready to see where this path with leads, I'm now apparently about to be your tour guide to a whole new America that you will not recognize and not like, because it will have been politically completely re-shaped by me with cutting edge science ideas, unless I am able to not face discrimination during my job search. How much is it worth to you? Did you, "everything?" Hint: Yes, and you're right! That's what it will cost. You're already paying a large percentage of the total possible cost, do you want to increase that or decrease that?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Basically, my failure was, I thought the US leaders were self-interested and smart. I thought they would be smart enough and not crazy, and would let me have my rights and let me go. I guess they are not that smart, and insist on being pummeled some more. Either that, or I'm gong to be getting interviewed sometime this week that's for sure.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Basically, at this point, if you have been a bad guy linked to the team of people who are homicidally stalking me, if you are not done with me by the end of this week and I am not actively interviewing for jobs, you will soon be done enjoying any benefits of American liberalism, period. I have the power to do that, no one else does. Did you miss what happened to Build Back Better, abortion rights, the US military's power, Biden's approval ratings, Democratic control of Congress, and even Donald Trump being used as a threat or having a viable candidacy, due to my use of my STEM powers and the US government's failure to heed my protest on behalf of my basic Constitutional rights? In that case, I even *told you fools* *exactly* what I was doing, STEM-wise. Next time, it will be a different set of excellent capabilities, and I will not tell you a think about what I'm doing, it will devastate Democrats politically, you won't be able to guess what I'm doing with algorithms or anything else, and it will all be perfectly legitimate and in accordance with the rules. Now let me go or face the consequences!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I did a great job on my STEM research task today...things are coming along extremely well, and my work is even more fun than usual. I have more such work to do tomorrow.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Regarding the conflict: To say it again another way: The clear and repeated and persistent, un-American argument of my opponents who think I should be caged and not allowed to socialize, date, or have a job, is: "We have every right to ignore the separation of church and state and freedom of religion in the US Constitution, because we would prefer to view atheists as cattle, with worthless lives, whom the government has the right to slaughter or try to slaughter, without any respect for their rights or feelings, at any time that we choose, with no regard for any laws. We may also slaughter people like cattle that we see as 'failing to dehumanize atheists' and being too friendly with them." That is the kind of extremist you've signed up to support if you're backing Biden and his cronies. You don't want to go there, it's roughly the same thing as anti-Semitism.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A couple of developments:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 1 - It looks like the mall has changed its hours, and now it closes at 7 p.m. I don't think it used to...I wonder if the Christian church that meets in two of the store-type areas had something to do with the change, to make a statement about me?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 2 - It occurred to me this evening that some time ago, someone credible hinted to me that I was likely being considered for the position of Secretary of Defense some time ago. I might have been the youngest one if my various promotions and career achievements hadn't been sabotaged! It is probably a good idea for me to mention this at this time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A dramatic reflection on my recent learning endeavors:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Ze codes, Mr. Vite. Ze codes! Now you see...velcome to schizophrenia, ze codes, zey make you genius!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I seem to be mostly out of jokes though. Remember when I said--rapped, rather:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "If I say things are like things and express opinion
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Each booty babe will fail to not become my minion"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ...remember when that seemed like it was going to be true?? What happened????!! All those comedic rap songs, and all I got was...uh...deniably video messaged by Zara Larsson and then blocked. Step up to the plate, yo! You only live once, and there's only one me. My arrogance, like so much else, knows no bounds...just as it is with my physics knowledge, I'm one of a kind! Now, in a space-time continuum sense, it is all women in the USA who are desperate, deep down, maybe unconsciously, to meet me, and not the other way around! Again, it's like Linkin Park always envisioned for me: "So [he's] waitin' until the upper hand is [his]....". Don't disrespect the prophecy, yo!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Would that I could calibrate my jokes to be funnier, for the perfect audience...forsooth.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (Yes, this again.)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, I do not actually know if Zara Larsson is a Nazi who supports murdering me for being an atheist. I wrote above assuming she was not.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, regarding the Richard Dawkins Tweet: Here is a really good idea; I would think that every single US citizen who is currently residing in the US, has heard of me or met me and heard what happened to me, is alive and feeling well, and never supported right-wing extremism, and didn't get a chance to get in touch when I demanded to be contacted between Sept 2020 and the present, ought to send me an email, at least wishing me well, maybe offering to see if there is anything such a person could do to help me, given that I will have basically just gotten out of a de facto American (??!) concentration camp.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The obvious question about why any such person who would read this and then not get in touch with me is, "Why not?," and it would tend to suggest that such a person, given my insistence and biography and status as a virtuous bipolar American atheist, would either feel "extremely threatened by a still-tyrannical US government," or, more likely, would be a "radicalized right-wing extremist residing in America who supports ethnic cleanings operations, against the mentally ill, against atheists, and against black people residing in Africa." Otherwise, why wouldn't such a person at least send a quick email checking it? It would seem to suggest some sort of "mass radicalization epidemic" that hit the USA, that would have hit the people who refused to contact me, and that there is indeed, as Fox News suggested when speaking of a "silent majority," that a very large number of people in the USA have apparently converted to fascism. Otherwise, I would receive at least a quick "glad you're feeling better' email for sure, from everyone who had heard of me, given that I would be like Anne Frank if she had managed to just finish escaping from a Nazi concentration camp...surely all of the people who wished her well and didn't support her being tortured and murdered by Nazis would want to send her an email congratulating her on her escape and wishing her well? There could be no other explanation, of course.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK, so I am going to go to bed soon. I am pleased that, looking at the text I've written and the lack of any coherent response to it or accusation from government officials or anyone else with authority, it is clear that it has been clear, for months now, that I am totally and 100% a victim of right-wing extremists in government and beyond...I am not a bad guy and never deserved this. So that is good.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, my science projects are going well. I am feeling a little bit mildly restless at night--it is hard to tell how much of that is due to the wake-ups from the government-linked bad guys--but mostly I feel fine each day. Just bored, ready for things to change so that I can get out of here and have a real, normal life as I and other innocent people deserve to have. I am one of the smartest and most talented people in the world now, so in spite of my set backs, I am a fairly fortunate person in terms of talent and long-term (decades-type term) outcome....I'm sure I'll be doing great in my 40's, I'll just be a little bit older and past my prime physically. Mentally, I'll surely still be the best theorem prover in the world, and that will be the source of my talent, which I'll be sure to stockpile and keep to myself.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So...I am trying to think of ways to relax at night. I looked at the YouTube videos again, and in spite of my different viewing choices, they are all completely *useless*, the recommendations totally suck and it is unpleasant even looking at the thumbnails on the main page. Now that I'm avoiding Twitter due to discrimination, I am starting to feel like groups.google.com is the only site I ever want to visit, except for maybe checking my email accounts on Yahoo and Gmail, and also occasionally glancing at cnn.com, which is also a crap website, but I ought to know a few of the top headlines that are not being covered up at any given time. So yeah. I am finding writing in my offline files to be more productive and interesting than anything there is to do online. I like typing in my offline files and walking, and eating, and I wish I could socialize and date and maybe have sex. Other than that, I'm not all that limited...I can't do work for money yet, perhaps due to government limitations, but I can still exert more political and other power than anyone else in the world....I'll have all my latest ideas set up and ready to use soon, and I'll just type what I want to type on Usenet, and see how that goes. It should have an impact, and again, it won't be unethical or against the law...I'll be sure. So my "job," coming soon if I'm not released or employed, will be writing appropriate STEM-backed posts, in captivity, on the internet to continue to exert my political will on the world. I should be allowed to socialize and friends--I'm a perfectly nice and quite normal person, I follow the rules, don't do anything wrong, just file complaints about the epidemic of weirdos bothering me and never start fights, always do the right thing, never do any weird or creepy/strange things to other people like try to "scare them" or follow them around or harass them, always behave appropriately and like I should. Anyway, I'll see where this ends pretty soon I'm sure...the bad guys, I don't think, can take many more losses...I mean they can, but they really wouldn't look like they are even employed if they keep pushing with this, I don't get how such high-power leaders of the US, in such a competitive field, can be so completely stupid, irrational, nakedly and publicly pro-extremism and pro-terrorism, and able to still maintain approval ratings of about 30%. I admit, I'm quite stunned by that capability...how can such incompetent figure out a way to keep their jobs without ever doing them, how on earth do they do that? I'm not jealous and don't want to copy that, but the example is stunning and interesting in its own right, like Caligula's success as a Roman leader.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Once again, I am thinking some more about Richard Dawkins' Tweet. Liar drops R; maybe that means, Joe Biden drops Regency Mall, without the monolith, i.e., I will get hired based on the region I correctly applied to. If so, great! That will be excellent. My usual "Donkey Kong dance," not that I think mentally ill people should be considered apes, but I'm thinking of the "aggressive impactful stomping" of sorts, before big event relevant to me that might be sabotaged that may require a "vocally aggressive send-off to the immediate predecessor time" just before the full result is in, to pre-attack in case I've been "foiled again by a pinball-tilt wizard with no ethics or sense of 'gosh, that was too much, enough is enough,'" is basically contained above in some of the writing. I basically always do that, in this situation where I post a lot in public, right before I think that something big and important I'm working towards is about to possibly be sabotaged into not working right again, based on an initial "bad sign," which just be an incidental thing and nothing to worry about over all.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I'm thinking maybe I will get a job. I hope so. I'm going to turn the computer off pretty soon and get more fully ready to fall asleep.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, I am a little bit worried about: the guy with the bald head who used to also walk on Quioccasin Road who I think was mentally ill, Kristen, who sometimes walked on Quioccasin Road and seemed to have disappeared recently, and the guy that I saw who was black who seemed like he was mentally ill on Quioccasin, and the white guy who looked like he liked to wear military camouflage type of clothing and a hat whom I would see on Quioccasin road...there was also the black guy that I called "nodding head man" who used to bother me, he might have been mentally ill, and maybe I shouldn't blame him for having bothered me by nodding his fast when I was very much more sensitive and messed up due, I think, to trauma-related mental illness. Is anyone going to help them if they are still in trouble and not where they want to be in life yet? They looked like they were totally shunned by the local community and very under-supported, if they did indeed have mental health problems...probably they weren't even all identifying as atheists. I hope that my "monolith" will be their "monolith," too, i.e., that they will be able to get out of isolation, if they're in isolation in the Tuckahoe area and not already out of isolation.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A couple more comments:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Yeah I trained my "inner word-fighter persona" in melee combat with Ras al CVS. I stole the power to be extremely rude, with or without a reason of any sort.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - This morning, I noticed that my neck and shoulders felt a little weird and sort of sore, like it would feel comfortable to rest my head by tilting it to the right, like I was Stephen Hawking who was paralyzed and had his head looking like it was at an angle in his wheelchair, at least that was my perception...maybe it was not actually at much of an angle, checking the photos on Google briefly. It sounds like a nasty joke about me and atheists and highly competent STEM people, and I received a credible psych hint about the government-linked gesture doing this, suggesting that it is not a total surprise, perhaps, and a psych professional somewhere knew that a gesture of this nature would be done at some point, and maybe the perpetrator's psychological state and behavior are not necessarily hard to explain or predict, to an extent, at all. Yes, there is probably something psychological to be learned from my own initial explorations into basic amateur psychology...what did I reach for first, how is my "first-choice" lens to reach for characterized? Whatever. I'm mainly pivoting back to "easy psych ideas," just because my psych "research," amateur and not valuable/competitive or not, is mainly just to help me improve my own health for now, not to win any "innovative psychology research contests" or anything along those lines. I'm more interested in competing, vaguely speaking, at "applied math that I can use to get ahead at almost anything performance-related," in a variety of different contexts.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Remember: It is the lives of Nazis and other intolerant right-wing extremists that are worthless, not the lives of the people that they target and despise.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > youtube.com/watch?v=C9SiRNibD14&embeds_euri=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2F&source_ve_path=MjM4NTE&feature=emb_title
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yes, this video is sad. Science is a good thing--the means to power, health, safety, technological progress, and often prosperity.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, it is concerning that this woman from Africa is trying to like Newton's scientific achievements with colonization. There is no evidence that science is linked to discrimination or exploitation of minority groups or people outside of the US.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A concern is that many people would argue that people who want to support colonizing or otherwise support exploiting Africa ought to be killed, i.e., if it is not illegal in your country to kill someone who wants to support fascism or slavery-like activities, then it would not be a bad idea to kill that person, like killing a Confederate or Nazi soldier in battle; the lives of confirmed fascists are worthless, and within the constraints of US law in America, ought to be either imprisoned, killed, or otherwise removed from relevance and ideally prosperity, as soon as possible. That goes for anyone who wants to eliminate some or all people from a particular legitimate background as though they had no rights, whether the background is ethnic, religious, or something else not related to "being an evil predatory fascist."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I am hoping that she does not mean that she thinks that pro-science people should be killed. Sadly, if she adopted such a position and pushed for it, she would put herself into a very bad category. I am speaking about this because I believe that people in Africa, who may have been denied some Western educational benefits, deserve more of a chance to turn around mistaken behavior and not support hurting pro-science people, including science-interested students in school who might not thrive without education...although that is different from wanting "pro-science people killed," and she didn't say that she wanted that, I am just worried about the claimed connection between colonialism and science.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My point is that people who support murder and fascism become, after a certain possible grace period of controversial length, people with worthless lives. Most people who fought for Naziism in WW2 ought not be given a chance to "tell everyone they're sorry and repent," that's good enough. There are some fascists from different parts of history that should not be allowed out of jail for 500 years. I still oppose the death penalty avidly, but any person who converts to fascism, while not losing his or her rights as a possibly accused criminal person or not, loses the "desirability of their existence," although it might be illegal to kill them without a trial.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So my point is, do not ever join forces with fascists, no matter what opinions you may have about people from backgrounds other than your own--you may champion your beliefs and backgrounds, but never support the denial of rights or the denial of desirability of other people being alive, unless such people are fascists, i.e., people who themselves deny the desirability of being alive to others over a mere beliefs-based disagreement that does involve calling for the deaths of innocent, "maybe just wrong" people, as opposed to true fascists.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said, "that's not good enough."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Someone outside signaled me to "see Bill Gates," so I did.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > What is he saying? "PW aim [is getting close with] the world" ? What, now for the first time? Is this some sort of reverse psychology trick?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Why didn't Microsoft offer to hire me, since it understood my talent all along?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My aim is to have my own life, withhold my STEM talents as punishment for the "slavery and extraction" initiative that political terrorists backed, presumably because they didn't want me to get big at DOD because criminals in STEM business, like Zuckerberg and possibly also Gates--I don't know--might fear my rules-based leadership and top-notch talent at STEM. I also want to help Africa. Is there some sort of claim that I have been inconsistent in anything I said?? Is it claimed that my chemistry disclosure, related to BQP = P and disease cures, somehow does *not* cure cancer?? Please, check with an expert who still trusts you, if you can find one! I am definitely no longer "crank" by any measure, and I never was one, just somewhat ignorant about classical mechanics and other areas of physics--I had been quite behind on studying, now I am not--I don't have a deep understanding of relativity, general or special, but I get the very basics of QM, and I understand classical mechanics well.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Bill Gates must not smear me, or risk being seen as "just another big-money-man cheater who fought his way to the top, became 'a king of having money,' and added no value to the world," just as the excellent researcher and publisher CS Christos Papadimitriou seems to have predicted, sort of.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I *will* help Africa if I can make the money. Why wouldn't I? Is it claimed that I cannot, that I don't have the will to spend money on such things? Does Gates actually believe that a condition for my freedom, as a brilliant, totally innocent atheist who is much better at math, CS, and engineering than he is, even as a top-ranked business leader, is that I must "serve the world" with my STEM talents, publishing free "naked photos of all the things that make me powerful," so that he can make money from them and not I? I've given more than enough free STEM gifts to the world, it is time for me to be *compensated* for my work, and also, well past time for me to be liberated--unlike Gates, I've never been credibly accused of committing a serious crime.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe Gates is questioning why I have lost interest in STEM. Oh, is he pretending that he doesn't know a certain fact about computers, or does he actually not know?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, if Gates is not a fascist or homicidal criminal at least, I *demand* his full support for my release. He should have offered to buy my IP, but not being a likely candidate for being ethical, he probably would never do that. I have nothing to fear from a "lacking Bill Gates like" as long as I do not work as a STEM worker in the STEM industry; his "like" is irrelevant in my new chosen field.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > A question about the local community:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Are most citizens in the Tuckahoe area *actually* claiming that they "don't really have free speech rights or the right to peaceably assemble near me," or is that another fake-out attempt? If they believe that, do they accept that, and is their defense against further curtailments against their rights, due to their crimes, that "no one has the capability to do anything to us, so we're just going to keep doing our way?" I think that attitude will not get a good outcome; no one wants to tell you how certain techniques for dealing with "right-wing bad guy daredevils" are sometimes used to fight back.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Whatever that other post says on my thread, I am not reading it.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > So, the Little League tragedy of today is, Publix once again was deliberately out of YoCrunch (they claimed credit for it yesterday). Clearly, there is only one question about this situation: Will I, or will I not, get into volunteer "Retail Rap" under the rapper name, "Cashier Fatherf---er For Fun," and how many cashier careers will I mercilessly ruin with the awesome power of the pen?? IS there a limit to how much damage I can enjoy myself while sustaining it and waiting for whatever to happen? Who knew hurting bad-guy people's lives could be so fun???
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Yo, I gotta start right there, I can't just leave that hanging, yo....
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > UNTITLED RAP
> > > > > > > > > > > > > by Cashier Fatherf---er For Fun
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Yo, my name is Manheim, they think they're Julia Right
> > > > > > > > > > > > > A Stiles motherpredecessor, ring it up as a fight, yo...
> > > > > > > > > > > > > I can't delete losers as fast as I shop, but
> > > > > > > > > > > > > I would compete to get losers' heads on a justice chopping block
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > You know, I am an artist--my words are OK--because, I
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Fight relentlessly to just prove I'm still not gay, because I
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Am gay deep down, unless it's a statement to show, that
> > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm not intimidated by deletions of Yo-
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Crunch, um, you knew that was coming 'cause I rap about me
> > > > > > > > > > > > > I channel adrenaline and I charge a fee, you see
> > > > > > > > > > > > > The metaphorical gun flash but you think there's no gun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > And yeah, it's just a metaphor, I smoked you for fun
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > [begin snare]
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm not Obama--I just snort Confederates when stuck on an island
> > > > > > > > > > > > > If I write aggressive raps and die will they scream, "Oh, why, man??!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Does anyone miss anyone without a new rap atmosphere?--no.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > I thought I proved to them my strength is from being non-sex-queer, though.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Quirky adrenaline, you'll never trace it down, guys
> > > > > > > > > > > > > I spurt technologies, and you lose blood like dead flies
> > > > > > > > > > > > > You sign up for death and more death and I'm totally blameless
> > > > > > > > > > > > > I thought He'd cancel you, but everyone's shameless.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > [guitar solo]
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > I need an outro that returns to the central
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Theme of my rap which is that you are all no-go's
> > > > > > > > > > > > > I use that word and not the p-slur--I'm perfect
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Still bag the groceries miss, your life is now worthless.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > That's my rap song! What do you think? I feel comfortable asserting that viciously insulting intransigent law breaker cashiers is not harassment or stalking, as long as I don't name names or say anything directly in public. I have a right to make political speech, in the form of art, whether your like it or not. A lot of people are saying that they hate me for stupid reasons, why not get more insulting, see if they like it more? Maybe some professional rapper will come out and say how much they hate me too, I'll be sure to quiver. Also, I'm still under duress, as anyone can see! The hate-fueled nightmare is supposed to never end according to them, I don't have to persuade you, if you don't know how to think, it's your graves, Confederacy punks! Fascists always lose! Don't delude yourselves about exactly what you are! Note, retail work is fine, if you do it WITHOUT trying to intimidate, harass, gaslight, or discriminate against people. Let's see how juiced up Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren will get this time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > That was fun. Now on to other things.
> > > > > > > > > > > > Yeah that's right I was actually mean, once. What!!!!!
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > No I am not going to publish any new STEM ideas to help the military or other goons. I'm immune to all manipulative tricks, I'm done outputting STEM, forever, you're on your own, losers.
> > > > > > > > > > > I'm starting to worry that Biden shut down my job search in another state, too. The job was one I was extremely qualified for, and I still haven't heard anything positive from any of the jobs I applied to.
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > So...do all geographic regions in the USA support the idea that Biden is completely control of law-abiding, intelligent religious minorities' members being able to get a job, literally anywhere? Can Biden shut down good career moves for any atheist in the USA? I suspect that the answer is yes, and no one will talk about it...I hope something really nasty and permanent happens to the people who are making sleazy deals of this nature, in clear support of anti-atheist fascism.
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > Anyway...I don't know what to do next, I have fought and worked as hard as almost anyone ever could, but just as Einstein would have trouble getting out of a concentration camp if he had stayed in Germany for too long, all my talents and work and digging deep, and really exerting myself to try to look out for myself and exercise my legal rights and get a good job have thwarted by vastly populated legions, sadly, of American right-wing extremists. They are not being challenged enough, they have largely taken over the economy of the country, and contrary to my initial belief, it looks like they do not merely control STEM and retail.
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > FYI, I am not saying it is a Jewish conspiracy, in case someone thinks that I sound like some sort of bad guy who is claiming that "Jews are trying to control everything." It is not Jewish people, it is American political crooks. WHEN will they cut this out? It has been almost 12 years, I tried asking nicely and appealing to reason and the evidence and my innocence, I tried demonstrations of my STEM talent and was just smeared (e.g., with the Hodge Conjecture, my logic result, the twin prime conjecture, etc.), I finally resorted to aggressively attacking the fascist leaders who are perpetrating this...what am I supposed to do? What is any person in my position, being innocent and just mentally ill and an atheist, supposed to do to get away from extra-judicial assaults and "containment efforts" made against by government-employed fascists?? Someone is supposed to fix this! I could warn of the consequences--some of them have already been faced--but I am growing tired of that. Don't try to convert the USA to a racist dictatorship, that is not good for anyone. Leave me alone and let me work!!! Fascists deserve death, not liberals!
> > > > > > > > > > I just realized something: The government still thinks it's going to use "stress" and "psychological manipulation" to manipulate my mood and feelings, and put me in great distress--probably with a few more "false hope" things, then "choking incidents," then "weird and confusing signals that seem to be about something important...but what are they really saying?", and try to manipulate me into changing my mind into publishing more STEM.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > In the past, I definitely changed my mind about publishing differential equations--I thought it would help, and it probably did...it probably ended the US's ability to be a navy and air force superpower, basically permanently, unless more help would be provided by me.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > I do not share things at random. I try to do what is in my interests, whether I'm stressed out and desperate (I probably won't be in the near future at all) or not. I have done a really good job on working on being able to relax. I AM NOT GOING TO PUBLISH ANY MORE STEM. I made sure, after I changed my mind on diff eq publication, to also change my mind and "declare law-abiding war on the US Department of Defense," and I did that, and I won...I tossed them a breakable code using BPP = P, and they can use it, but it doesn't matter--all their secret things were lost to their adversaries via flight surveillance and cryptology during the no-codes phase.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > I won the war on DOD, they just want to deny it, and now shower THEMSELVES with false hope and optimism, thinking that they are "such great Christian guys, of COURSE they'll get it back, the US NEVER loses like this," precisely because the US has never been this morally wrong-headed or right-wing and extremist before; the US declared war on terrorism in 2001, and thus itself in the near future--today.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > I WILL NEVER PUBLISH MORE STEM TO HELP THE GOVERNMENT FOR ANY OTHER REASON. It is over, I am keeping it to myself to fuel other endeavors, I am *never* going to try to help *anyone*, other than my own children, with STEM sharing or explanation efforts, EVER AGAIN.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Maybe that will clarify some things.
> > > > > > > > > My day today was fairly pleasant. I had to go to Food Lion to get YoCrunch because Publix still wouldn't stock it...whatever. I will probably write more "rather absurd rap songs" to exercise my sense of humor, since I can't even talk right now, but I'll probably be more light-hearted and less mean in the future.
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > Somewhat disappointingly, my schedule for my day tomorrow is basically exactly the same as my schedule for today. I worked for more than an hour on my math research task today, which was great and yielded some good ideas. I am still continuing the same research tomorrow, and I might do it for at most 2 more days before I move on. I am only doing real work for 1-2 hours a day right now, and I'm still on my gaming break. I might stay on that, unless I get more headaches soon.
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > I am starting to think that the end of this will have nothing to do with getting the job I was trying to get from the job search. Do I have to wait for the government to relent? What about waiting for the wildly nutty local citizens to relent? I don't see what they are thinking or afraid of or doing, why are they *all* *still* siding with fascist ideologies, do they think they will get some sort of warmth and protection from that? That is not a good move, side with the truth, good values, patriotism, the US Constitution, and me, not code-talking terrorist linked insider threat bad guys who "have a job in the government." I had a job in the government, let me tell you, that helps you 0% with law enforcement, whether you mention it or not, if you get arrested or TDO'd (I have never been arrested, but I have been TDO'd, twice by police, sometimes even improperly, shortly after quitting jobs as an NSA contractor...it changes nothing, which is how it is supposed to work). I.e., even if you think you have power from a government position and try to abuse it, the police will just ignore that. It's just a job, it's not a magical "becoming a king or queen" ceremony, you really shouldn't see government employees as "larger than life," they're mostly very inefficient and ineffective at getting things done at the office.
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > So anyway...I am trying to be calm, since it's getting late. I am trying to relax and not vent any more angry feelings or "creative interpretations for debate/persuasion/etc." about this nonsense. I wonder what it will take for me to be spoken to again? I don't know. I might take a break from all work pretty soon, but then I wouldn't know what to do with all my time.
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > Yeah, I wonder what the end of this will look like. Which will happen first? Will local residents come to their senses and stop backing fascists and code-talking liars? Will I get a job? Will someone from another state or another country write to me? Will the DOD write to me to apologize for their huge mistake/crime? Will the news run a story forcing a bad US political leader to resign, decreasing interest in this "project?" I don't know, but I've waited for over a decade for justice and access to my Constitutional rights!! What a farce, I don't know for sure what exactly these people are thinking.
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > Anyway, I'm going to try to have a pleasant night.
> > > > > > > > So, now that night-time is here, I note I would probably feel more relaxed if I typed something relaxing. Who knows why. I should be high-energy and full of comments and ideas and even a little bit of aggression during the day--I just remembered that I said I was going to stop being aggressive, but it is sometimes hard to remember all the different changes I wanted to make to improve my psych health, it's not that important that I stick to that, it is just important that I never publish STEM again.
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Anyway, I think the "monolith" is: Regency Mall drops Regency, i.e., when the local mall loses its administrative authority given to it on behalf of a monarch. What authority is that? What exactly can they do? I think Dawkins' subsequent comment, which came out to "clatter lordie," suggests that the Christian church there got investigated for extremism after my comment...I did see a little bit of evidence of that, some man inside one of their areas made a sort-of Nazi salute gesture at me, I mainly just ignored that, that sort of thing is pretty common around here.
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Maybe I should disclose more strange mall activity?...they keep sending groups of young men with one overweight chesty woman by to say things, the group today yelled "penis" when I looked at them, and the woman made eye contact with me and said something like "bye bye Kyle," which is the first name of a male patient at Dominion Hospital that I went to see Dr. Steg in 2001. Maybe it helps to repeat these things, I don't know. I heard some other man say "bye Felicia" loudly a while ago, a number of days ago, at the mall. I heard a woman who looked pretty and might have been Hispanic talking on the phone, near the "escape rooms" thing with her group of friends, and I heard her say, "I have a reservation" over the phone, perhaps she was from out of town.
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Last time with the overweight chesty woman, the code was something like "a cost" then "most sag" and then the code had like "two sniffles" after that, I don't know what they were trying to say. Whatever, I don't get the point or message of what they're trying to do, it sounds unfriendly. I saw a group of teenagers coming by, and they made some sort of like aggressive gesture while looking at me, like, "WHAT?!", and I didn't pay that much attention to them.
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > There was a large group of people singing in the Christian church area a few days ago. Today, a black man in a Harvard sweatshirt came out of the bottom of the elevator, holding a staff or stick or whatever. Today, I saw a security guy on one of those electronic rolling segue thing, making some sort of gesture. I saw a guy like that working for security before; he did that when I first started walking there, then the next a different security guy started quickly shaking his head at me, then I complained, then there were two security workers sitting at a desk, and one of them sort of "put their hands up," a lot like one of the female workers at Food Lion did one time. I don't know the gang codes at all, I'm just posting to maybe help "drop the regency of Regency Mall," maybe it will work!
> > > > > > > Actually, no, DOS, "roboticdeepthroatconditioning.mil" is not a good idea for a web-based app for your upcoming startup. Get a little more creative, there actually are some fascists out there who are even better at thinking and science than you.
> > > > > > Rap About Walking In the RVA Area, Etc.
> > > > > > by Broom Philip
> > > > > >
> > > > > > I've got to find a place to walk every day
> > > > > > The FBI is like shut down, so criminals may
> > > > > > Do what they want to do whenever they want
> > > > > > Follow me through shopping malls, grocery stores, and Deep Run Park
> > > > > >
> > > > > > So I am writing a rap to kill some time, you know
> > > > > > I see the anarchists have killed fighting crime, and so
> > > > > > My free time's spent on research food and health
> > > > > > While the world is acting like it's favored by stealth
> > > > > >
> > > > > > They think the secret spies stalk their enemies better
> > > > > > If they can't see it, they think, it makes women wetter
> > > > > > The movie-like atmosphere of intriguing spy pirates
> > > > > > Is, they think, the beauty of all violence in silence
> > > > > >
> > > > > > The rap is weak today 'cause it's just a drill
> > > > > > You'd rather have just me and not the FBI chill, but
> > > > > > Indeed you wanted Sin City but got Gotham instead
> > > > > > You think you're safest when your eyes are closed in bed
> > > > > >
> > > > > > My self-expression requires no apology, now
> > > > > > They changed god to mysteriousness in their brand new theology, now
> > > > > > The Christian church no longer has its true savior
> > > > > > And, they think forgiveness green lights every behavior.
> > > > > Here is my latest prediction of how it will end: On March 14 or so, 18 days after Dawkins' Tweet, Biden has predicted in public in code that Vladimir Putin will be killed by a US-linked drone strike, and then Biden's approval ratings will go up and he'll look more likely to win the 2024 election. The truth is, though, the capabilities to be dominant, air-force-wise, over Russia have been removed for the US; they cannot possibly have the power to do that sort of assassination any more--no country has that kind of power any more, at least not over the top developed nations with the GDP to support "the standard air force." Perhaps the bad guys will finally drop me and admit assaulting me wasn't worth it, even taking morality out of the equation. *Hopefully* they will regain a sliver of their sanity.
> > > > Update regarding my job search: I think I did apply to the right region--a place that is not against, e.g., LGBTQ people--and I think that there are firms that would like to reach out to me. My guess is, some political group essentially made "huge threats" against the firms that seemed likely to communicate with me, and there is a "brief pause for a battle," that the employers will win. So far, none of the 10 or so firms I applied to have written back except one...I bet they will, and it will just take a while, due to political pressure, which one of the firms even says it does not value above equal opportunity, even in cases of stalking.
> > > A comment on an excerpt from the article linked to on Richard Dawkins' Twitter:
> > >
> > > https://www.spectator.co.uk/article/who-really-discovered-dnas-structure/
> > >
> > > "This is a story replete with competition, friction, misunderstanding and some sexism, but it lacks anything truly unethical, let alone criminal.. Four men and one woman, none of whom was perfect ... "
> > >
> > > What? "...it lacks anything truly unethical..." ??! How exactly can one claim that refusing to cite someone else's research contribution, particularly when there was a huge breakthrough with big incentivized possibilities on the table, not being cited is not unethical?? I believe they were truly paying attention, and got press and thus an opportunity to correct themselves...it is very unethical to fail to cite research contributions, unless it is an accident and, once this is pointed out, a full and profuse apology is made by the non-citers. Researchers, including me, very often do not get paid anything beyond, in the cases of Ph.D. professors, "acceptable satisfaction of publishing requirements" to keep their jobs--I don't know if there are raise calculations involved--and so it is very important to cite research and things that contribute to research whenever a publication is done. I try to do so even informally when, in the past, I published things on the internet.
> > I also watched the first three minutes of this:
> >
> > https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E3bLSePqCvc&feature=youtu.be
> >
> > Interestingly, I didn't know about natural selection before I was in middle school myself...it is interesting to think about different education curriculums in different countries. I think I got better at understanding it in 9th grade. Also, I was very interested in genetic algorithms in college....before I figured out how to actually solve the discrete logarithm problem, one of my early attempts was based on genetic algorithms.
> >
> > One way to view the idea of evolution speed--since you might wonder, with respect to what metric or dimension are you defining speed, or change with time?--is to think about some way to formalize the idea of "changes to the 'fitness function'" in a collection of evolving entities over generations.
> >
> > You could argue that breeding is likely to bring about "very large changes to the minimum Hamming distance between possible binary Turing machine indexes that could be used to represent each fitness function." I don't actually know that much about biological evolution--is it just the genetic code that evolves and mutates, or is there more to it than that??--but I think my idea is good.
> >
> > Just so you know, I count that as "discussion of STEM ideas," not publication of anything truly new or revolutionary. I.e., I am talking about something I know in STEM, not trying to "serve anyone" with more valuable research disclosures.
> An amusing thing I just realized: It is almost certainly true that Abigail Spanberger has actually *never* worked for the CIA, and made up the whole claim to bolster career as a political leader. It sounds like she did not get a job there...I realized that there is something that she would definitely know if she had successfully obtained a TS/SCI clearance at that particular agency. It's actually quite funny.

On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:43:16 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:25:33 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 4:44:00 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 4:35:29 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 2:06:33 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 12:18:11 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 11:48:48 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:00:40 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 10:15:18 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 9:40:36 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 9:07:21 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 8:11:18 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 7:48:21 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 7:38:38 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 4:14:31 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 3:33:40 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:59:36 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:56:42 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 10:50:01 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 12:30:35 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 12:03:27 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 11:33:28 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 10:40:48 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 9:50:02 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 9:45:56 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 7:29:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 6:38:09 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 5:07:15 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:41:22 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:40:14 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:31:28 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:24:38 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 2:29:02 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 2:25:34 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 1:40:22 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 12:14:30 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 12:05:02 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 11:52:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 10:34:20 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:54:20 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:12:54 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:08:43 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 7:03:13 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 7:00:27 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 2:39:55 PM UTC-5, B.H. wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 12:44:04 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, February 25, 2023 at 11:15:19 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ...the bot shot down my post again, but I thought to copy it before I posted it, so I can still paste it below:
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just had a totally great idea just now! I was reflecting on the fact that I recently devise two very excellent STEM-based ideas for figuring out how to predict the stock market. I also have devised some great STEM-based ideas for how to communicate well, especially in writing...that project of devising more such ideas is ongoing.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Then, it occurred to me, based on some of my notes about my recent chess games: I could get into using STEM ideas to analyze and especially improve my performance at chess and running.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I decided to go back to Deep Run Park to start doing at least a little bit of running, now without music, starting tomorrow. I will still walk at the mall, because I don't find walking at DRP to be relaxing given all the weird people who show up there. Anyway, that is my new plan for what to do with my time now...I have been feeling fine, did well today, and felt less restricted and more "able to not have to be 'calming down' at night to feel OK," than I had felt in the past. The bot choking affected me only minimally, my mood was still much better than it had been in the 2 weeks preceding.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, that is my update for now. I feel a little unhappy that I am probably going to be known only as a writer, and not a science publisher, but think that is the right decision for me. I will get credit for writing, and I might branch into "persuasive/quasi-political non-fiction," as opposed to "here-you-go-America-free-service" non-fiction, as I was sort of thinking of doing at first. I really doubt I will change my mind, the decision, which seems quite right, is still just slowly sinking in...I am very likely to be a writer, full-time, and pour my STEM ideas into that, not any "sharing of secret family-enabling math ideas."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I will get more used to the idea and enthusiastic about it after it has been sinking in for a few days or weeks.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > After reviewing my job applications again, I am ready to say that I'm cautiously optimistic that I will get a job. I am not sure, but I am eagerly anticipating hearing back from one or more of the employers that I applied to in this next upcoming week.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Today, I'm going to do my usual things--not really start in until 2, although it's kind of boring to just do nothing for so many hours when I keep waking up at around 10 or so...I woke up in the middle of the night last night with a very fast heart rate, but it settled down and was fine, it's probably related to past bot conditioning attempts, and my cardio is good enough that I will be fine I'm sure.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm going to do my run, and start investigating "performance enhancement science" ideas...I'm pretty sure I will be the most competitive person in the world at that, as well as at, in general, physics, computer science, mathematics, statistics, communication, and writing. Hopefully I will get my chess game and exercise abilities in top-notch shape, too!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I believe I get it...I understand something...anyway, I decided to skip running for today after all, and focus on other "research-related activities."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I will do great, and my plans at this point haven't really changed.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A quick comment about a new understanding I have of my CIA opponents: They think that their attention to detail, thoroughness in planning, and very aggressive engineering efforts will, once demonstrated, somehow "break my morale" because (they think) "I am immoral" because "I am mentally ill and not Christian," and I do not acknowledge them as being above me in any way morally--for sure, given how they act. Basically, they have been continually baffled by how their aggressive demonstrations have led to me absorbing and reverse engineering a lot of their most valued secret technologies, including ones that I find knowledge of to be extremely useful to me and that I do not wish to repeat, even though I could since it is not my disclosure of classified information (is it classified?) that is being readily passed to unauthorized persons, that is what they are doing. The compartment of the CIA that is supervising in a way what is happening is apparently very much unaware of some of the secret technologies I have learned about, simply by spectating and watching their absurd, inappropriate theatrics.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just felt like saying that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > In short, it seems like almost nothing will stop the CIA from illegally leaking many of their most valuable classified secrets to me, rather frequently, without my consent or permission. I am being very unusually educated, and I did not ask to be.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Another thing I realized about Richard Darkins' comment: If people in the US are familiar with me and Biden's attacks on me, then if they really think that Biden is going to succeed at continuing to bother me, given how many times he has lied and how I have been perfectly honest and the fact that honesty is a trait and the five-factor model is established science, then such people clearly do not understand or do not accept the science of the five-factor model.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I learned a lot more important and interesting things today.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My updates list of activities in the future is now:
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - publishing writing (fiction and maybe non-fiction)--no STEM or writing code at all
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - investing, based on scientific principles and not computer algorithms
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - day job (I might not reveal where I would be moving or what industry it is, given the levels of harassment and friendliness around here)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - boxing (I think it is a good idea for me to pursue a sport in my free time, not just exercise)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - continuing private science research that I will not share to fuel my other endeavors
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I *think* I will still be able to Africa, probably in a number of years rather than right away. You will note, I am avoiding things that are unfairly "access denied" activities for minority people and others who face discrimination. My plans are perfectly ethical and benevolent. I will persist in my efforts to help Africa, and also likely to help out in whatever community I am able to settle in comfortably.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On a personal and psychological note: As I noted, I recently became aware that a lot of things can be addicting. I've done a good, perfect-track-record job of stopping watching adult videos and stopping listening to modern music on purpose, cold turkey. Today, I noticed that I was feeling a little bit different and more absorbed in my own thinking, partly in a good way, but I think it is because I have been doing too many gaming activities, especially playing "Space Trader Merchant Marine," which is actually a really fun game--I beat the whole 5-level campaign part of the game, and today, I finished the first two "challenge" sections of the game...I think there are three sections of the challenge thing total. Anyway, I think I'm spending too much time on gaming, and I need to take a break. I said it was for therapeutic reasons, and I don't want to over-do it. I am also going to not play chess for a while. I didn't play today, but I was playing lots of games in the past few days before that...in the future, I will probably limit my chess activity to weekends. I'll probably still play a lot of games, but just in a few segments. I had been playing games with 10 minutes per side, and I was doing it for practice. I got tired quickly in many cases.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Thus, I have decided to stop all gaming activities for the next 3 days.. In four days, I'll evaluate and see if I want to start up again, or if I'm doing fine without it. I might eventually finish the last challenge thing in STMM, but I don't want to mess up my health, particularly at a sensitive time like this for me, when I'm still being assaulted by bots sometimes, even choked at night, with the full and extremely inappropriate support of Congress.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I know what I'm going to be working on for the next few days also. I'm planning out what to do while I wait to hear back regarding my job search. I applied to about 10 jobs, and I decided that I won't apply to more jobs....I believe I'm qualified, and there shouldn't be any reason why I wouldn't hear back from the employers even just having applied to 10 jobs. If my "email interview" rate is less than 10%, something is wrong anyway.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK...I'm done with everything I was going to do tonight, really. I have a little bit more food to eat, I'm going to try to relax and feel good, hopefully I'll get a good night of sleep without bot interruptions, and I am looking forward to having a peaceful day tomorrow...maybe I'll get a phone interview request since it's Monday, we'll see! I am trying to be optimistic and good-natured.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Some sort of random thoughts: I have started to feel as though I do not like the websites youtube.com or cnn.com visually. I wonder if that is a psychological thing, since I don't use YouTube for modern music any more. I sort of don't like logging in to YouTube sometimes, just because I don't want to have to look at the web design of that website.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I have a pleasant enough day planned for tomorrow. I have decided that I will not be traveling anywhere far until I can get a job. My only work task tomorrow is going to be working on a STEM-based art, writing, and communication idea tomorrow...it should be interesting, even though I really only have an hour set aside for that work, and no time set aside for any other work. (I'll probably have to stock up on groceries again tomorrow.)
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It might be a challenge to find things to do until 2 p.m. when I wake up, since I'm not doing any gaming activities for 3 days. Maybe I should try to think of something to do if I wake up at around 10 or 11, which I probably will. I would want to do something relaxing and low-stress...hmmmm...I don't think I should get involved in doing anything on the internet, and I don't really feel like reading...Shift is a fine novel and I'm some number of chapters into it, but I don't want to keep reading it right now. No gaming, so that basically rules out everything on the computer other than typing, since I said no internet. Hmmm...maybe I could drive somewhere, but I don't want to over do the trips to the mall for walking, 1 or 2 a day seems to be enough. Also, my typical thing to do for now is sort of "act like I haven't woken up until 2" since I am trying to be nice to myself for sleeping better and having woken up early, so I have been typically not eating or showering until 2. I don't think I want to exercise in the mornings...what shall I do? I already told Rosey that I am going to try to space out my visits with her to be only about once every two weeks, which she seemed to approve of, along with my other (perfectly legal to make) disclosures about IC/military technology to her that may help her understand household life better. AFAIK, Rosey understands a lot of English quite well...I think she has some ability to learn words from reading emotional cues, I don't think she understands every single thing I say, but I sort of think she knows how to "prioritize her attention" based on tone-of-voice cues, and I bet she can kind of tell if I'm just saying some sort of "generic 'good girl! what a good puppy!'" kind of thing, and when I'm saying something more content-heavy that she should try to parse the words of. That is just my guess though.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I also do not want to try to watch any TV shows. I think what I should do is some sort of "fun, easy, relaxing, psychological health activity"...something I can just type about and not get too "new STEM heavy" with, but just some sort of simple enough prompt-based idea for thinking of something to say about myself and the interactions I've had in some way that could maybe help my psychological health, particularly in terms of decreasing stress and anxiety and "ghost feelings of upsetness" that I can't explain.. That is probably what I will do tomorrow...I'll probably try to design a prompt for that tonight and write it down on my computer, and then consider doing that tomorrow early on if I'm up early.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Hopefully I can think of something sort of mildly original and different from the usual psych activities I have done in the past.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Yo, I just have to let you know right now...the truth is, I thought of the 'Calculus Man' joke before anyone else, it was my idea. Everything else? It was exchanged for that joke by the creators of Superman. I'll show myself out now."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Something occurred to me this evening...probably, Sasha Burkhoff, whose names sounds like it was selected by her parents to sound like "the perfect name for a well-respected cryptologist," and thus a possible prospect as as NSA recruit as a mentally healthy student who had attended TJHSST in Virginia, had her brain-tumor-caused murder orchestrated initially by pro-life activists. According to my analysis, there is no other reason or group who would do it. I never actually spoke with Sasha, just saw and much later thought to recall a look she gave me when I think she had been diagnosed by the brain tumor, but I didn't have a strong emotional reaction, not that I was unkind or inappropriate about it in any way, but my sense of it is, she sounds like a target of pro-life religious extremists who didn't like TJHSST in general, didn't feel it was worth to murder me--they surely faced counter-attacks, probably including lethal ones, for their actions--since I was set up to be tortured as a math slave for years, and they could only pick out one student to kill to send a message about the NSA and the types of extremist fighters whom they might have felt would work there...in theory...so my sense of it is, even if she was a religious Christian and supported pro-life positions, she might have been targeted for not being "tough enough" on pro-choicer's, like my grandmother, who was kind to me although I am a liberal atheist...she even tried to not speak to me too much when I was physically present in the house, apparently that doesn't suffice for the extremists.. Anyway, it is also certainly possible that Sasha was actively pro-choice. I think my theory is right. Relatedly, probably, Heath Ledger was murdered over some sort of political cause he had supported in a movie before The Dark Knight...I don't know what that would be, but my guess is, judging from Julia Stiles's comments about Ledger and Chrissy Teigen, who emotionally abused and harassed a gay man, according to what I read, he probably supported gay rights much more than actresses like Maggie Gylenhall and Julia Stiles felt comfortable...probably more "pro-choice, that's it, I just say I'm liberal" types.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, I realized that Dr. Kudurogianis was not evil...he is also facing threats, I'm sure, and did the amount of helpful psychiatric work that he felt he would be able to do safely...I think he omitted some "emotional distress" and "employment/socialization" issues due to reasons I would not understand, perhaps related to his safety or something else. I think it is fairly clear that the psychiatric treatment that he did helped me a lot...if I become suspicious that he was actually evil once again, based on me having noticed some detail that I hadn't seen before, I will probably be sure to post my latest theory about that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Great news for people who are on my side! I spent this morning beginning and planning out further work on a "STEM-based system for recovering psychologically from harassment attacks," so that I can use some of my best secret ideas to identify cognitive issues I may be having, including with "inclinations to snap at other angrily," feeling restricted from doing certain things for no good reason, not caring enough and feeling callous about people whom I'm trying to care about and ought to care about, and other issues, and use my competitively excellent ideas to work on "fixing the damage to my mind muscles/processes" so that I can "exercise those muscles" healthily and without pain so that I can get them to be stronger and working properly, as they were in the past and should be for my health and sense of identity/self-concept. Also good news: I think that given local residents' plots to sabotage me psychologically for whatever weird reason, this announcement will demoralize them, and my announcement that it will demoralize them will likely vex them if they want to start up more strange "Wile E. Coyote schemes" to "trick and deceive and psychologically 'hex'" me to feel or perform in a way that is not my best. I.e., I think they will start to realize that their weird and freaky endeavors to mess with me are not a good investment of their time, and they'll sense the regret and unhappiness they will feel later when they see that it didn't work and was all just a frankly pathetic waste of their time, and their movement to bother me will lose enthusiasm.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, my psychology activity for this morning was a big success! I have planned some more work on it to do tomorrow, during my main hours of activity during the day, after 2 p.m.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A comment about this ordeal: I note that there were *very many* people who, in this crisis situation for me, were essentially required to do enough of their part to "give me the password" to get out of trouble. A lot of people refused, in some cases citing right-wing extremist ideology, and in other cases citing threats to them and their families. The thing about the latter situation is, basically, a lot of people "passed the burden" to my family leading to at least two relatives dying, very likely murdered by the CIA, while the other people "wanted to play it safe." I.e., by not doing their jobs, they aggressively and inappropriately passed the "lack of safety burden" from their families to mine, causing damage. Thus, the "right to be outraged and to retaliate" lies with the people who are in my family who are unethical, not with them. Basically, the JACM, Cornell, and Cambridge University in Britain, murdered my grandmother and my uncle, citing, in a sense ,a desire to be safe by virtue of having a good, sustained relationship with political terrorists and mobsters in the CIA, who illegally kill innocent people to seek to pursue their political will.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said "people in my family who are ethical," that's an inserted typo.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Oh, Publix just started discriminating against me today...how original and surprising. I CuRrEnTlY have a very thick skin about this sort of thing, and it doesn't bother me or affect me that much...I will keep shopping there for now while I still live in this dumb area. It's just, "Say goodbye to all your appealing future career possibilities, Publix employees! You don't even know what you are doing professionally, at all, and the double entendre in this sentence is intended!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Regarding my job search...I can see 9 of the jobs I applied to on the panel on the job applications website; the region I applied to is in a different time zone in the USA. I am very qualified, and I applied last Wednesday. I hope I am not being locked out by another tiresome political attack on me for no reason, one that would have pointed at me no matter what I said or did, simply because I am a mentally atheist. Anyway, I only heard back from one employer so far, and they said no to my application. Hopefully I will hear more from the other employers within the next few days...how thoroughly did Donald Trump and his lieutenants seize control of the US job market??! I hope I won't wind up just sitting here, exerting political power by typing out things on Usenet, using new STEM ideas that I have that are under development that bad guys wouldn't understand because they are not able to "crack the code" of the English language! I would really prefer to be an employed private citizen, not an ongoing law-abiding anti-US-government antagonist using cutting edge STEM capabilities to trip up US political agendas pretty much every day! Gosh, I wish I could stop feeling compelled to mess with with the USA's secretly right-wing extremist, anti-Semitic, anti-Muslim, anti-atheist government for a week or two!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The US Democratic Party has never before been forced to negotiate a full, unconditional "political surrender" to anyone, have they? Well, if I'm still here in a couple months, you'll all get to find out that feels. Imagine an America with *NO LIBERALISM WHATSOEVER.* Are you excited to live in that world? Is that what you are voting for by denying my rights, or would you like to delude yourselves and side with Biden? Indeed, I *couldn't* convince the Democrats to stop hurting or be reasonable...I can't educate them on how to be smart and rational, all I can do is destroy everything everything they ever fought for, for me because I like me and I think my life and rights matter, and then keep attacking everyone, ruining everything they've gotten and fought for over the years, until they have nothing left and realize how dumb they were.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Would you be gentler in some way if I did what you did to me to one of you? No! You are doing things to me, and I haven't committed *one* crime against any of you or any of your backers. If I had eagerly served you and gotten nothing in returned, you would have tried to Auschwitz me anyway, and would not have backed no matter what. Get ready to see where this path with leads, I'm now apparently about to be your tour guide to a whole new America that you will not recognize and not like, because it will have been politically completely re-shaped by me with cutting edge science ideas, unless I am able to not face discrimination during my job search. How much is it worth to you? Did you, "everything?" Hint: Yes, and you're right! That's what it will cost. You're already paying a large percentage of the total possible cost, do you want to increase that or decrease that?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Basically, my failure was, I thought the US leaders were self-interested and smart. I thought they would be smart enough and not crazy, and would let me have my rights and let me go. I guess they are not that smart, and insist on being pummeled some more. Either that, or I'm gong to be getting interviewed sometime this week that's for sure.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Basically, at this point, if you have been a bad guy linked to the team of people who are homicidally stalking me, if you are not done with me by the end of this week and I am not actively interviewing for jobs, you will soon be done enjoying any benefits of American liberalism, period. I have the power to do that, no one else does. Did you miss what happened to Build Back Better, abortion rights, the US military's power, Biden's approval ratings, Democratic control of Congress, and even Donald Trump being used as a threat or having a viable candidacy, due to my use of my STEM powers and the US government's failure to heed my protest on behalf of my basic Constitutional rights? In that case, I even *told you fools* *exactly* what I was doing, STEM-wise. Next time, it will be a different set of excellent capabilities, and I will not tell you a think about what I'm doing, it will devastate Democrats politically, you won't be able to guess what I'm doing with algorithms or anything else, and it will all be perfectly legitimate and in accordance with the rules. Now let me go or face the consequences!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I did a great job on my STEM research task today...things are coming along extremely well, and my work is even more fun than usual. I have more such work to do tomorrow.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Regarding the conflict: To say it again another way: The clear and repeated and persistent, un-American argument of my opponents who think I should be caged and not allowed to socialize, date, or have a job, is: "We have every right to ignore the separation of church and state and freedom of religion in the US Constitution, because we would prefer to view atheists as cattle, with worthless lives, whom the government has the right to slaughter or try to slaughter, without any respect for their rights or feelings, at any time that we choose, with no regard for any laws. We may also slaughter people like cattle that we see as 'failing to dehumanize atheists' and being too friendly with them.." That is the kind of extremist you've signed up to support if you're backing Biden and his cronies. You don't want to go there, it's roughly the same thing as anti-Semitism.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A couple of developments:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 1 - It looks like the mall has changed its hours, and now it closes at 7 p.m. I don't think it used to...I wonder if the Christian church that meets in two of the store-type areas had something to do with the change, to make a statement about me?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 2 - It occurred to me this evening that some time ago, someone credible hinted to me that I was likely being considered for the position of Secretary of Defense some time ago. I might have been the youngest one if my various promotions and career achievements hadn't been sabotaged! It is probably a good idea for me to mention this at this time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A dramatic reflection on my recent learning endeavors:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Ze codes, Mr. Vite. Ze codes! Now you see...velcome to schizophrenia, ze codes, zey make you genius!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I seem to be mostly out of jokes though. Remember when I said--rapped, rather:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "If I say things are like things and express opinion
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Each booty babe will fail to not become my minion"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ...remember when that seemed like it was going to be true?? What happened????!! All those comedic rap songs, and all I got was...uh...deniably video messaged by Zara Larsson and then blocked. Step up to the plate, yo! You only live once, and there's only one me. My arrogance, like so much else, knows no bounds...just as it is with my physics knowledge, I'm one of a kind! Now, in a space-time continuum sense, it is all women in the USA who are desperate, deep down, maybe unconsciously, to meet me, and not the other way around! Again, it's like Linkin Park always envisioned for me: "So [he's] waitin' until the upper hand is [his]....". Don't disrespect the prophecy, yo!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Would that I could calibrate my jokes to be funnier, for the perfect audience...forsooth.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (Yes, this again.)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, I do not actually know if Zara Larsson is a Nazi who supports murdering me for being an atheist. I wrote above assuming she was not.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, regarding the Richard Dawkins Tweet: Here is a really good idea; I would think that every single US citizen who is currently residing in the US, has heard of me or met me and heard what happened to me, is alive and feeling well, and never supported right-wing extremism, and didn't get a chance to get in touch when I demanded to be contacted between Sept 2020 and the present, ought to send me an email, at least wishing me well, maybe offering to see if there is anything such a person could do to help me, given that I will have basically just gotten out of a de facto American (??!) concentration camp.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The obvious question about why any such person who would read this and then not get in touch with me is, "Why not?," and it would tend to suggest that such a person, given my insistence and biography and status as a virtuous bipolar American atheist, would either feel "extremely threatened by a still-tyrannical US government," or, more likely, would be a "radicalized right-wing extremist residing in America who supports ethnic cleanings operations, against the mentally ill, against atheists, and against black people residing in Africa." Otherwise, why wouldn't such a person at least send a quick email checking it? It would seem to suggest some sort of "mass radicalization epidemic" that hit the USA, that would have hit the people who refused to contact me, and that there is indeed, as Fox News suggested when speaking of a "silent majority," that a very large number of people in the USA have apparently converted to fascism. Otherwise, I would receive at least a quick "glad you're feeling better' email for sure, from everyone who had heard of me, given that I would be like Anne Frank if she had managed to just finish escaping from a Nazi concentration camp...surely all of the people who wished her well and didn't support her being tortured and murdered by Nazis would want to send her an email congratulating her on her escape and wishing her well? There could be no other explanation, of course.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK, so I am going to go to bed soon. I am pleased that, looking at the text I've written and the lack of any coherent response to it or accusation from government officials or anyone else with authority, it is clear that it has been clear, for months now, that I am totally and 100% a victim of right-wing extremists in government and beyond...I am not a bad guy and never deserved this. So that is good.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, my science projects are going well. I am feeling a little bit mildly restless at night--it is hard to tell how much of that is due to the wake-ups from the government-linked bad guys--but mostly I feel fine each day. Just bored, ready for things to change so that I can get out of here and have a real, normal life as I and other innocent people deserve to have. I am one of the smartest and most talented people in the world now, so in spite of my set backs, I am a fairly fortunate person in terms of talent and long-term (decades-type term) outcome...I'm sure I'll be doing great in my 40's, I'll just be a little bit older and past my prime physically. Mentally, I'll surely still be the best theorem prover in the world, and that will be the source of my talent, which I'll be sure to stockpile and keep to myself.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So...I am trying to think of ways to relax at night. I looked at the YouTube videos again, and in spite of my different viewing choices, they are all completely *useless*, the recommendations totally suck and it is unpleasant even looking at the thumbnails on the main page. Now that I'm avoiding Twitter due to discrimination, I am starting to feel like groups.google.com is the only site I ever want to visit, except for maybe checking my email accounts on Yahoo and Gmail, and also occasionally glancing at cnn.com, which is also a crap website, but I ought to know a few of the top headlines that are not being covered up at any given time. So yeah. I am finding writing in my offline files to be more productive and interesting than anything there is to do online. I like typing in my offline files and walking, and eating, and I wish I could socialize and date and maybe have sex. Other than that, I'm not all that limited...I can't do work for money yet, perhaps due to government limitations, but I can still exert more political and other power than anyone else in the world...I'll have all my latest ideas set up and ready to use soon, and I'll just type what I want to type on Usenet, and see how that goes. It should have an impact, and again, it won't be unethical or against the law...I'll be sure. So my "job," coming soon if I'm not released or employed, will be writing appropriate STEM-backed posts, in captivity, on the internet to continue to exert my political will on the world. I should be allowed to socialize and friends--I'm a perfectly nice and quite normal person, I follow the rules, don't do anything wrong, just file complaints about the epidemic of weirdos bothering me and never start fights, always do the right thing, never do any weird or creepy/strange things to other people like try to "scare them" or follow them around or harass them, always behave appropriately and like I should. Anyway, I'll see where this ends pretty soon I'm sure...the bad guys, I don't think, can take many more losses...I mean they can, but they really wouldn't look like they are even employed if they keep pushing with this, I don't get how such high-power leaders of the US, in such a competitive field, can be so completely stupid, irrational, nakedly and publicly pro-extremism and pro-terrorism, and able to still maintain approval ratings of about 30%. I admit, I'm quite stunned by that capability...how can such incompetent figure out a way to keep their jobs without ever doing them, how on earth do they do that? I'm not jealous and don't want to copy that, but the example is stunning and interesting in its own right, like Caligula's success as a Roman leader.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Once again, I am thinking some more about Richard Dawkins' Tweet. Liar drops R; maybe that means, Joe Biden drops Regency Mall, without the monolith, i.e., I will get hired based on the region I correctly applied to. If so, great! That will be excellent. My usual "Donkey Kong dance," not that I think mentally ill people should be considered apes, but I'm thinking of the "aggressive impactful stomping" of sorts, before big event relevant to me that might be sabotaged that may require a "vocally aggressive send-off to the immediate predecessor time" just before the full result is in, to pre-attack in case I've been "foiled again by a pinball-tilt wizard with no ethics or sense of 'gosh, that was too much, enough is enough,'" is basically contained above in some of the writing. I basically always do that, in this situation where I post a lot in public, right before I think that something big and important I'm working towards is about to possibly be sabotaged into not working right again, based on an initial "bad sign," which just be an incidental thing and nothing to worry about over all.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I'm thinking maybe I will get a job. I hope so. I'm going to turn the computer off pretty soon and get more fully ready to fall asleep.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, I am a little bit worried about: the guy with the bald head who used to also walk on Quioccasin Road who I think was mentally ill, Kristen, who sometimes walked on Quioccasin Road and seemed to have disappeared recently, and the guy that I saw who was black who seemed like he was mentally ill on Quioccasin, and the white guy who looked like he liked to wear military camouflage type of clothing and a hat whom I would see on Quioccasin road...there was also the black guy that I called "nodding head man" who used to bother me, he might have been mentally ill, and maybe I shouldn't blame him for having bothered me by nodding his fast when I was very much more sensitive and messed up due, I think, to trauma-related mental illness. Is anyone going to help them if they are still in trouble and not where they want to be in life yet? They looked like they were totally shunned by the local community and very under-supported, if they did indeed have mental health problems...probably they weren't even all identifying as atheists. I hope that my "monolith" will be their "monolith," too, i.e., that they will be able to get out of isolation, if they're in isolation in the Tuckahoe area and not already out of isolation.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A couple more comments:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Yeah I trained my "inner word-fighter persona" in melee combat with Ras al CVS. I stole the power to be extremely rude, with or without a reason of any sort.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - This morning, I noticed that my neck and shoulders felt a little weird and sort of sore, like it would feel comfortable to rest my head by tilting it to the right, like I was Stephen Hawking who was paralyzed and had his head looking like it was at an angle in his wheelchair, at least that was my perception...maybe it was not actually at much of an angle, checking the photos on Google briefly. It sounds like a nasty joke about me and atheists and highly competent STEM people, and I received a credible psych hint about the government-linked gesture doing this, suggesting that it is not a total surprise, perhaps, and a psych professional somewhere knew that a gesture of this nature would be done at some point, and maybe the perpetrator's psychological state and behavior are not necessarily hard to explain or predict, to an extent, at all. Yes, there is probably something psychological to be learned from my own initial explorations into basic amateur psychology...what did I reach for first, how is my "first-choice" lens to reach for characterized? Whatever. I'm mainly pivoting back to "easy psych ideas," just because my psych "research," amateur and not valuable/competitive or not, is mainly just to help me improve my own health for now, not to win any "innovative psychology research contests" or anything along those lines. I'm more interested in competing, vaguely speaking, at "applied math that I can use to get ahead at almost anything performance-related," in a variety of different contexts.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Remember: It is the lives of Nazis and other intolerant right-wing extremists that are worthless, not the lives of the people that they target and despise.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > youtube.com/watch?v=C9SiRNibD14&embeds_euri=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2F&source_ve_path=MjM4NTE&feature=emb_title
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yes, this video is sad. Science is a good thing--the means to power, health, safety, technological progress, and often prosperity.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, it is concerning that this woman from Africa is trying to like Newton's scientific achievements with colonization. There is no evidence that science is linked to discrimination or exploitation of minority groups or people outside of the US.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A concern is that many people would argue that people who want to support colonizing or otherwise support exploiting Africa ought to be killed, i.e., if it is not illegal in your country to kill someone who wants to support fascism or slavery-like activities, then it would not be a bad idea to kill that person, like killing a Confederate or Nazi soldier in battle; the lives of confirmed fascists are worthless, and within the constraints of US law in America, ought to be either imprisoned, killed, or otherwise removed from relevance and ideally prosperity, as soon as possible. That goes for anyone who wants to eliminate some or all people from a particular legitimate background as though they had no rights, whether the background is ethnic, religious, or something else not related to "being an evil predatory fascist."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I am hoping that she does not mean that she thinks that pro-science people should be killed. Sadly, if she adopted such a position and pushed for it, she would put herself into a very bad category. I am speaking about this because I believe that people in Africa, who may have been denied some Western educational benefits, deserve more of a chance to turn around mistaken behavior and not support hurting pro-science people, including science-interested students in school who might not thrive without education...although that is different from wanting "pro-science people killed," and she didn't say that she wanted that, I am just worried about the claimed connection between colonialism and science.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My point is that people who support murder and fascism become, after a certain possible grace period of controversial length, people with worthless lives. Most people who fought for Naziism in WW2 ought not be given a chance to "tell everyone they're sorry and repent," that's good enough. There are some fascists from different parts of history that should not be allowed out of jail for 500 years. I still oppose the death penalty avidly, but any person who converts to fascism, while not losing his or her rights as a possibly accused criminal person or not, loses the "desirability of their existence," although it might be illegal to kill them without a trial.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So my point is, do not ever join forces with fascists, no matter what opinions you may have about people from backgrounds other than your own--you may champion your beliefs and backgrounds, but never support the denial of rights or the denial of desirability of other people being alive, unless such people are fascists, i.e., people who themselves deny the desirability of being alive to others over a mere beliefs-based disagreement that does involve calling for the deaths of innocent, "maybe just wrong" people, as opposed to true fascists.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said, "that's not good enough."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Someone outside signaled me to "see Bill Gates," so I did.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > What is he saying? "PW aim [is getting close with] the world" ? What, now for the first time? Is this some sort of reverse psychology trick?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Why didn't Microsoft offer to hire me, since it understood my talent all along?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My aim is to have my own life, withhold my STEM talents as punishment for the "slavery and extraction" initiative that political terrorists backed, presumably because they didn't want me to get big at DOD because criminals in STEM business, like Zuckerberg and possibly also Gates--I don't know--might fear my rules-based leadership and top-notch talent at STEM. I also want to help Africa. Is there some sort of claim that I have been inconsistent in anything I said?? Is it claimed that my chemistry disclosure, related to BQP = P and disease cures, somehow does *not* cure cancer?? Please, check with an expert who still trusts you, if you can find one! I am definitely no longer "crank" by any measure, and I never was one, just somewhat ignorant about classical mechanics and other areas of physics--I had been quite behind on studying, now I am not--I don't have a deep understanding of relativity, general or special, but I get the very basics of QM, and I understand classical mechanics well.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Bill Gates must not smear me, or risk being seen as "just another big-money-man cheater who fought his way to the top, became 'a king of having money,' and added no value to the world," just as the excellent researcher and publisher CS Christos Papadimitriou seems to have predicted, sort of.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I *will* help Africa if I can make the money. Why wouldn't I? Is it claimed that I cannot, that I don't have the will to spend money on such things? Does Gates actually believe that a condition for my freedom, as a brilliant, totally innocent atheist who is much better at math, CS, and engineering than he is, even as a top-ranked business leader, is that I must "serve the world" with my STEM talents, publishing free "naked photos of all the things that make me powerful," so that he can make money from them and not I? I've given more than enough free STEM gifts to the world, it is time for me to be *compensated* for my work, and also, well past time for me to be liberated--unlike Gates, I've never been credibly accused of committing a serious crime.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe Gates is questioning why I have lost interest in STEM. Oh, is he pretending that he doesn't know a certain fact about computers, or does he actually not know?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, if Gates is not a fascist or homicidal criminal at least, I *demand* his full support for my release. He should have offered to buy my IP, but not being a likely candidate for being ethical, he probably would never do that. I have nothing to fear from a "lacking Bill Gates like" as long as I do not work as a STEM worker in the STEM industry; his "like" is irrelevant in my new chosen field.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A question about the local community:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Are most citizens in the Tuckahoe area *actually* claiming that they "don't really have free speech rights or the right to peaceably assemble near me," or is that another fake-out attempt? If they believe that, do they accept that, and is their defense against further curtailments against their rights, due to their crimes, that "no one has the capability to do anything to us, so we're just going to keep doing our way?" I think that attitude will not get a good outcome; no one wants to tell you how certain techniques for dealing with "right-wing bad guy daredevils" are sometimes used to fight back.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Whatever that other post says on my thread, I am not reading it.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, the Little League tragedy of today is, Publix once again was deliberately out of YoCrunch (they claimed credit for it yesterday). Clearly, there is only one question about this situation: Will I, or will I not, get into volunteer "Retail Rap" under the rapper name, "Cashier Fatherf---er For Fun," and how many cashier careers will I mercilessly ruin with the awesome power of the pen?? IS there a limit to how much damage I can enjoy myself while sustaining it and waiting for whatever to happen? Who knew hurting bad-guy people's lives could be so fun???
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yo, I gotta start right there, I can't just leave that hanging, yo....
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > UNTITLED RAP
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > by Cashier Fatherf---er For Fun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yo, my name is Manheim, they think they're Julia Right
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > A Stiles motherpredecessor, ring it up as a fight, yo...
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > I can't delete losers as fast as I shop, but
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > I would compete to get losers' heads on a justice chopping block
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > You know, I am an artist--my words are OK--because, I
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Fight relentlessly to just prove I'm still not gay, because I
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Am gay deep down, unless it's a statement to show, that
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm not intimidated by deletions of Yo-
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Crunch, um, you knew that was coming 'cause I rap about me
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > I channel adrenaline and I charge a fee, you see
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > The metaphorical gun flash but you think there's no gun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > And yeah, it's just a metaphor, I smoked you for fun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > [begin snare]
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm not Obama--I just snort Confederates when stuck on an island
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > If I write aggressive raps and die will they scream, "Oh, why, man??!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Does anyone miss anyone without a new rap atmosphere?--no.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > I thought I proved to them my strength is from being non-sex-queer, though.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quirky adrenaline, you'll never trace it down, guys
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > I spurt technologies, and you lose blood like dead flies
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > You sign up for death and more death and I'm totally blameless
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > I thought He'd cancel you, but everyone's shameless.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > [guitar solo]
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > I need an outro that returns to the central
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Theme of my rap which is that you are all no-go's
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > I use that word and not the p-slur--I'm perfect
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Still bag the groceries miss, your life is now worthless.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > That's my rap song! What do you think? I feel comfortable asserting that viciously insulting intransigent law breaker cashiers is not harassment or stalking, as long as I don't name names or say anything directly in public. I have a right to make political speech, in the form of art, whether your like it or not. A lot of people are saying that they hate me for stupid reasons, why not get more insulting, see if they like it more? Maybe some professional rapper will come out and say how much they hate me too, I'll be sure to quiver. Also, I'm still under duress, as anyone can see! The hate-fueled nightmare is supposed to never end according to them, I don't have to persuade you, if you don't know how to think, it's your graves, Confederacy punks! Fascists always lose! Don't delude yourselves about exactly what you are! Note, retail work is fine, if you do it WITHOUT trying to intimidate, harass, gaslight, or discriminate against people.. Let's see how juiced up Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren will get this time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > That was fun. Now on to other things.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Yeah that's right I was actually mean, once. What!!!!!
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > No I am not going to publish any new STEM ideas to help the military or other goons. I'm immune to all manipulative tricks, I'm done outputting STEM, forever, you're on your own, losers.
> > > > > > > > > > > > I'm starting to worry that Biden shut down my job search in another state, too. The job was one I was extremely qualified for, and I still haven't heard anything positive from any of the jobs I applied to.
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > So...do all geographic regions in the USA support the idea that Biden is completely control of law-abiding, intelligent religious minorities' members being able to get a job, literally anywhere? Can Biden shut down good career moves for any atheist in the USA? I suspect that the answer is yes, and no one will talk about it...I hope something really nasty and permanent happens to the people who are making sleazy deals of this nature, in clear support of anti-atheist fascism.
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway...I don't know what to do next, I have fought and worked as hard as almost anyone ever could, but just as Einstein would have trouble getting out of a concentration camp if he had stayed in Germany for too long, all my talents and work and digging deep, and really exerting myself to try to look out for myself and exercise my legal rights and get a good job have thwarted by vastly populated legions, sadly, of American right-wing extremists. They are not being challenged enough, they have largely taken over the economy of the country, and contrary to my initial belief, it looks like they do not merely control STEM and retail.
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > FYI, I am not saying it is a Jewish conspiracy, in case someone thinks that I sound like some sort of bad guy who is claiming that "Jews are trying to control everything." It is not Jewish people, it is American political crooks. WHEN will they cut this out? It has been almost 12 years, I tried asking nicely and appealing to reason and the evidence and my innocence, I tried demonstrations of my STEM talent and was just smeared (e.g., with the Hodge Conjecture, my logic result, the twin prime conjecture, etc.), I finally resorted to aggressively attacking the fascist leaders who are perpetrating this...what am I supposed to do? What is any person in my position, being innocent and just mentally ill and an atheist, supposed to do to get away from extra-judicial assaults and "containment efforts" made against by government-employed fascists?? Someone is supposed to fix this! I could warn of the consequences--some of them have already been faced--but I am growing tired of that. Don't try to convert the USA to a racist dictatorship, that is not good for anyone. Leave me alone and let me work!!! Fascists deserve death, not liberals!
> > > > > > > > > > > I just realized something: The government still thinks it's going to use "stress" and "psychological manipulation" to manipulate my mood and feelings, and put me in great distress--probably with a few more "false hope" things, then "choking incidents," then "weird and confusing signals that seem to be about something important...but what are they really saying?", and try to manipulate me into changing my mind into publishing more STEM.
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > In the past, I definitely changed my mind about publishing differential equations--I thought it would help, and it probably did....it probably ended the US's ability to be a navy and air force superpower, basically permanently, unless more help would be provided by me.
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > I do not share things at random. I try to do what is in my interests, whether I'm stressed out and desperate (I probably won't be in the near future at all) or not. I have done a really good job on working on being able to relax. I AM NOT GOING TO PUBLISH ANY MORE STEM. I made sure, after I changed my mind on diff eq publication, to also change my mind and "declare law-abiding war on the US Department of Defense," and I did that, and I won...I tossed them a breakable code using BPP = P, and they can use it, but it doesn't matter--all their secret things were lost to their adversaries via flight surveillance and cryptology during the no-codes phase.
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > I won the war on DOD, they just want to deny it, and now shower THEMSELVES with false hope and optimism, thinking that they are "such great Christian guys, of COURSE they'll get it back, the US NEVER loses like this," precisely because the US has never been this morally wrong-headed or right-wing and extremist before; the US declared war on terrorism in 2001, and thus itself in the near future--today.
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > I WILL NEVER PUBLISH MORE STEM TO HELP THE GOVERNMENT FOR ANY OTHER REASON. It is over, I am keeping it to myself to fuel other endeavors, I am *never* going to try to help *anyone*, other than my own children, with STEM sharing or explanation efforts, EVER AGAIN.
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > Maybe that will clarify some things.
> > > > > > > > > > My day today was fairly pleasant. I had to go to Food Lion to get YoCrunch because Publix still wouldn't stock it...whatever. I will probably write more "rather absurd rap songs" to exercise my sense of humor, since I can't even talk right now, but I'll probably be more light-hearted and less mean in the future.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Somewhat disappointingly, my schedule for my day tomorrow is basically exactly the same as my schedule for today. I worked for more than an hour on my math research task today, which was great and yielded some good ideas. I am still continuing the same research tomorrow, and I might do it for at most 2 more days before I move on. I am only doing real work for 1-2 hours a day right now, and I'm still on my gaming break. I might stay on that, unless I get more headaches soon.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > I am starting to think that the end of this will have nothing to do with getting the job I was trying to get from the job search. Do I have to wait for the government to relent? What about waiting for the wildly nutty local citizens to relent? I don't see what they are thinking or afraid of or doing, why are they *all* *still* siding with fascist ideologies, do they think they will get some sort of warmth and protection from that? That is not a good move, side with the truth, good values, patriotism, the US Constitution, and me, not code-talking terrorist linked insider threat bad guys who "have a job in the government." I had a job in the government, let me tell you, that helps you 0% with law enforcement, whether you mention it or not, if you get arrested or TDO'd (I have never been arrested, but I have been TDO'd, twice by police, sometimes even improperly, shortly after quitting jobs as an NSA contractor...it changes nothing, which is how it is supposed to work). I.e., even if you think you have power from a government position and try to abuse it, the police will just ignore that. It's just a job, it's not a magical "becoming a king or queen" ceremony, you really shouldn't see government employees as "larger than life," they're mostly very inefficient and ineffective at getting things done at the office.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > So anyway...I am trying to be calm, since it's getting late. I am trying to relax and not vent any more angry feelings or "creative interpretations for debate/persuasion/etc." about this nonsense. I wonder what it will take for me to be spoken to again? I don't know. I might take a break from all work pretty soon, but then I wouldn't know what to do with all my time.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Yeah, I wonder what the end of this will look like. Which will happen first? Will local residents come to their senses and stop backing fascists and code-talking liars? Will I get a job? Will someone from another state or another country write to me? Will the DOD write to me to apologize for their huge mistake/crime? Will the news run a story forcing a bad US political leader to resign, decreasing interest in this "project?" I don't know, but I've waited for over a decade for justice and access to my Constitutional rights!! What a farce, I don't know for sure what exactly these people are thinking.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I'm going to try to have a pleasant night.
> > > > > > > > > So, now that night-time is here, I note I would probably feel more relaxed if I typed something relaxing. Who knows why. I should be high-energy and full of comments and ideas and even a little bit of aggression during the day--I just remembered that I said I was going to stop being aggressive, but it is sometimes hard to remember all the different changes I wanted to make to improve my psych health, it's not that important that I stick to that, it is just important that I never publish STEM again.
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > Anyway, I think the "monolith" is: Regency Mall drops Regency, i.e., when the local mall loses its administrative authority given to it on behalf of a monarch. What authority is that? What exactly can they do? I think Dawkins' subsequent comment, which came out to "clatter lordie," suggests that the Christian church there got investigated for extremism after my comment...I did see a little bit of evidence of that, some man inside one of their areas made a sort-of Nazi salute gesture at me, I mainly just ignored that, that sort of thing is pretty common around here.
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > Maybe I should disclose more strange mall activity?...they keep sending groups of young men with one overweight chesty woman by to say things, the group today yelled "penis" when I looked at them, and the woman made eye contact with me and said something like "bye bye Kyle," which is the first name of a male patient at Dominion Hospital that I went to see Dr. Steg in 2001. Maybe it helps to repeat these things, I don't know. I heard some other man say "bye Felicia" loudly a while ago, a number of days ago, at the mall. I heard a woman who looked pretty and might have been Hispanic talking on the phone, near the "escape rooms" thing with her group of friends, and I heard her say, "I have a reservation" over the phone, perhaps she was from out of town.
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > Last time with the overweight chesty woman, the code was something like "a cost" then "most sag" and then the code had like "two sniffles" after that, I don't know what they were trying to say. Whatever, I don't get the point or message of what they're trying to do, it sounds unfriendly. I saw a group of teenagers coming by, and they made some sort of like aggressive gesture while looking at me, like, "WHAT?!", and I didn't pay that much attention to them.
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > There was a large group of people singing in the Christian church area a few days ago. Today, a black man in a Harvard sweatshirt came out of the bottom of the elevator, holding a staff or stick or whatever. Today, I saw a security guy on one of those electronic rolling segue thing, making some sort of gesture. I saw a guy like that working for security before; he did that when I first started walking there, then the next a different security guy started quickly shaking his head at me, then I complained, then there were two security workers sitting at a desk, and one of them sort of "put their hands up," a lot like one of the female workers at Food Lion did one time. I don't know the gang codes at all, I'm just posting to maybe help "drop the regency of Regency Mall," maybe it will work!
> > > > > > > > Actually, no, DOS, "roboticdeepthroatconditioning.mil" is not a good idea for a web-based app for your upcoming startup. Get a little more creative, there actually are some fascists out there who are even better at thinking and science than you.
> > > > > > > Rap About Walking In the RVA Area, Etc.
> > > > > > > by Broom Philip
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > I've got to find a place to walk every day
> > > > > > > The FBI is like shut down, so criminals may
> > > > > > > Do what they want to do whenever they want
> > > > > > > Follow me through shopping malls, grocery stores, and Deep Run Park
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > So I am writing a rap to kill some time, you know
> > > > > > > I see the anarchists have killed fighting crime, and so
> > > > > > > My free time's spent on research food and health
> > > > > > > While the world is acting like it's favored by stealth
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > They think the secret spies stalk their enemies better
> > > > > > > If they can't see it, they think, it makes women wetter
> > > > > > > The movie-like atmosphere of intriguing spy pirates
> > > > > > > Is, they think, the beauty of all violence in silence
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > The rap is weak today 'cause it's just a drill
> > > > > > > You'd rather have just me and not the FBI chill, but
> > > > > > > Indeed you wanted Sin City but got Gotham instead
> > > > > > > You think you're safest when your eyes are closed in bed
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > My self-expression requires no apology, now
> > > > > > > They changed god to mysteriousness in their brand new theology, now
> > > > > > > The Christian church no longer has its true savior
> > > > > > > And, they think forgiveness green lights every behavior.
> > > > > > Here is my latest prediction of how it will end: On March 14 or so, 18 days after Dawkins' Tweet, Biden has predicted in public in code that Vladimir Putin will be killed by a US-linked drone strike, and then Biden's approval ratings will go up and he'll look more likely to win the 2024 election. The truth is, though, the capabilities to be dominant, air-force-wise, over Russia have been removed for the US; they cannot possibly have the power to do that sort of assassination any more--no country has that kind of power any more, at least not over the top developed nations with the GDP to support "the standard air force." Perhaps the bad guys will finally drop me and admit assaulting me wasn't worth it, even taking morality out of the equation. *Hopefully* they will regain a sliver of their sanity.
> > > > > Update regarding my job search: I think I did apply to the right region--a place that is not against, e.g., LGBTQ people--and I think that there are firms that would like to reach out to me. My guess is, some political group essentially made "huge threats" against the firms that seemed likely to communicate with me, and there is a "brief pause for a battle," that the employers will win. So far, none of the 10 or so firms I applied to have written back except one...I bet they will, and it will just take a while, due to political pressure, which one of the firms even says it does not value above equal opportunity, even in cases of stalking.
> > > > A comment on an excerpt from the article linked to on Richard Dawkins' Twitter:
> > > >
> > > > https://www.spectator.co.uk/article/who-really-discovered-dnas-structure/
> > > >
> > > > "This is a story replete with competition, friction, misunderstanding and some sexism, but it lacks anything truly unethical, let alone criminal. Four men and one woman, none of whom was perfect ... "
> > > >
> > > > What? "...it lacks anything truly unethical..." ??! How exactly can one claim that refusing to cite someone else's research contribution, particularly when there was a huge breakthrough with big incentivized possibilities on the table, not being cited is not unethical?? I believe they were truly paying attention, and got press and thus an opportunity to correct themselves...it is very unethical to fail to cite research contributions, unless it is an accident and, once this is pointed out, a full and profuse apology is made by the non-citers. Researchers, including me, very often do not get paid anything beyond, in the cases of Ph.D. professors, "acceptable satisfaction of publishing requirements" to keep their jobs--I don't know if there are raise calculations involved--and so it is very important to cite research and things that contribute to research whenever a publication is done. I try to do so even informally when, in the past, I published things on the internet.
> > > I also watched the first three minutes of this:
> > >
> > > https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E3bLSePqCvc&feature=youtu.be
> > >
> > > Interestingly, I didn't know about natural selection before I was in middle school myself...it is interesting to think about different education curriculums in different countries. I think I got better at understanding it in 9th grade. Also, I was very interested in genetic algorithms in college...before I figured out how to actually solve the discrete logarithm problem, one of my early attempts was based on genetic algorithms.
> > >
> > > One way to view the idea of evolution speed--since you might wonder, with respect to what metric or dimension are you defining speed, or change with time?--is to think about some way to formalize the idea of "changes to the 'fitness function'" in a collection of evolving entities over generations.
> > >
> > > You could argue that breeding is likely to bring about "very large changes to the minimum Hamming distance between possible binary Turing machine indexes that could be used to represent each fitness function." I don't actually know that much about biological evolution--is it just the genetic code that evolves and mutates, or is there more to it than that??--but I think my idea is good.
> > >
> > > Just so you know, I count that as "discussion of STEM ideas," not publication of anything truly new or revolutionary. I.e., I am talking about something I know in STEM, not trying to "serve anyone" with more valuable research disclosures.
> > An amusing thing I just realized: It is almost certainly true that Abigail Spanberger has actually *never* worked for the CIA, and made up the whole claim to bolster career as a political leader. It sounds like she did not get a job there...I realized that there is something that she would definitely know if she had successfully obtained a TS/SCI clearance at that particular agency. It's actually quite funny.
> I just realized that Stephen Cook and probably Kaveh Ghasemloo are probably good guys, and that Neil Immerman, although he proved P = NP in the 1980's, and Michael Sipser are likely bad guys who supported trafficking me. Timothy Chow is of course also bad. It would also appear that Sara More, the professor who gave a talk to the math department introducing me to the discrete logarithm problem, was also actually a bad guy all along, although that talk did influence me in a good way and launch my research career. All of the UMW professors, including math and CS professors, and all of the UVA professors that I briefly saw at an engineering building there when I took the GREs, which might have had my score modified by the bot, were all evil and supportive of the bad-guy government efforts to surveil and enslave and torture me, too. Additionally, all of the psych and other doctors I saw outside of Dr. Steg were evil, before I saw Dr. K, including Welton and others...basically, I won't say how I know but it is not illegal for me to say it, all of them would have *tried* to get in touch with me if they hadn't supported trafficking and torturing me, like the child predators that they all always were, and I would have found out about the effort...I am now at a point where I can *prove* that they were bad guys felons who were against me, but I refuse to say how i know.
>
> So that is my update for now.

On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:52:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:43:16 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:25:33 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 4:44:00 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 4:35:29 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 2:06:33 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 12:18:11 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 11:48:48 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:00:40 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 10:15:18 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 9:40:36 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 9:07:21 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 8:11:18 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 7:48:21 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 7:38:38 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 4:14:31 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 3:33:40 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:59:36 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:56:42 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 10:50:01 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 12:30:35 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 12:03:27 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 11:33:28 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 10:40:48 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 9:50:02 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 9:45:56 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 7:29:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 6:38:09 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 5:07:15 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:41:22 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:40:14 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:31:28 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:24:38 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 2:29:02 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 2:25:34 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 1:40:22 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 12:14:30 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 12:05:02 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 11:52:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 10:34:20 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:54:20 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:12:54 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:08:43 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 7:03:13 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 7:00:27 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 2:39:55 PM UTC-5, B.H. wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 12:44:04 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, February 25, 2023 at 11:15:19 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ...the bot shot down my post again, but I thought to copy it before I posted it, so I can still paste it below:
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just had a totally great idea just now! I was reflecting on the fact that I recently devise two very excellent STEM-based ideas for figuring out how to predict the stock market. I also have devised some great STEM-based ideas for how to communicate well, especially in writing....that project of devising more such ideas is ongoing.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Then, it occurred to me, based on some of my notes about my recent chess games: I could get into using STEM ideas to analyze and especially improve my performance at chess and running.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I decided to go back to Deep Run Park to start doing at least a little bit of running, now without music, starting tomorrow. I will still walk at the mall, because I don't find walking at DRP to be relaxing given all the weird people who show up there. Anyway, that is my new plan for what to do with my time now...I have been feeling fine, did well today, and felt less restricted and more "able to not have to be 'calming down' at night to feel OK," than I had felt in the past. The bot choking affected me only minimally, my mood was still much better than it had been in the 2 weeks preceding.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, that is my update for now. I feel a little unhappy that I am probably going to be known only as a writer, and not a science publisher, but think that is the right decision for me. I will get credit for writing, and I might branch into "persuasive/quasi-political non-fiction," as opposed to "here-you-go-America-free-service" non-fiction, as I was sort of thinking of doing at first. I really doubt I will change my mind, the decision, which seems quite right, is still just slowly sinking in...I am very likely to be a writer, full-time, and pour my STEM ideas into that, not any "sharing of secret family-enabling math ideas."
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I will get more used to the idea and enthusiastic about it after it has been sinking in for a few days or weeks.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > After reviewing my job applications again, I am ready to say that I'm cautiously optimistic that I will get a job. I am not sure, but I am eagerly anticipating hearing back from one or more of the employers that I applied to in this next upcoming week.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Today, I'm going to do my usual things--not really start in until 2, although it's kind of boring to just do nothing for so many hours when I keep waking up at around 10 or so...I woke up in the middle of the night last night with a very fast heart rate, but it settled down and was fine, it's probably related to past bot conditioning attempts, and my cardio is good enough that I will be fine I'm sure.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm going to do my run, and start investigating "performance enhancement science" ideas...I'm pretty sure I will be the most competitive person in the world at that, as well as at, in general, physics, computer science, mathematics, statistics, communication, and writing. Hopefully I will get my chess game and exercise abilities in top-notch shape, too!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I believe I get it...I understand something...anyway, I decided to skip running for today after all, and focus on other "research-related activities."
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I will do great, and my plans at this point haven't really changed.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A quick comment about a new understanding I have of my CIA opponents: They think that their attention to detail, thoroughness in planning, and very aggressive engineering efforts will, once demonstrated, somehow "break my morale" because (they think) "I am immoral" because "I am mentally ill and not Christian," and I do not acknowledge them as being above me in any way morally--for sure, given how they act. Basically, they have been continually baffled by how their aggressive demonstrations have led to me absorbing and reverse engineering a lot of their most valued secret technologies, including ones that I find knowledge of to be extremely useful to me and that I do not wish to repeat, even though I could since it is not my disclosure of classified information (is it classified?) that is being readily passed to unauthorized persons, that is what they are doing. The compartment of the CIA that is supervising in a way what is happening is apparently very much unaware of some of the secret technologies I have learned about, simply by spectating and watching their absurd, inappropriate theatrics.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just felt like saying that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > In short, it seems like almost nothing will stop the CIA from illegally leaking many of their most valuable classified secrets to me, rather frequently, without my consent or permission. I am being very unusually educated, and I did not ask to be.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Another thing I realized about Richard Darkins' comment: If people in the US are familiar with me and Biden's attacks on me, then if they really think that Biden is going to succeed at continuing to bother me, given how many times he has lied and how I have been perfectly honest and the fact that honesty is a trait and the five-factor model is established science, then such people clearly do not understand or do not accept the science of the five-factor model.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I learned a lot more important and interesting things today.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My updates list of activities in the future is now:
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - publishing writing (fiction and maybe non-fiction)--no STEM or writing code at all
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - investing, based on scientific principles and not computer algorithms
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - day job (I might not reveal where I would be moving or what industry it is, given the levels of harassment and friendliness around here)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - boxing (I think it is a good idea for me to pursue a sport in my free time, not just exercise)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - continuing private science research that I will not share to fuel my other endeavors
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I *think* I will still be able to Africa, probably in a number of years rather than right away. You will note, I am avoiding things that are unfairly "access denied" activities for minority people and others who face discrimination. My plans are perfectly ethical and benevolent. I will persist in my efforts to help Africa, and also likely to help out in whatever community I am able to settle in comfortably.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On a personal and psychological note: As I noted, I recently became aware that a lot of things can be addicting. I've done a good, perfect-track-record job of stopping watching adult videos and stopping listening to modern music on purpose, cold turkey. Today, I noticed that I was feeling a little bit different and more absorbed in my own thinking, partly in a good way, but I think it is because I have been doing too many gaming activities, especially playing "Space Trader Merchant Marine," which is actually a really fun game--I beat the whole 5-level campaign part of the game, and today, I finished the first two "challenge" sections of the game...I think there are three sections of the challenge thing total. Anyway, I think I'm spending too much time on gaming, and I need to take a break. I said it was for therapeutic reasons, and I don't want to over-do it. I am also going to not play chess for a while. I didn't play today, but I was playing lots of games in the past few days before that...in the future, I will probably limit my chess activity to weekends. I'll probably still play a lot of games, but just in a few segments. I had been playing games with 10 minutes per side, and I was doing it for practice. I got tired quickly in many cases.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Thus, I have decided to stop all gaming activities for the next 3 days. In four days, I'll evaluate and see if I want to start up again, or if I'm doing fine without it. I might eventually finish the last challenge thing in STMM, but I don't want to mess up my health, particularly at a sensitive time like this for me, when I'm still being assaulted by bots sometimes, even choked at night, with the full and extremely inappropriate support of Congress.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I know what I'm going to be working on for the next few days also. I'm planning out what to do while I wait to hear back regarding my job search. I applied to about 10 jobs, and I decided that I won't apply to more jobs...I believe I'm qualified, and there shouldn't be any reason why I wouldn't hear back from the employers even just having applied to 10 jobs. If my "email interview" rate is less than 10%, something is wrong anyway.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK...I'm done with everything I was going to do tonight, really. I have a little bit more food to eat, I'm going to try to relax and feel good, hopefully I'll get a good night of sleep without bot interruptions, and I am looking forward to having a peaceful day tomorrow...maybe I'll get a phone interview request since it's Monday, we'll see! I am trying to be optimistic and good-natured.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Some sort of random thoughts: I have started to feel as though I do not like the websites youtube.com or cnn.com visually. I wonder if that is a psychological thing, since I don't use YouTube for modern music any more. I sort of don't like logging in to YouTube sometimes, just because I don't want to have to look at the web design of that website.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I have a pleasant enough day planned for tomorrow. I have decided that I will not be traveling anywhere far until I can get a job. My only work task tomorrow is going to be working on a STEM-based art, writing, and communication idea tomorrow...it should be interesting, even though I really only have an hour set aside for that work, and no time set aside for any other work. (I'll probably have to stock up on groceries again tomorrow.)
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It might be a challenge to find things to do until 2 p.m. when I wake up, since I'm not doing any gaming activities for 3 days. Maybe I should try to think of something to do if I wake up at around 10 or 11, which I probably will. I would want to do something relaxing and low-stress...hmmmm...I don't think I should get involved in doing anything on the internet, and I don't really feel like reading...Shift is a fine novel and I'm some number of chapters into it, but I don't want to keep reading it right now. No gaming, so that basically rules out everything on the computer other than typing, since I said no internet. Hmmm...maybe I could drive somewhere, but I don't want to over do the trips to the mall for walking, 1 or 2 a day seems to be enough. Also, my typical thing to do for now is sort of "act like I haven't woken up until 2" since I am trying to be nice to myself for sleeping better and having woken up early, so I have been typically not eating or showering until 2. I don't think I want to exercise in the mornings...what shall I do? I already told Rosey that I am going to try to space out my visits with her to be only about once every two weeks, which she seemed to approve of, along with my other (perfectly legal to make) disclosures about IC/military technology to her that may help her understand household life better. AFAIK, Rosey understands a lot of English quite well...I think she has some ability to learn words from reading emotional cues, I don't think she understands every single thing I say, but I sort of think she knows how to "prioritize her attention" based on tone-of-voice cues, and I bet she can kind of tell if I'm just saying some sort of "generic 'good girl! what a good puppy!'" kind of thing, and when I'm saying something more content-heavy that she should try to parse the words of. That is just my guess though.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I also do not want to try to watch any TV shows. I think what I should do is some sort of "fun, easy, relaxing, psychological health activity"...something I can just type about and not get too "new STEM heavy" with, but just some sort of simple enough prompt-based idea for thinking of something to say about myself and the interactions I've had in some way that could maybe help my psychological health, particularly in terms of decreasing stress and anxiety and "ghost feelings of upsetness" that I can't explain. That is probably what I will do tomorrow...I'll probably try to design a prompt for that tonight and write it down on my computer, and then consider doing that tomorrow early on if I'm up early.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Hopefully I can think of something sort of mildly original and different from the usual psych activities I have done in the past.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Yo, I just have to let you know right now...the truth is, I thought of the 'Calculus Man' joke before anyone else, it was my idea. Everything else? It was exchanged for that joke by the creators of Superman. I'll show myself out now."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Something occurred to me this evening...probably, Sasha Burkhoff, whose names sounds like it was selected by her parents to sound like "the perfect name for a well-respected cryptologist," and thus a possible prospect as as NSA recruit as a mentally healthy student who had attended TJHSST in Virginia, had her brain-tumor-caused murder orchestrated initially by pro-life activists. According to my analysis, there is no other reason or group who would do it. I never actually spoke with Sasha, just saw and much later thought to recall a look she gave me when I think she had been diagnosed by the brain tumor, but I didn't have a strong emotional reaction, not that I was unkind or inappropriate about it in any way, but my sense of it is, she sounds like a target of pro-life religious extremists who didn't like TJHSST in general, didn't feel it was worth to murder me--they surely faced counter-attacks, probably including lethal ones, for their actions--since I was set up to be tortured as a math slave for years, and they could only pick out one student to kill to send a message about the NSA and the types of extremist fighters whom they might have felt would work there...in theory...so my sense of it is, even if she was a religious Christian and supported pro-life positions, she might have been targeted for not being "tough enough" on pro-choicer's, like my grandmother, who was kind to me although I am a liberal atheist...she even tried to not speak to me too much when I was physically present in the house, apparently that doesn't suffice for the extremists. Anyway, it is also certainly possible that Sasha was actively pro-choice. I think my theory is right. Relatedly, probably, Heath Ledger was murdered over some sort of political cause he had supported in a movie before The Dark Knight...I don't know what that would be, but my guess is, judging from Julia Stiles's comments about Ledger and Chrissy Teigen, who emotionally abused and harassed a gay man, according to what I read, he probably supported gay rights much more than actresses like Maggie Gylenhall and Julia Stiles felt comfortable...probably more "pro-choice, that's it, I just say I'm liberal" types.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, I realized that Dr. Kudurogianis was not evil...he is also facing threats, I'm sure, and did the amount of helpful psychiatric work that he felt he would be able to do safely...I think he omitted some "emotional distress" and "employment/socialization" issues due to reasons I would not understand, perhaps related to his safety or something else. I think it is fairly clear that the psychiatric treatment that he did helped me a lot...if I become suspicious that he was actually evil once again, based on me having noticed some detail that I hadn't seen before, I will probably be sure to post my latest theory about that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Great news for people who are on my side! I spent this morning beginning and planning out further work on a "STEM-based system for recovering psychologically from harassment attacks," so that I can use some of my best secret ideas to identify cognitive issues I may be having, including with "inclinations to snap at other angrily," feeling restricted from doing certain things for no good reason, not caring enough and feeling callous about people whom I'm trying to care about and ought to care about, and other issues, and use my competitively excellent ideas to work on "fixing the damage to my mind muscles/processes" so that I can "exercise those muscles" healthily and without pain so that I can get them to be stronger and working properly, as they were in the past and should be for my health and sense of identity/self-concept. Also good news: I think that given local residents' plots to sabotage me psychologically for whatever weird reason, this announcement will demoralize them, and my announcement that it will demoralize them will likely vex them if they want to start up more strange "Wile E. Coyote schemes" to "trick and deceive and psychologically 'hex'" me to feel or perform in a way that is not my best. I.e., I think they will start to realize that their weird and freaky endeavors to mess with me are not a good investment of their time, and they'll sense the regret and unhappiness they will feel later when they see that it didn't work and was all just a frankly pathetic waste of their time, and their movement to bother me will lose enthusiasm.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, my psychology activity for this morning was a big success! I have planned some more work on it to do tomorrow, during my main hours of activity during the day, after 2 p.m.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A comment about this ordeal: I note that there were *very many* people who, in this crisis situation for me, were essentially required to do enough of their part to "give me the password" to get out of trouble. A lot of people refused, in some cases citing right-wing extremist ideology, and in other cases citing threats to them and their families. The thing about the latter situation is, basically, a lot of people "passed the burden" to my family leading to at least two relatives dying, very likely murdered by the CIA, while the other people "wanted to play it safe." I.e., by not doing their jobs, they aggressively and inappropriately passed the "lack of safety burden" from their families to mine, causing damage. Thus, the "right to be outraged and to retaliate" lies with the people who are in my family who are unethical, not with them. Basically, the JACM, Cornell, and Cambridge University in Britain, murdered my grandmother and my uncle, citing, in a sense ,a desire to be safe by virtue of having a good, sustained relationship with political terrorists and mobsters in the CIA, who illegally kill innocent people to seek to pursue their political will.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said "people in my family who are ethical," that's an inserted typo.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Oh, Publix just started discriminating against me today...how original and surprising. I CuRrEnTlY have a very thick skin about this sort of thing, and it doesn't bother me or affect me that much...I will keep shopping there for now while I still live in this dumb area. It's just, "Say goodbye to all your appealing future career possibilities, Publix employees! You don't even know what you are doing professionally, at all, and the double entendre in this sentence is intended!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Regarding my job search...I can see 9 of the jobs I applied to on the panel on the job applications website; the region I applied to is in a different time zone in the USA. I am very qualified, and I applied last Wednesday. I hope I am not being locked out by another tiresome political attack on me for no reason, one that would have pointed at me no matter what I said or did, simply because I am a mentally atheist. Anyway, I only heard back from one employer so far, and they said no to my application. Hopefully I will hear more from the other employers within the next few days...how thoroughly did Donald Trump and his lieutenants seize control of the US job market??! I hope I won't wind up just sitting here, exerting political power by typing out things on Usenet, using new STEM ideas that I have that are under development that bad guys wouldn't understand because they are not able to "crack the code" of the English language! I would really prefer to be an employed private citizen, not an ongoing law-abiding anti-US-government antagonist using cutting edge STEM capabilities to trip up US political agendas pretty much every day! Gosh, I wish I could stop feeling compelled to mess with with the USA's secretly right-wing extremist, anti-Semitic, anti-Muslim, anti-atheist government for a week or two!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The US Democratic Party has never before been forced to negotiate a full, unconditional "political surrender" to anyone, have they? Well, if I'm still here in a couple months, you'll all get to find out that feels. Imagine an America with *NO LIBERALISM WHATSOEVER.* Are you excited to live in that world? Is that what you are voting for by denying my rights, or would you like to delude yourselves and side with Biden? Indeed, I *couldn't* convince the Democrats to stop hurting or be reasonable...I can't educate them on how to be smart and rational, all I can do is destroy everything everything they ever fought for, for me because I like me and I think my life and rights matter, and then keep attacking everyone, ruining everything they've gotten and fought for over the years, until they have nothing left and realize how dumb they were.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Would you be gentler in some way if I did what you did to me to one of you? No! You are doing things to me, and I haven't committed *one* crime against any of you or any of your backers. If I had eagerly served you and gotten nothing in returned, you would have tried to Auschwitz me anyway, and would not have backed no matter what. Get ready to see where this path with leads, I'm now apparently about to be your tour guide to a whole new America that you will not recognize and not like, because it will have been politically completely re-shaped by me with cutting edge science ideas, unless I am able to not face discrimination during my job search. How much is it worth to you? Did you, "everything?" Hint: Yes, and you're right! That's what it will cost. You're already paying a large percentage of the total possible cost, do you want to increase that or decrease that?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Basically, my failure was, I thought the US leaders were self-interested and smart. I thought they would be smart enough and not crazy, and would let me have my rights and let me go. I guess they are not that smart, and insist on being pummeled some more. Either that, or I'm gong to be getting interviewed sometime this week that's for sure.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Basically, at this point, if you have been a bad guy linked to the team of people who are homicidally stalking me, if you are not done with me by the end of this week and I am not actively interviewing for jobs, you will soon be done enjoying any benefits of American liberalism, period. I have the power to do that, no one else does. Did you miss what happened to Build Back Better, abortion rights, the US military's power, Biden's approval ratings, Democratic control of Congress, and even Donald Trump being used as a threat or having a viable candidacy, due to my use of my STEM powers and the US government's failure to heed my protest on behalf of my basic Constitutional rights? In that case, I even *told you fools* *exactly* what I was doing, STEM-wise. Next time, it will be a different set of excellent capabilities, and I will not tell you a think about what I'm doing, it will devastate Democrats politically, you won't be able to guess what I'm doing with algorithms or anything else, and it will all be perfectly legitimate and in accordance with the rules. Now let me go or face the consequences!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I did a great job on my STEM research task today...things are coming along extremely well, and my work is even more fun than usual. I have more such work to do tomorrow.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Regarding the conflict: To say it again another way: The clear and repeated and persistent, un-American argument of my opponents who think I should be caged and not allowed to socialize, date, or have a job, is: "We have every right to ignore the separation of church and state and freedom of religion in the US Constitution, because we would prefer to view atheists as cattle, with worthless lives, whom the government has the right to slaughter or try to slaughter, without any respect for their rights or feelings, at any time that we choose, with no regard for any laws. We may also slaughter people like cattle that we see as 'failing to dehumanize atheists' and being too friendly with them." That is the kind of extremist you've signed up to support if you're backing Biden and his cronies. You don't want to go there, it's roughly the same thing as anti-Semitism.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A couple of developments:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 1 - It looks like the mall has changed its hours, and now it closes at 7 p.m. I don't think it used to...I wonder if the Christian church that meets in two of the store-type areas had something to do with the change, to make a statement about me?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 2 - It occurred to me this evening that some time ago, someone credible hinted to me that I was likely being considered for the position of Secretary of Defense some time ago. I might have been the youngest one if my various promotions and career achievements hadn't been sabotaged! It is probably a good idea for me to mention this at this time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A dramatic reflection on my recent learning endeavors:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Ze codes, Mr. Vite. Ze codes! Now you see...velcome to schizophrenia, ze codes, zey make you genius!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I seem to be mostly out of jokes though. Remember when I said--rapped, rather:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "If I say things are like things and express opinion
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Each booty babe will fail to not become my minion"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ...remember when that seemed like it was going to be true?? What happened????!! All those comedic rap songs, and all I got was...uh...deniably video messaged by Zara Larsson and then blocked. Step up to the plate, yo! You only live once, and there's only one me. My arrogance, like so much else, knows no bounds...just as it is with my physics knowledge, I'm one of a kind! Now, in a space-time continuum sense, it is all women in the USA who are desperate, deep down, maybe unconsciously, to meet me, and not the other way around! Again, it's like Linkin Park always envisioned for me: "So [he's] waitin' until the upper hand is [his]....". Don't disrespect the prophecy, yo!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Would that I could calibrate my jokes to be funnier, for the perfect audience...forsooth.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (Yes, this again.)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, I do not actually know if Zara Larsson is a Nazi who supports murdering me for being an atheist. I wrote above assuming she was not.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, regarding the Richard Dawkins Tweet: Here is a really good idea; I would think that every single US citizen who is currently residing in the US, has heard of me or met me and heard what happened to me, is alive and feeling well, and never supported right-wing extremism, and didn't get a chance to get in touch when I demanded to be contacted between Sept 2020 and the present, ought to send me an email, at least wishing me well, maybe offering to see if there is anything such a person could do to help me, given that I will have basically just gotten out of a de facto American (??!) concentration camp.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The obvious question about why any such person who would read this and then not get in touch with me is, "Why not?," and it would tend to suggest that such a person, given my insistence and biography and status as a virtuous bipolar American atheist, would either feel "extremely threatened by a still-tyrannical US government," or, more likely, would be a "radicalized right-wing extremist residing in America who supports ethnic cleanings operations, against the mentally ill, against atheists, and against black people residing in Africa." Otherwise, why wouldn't such a person at least send a quick email checking it? It would seem to suggest some sort of "mass radicalization epidemic" that hit the USA, that would have hit the people who refused to contact me, and that there is indeed, as Fox News suggested when speaking of a "silent majority," that a very large number of people in the USA have apparently converted to fascism. Otherwise, I would receive at least a quick "glad you're feeling better' email for sure, from everyone who had heard of me, given that I would be like Anne Frank if she had managed to just finish escaping from a Nazi concentration camp...surely all of the people who wished her well and didn't support her being tortured and murdered by Nazis would want to send her an email congratulating her on her escape and wishing her well? There could be no other explanation, of course.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK, so I am going to go to bed soon. I am pleased that, looking at the text I've written and the lack of any coherent response to it or accusation from government officials or anyone else with authority, it is clear that it has been clear, for months now, that I am totally and 100% a victim of right-wing extremists in government and beyond...I am not a bad guy and never deserved this. So that is good.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, my science projects are going well. I am feeling a little bit mildly restless at night--it is hard to tell how much of that is due to the wake-ups from the government-linked bad guys--but mostly I feel fine each day. Just bored, ready for things to change so that I can get out of here and have a real, normal life as I and other innocent people deserve to have. I am one of the smartest and most talented people in the world now, so in spite of my set backs, I am a fairly fortunate person in terms of talent and long-term (decades-type term) outcome...I'm sure I'll be doing great in my 40's, I'll just be a little bit older and past my prime physically. Mentally, I'll surely still be the best theorem prover in the world, and that will be the source of my talent, which I'll be sure to stockpile and keep to myself.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So...I am trying to think of ways to relax at night. I looked at the YouTube videos again, and in spite of my different viewing choices, they are all completely *useless*, the recommendations totally suck and it is unpleasant even looking at the thumbnails on the main page. Now that I'm avoiding Twitter due to discrimination, I am starting to feel like groups.google.com is the only site I ever want to visit, except for maybe checking my email accounts on Yahoo and Gmail, and also occasionally glancing at cnn.com, which is also a crap website, but I ought to know a few of the top headlines that are not being covered up at any given time. So yeah. I am finding writing in my offline files to be more productive and interesting than anything there is to do online. I like typing in my offline files and walking, and eating, and I wish I could socialize and date and maybe have sex. Other than that, I'm not all that limited....I can't do work for money yet, perhaps due to government limitations, but I can still exert more political and other power than anyone else in the world...I'll have all my latest ideas set up and ready to use soon, and I'll just type what I want to type on Usenet, and see how that goes. It should have an impact, and again, it won't be unethical or against the law...I'll be sure. So my "job," coming soon if I'm not released or employed, will be writing appropriate STEM-backed posts, in captivity, on the internet to continue to exert my political will on the world. I should be allowed to socialize and friends--I'm a perfectly nice and quite normal person, I follow the rules, don't do anything wrong, just file complaints about the epidemic of weirdos bothering me and never start fights, always do the right thing, never do any weird or creepy/strange things to other people like try to "scare them" or follow them around or harass them, always behave appropriately and like I should. Anyway, I'll see where this ends pretty soon I'm sure...the bad guys, I don't think, can take many more losses...I mean they can, but they really wouldn't look like they are even employed if they keep pushing with this, I don't get how such high-power leaders of the US, in such a competitive field, can be so completely stupid, irrational, nakedly and publicly pro-extremism and pro-terrorism, and able to still maintain approval ratings of about 30%. I admit, I'm quite stunned by that capability...how can such incompetent figure out a way to keep their jobs without ever doing them, how on earth do they do that? I'm not jealous and don't want to copy that, but the example is stunning and interesting in its own right, like Caligula's success as a Roman leader.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Once again, I am thinking some more about Richard Dawkins' Tweet. Liar drops R; maybe that means, Joe Biden drops Regency Mall, without the monolith, i.e., I will get hired based on the region I correctly applied to. If so, great! That will be excellent. My usual "Donkey Kong dance," not that I think mentally ill people should be considered apes, but I'm thinking of the "aggressive impactful stomping" of sorts, before big event relevant to me that might be sabotaged that may require a "vocally aggressive send-off to the immediate predecessor time" just before the full result is in, to pre-attack in case I've been "foiled again by a pinball-tilt wizard with no ethics or sense of 'gosh, that was too much, enough is enough,'" is basically contained above in some of the writing. I basically always do that, in this situation where I post a lot in public, right before I think that something big and important I'm working towards is about to possibly be sabotaged into not working right again, based on an initial "bad sign," which just be an incidental thing and nothing to worry about over all.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I'm thinking maybe I will get a job. I hope so. I'm going to turn the computer off pretty soon and get more fully ready to fall asleep.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, I am a little bit worried about: the guy with the bald head who used to also walk on Quioccasin Road who I think was mentally ill, Kristen, who sometimes walked on Quioccasin Road and seemed to have disappeared recently, and the guy that I saw who was black who seemed like he was mentally ill on Quioccasin, and the white guy who looked like he liked to wear military camouflage type of clothing and a hat whom I would see on Quioccasin road...there was also the black guy that I called "nodding head man" who used to bother me, he might have been mentally ill, and maybe I shouldn't blame him for having bothered me by nodding his fast when I was very much more sensitive and messed up due, I think, to trauma-related mental illness. Is anyone going to help them if they are still in trouble and not where they want to be in life yet? They looked like they were totally shunned by the local community and very under-supported, if they did indeed have mental health problems...probably they weren't even all identifying as atheists. I hope that my "monolith" will be their "monolith," too, i.e., that they will be able to get out of isolation, if they're in isolation in the Tuckahoe area and not already out of isolation.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A couple more comments:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Yeah I trained my "inner word-fighter persona" in melee combat with Ras al CVS. I stole the power to be extremely rude, with or without a reason of any sort.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - This morning, I noticed that my neck and shoulders felt a little weird and sort of sore, like it would feel comfortable to rest my head by tilting it to the right, like I was Stephen Hawking who was paralyzed and had his head looking like it was at an angle in his wheelchair, at least that was my perception...maybe it was not actually at much of an angle, checking the photos on Google briefly. It sounds like a nasty joke about me and atheists and highly competent STEM people, and I received a credible psych hint about the government-linked gesture doing this, suggesting that it is not a total surprise, perhaps, and a psych professional somewhere knew that a gesture of this nature would be done at some point, and maybe the perpetrator's psychological state and behavior are not necessarily hard to explain or predict, to an extent, at all. Yes, there is probably something psychological to be learned from my own initial explorations into basic amateur psychology...what did I reach for first, how is my "first-choice" lens to reach for characterized? Whatever. I'm mainly pivoting back to "easy psych ideas," just because my psych "research," amateur and not valuable/competitive or not, is mainly just to help me improve my own health for now, not to win any "innovative psychology research contests" or anything along those lines. I'm more interested in competing, vaguely speaking, at "applied math that I can use to get ahead at almost anything performance-related," in a variety of different contexts.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Remember: It is the lives of Nazis and other intolerant right-wing extremists that are worthless, not the lives of the people that they target and despise.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > youtube.com/watch?v=C9SiRNibD14&embeds_euri=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2F&source_ve_path=MjM4NTE&feature=emb_title
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yes, this video is sad. Science is a good thing--the means to power, health, safety, technological progress, and often prosperity.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, it is concerning that this woman from Africa is trying to like Newton's scientific achievements with colonization. There is no evidence that science is linked to discrimination or exploitation of minority groups or people outside of the US.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A concern is that many people would argue that people who want to support colonizing or otherwise support exploiting Africa ought to be killed, i.e., if it is not illegal in your country to kill someone who wants to support fascism or slavery-like activities, then it would not be a bad idea to kill that person, like killing a Confederate or Nazi soldier in battle; the lives of confirmed fascists are worthless, and within the constraints of US law in America, ought to be either imprisoned, killed, or otherwise removed from relevance and ideally prosperity, as soon as possible. That goes for anyone who wants to eliminate some or all people from a particular legitimate background as though they had no rights, whether the background is ethnic, religious, or something else not related to "being an evil predatory fascist."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I am hoping that she does not mean that she thinks that pro-science people should be killed. Sadly, if she adopted such a position and pushed for it, she would put herself into a very bad category. I am speaking about this because I believe that people in Africa, who may have been denied some Western educational benefits, deserve more of a chance to turn around mistaken behavior and not support hurting pro-science people, including science-interested students in school who might not thrive without education...although that is different from wanting "pro-science people killed," and she didn't say that she wanted that, I am just worried about the claimed connection between colonialism and science.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My point is that people who support murder and fascism become, after a certain possible grace period of controversial length, people with worthless lives. Most people who fought for Naziism in WW2 ought not be given a chance to "tell everyone they're sorry and repent," that's good enough. There are some fascists from different parts of history that should not be allowed out of jail for 500 years. I still oppose the death penalty avidly, but any person who converts to fascism, while not losing his or her rights as a possibly accused criminal person or not, loses the "desirability of their existence," although it might be illegal to kill them without a trial.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So my point is, do not ever join forces with fascists, no matter what opinions you may have about people from backgrounds other than your own--you may champion your beliefs and backgrounds, but never support the denial of rights or the denial of desirability of other people being alive, unless such people are fascists, i.e., people who themselves deny the desirability of being alive to others over a mere beliefs-based disagreement that does involve calling for the deaths of innocent, "maybe just wrong" people, as opposed to true fascists.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said, "that's not good enough."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Someone outside signaled me to "see Bill Gates," so I did.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > What is he saying? "PW aim [is getting close with] the world" ? What, now for the first time? Is this some sort of reverse psychology trick?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Why didn't Microsoft offer to hire me, since it understood my talent all along?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My aim is to have my own life, withhold my STEM talents as punishment for the "slavery and extraction" initiative that political terrorists backed, presumably because they didn't want me to get big at DOD because criminals in STEM business, like Zuckerberg and possibly also Gates--I don't know--might fear my rules-based leadership and top-notch talent at STEM. I also want to help Africa. Is there some sort of claim that I have been inconsistent in anything I said?? Is it claimed that my chemistry disclosure, related to BQP = P and disease cures, somehow does *not* cure cancer?? Please, check with an expert who still trusts you, if you can find one! I am definitely no longer "crank" by any measure, and I never was one, just somewhat ignorant about classical mechanics and other areas of physics--I had been quite behind on studying, now I am not--I don't have a deep understanding of relativity, general or special, but I get the very basics of QM, and I understand classical mechanics well.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Bill Gates must not smear me, or risk being seen as "just another big-money-man cheater who fought his way to the top, became 'a king of having money,' and added no value to the world," just as the excellent researcher and publisher CS Christos Papadimitriou seems to have predicted, sort of.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I *will* help Africa if I can make the money. Why wouldn't I? Is it claimed that I cannot, that I don't have the will to spend money on such things? Does Gates actually believe that a condition for my freedom, as a brilliant, totally innocent atheist who is much better at math, CS, and engineering than he is, even as a top-ranked business leader, is that I must "serve the world" with my STEM talents, publishing free "naked photos of all the things that make me powerful," so that he can make money from them and not I? I've given more than enough free STEM gifts to the world, it is time for me to be *compensated* for my work, and also, well past time for me to be liberated--unlike Gates, I've never been credibly accused of committing a serious crime.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe Gates is questioning why I have lost interest in STEM. Oh, is he pretending that he doesn't know a certain fact about computers, or does he actually not know?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, if Gates is not a fascist or homicidal criminal at least, I *demand* his full support for my release. He should have offered to buy my IP, but not being a likely candidate for being ethical, he probably would never do that. I have nothing to fear from a "lacking Bill Gates like" as long as I do not work as a STEM worker in the STEM industry; his "like" is irrelevant in my new chosen field.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A question about the local community:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Are most citizens in the Tuckahoe area *actually* claiming that they "don't really have free speech rights or the right to peaceably assemble near me," or is that another fake-out attempt? If they believe that, do they accept that, and is their defense against further curtailments against their rights, due to their crimes, that "no one has the capability to do anything to us, so we're just going to keep doing our way?" I think that attitude will not get a good outcome; no one wants to tell you how certain techniques for dealing with "right-wing bad guy daredevils" are sometimes used to fight back.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Whatever that other post says on my thread, I am not reading it.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, the Little League tragedy of today is, Publix once again was deliberately out of YoCrunch (they claimed credit for it yesterday). Clearly, there is only one question about this situation: Will I, or will I not, get into volunteer "Retail Rap" under the rapper name, "Cashier Fatherf---er For Fun," and how many cashier careers will I mercilessly ruin with the awesome power of the pen?? IS there a limit to how much damage I can enjoy myself while sustaining it and waiting for whatever to happen? Who knew hurting bad-guy people's lives could be so fun???
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yo, I gotta start right there, I can't just leave that hanging, yo....
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > UNTITLED RAP
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > by Cashier Fatherf---er For Fun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yo, my name is Manheim, they think they're Julia Right
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A Stiles motherpredecessor, ring it up as a fight, yo...
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I can't delete losers as fast as I shop, but
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I would compete to get losers' heads on a justice chopping block
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > You know, I am an artist--my words are OK--because, I
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Fight relentlessly to just prove I'm still not gay, because I
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Am gay deep down, unless it's a statement to show, that
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm not intimidated by deletions of Yo-
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Crunch, um, you knew that was coming 'cause I rap about me
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I channel adrenaline and I charge a fee, you see
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The metaphorical gun flash but you think there's no gun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > And yeah, it's just a metaphor, I smoked you for fun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > [begin snare]
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm not Obama--I just snort Confederates when stuck on an island
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > If I write aggressive raps and die will they scream, "Oh, why, man??!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Does anyone miss anyone without a new rap atmosphere?--no.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I thought I proved to them my strength is from being non-sex-queer, though.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quirky adrenaline, you'll never trace it down, guys
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I spurt technologies, and you lose blood like dead flies
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > You sign up for death and more death and I'm totally blameless
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I thought He'd cancel you, but everyone's shameless.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > [guitar solo]
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I need an outro that returns to the central
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Theme of my rap which is that you are all no-go's
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I use that word and not the p-slur--I'm perfect
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Still bag the groceries miss, your life is now worthless.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > That's my rap song! What do you think? I feel comfortable asserting that viciously insulting intransigent law breaker cashiers is not harassment or stalking, as long as I don't name names or say anything directly in public. I have a right to make political speech, in the form of art, whether your like it or not. A lot of people are saying that they hate me for stupid reasons, why not get more insulting, see if they like it more? Maybe some professional rapper will come out and say how much they hate me too, I'll be sure to quiver. Also, I'm still under duress, as anyone can see! The hate-fueled nightmare is supposed to never end according to them, I don't have to persuade you, if you don't know how to think, it's your graves, Confederacy punks! Fascists always lose! Don't delude yourselves about exactly what you are! Note, retail work is fine, if you do it WITHOUT trying to intimidate, harass, gaslight, or discriminate against people. Let's see how juiced up Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren will get this time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > That was fun. Now on to other things.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yeah that's right I was actually mean, once. What!!!!!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > No I am not going to publish any new STEM ideas to help the military or other goons. I'm immune to all manipulative tricks, I'm done outputting STEM, forever, you're on your own, losers.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm starting to worry that Biden shut down my job search in another state, too. The job was one I was extremely qualified for, and I still haven't heard anything positive from any of the jobs I applied to.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > So...do all geographic regions in the USA support the idea that Biden is completely control of law-abiding, intelligent religious minorities' members being able to get a job, literally anywhere? Can Biden shut down good career moves for any atheist in the USA? I suspect that the answer is yes, and no one will talk about it...I hope something really nasty and permanent happens to the people who are making sleazy deals of this nature, in clear support of anti-atheist fascism.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway...I don't know what to do next, I have fought and worked as hard as almost anyone ever could, but just as Einstein would have trouble getting out of a concentration camp if he had stayed in Germany for too long, all my talents and work and digging deep, and really exerting myself to try to look out for myself and exercise my legal rights and get a good job have thwarted by vastly populated legions, sadly, of American right-wing extremists. They are not being challenged enough, they have largely taken over the economy of the country, and contrary to my initial belief, it looks like they do not merely control STEM and retail.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > FYI, I am not saying it is a Jewish conspiracy, in case someone thinks that I sound like some sort of bad guy who is claiming that "Jews are trying to control everything." It is not Jewish people, it is American political crooks. WHEN will they cut this out? It has been almost 12 years, I tried asking nicely and appealing to reason and the evidence and my innocence, I tried demonstrations of my STEM talent and was just smeared (e.g., with the Hodge Conjecture, my logic result, the twin prime conjecture, etc.), I finally resorted to aggressively attacking the fascist leaders who are perpetrating this...what am I supposed to do? What is any person in my position, being innocent and just mentally ill and an atheist, supposed to do to get away from extra-judicial assaults and "containment efforts" made against by government-employed fascists?? Someone is supposed to fix this! I could warn of the consequences--some of them have already been faced--but I am growing tired of that. Don't try to convert the USA to a racist dictatorship, that is not good for anyone. Leave me alone and let me work!!! Fascists deserve death, not liberals!
> > > > > > > > > > > > I just realized something: The government still thinks it's going to use "stress" and "psychological manipulation" to manipulate my mood and feelings, and put me in great distress--probably with a few more "false hope" things, then "choking incidents," then "weird and confusing signals that seem to be about something important...but what are they really saying?", and try to manipulate me into changing my mind into publishing more STEM.
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > In the past, I definitely changed my mind about publishing differential equations--I thought it would help, and it probably did...it probably ended the US's ability to be a navy and air force superpower, basically permanently, unless more help would be provided by me.
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > I do not share things at random. I try to do what is in my interests, whether I'm stressed out and desperate (I probably won't be in the near future at all) or not. I have done a really good job on working on being able to relax. I AM NOT GOING TO PUBLISH ANY MORE STEM. I made sure, after I changed my mind on diff eq publication, to also change my mind and "declare law-abiding war on the US Department of Defense," and I did that, and I won...I tossed them a breakable code using BPP = P, and they can use it, but it doesn't matter--all their secret things were lost to their adversaries via flight surveillance and cryptology during the no-codes phase.
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > I won the war on DOD, they just want to deny it, and now shower THEMSELVES with false hope and optimism, thinking that they are "such great Christian guys, of COURSE they'll get it back, the US NEVER loses like this," precisely because the US has never been this morally wrong-headed or right-wing and extremist before; the US declared war on terrorism in 2001, and thus itself in the near future--today.
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > I WILL NEVER PUBLISH MORE STEM TO HELP THE GOVERNMENT FOR ANY OTHER REASON. It is over, I am keeping it to myself to fuel other endeavors, I am *never* going to try to help *anyone*, other than my own children, with STEM sharing or explanation efforts, EVER AGAIN.
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe that will clarify some things.
> > > > > > > > > > > My day today was fairly pleasant. I had to go to Food Lion to get YoCrunch because Publix still wouldn't stock it...whatever. I will probably write more "rather absurd rap songs" to exercise my sense of humor, since I can't even talk right now, but I'll probably be more light-hearted and less mean in the future.
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > Somewhat disappointingly, my schedule for my day tomorrow is basically exactly the same as my schedule for today. I worked for more than an hour on my math research task today, which was great and yielded some good ideas. I am still continuing the same research tomorrow, and I might do it for at most 2 more days before I move on. I am only doing real work for 1-2 hours a day right now, and I'm still on my gaming break. I might stay on that, unless I get more headaches soon.
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > I am starting to think that the end of this will have nothing to do with getting the job I was trying to get from the job search.. Do I have to wait for the government to relent? What about waiting for the wildly nutty local citizens to relent? I don't see what they are thinking or afraid of or doing, why are they *all* *still* siding with fascist ideologies, do they think they will get some sort of warmth and protection from that? That is not a good move, side with the truth, good values, patriotism, the US Constitution, and me, not code-talking terrorist linked insider threat bad guys who "have a job in the government." I had a job in the government, let me tell you, that helps you 0% with law enforcement, whether you mention it or not, if you get arrested or TDO'd (I have never been arrested, but I have been TDO'd, twice by police, sometimes even improperly, shortly after quitting jobs as an NSA contractor...it changes nothing, which is how it is supposed to work). I.e., even if you think you have power from a government position and try to abuse it, the police will just ignore that. It's just a job, it's not a magical "becoming a king or queen" ceremony, you really shouldn't see government employees as "larger than life," they're mostly very inefficient and ineffective at getting things done at the office.
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > So anyway...I am trying to be calm, since it's getting late. I am trying to relax and not vent any more angry feelings or "creative interpretations for debate/persuasion/etc." about this nonsense. I wonder what it will take for me to be spoken to again? I don't know. I might take a break from all work pretty soon, but then I wouldn't know what to do with all my time.
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > Yeah, I wonder what the end of this will look like. Which will happen first? Will local residents come to their senses and stop backing fascists and code-talking liars? Will I get a job? Will someone from another state or another country write to me? Will the DOD write to me to apologize for their huge mistake/crime? Will the news run a story forcing a bad US political leader to resign, decreasing interest in this "project?" I don't know, but I've waited for over a decade for justice and access to my Constitutional rights!! What a farce, I don't know for sure what exactly these people are thinking.
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I'm going to try to have a pleasant night.
> > > > > > > > > > So, now that night-time is here, I note I would probably feel more relaxed if I typed something relaxing. Who knows why. I should be high-energy and full of comments and ideas and even a little bit of aggression during the day--I just remembered that I said I was going to stop being aggressive, but it is sometimes hard to remember all the different changes I wanted to make to improve my psych health, it's not that important that I stick to that, it is just important that I never publish STEM again.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I think the "monolith" is: Regency Mall drops Regency, i.e., when the local mall loses its administrative authority given to it on behalf of a monarch. What authority is that? What exactly can they do? I think Dawkins' subsequent comment, which came out to "clatter lordie," suggests that the Christian church there got investigated for extremism after my comment...I did see a little bit of evidence of that, some man inside one of their areas made a sort-of Nazi salute gesture at me, I mainly just ignored that, that sort of thing is pretty common around here.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Maybe I should disclose more strange mall activity?...they keep sending groups of young men with one overweight chesty woman by to say things, the group today yelled "penis" when I looked at them, and the woman made eye contact with me and said something like "bye bye Kyle," which is the first name of a male patient at Dominion Hospital that I went to see Dr. Steg in 2001. Maybe it helps to repeat these things, I don't know. I heard some other man say "bye Felicia" loudly a while ago, a number of days ago, at the mall. I heard a woman who looked pretty and might have been Hispanic talking on the phone, near the "escape rooms" thing with her group of friends, and I heard her say, "I have a reservation" over the phone, perhaps she was from out of town.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Last time with the overweight chesty woman, the code was something like "a cost" then "most sag" and then the code had like "two sniffles" after that, I don't know what they were trying to say. Whatever, I don't get the point or message of what they're trying to do, it sounds unfriendly. I saw a group of teenagers coming by, and they made some sort of like aggressive gesture while looking at me, like, "WHAT?!", and I didn't pay that much attention to them.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > There was a large group of people singing in the Christian church area a few days ago. Today, a black man in a Harvard sweatshirt came out of the bottom of the elevator, holding a staff or stick or whatever. Today, I saw a security guy on one of those electronic rolling segue thing, making some sort of gesture. I saw a guy like that working for security before; he did that when I first started walking there, then the next a different security guy started quickly shaking his head at me, then I complained, then there were two security workers sitting at a desk, and one of them sort of "put their hands up," a lot like one of the female workers at Food Lion did one time. I don't know the gang codes at all, I'm just posting to maybe help "drop the regency of Regency Mall," maybe it will work!
> > > > > > > > > Actually, no, DOS, "roboticdeepthroatconditioning.mil" is not a good idea for a web-based app for your upcoming startup. Get a little more creative, there actually are some fascists out there who are even better at thinking and science than you.
> > > > > > > > Rap About Walking In the RVA Area, Etc.
> > > > > > > > by Broom Philip
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > I've got to find a place to walk every day
> > > > > > > > The FBI is like shut down, so criminals may
> > > > > > > > Do what they want to do whenever they want
> > > > > > > > Follow me through shopping malls, grocery stores, and Deep Run Park
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > So I am writing a rap to kill some time, you know
> > > > > > > > I see the anarchists have killed fighting crime, and so
> > > > > > > > My free time's spent on research food and health
> > > > > > > > While the world is acting like it's favored by stealth
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > They think the secret spies stalk their enemies better
> > > > > > > > If they can't see it, they think, it makes women wetter
> > > > > > > > The movie-like atmosphere of intriguing spy pirates
> > > > > > > > Is, they think, the beauty of all violence in silence
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > The rap is weak today 'cause it's just a drill
> > > > > > > > You'd rather have just me and not the FBI chill, but
> > > > > > > > Indeed you wanted Sin City but got Gotham instead
> > > > > > > > You think you're safest when your eyes are closed in bed
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > My self-expression requires no apology, now
> > > > > > > > They changed god to mysteriousness in their brand new theology, now
> > > > > > > > The Christian church no longer has its true savior
> > > > > > > > And, they think forgiveness green lights every behavior.
> > > > > > > Here is my latest prediction of how it will end: On March 14 or so, 18 days after Dawkins' Tweet, Biden has predicted in public in code that Vladimir Putin will be killed by a US-linked drone strike, and then Biden's approval ratings will go up and he'll look more likely to win the 2024 election. The truth is, though, the capabilities to be dominant, air-force-wise, over Russia have been removed for the US; they cannot possibly have the power to do that sort of assassination any more--no country has that kind of power any more, at least not over the top developed nations with the GDP to support "the standard air force." Perhaps the bad guys will finally drop me and admit assaulting me wasn't worth it, even taking morality out of the equation. *Hopefully* they will regain a sliver of their sanity.
> > > > > > Update regarding my job search: I think I did apply to the right region--a place that is not against, e.g., LGBTQ people--and I think that there are firms that would like to reach out to me. My guess is, some political group essentially made "huge threats" against the firms that seemed likely to communicate with me, and there is a "brief pause for a battle," that the employers will win. So far, none of the 10 or so firms I applied to have written back except one...I bet they will, and it will just take a while, due to political pressure, which one of the firms even says it does not value above equal opportunity, even in cases of stalking.
> > > > > A comment on an excerpt from the article linked to on Richard Dawkins' Twitter:
> > > > >
> > > > > https://www.spectator.co.uk/article/who-really-discovered-dnas-structure/
> > > > >
> > > > > "This is a story replete with competition, friction, misunderstanding and some sexism, but it lacks anything truly unethical, let alone criminal. Four men and one woman, none of whom was perfect ... "
> > > > >
> > > > > What? "...it lacks anything truly unethical..." ??! How exactly can one claim that refusing to cite someone else's research contribution, particularly when there was a huge breakthrough with big incentivized possibilities on the table, not being cited is not unethical?? I believe they were truly paying attention, and got press and thus an opportunity to correct themselves...it is very unethical to fail to cite research contributions, unless it is an accident and, once this is pointed out, a full and profuse apology is made by the non-citers. Researchers, including me, very often do not get paid anything beyond, in the cases of Ph.D. professors, "acceptable satisfaction of publishing requirements" to keep their jobs--I don't know if there are raise calculations involved--and so it is very important to cite research and things that contribute to research whenever a publication is done. I try to do so even informally when, in the past, I published things on the internet.
> > > > I also watched the first three minutes of this:
> > > >
> > > > https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E3bLSePqCvc&feature=youtu.be
> > > >
> > > > Interestingly, I didn't know about natural selection before I was in middle school myself...it is interesting to think about different education curriculums in different countries. I think I got better at understanding it in 9th grade. Also, I was very interested in genetic algorithms in college...before I figured out how to actually solve the discrete logarithm problem, one of my early attempts was based on genetic algorithms.
> > > >
> > > > One way to view the idea of evolution speed--since you might wonder, with respect to what metric or dimension are you defining speed, or change with time?--is to think about some way to formalize the idea of "changes to the 'fitness function'" in a collection of evolving entities over generations.
> > > >
> > > > You could argue that breeding is likely to bring about "very large changes to the minimum Hamming distance between possible binary Turing machine indexes that could be used to represent each fitness function." I don't actually know that much about biological evolution--is it just the genetic code that evolves and mutates, or is there more to it than that??--but I think my idea is good.
> > > >
> > > > Just so you know, I count that as "discussion of STEM ideas," not publication of anything truly new or revolutionary. I.e., I am talking about something I know in STEM, not trying to "serve anyone" with more valuable research disclosures.
> > > An amusing thing I just realized: It is almost certainly true that Abigail Spanberger has actually *never* worked for the CIA, and made up the whole claim to bolster career as a political leader. It sounds like she did not get a job there...I realized that there is something that she would definitely know if she had successfully obtained a TS/SCI clearance at that particular agency. It's actually quite funny.
> > I just realized that Stephen Cook and probably Kaveh Ghasemloo are probably good guys, and that Neil Immerman, although he proved P = NP in the 1980's, and Michael Sipser are likely bad guys who supported trafficking me.. Timothy Chow is of course also bad. It would also appear that Sara More, the professor who gave a talk to the math department introducing me to the discrete logarithm problem, was also actually a bad guy all along, although that talk did influence me in a good way and launch my research career. All of the UMW professors, including math and CS professors, and all of the UVA professors that I briefly saw at an engineering building there when I took the GREs, which might have had my score modified by the bot, were all evil and supportive of the bad-guy government efforts to surveil and enslave and torture me, too. Additionally, all of the psych and other doctors I saw outside of Dr. Steg were evil, before I saw Dr. K, including Welton and others...basically, I won't say how I know but it is not illegal for me to say it, all of them would have *tried* to get in touch with me if they hadn't supported trafficking and torturing me, like the child predators that they all always were, and I would have found out about the effort...I am now at a point where I can *prove* that they were bad guys felons who were against me, but I refuse to say how i know.
> >
> > So that is my update for now.
> Quote of the evening:
>
> "News flash, Jennifer Polacks (that's all of you): None of you are 'cute and funny' like you think, all of you are pathetic pedophiles, who should be locked away or shot in the head and thrown in a ditch, whichever you make easier and more convenient for normal people who care about normal things and aren't idiotic freaks that no one has ever liked."

On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 8:04:54 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:52:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:43:16 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:25:33 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 4:44:00 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 4:35:29 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 2:06:33 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 12:18:11 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 11:48:48 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:00:40 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 10:15:18 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 9:40:36 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 9:07:21 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 8:11:18 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 7:48:21 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 7:38:38 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 4:14:31 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 3:33:40 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:59:36 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:56:42 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 10:50:01 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 12:30:35 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 12:03:27 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 11:33:28 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 10:40:48 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 9:50:02 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 9:45:56 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 7:29:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 6:38:09 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 5:07:15 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:41:22 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:40:14 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:31:28 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:24:38 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 2:29:02 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 2:25:34 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 1:40:22 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 12:14:30 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 12:05:02 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 11:52:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 10:34:20 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:54:20 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:12:54 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:08:43 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 7:03:13 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 7:00:27 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 2:39:55 PM UTC-5, B.H. wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 12:44:04 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, February 25, 2023 at 11:15:19 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ...the bot shot down my post again, but I thought to copy it before I posted it, so I can still paste it below:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just had a totally great idea just now! I was reflecting on the fact that I recently devise two very excellent STEM-based ideas for figuring out how to predict the stock market. I also have devised some great STEM-based ideas for how to communicate well, especially in writing...that project of devising more such ideas is ongoing.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Then, it occurred to me, based on some of my notes about my recent chess games: I could get into using STEM ideas to analyze and especially improve my performance at chess and running.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I decided to go back to Deep Run Park to start doing at least a little bit of running, now without music, starting tomorrow. I will still walk at the mall, because I don't find walking at DRP to be relaxing given all the weird people who show up there. Anyway, that is my new plan for what to do with my time now...I have been feeling fine, did well today, and felt less restricted and more "able to not have to be 'calming down' at night to feel OK," than I had felt in the past. The bot choking affected me only minimally, my mood was still much better than it had been in the 2 weeks preceding.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, that is my update for now. I feel a little unhappy that I am probably going to be known only as a writer, and not a science publisher, but think that is the right decision for me. I will get credit for writing, and I might branch into "persuasive/quasi-political non-fiction," as opposed to "here-you-go-America-free-service" non-fiction, as I was sort of thinking of doing at first. I really doubt I will change my mind, the decision, which seems quite right, is still just slowly sinking in...I am very likely to be a writer, full-time, and pour my STEM ideas into that, not any "sharing of secret family-enabling math ideas."
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I will get more used to the idea and enthusiastic about it after it has been sinking in for a few days or weeks.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > After reviewing my job applications again, I am ready to say that I'm cautiously optimistic that I will get a job. I am not sure, but I am eagerly anticipating hearing back from one or more of the employers that I applied to in this next upcoming week.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Today, I'm going to do my usual things--not really start in until 2, although it's kind of boring to just do nothing for so many hours when I keep waking up at around 10 or so...I woke up in the middle of the night last night with a very fast heart rate, but it settled down and was fine, it's probably related to past bot conditioning attempts, and my cardio is good enough that I will be fine I'm sure.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm going to do my run, and start investigating "performance enhancement science" ideas...I'm pretty sure I will be the most competitive person in the world at that, as well as at, in general, physics, computer science, mathematics, statistics, communication, and writing. Hopefully I will get my chess game and exercise abilities in top-notch shape, too!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I believe I get it...I understand something...anyway, I decided to skip running for today after all, and focus on other "research-related activities."
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I will do great, and my plans at this point haven't really changed.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A quick comment about a new understanding I have of my CIA opponents: They think that their attention to detail, thoroughness in planning, and very aggressive engineering efforts will, once demonstrated, somehow "break my morale" because (they think) "I am immoral" because "I am mentally ill and not Christian," and I do not acknowledge them as being above me in any way morally--for sure, given how they act. Basically, they have been continually baffled by how their aggressive demonstrations have led to me absorbing and reverse engineering a lot of their most valued secret technologies, including ones that I find knowledge of to be extremely useful to me and that I do not wish to repeat, even though I could since it is not my disclosure of classified information (is it classified?) that is being readily passed to unauthorized persons, that is what they are doing. The compartment of the CIA that is supervising in a way what is happening is apparently very much unaware of some of the secret technologies I have learned about, simply by spectating and watching their absurd, inappropriate theatrics.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just felt like saying that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > In short, it seems like almost nothing will stop the CIA from illegally leaking many of their most valuable classified secrets to me, rather frequently, without my consent or permission. I am being very unusually educated, and I did not ask to be.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Another thing I realized about Richard Darkins' comment: If people in the US are familiar with me and Biden's attacks on me, then if they really think that Biden is going to succeed at continuing to bother me, given how many times he has lied and how I have been perfectly honest and the fact that honesty is a trait and the five-factor model is established science, then such people clearly do not understand or do not accept the science of the five-factor model.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I learned a lot more important and interesting things today.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My updates list of activities in the future is now:
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - publishing writing (fiction and maybe non-fiction)--no STEM or writing code at all
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - investing, based on scientific principles and not computer algorithms
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - day job (I might not reveal where I would be moving or what industry it is, given the levels of harassment and friendliness around here)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - boxing (I think it is a good idea for me to pursue a sport in my free time, not just exercise)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - continuing private science research that I will not share to fuel my other endeavors
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I *think* I will still be able to Africa, probably in a number of years rather than right away. You will note, I am avoiding things that are unfairly "access denied" activities for minority people and others who face discrimination. My plans are perfectly ethical and benevolent. I will persist in my efforts to help Africa, and also likely to help out in whatever community I am able to settle in comfortably.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On a personal and psychological note: As I noted, I recently became aware that a lot of things can be addicting. I've done a good, perfect-track-record job of stopping watching adult videos and stopping listening to modern music on purpose, cold turkey. Today, I noticed that I was feeling a little bit different and more absorbed in my own thinking, partly in a good way, but I think it is because I have been doing too many gaming activities, especially playing "Space Trader Merchant Marine," which is actually a really fun game--I beat the whole 5-level campaign part of the game, and today, I finished the first two "challenge" sections of the game...I think there are three sections of the challenge thing total. Anyway, I think I'm spending too much time on gaming, and I need to take a break. I said it was for therapeutic reasons, and I don't want to over-do it. I am also going to not play chess for a while. I didn't play today, but I was playing lots of games in the past few days before that...in the future, I will probably limit my chess activity to weekends. I'll probably still play a lot of games, but just in a few segments. I had been playing games with 10 minutes per side, and I was doing it for practice. I got tired quickly in many cases.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Thus, I have decided to stop all gaming activities for the next 3 days. In four days, I'll evaluate and see if I want to start up again, or if I'm doing fine without it. I might eventually finish the last challenge thing in STMM, but I don't want to mess up my health, particularly at a sensitive time like this for me, when I'm still being assaulted by bots sometimes, even choked at night, with the full and extremely inappropriate support of Congress.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I know what I'm going to be working on for the next few days also. I'm planning out what to do while I wait to hear back regarding my job search. I applied to about 10 jobs, and I decided that I won't apply to more jobs...I believe I'm qualified, and there shouldn't be any reason why I wouldn't hear back from the employers even just having applied to 10 jobs. If my "email interview" rate is less than 10%, something is wrong anyway.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK...I'm done with everything I was going to do tonight, really. I have a little bit more food to eat, I'm going to try to relax and feel good, hopefully I'll get a good night of sleep without bot interruptions, and I am looking forward to having a peaceful day tomorrow...maybe I'll get a phone interview request since it's Monday, we'll see! I am trying to be optimistic and good-natured.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Some sort of random thoughts: I have started to feel as though I do not like the websites youtube.com or cnn.com visually. I wonder if that is a psychological thing, since I don't use YouTube for modern music any more. I sort of don't like logging in to YouTube sometimes, just because I don't want to have to look at the web design of that website.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I have a pleasant enough day planned for tomorrow. I have decided that I will not be traveling anywhere far until I can get a job. My only work task tomorrow is going to be working on a STEM-based art, writing, and communication idea tomorrow...it should be interesting, even though I really only have an hour set aside for that work, and no time set aside for any other work. (I'll probably have to stock up on groceries again tomorrow.)
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It might be a challenge to find things to do until 2 p.m. when I wake up, since I'm not doing any gaming activities for 3 days. Maybe I should try to think of something to do if I wake up at around 10 or 11, which I probably will. I would want to do something relaxing and low-stress...hmmmm....I don't think I should get involved in doing anything on the internet, and I don't really feel like reading...Shift is a fine novel and I'm some number of chapters into it, but I don't want to keep reading it right now. No gaming, so that basically rules out everything on the computer other than typing, since I said no internet. Hmmm...maybe I could drive somewhere, but I don't want to over do the trips to the mall for walking, 1 or 2 a day seems to be enough. Also, my typical thing to do for now is sort of "act like I haven't woken up until 2" since I am trying to be nice to myself for sleeping better and having woken up early, so I have been typically not eating or showering until 2. I don't think I want to exercise in the mornings...what shall I do? I already told Rosey that I am going to try to space out my visits with her to be only about once every two weeks, which she seemed to approve of, along with my other (perfectly legal to make) disclosures about IC/military technology to her that may help her understand household life better. AFAIK, Rosey understands a lot of English quite well...I think she has some ability to learn words from reading emotional cues, I don't think she understands every single thing I say, but I sort of think she knows how to "prioritize her attention" based on tone-of-voice cues, and I bet she can kind of tell if I'm just saying some sort of "generic 'good girl! what a good puppy!'" kind of thing, and when I'm saying something more content-heavy that she should try to parse the words of. That is just my guess though.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I also do not want to try to watch any TV shows. I think what I should do is some sort of "fun, easy, relaxing, psychological health activity"...something I can just type about and not get too "new STEM heavy" with, but just some sort of simple enough prompt-based idea for thinking of something to say about myself and the interactions I've had in some way that could maybe help my psychological health, particularly in terms of decreasing stress and anxiety and "ghost feelings of upsetness" that I can't explain. That is probably what I will do tomorrow...I'll probably try to design a prompt for that tonight and write it down on my computer, and then consider doing that tomorrow early on if I'm up early.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Hopefully I can think of something sort of mildly original and different from the usual psych activities I have done in the past.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Yo, I just have to let you know right now...the truth is, I thought of the 'Calculus Man' joke before anyone else, it was my idea. Everything else? It was exchanged for that joke by the creators of Superman. I'll show myself out now."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Something occurred to me this evening...probably, Sasha Burkhoff, whose names sounds like it was selected by her parents to sound like "the perfect name for a well-respected cryptologist," and thus a possible prospect as as NSA recruit as a mentally healthy student who had attended TJHSST in Virginia, had her brain-tumor-caused murder orchestrated initially by pro-life activists. According to my analysis, there is no other reason or group who would do it. I never actually spoke with Sasha, just saw and much later thought to recall a look she gave me when I think she had been diagnosed by the brain tumor, but I didn't have a strong emotional reaction, not that I was unkind or inappropriate about it in any way, but my sense of it is, she sounds like a target of pro-life religious extremists who didn't like TJHSST in general, didn't feel it was worth to murder me--they surely faced counter-attacks, probably including lethal ones, for their actions--since I was set up to be tortured as a math slave for years, and they could only pick out one student to kill to send a message about the NSA and the types of extremist fighters whom they might have felt would work there...in theory...so my sense of it is, even if she was a religious Christian and supported pro-life positions, she might have been targeted for not being "tough enough" on pro-choicer's, like my grandmother, who was kind to me although I am a liberal atheist...she even tried to not speak to me too much when I was physically present in the house, apparently that doesn't suffice for the extremists. Anyway, it is also certainly possible that Sasha was actively pro-choice. I think my theory is right. Relatedly, probably, Heath Ledger was murdered over some sort of political cause he had supported in a movie before The Dark Knight...I don't know what that would be, but my guess is, judging from Julia Stiles's comments about Ledger and Chrissy Teigen, who emotionally abused and harassed a gay man, according to what I read, he probably supported gay rights much more than actresses like Maggie Gylenhall and Julia Stiles felt comfortable...probably more "pro-choice, that's it, I just say I'm liberal" types.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, I realized that Dr. Kudurogianis was not evil...he is also facing threats, I'm sure, and did the amount of helpful psychiatric work that he felt he would be able to do safely...I think he omitted some "emotional distress" and "employment/socialization" issues due to reasons I would not understand, perhaps related to his safety or something else. I think it is fairly clear that the psychiatric treatment that he did helped me a lot...if I become suspicious that he was actually evil once again, based on me having noticed some detail that I hadn't seen before, I will probably be sure to post my latest theory about that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Great news for people who are on my side! I spent this morning beginning and planning out further work on a "STEM-based system for recovering psychologically from harassment attacks," so that I can use some of my best secret ideas to identify cognitive issues I may be having, including with "inclinations to snap at other angrily," feeling restricted from doing certain things for no good reason, not caring enough and feeling callous about people whom I'm trying to care about and ought to care about, and other issues, and use my competitively excellent ideas to work on "fixing the damage to my mind muscles/processes" so that I can "exercise those muscles" healthily and without pain so that I can get them to be stronger and working properly, as they were in the past and should be for my health and sense of identity/self-concept. Also good news: I think that given local residents' plots to sabotage me psychologically for whatever weird reason, this announcement will demoralize them, and my announcement that it will demoralize them will likely vex them if they want to start up more strange "Wile E. Coyote schemes" to "trick and deceive and psychologically 'hex'" me to feel or perform in a way that is not my best. I.e., I think they will start to realize that their weird and freaky endeavors to mess with me are not a good investment of their time, and they'll sense the regret and unhappiness they will feel later when they see that it didn't work and was all just a frankly pathetic waste of their time, and their movement to bother me will lose enthusiasm.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, my psychology activity for this morning was a big success! I have planned some more work on it to do tomorrow, during my main hours of activity during the day, after 2 p.m.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A comment about this ordeal: I note that there were *very many* people who, in this crisis situation for me, were essentially required to do enough of their part to "give me the password" to get out of trouble. A lot of people refused, in some cases citing right-wing extremist ideology, and in other cases citing threats to them and their families. The thing about the latter situation is, basically, a lot of people "passed the burden" to my family leading to at least two relatives dying, very likely murdered by the CIA, while the other people "wanted to play it safe." I.e., by not doing their jobs, they aggressively and inappropriately passed the "lack of safety burden" from their families to mine, causing damage. Thus, the "right to be outraged and to retaliate" lies with the people who are in my family who are unethical, not with them. Basically, the JACM, Cornell, and Cambridge University in Britain, murdered my grandmother and my uncle, citing, in a sense ,a desire to be safe by virtue of having a good, sustained relationship with political terrorists and mobsters in the CIA, who illegally kill innocent people to seek to pursue their political will.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said "people in my family who are ethical," that's an inserted typo.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Oh, Publix just started discriminating against me today...how original and surprising. I CuRrEnTlY have a very thick skin about this sort of thing, and it doesn't bother me or affect me that much...I will keep shopping there for now while I still live in this dumb area. It's just, "Say goodbye to all your appealing future career possibilities, Publix employees! You don't even know what you are doing professionally, at all, and the double entendre in this sentence is intended!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Regarding my job search...I can see 9 of the jobs I applied to on the panel on the job applications website; the region I applied to is in a different time zone in the USA. I am very qualified, and I applied last Wednesday. I hope I am not being locked out by another tiresome political attack on me for no reason, one that would have pointed at me no matter what I said or did, simply because I am a mentally atheist. Anyway, I only heard back from one employer so far, and they said no to my application. Hopefully I will hear more from the other employers within the next few days...how thoroughly did Donald Trump and his lieutenants seize control of the US job market??! I hope I won't wind up just sitting here, exerting political power by typing out things on Usenet, using new STEM ideas that I have that are under development that bad guys wouldn't understand because they are not able to "crack the code" of the English language! I would really prefer to be an employed private citizen, not an ongoing law-abiding anti-US-government antagonist using cutting edge STEM capabilities to trip up US political agendas pretty much every day! Gosh, I wish I could stop feeling compelled to mess with with the USA's secretly right-wing extremist, anti-Semitic, anti-Muslim, anti-atheist government for a week or two!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The US Democratic Party has never before been forced to negotiate a full, unconditional "political surrender" to anyone, have they? Well, if I'm still here in a couple months, you'll all get to find out that feels. Imagine an America with *NO LIBERALISM WHATSOEVER.* Are you excited to live in that world? Is that what you are voting for by denying my rights, or would you like to delude yourselves and side with Biden? Indeed, I *couldn't* convince the Democrats to stop hurting or be reasonable...I can't educate them on how to be smart and rational, all I can do is destroy everything everything they ever fought for, for me because I like me and I think my life and rights matter, and then keep attacking everyone, ruining everything they've gotten and fought for over the years, until they have nothing left and realize how dumb they were.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Would you be gentler in some way if I did what you did to me to one of you? No! You are doing things to me, and I haven't committed *one* crime against any of you or any of your backers. If I had eagerly served you and gotten nothing in returned, you would have tried to Auschwitz me anyway, and would not have backed no matter what. Get ready to see where this path with leads, I'm now apparently about to be your tour guide to a whole new America that you will not recognize and not like, because it will have been politically completely re-shaped by me with cutting edge science ideas, unless I am able to not face discrimination during my job search. How much is it worth to you? Did you, "everything?" Hint: Yes, and you're right! That's what it will cost. You're already paying a large percentage of the total possible cost, do you want to increase that or decrease that?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Basically, my failure was, I thought the US leaders were self-interested and smart. I thought they would be smart enough and not crazy, and would let me have my rights and let me go. I guess they are not that smart, and insist on being pummeled some more. Either that, or I'm gong to be getting interviewed sometime this week that's for sure.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Basically, at this point, if you have been a bad guy linked to the team of people who are homicidally stalking me, if you are not done with me by the end of this week and I am not actively interviewing for jobs, you will soon be done enjoying any benefits of American liberalism, period. I have the power to do that, no one else does. Did you miss what happened to Build Back Better, abortion rights, the US military's power, Biden's approval ratings, Democratic control of Congress, and even Donald Trump being used as a threat or having a viable candidacy, due to my use of my STEM powers and the US government's failure to heed my protest on behalf of my basic Constitutional rights? In that case, I even *told you fools* *exactly* what I was doing, STEM-wise. Next time, it will be a different set of excellent capabilities, and I will not tell you a think about what I'm doing, it will devastate Democrats politically, you won't be able to guess what I'm doing with algorithms or anything else, and it will all be perfectly legitimate and in accordance with the rules. Now let me go or face the consequences!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I did a great job on my STEM research task today...things are coming along extremely well, and my work is even more fun than usual. I have more such work to do tomorrow.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Regarding the conflict: To say it again another way: The clear and repeated and persistent, un-American argument of my opponents who think I should be caged and not allowed to socialize, date, or have a job, is: "We have every right to ignore the separation of church and state and freedom of religion in the US Constitution, because we would prefer to view atheists as cattle, with worthless lives, whom the government has the right to slaughter or try to slaughter, without any respect for their rights or feelings, at any time that we choose, with no regard for any laws. We may also slaughter people like cattle that we see as 'failing to dehumanize atheists' and being too friendly with them." That is the kind of extremist you've signed up to support if you're backing Biden and his cronies. You don't want to go there, it's roughly the same thing as anti-Semitism.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A couple of developments:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 1 - It looks like the mall has changed its hours, and now it closes at 7 p.m. I don't think it used to...I wonder if the Christian church that meets in two of the store-type areas had something to do with the change, to make a statement about me?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 2 - It occurred to me this evening that some time ago, someone credible hinted to me that I was likely being considered for the position of Secretary of Defense some time ago. I might have been the youngest one if my various promotions and career achievements hadn't been sabotaged! It is probably a good idea for me to mention this at this time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A dramatic reflection on my recent learning endeavors:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Ze codes, Mr. Vite. Ze codes! Now you see...velcome to schizophrenia, ze codes, zey make you genius!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I seem to be mostly out of jokes though. Remember when I said--rapped, rather:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "If I say things are like things and express opinion
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Each booty babe will fail to not become my minion"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ...remember when that seemed like it was going to be true?? What happened????!! All those comedic rap songs, and all I got was...uh...deniably video messaged by Zara Larsson and then blocked. Step up to the plate, yo! You only live once, and there's only one me. My arrogance, like so much else, knows no bounds...just as it is with my physics knowledge, I'm one of a kind! Now, in a space-time continuum sense, it is all women in the USA who are desperate, deep down, maybe unconsciously, to meet me, and not the other way around! Again, it's like Linkin Park always envisioned for me: "So [he's] waitin' until the upper hand is [his]....". Don't disrespect the prophecy, yo!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Would that I could calibrate my jokes to be funnier, for the perfect audience...forsooth.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (Yes, this again.)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, I do not actually know if Zara Larsson is a Nazi who supports murdering me for being an atheist.. I wrote above assuming she was not.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, regarding the Richard Dawkins Tweet: Here is a really good idea; I would think that every single US citizen who is currently residing in the US, has heard of me or met me and heard what happened to me, is alive and feeling well, and never supported right-wing extremism, and didn't get a chance to get in touch when I demanded to be contacted between Sept 2020 and the present, ought to send me an email, at least wishing me well, maybe offering to see if there is anything such a person could do to help me, given that I will have basically just gotten out of a de facto American (??!) concentration camp.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The obvious question about why any such person who would read this and then not get in touch with me is, "Why not?," and it would tend to suggest that such a person, given my insistence and biography and status as a virtuous bipolar American atheist, would either feel "extremely threatened by a still-tyrannical US government," or, more likely, would be a "radicalized right-wing extremist residing in America who supports ethnic cleanings operations, against the mentally ill, against atheists, and against black people residing in Africa." Otherwise, why wouldn't such a person at least send a quick email checking it? It would seem to suggest some sort of "mass radicalization epidemic" that hit the USA, that would have hit the people who refused to contact me, and that there is indeed, as Fox News suggested when speaking of a "silent majority," that a very large number of people in the USA have apparently converted to fascism. Otherwise, I would receive at least a quick "glad you're feeling better' email for sure, from everyone who had heard of me, given that I would be like Anne Frank if she had managed to just finish escaping from a Nazi concentration camp...surely all of the people who wished her well and didn't support her being tortured and murdered by Nazis would want to send her an email congratulating her on her escape and wishing her well? There could be no other explanation, of course.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK, so I am going to go to bed soon. I am pleased that, looking at the text I've written and the lack of any coherent response to it or accusation from government officials or anyone else with authority, it is clear that it has been clear, for months now, that I am totally and 100% a victim of right-wing extremists in government and beyond...I am not a bad guy and never deserved this. So that is good.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, my science projects are going well. I am feeling a little bit mildly restless at night--it is hard to tell how much of that is due to the wake-ups from the government-linked bad guys--but mostly I feel fine each day. Just bored, ready for things to change so that I can get out of here and have a real, normal life as I and other innocent people deserve to have. I am one of the smartest and most talented people in the world now, so in spite of my set backs, I am a fairly fortunate person in terms of talent and long-term (decades-type term) outcome...I'm sure I'll be doing great in my 40's, I'll just be a little bit older and past my prime physically. Mentally, I'll surely still be the best theorem prover in the world, and that will be the source of my talent, which I'll be sure to stockpile and keep to myself.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So...I am trying to think of ways to relax at night. I looked at the YouTube videos again, and in spite of my different viewing choices, they are all completely *useless*, the recommendations totally suck and it is unpleasant even looking at the thumbnails on the main page. Now that I'm avoiding Twitter due to discrimination, I am starting to feel like groups.google.com is the only site I ever want to visit, except for maybe checking my email accounts on Yahoo and Gmail, and also occasionally glancing at cnn.com, which is also a crap website, but I ought to know a few of the top headlines that are not being covered up at any given time. So yeah. I am finding writing in my offline files to be more productive and interesting than anything there is to do online. I like typing in my offline files and walking, and eating, and I wish I could socialize and date and maybe have sex. Other than that, I'm not all that limited...I can't do work for money yet, perhaps due to government limitations, but I can still exert more political and other power than anyone else in the world...I'll have all my latest ideas set up and ready to use soon, and I'll just type what I want to type on Usenet, and see how that goes. It should have an impact, and again, it won't be unethical or against the law...I'll be sure. So my "job," coming soon if I'm not released or employed, will be writing appropriate STEM-backed posts, in captivity, on the internet to continue to exert my political will on the world. I should be allowed to socialize and friends--I'm a perfectly nice and quite normal person, I follow the rules, don't do anything wrong, just file complaints about the epidemic of weirdos bothering me and never start fights, always do the right thing, never do any weird or creepy/strange things to other people like try to "scare them" or follow them around or harass them, always behave appropriately and like I should. Anyway, I'll see where this ends pretty soon I'm sure....the bad guys, I don't think, can take many more losses...I mean they can, but they really wouldn't look like they are even employed if they keep pushing with this, I don't get how such high-power leaders of the US, in such a competitive field, can be so completely stupid, irrational, nakedly and publicly pro-extremism and pro-terrorism, and able to still maintain approval ratings of about 30%. I admit, I'm quite stunned by that capability...how can such incompetent figure out a way to keep their jobs without ever doing them, how on earth do they do that? I'm not jealous and don't want to copy that, but the example is stunning and interesting in its own right, like Caligula's success as a Roman leader.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Once again, I am thinking some more about Richard Dawkins' Tweet. Liar drops R; maybe that means, Joe Biden drops Regency Mall, without the monolith, i.e., I will get hired based on the region I correctly applied to. If so, great! That will be excellent. My usual "Donkey Kong dance," not that I think mentally ill people should be considered apes, but I'm thinking of the "aggressive impactful stomping" of sorts, before big event relevant to me that might be sabotaged that may require a "vocally aggressive send-off to the immediate predecessor time" just before the full result is in, to pre-attack in case I've been "foiled again by a pinball-tilt wizard with no ethics or sense of 'gosh, that was too much, enough is enough,'" is basically contained above in some of the writing. I basically always do that, in this situation where I post a lot in public, right before I think that something big and important I'm working towards is about to possibly be sabotaged into not working right again, based on an initial "bad sign," which just be an incidental thing and nothing to worry about over all.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I'm thinking maybe I will get a job. I hope so. I'm going to turn the computer off pretty soon and get more fully ready to fall asleep.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, I am a little bit worried about: the guy with the bald head who used to also walk on Quioccasin Road who I think was mentally ill, Kristen, who sometimes walked on Quioccasin Road and seemed to have disappeared recently, and the guy that I saw who was black who seemed like he was mentally ill on Quioccasin, and the white guy who looked like he liked to wear military camouflage type of clothing and a hat whom I would see on Quioccasin road...there was also the black guy that I called "nodding head man" who used to bother me, he might have been mentally ill, and maybe I shouldn't blame him for having bothered me by nodding his fast when I was very much more sensitive and messed up due, I think, to trauma-related mental illness. Is anyone going to help them if they are still in trouble and not where they want to be in life yet? They looked like they were totally shunned by the local community and very under-supported, if they did indeed have mental health problems...probably they weren't even all identifying as atheists. I hope that my "monolith" will be their "monolith," too, i.e., that they will be able to get out of isolation, if they're in isolation in the Tuckahoe area and not already out of isolation.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A couple more comments:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Yeah I trained my "inner word-fighter persona" in melee combat with Ras al CVS. I stole the power to be extremely rude, with or without a reason of any sort.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - This morning, I noticed that my neck and shoulders felt a little weird and sort of sore, like it would feel comfortable to rest my head by tilting it to the right, like I was Stephen Hawking who was paralyzed and had his head looking like it was at an angle in his wheelchair, at least that was my perception...maybe it was not actually at much of an angle, checking the photos on Google briefly. It sounds like a nasty joke about me and atheists and highly competent STEM people, and I received a credible psych hint about the government-linked gesture doing this, suggesting that it is not a total surprise, perhaps, and a psych professional somewhere knew that a gesture of this nature would be done at some point, and maybe the perpetrator's psychological state and behavior are not necessarily hard to explain or predict, to an extent, at all. Yes, there is probably something psychological to be learned from my own initial explorations into basic amateur psychology...what did I reach for first, how is my "first-choice" lens to reach for characterized? Whatever. I'm mainly pivoting back to "easy psych ideas," just because my psych "research," amateur and not valuable/competitive or not, is mainly just to help me improve my own health for now, not to win any "innovative psychology research contests" or anything along those lines. I'm more interested in competing, vaguely speaking, at "applied math that I can use to get ahead at almost anything performance-related," in a variety of different contexts.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Remember: It is the lives of Nazis and other intolerant right-wing extremists that are worthless, not the lives of the people that they target and despise.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > youtube.com/watch?v=C9SiRNibD14&embeds_euri=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2F&source_ve_path=MjM4NTE&feature=emb_title
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yes, this video is sad. Science is a good thing--the means to power, health, safety, technological progress, and often prosperity.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, it is concerning that this woman from Africa is trying to like Newton's scientific achievements with colonization. There is no evidence that science is linked to discrimination or exploitation of minority groups or people outside of the US.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A concern is that many people would argue that people who want to support colonizing or otherwise support exploiting Africa ought to be killed, i.e., if it is not illegal in your country to kill someone who wants to support fascism or slavery-like activities, then it would not be a bad idea to kill that person, like killing a Confederate or Nazi soldier in battle; the lives of confirmed fascists are worthless, and within the constraints of US law in America, ought to be either imprisoned, killed, or otherwise removed from relevance and ideally prosperity, as soon as possible. That goes for anyone who wants to eliminate some or all people from a particular legitimate background as though they had no rights, whether the background is ethnic, religious, or something else not related to "being an evil predatory fascist."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I am hoping that she does not mean that she thinks that pro-science people should be killed. Sadly, if she adopted such a position and pushed for it, she would put herself into a very bad category. I am speaking about this because I believe that people in Africa, who may have been denied some Western educational benefits, deserve more of a chance to turn around mistaken behavior and not support hurting pro-science people, including science-interested students in school who might not thrive without education...although that is different from wanting "pro-science people killed," and she didn't say that she wanted that, I am just worried about the claimed connection between colonialism and science.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My point is that people who support murder and fascism become, after a certain possible grace period of controversial length, people with worthless lives. Most people who fought for Naziism in WW2 ought not be given a chance to "tell everyone they're sorry and repent," that's good enough. There are some fascists from different parts of history that should not be allowed out of jail for 500 years. I still oppose the death penalty avidly, but any person who converts to fascism, while not losing his or her rights as a possibly accused criminal person or not, loses the "desirability of their existence," although it might be illegal to kill them without a trial.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So my point is, do not ever join forces with fascists, no matter what opinions you may have about people from backgrounds other than your own--you may champion your beliefs and backgrounds, but never support the denial of rights or the denial of desirability of other people being alive, unless such people are fascists, i.e., people who themselves deny the desirability of being alive to others over a mere beliefs-based disagreement that does involve calling for the deaths of innocent, "maybe just wrong" people, as opposed to true fascists.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said, "that's not good enough."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Someone outside signaled me to "see Bill Gates," so I did.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > What is he saying? "PW aim [is getting close with] the world" ? What, now for the first time? Is this some sort of reverse psychology trick?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Why didn't Microsoft offer to hire me, since it understood my talent all along?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My aim is to have my own life, withhold my STEM talents as punishment for the "slavery and extraction" initiative that political terrorists backed, presumably because they didn't want me to get big at DOD because criminals in STEM business, like Zuckerberg and possibly also Gates--I don't know--might fear my rules-based leadership and top-notch talent at STEM. I also want to help Africa. Is there some sort of claim that I have been inconsistent in anything I said?? Is it claimed that my chemistry disclosure, related to BQP = P and disease cures, somehow does *not* cure cancer?? Please, check with an expert who still trusts you, if you can find one! I am definitely no longer "crank" by any measure, and I never was one, just somewhat ignorant about classical mechanics and other areas of physics--I had been quite behind on studying, now I am not--I don't have a deep understanding of relativity, general or special, but I get the very basics of QM, and I understand classical mechanics well.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Bill Gates must not smear me, or risk being seen as "just another big-money-man cheater who fought his way to the top, became 'a king of having money,' and added no value to the world," just as the excellent researcher and publisher CS Christos Papadimitriou seems to have predicted, sort of.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I *will* help Africa if I can make the money. Why wouldn't I? Is it claimed that I cannot, that I don't have the will to spend money on such things? Does Gates actually believe that a condition for my freedom, as a brilliant, totally innocent atheist who is much better at math, CS, and engineering than he is, even as a top-ranked business leader, is that I must "serve the world" with my STEM talents, publishing free "naked photos of all the things that make me powerful," so that he can make money from them and not I? I've given more than enough free STEM gifts to the world, it is time for me to be *compensated* for my work, and also, well past time for me to be liberated--unlike Gates, I've never been credibly accused of committing a serious crime.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe Gates is questioning why I have lost interest in STEM. Oh, is he pretending that he doesn't know a certain fact about computers, or does he actually not know?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, if Gates is not a fascist or homicidal criminal at least, I *demand* his full support for my release. He should have offered to buy my IP, but not being a likely candidate for being ethical, he probably would never do that. I have nothing to fear from a "lacking Bill Gates like" as long as I do not work as a STEM worker in the STEM industry; his "like" is irrelevant in my new chosen field.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A question about the local community:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Are most citizens in the Tuckahoe area *actually* claiming that they "don't really have free speech rights or the right to peaceably assemble near me," or is that another fake-out attempt? If they believe that, do they accept that, and is their defense against further curtailments against their rights, due to their crimes, that "no one has the capability to do anything to us, so we're just going to keep doing our way?" I think that attitude will not get a good outcome; no one wants to tell you how certain techniques for dealing with "right-wing bad guy daredevils" are sometimes used to fight back.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Whatever that other post says on my thread, I am not reading it.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, the Little League tragedy of today is, Publix once again was deliberately out of YoCrunch (they claimed credit for it yesterday). Clearly, there is only one question about this situation: Will I, or will I not, get into volunteer "Retail Rap" under the rapper name, "Cashier Fatherf---er For Fun," and how many cashier careers will I mercilessly ruin with the awesome power of the pen?? IS there a limit to how much damage I can enjoy myself while sustaining it and waiting for whatever to happen? Who knew hurting bad-guy people's lives could be so fun???
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yo, I gotta start right there, I can't just leave that hanging, yo....
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > UNTITLED RAP
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > by Cashier Fatherf---er For Fun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yo, my name is Manheim, they think they're Julia Right
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A Stiles motherpredecessor, ring it up as a fight, yo...
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I can't delete losers as fast as I shop, but
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I would compete to get losers' heads on a justice chopping block
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > You know, I am an artist--my words are OK--because, I
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Fight relentlessly to just prove I'm still not gay, because I
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Am gay deep down, unless it's a statement to show, that
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm not intimidated by deletions of Yo-
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Crunch, um, you knew that was coming 'cause I rap about me
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I channel adrenaline and I charge a fee, you see
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The metaphorical gun flash but you think there's no gun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > And yeah, it's just a metaphor, I smoked you for fun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > [begin snare]
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm not Obama--I just snort Confederates when stuck on an island
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > If I write aggressive raps and die will they scream, "Oh, why, man??!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Does anyone miss anyone without a new rap atmosphere?--no.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I thought I proved to them my strength is from being non-sex-queer, though.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quirky adrenaline, you'll never trace it down, guys
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I spurt technologies, and you lose blood like dead flies
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > You sign up for death and more death and I'm totally blameless
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I thought He'd cancel you, but everyone's shameless.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > [guitar solo]
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I need an outro that returns to the central
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Theme of my rap which is that you are all no-go's
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I use that word and not the p-slur--I'm perfect
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Still bag the groceries miss, your life is now worthless.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > That's my rap song! What do you think? I feel comfortable asserting that viciously insulting intransigent law breaker cashiers is not harassment or stalking, as long as I don't name names or say anything directly in public. I have a right to make political speech, in the form of art, whether your like it or not. A lot of people are saying that they hate me for stupid reasons, why not get more insulting, see if they like it more? Maybe some professional rapper will come out and say how much they hate me too, I'll be sure to quiver. Also, I'm still under duress, as anyone can see! The hate-fueled nightmare is supposed to never end according to them, I don't have to persuade you, if you don't know how to think, it's your graves, Confederacy punks! Fascists always lose! Don't delude yourselves about exactly what you are! Note, retail work is fine, if you do it WITHOUT trying to intimidate, harass, gaslight, or discriminate against people. Let's see how juiced up Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren will get this time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > That was fun. Now on to other things.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yeah that's right I was actually mean, once. What!!!!!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > No I am not going to publish any new STEM ideas to help the military or other goons. I'm immune to all manipulative tricks, I'm done outputting STEM, forever, you're on your own, losers.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm starting to worry that Biden shut down my job search in another state, too. The job was one I was extremely qualified for, and I still haven't heard anything positive from any of the jobs I applied to.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > So...do all geographic regions in the USA support the idea that Biden is completely control of law-abiding, intelligent religious minorities' members being able to get a job, literally anywhere? Can Biden shut down good career moves for any atheist in the USA? I suspect that the answer is yes, and no one will talk about it...I hope something really nasty and permanent happens to the people who are making sleazy deals of this nature, in clear support of anti-atheist fascism.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway...I don't know what to do next, I have fought and worked as hard as almost anyone ever could, but just as Einstein would have trouble getting out of a concentration camp if he had stayed in Germany for too long, all my talents and work and digging deep, and really exerting myself to try to look out for myself and exercise my legal rights and get a good job have thwarted by vastly populated legions, sadly, of American right-wing extremists. They are not being challenged enough, they have largely taken over the economy of the country, and contrary to my initial belief, it looks like they do not merely control STEM and retail.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > FYI, I am not saying it is a Jewish conspiracy, in case someone thinks that I sound like some sort of bad guy who is claiming that "Jews are trying to control everything." It is not Jewish people, it is American political crooks. WHEN will they cut this out? It has been almost 12 years, I tried asking nicely and appealing to reason and the evidence and my innocence, I tried demonstrations of my STEM talent and was just smeared (e.g., with the Hodge Conjecture, my logic result, the twin prime conjecture, etc.), I finally resorted to aggressively attacking the fascist leaders who are perpetrating this...what am I supposed to do? What is any person in my position, being innocent and just mentally ill and an atheist, supposed to do to get away from extra-judicial assaults and "containment efforts" made against by government-employed fascists?? Someone is supposed to fix this! I could warn of the consequences--some of them have already been faced--but I am growing tired of that. Don't try to convert the USA to a racist dictatorship, that is not good for anyone. Leave me alone and let me work!!! Fascists deserve death, not liberals!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > I just realized something: The government still thinks it's going to use "stress" and "psychological manipulation" to manipulate my mood and feelings, and put me in great distress--probably with a few more "false hope" things, then "choking incidents," then "weird and confusing signals that seem to be about something important...but what are they really saying?", and try to manipulate me into changing my mind into publishing more STEM.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > In the past, I definitely changed my mind about publishing differential equations--I thought it would help, and it probably did...it probably ended the US's ability to be a navy and air force superpower, basically permanently, unless more help would be provided by me.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > I do not share things at random. I try to do what is in my interests, whether I'm stressed out and desperate (I probably won't be in the near future at all) or not. I have done a really good job on working on being able to relax. I AM NOT GOING TO PUBLISH ANY MORE STEM. I made sure, after I changed my mind on diff eq publication, to also change my mind and "declare law-abiding war on the US Department of Defense," and I did that, and I won...I tossed them a breakable code using BPP = P, and they can use it, but it doesn't matter--all their secret things were lost to their adversaries via flight surveillance and cryptology during the no-codes phase.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > I won the war on DOD, they just want to deny it, and now shower THEMSELVES with false hope and optimism, thinking that they are "such great Christian guys, of COURSE they'll get it back, the US NEVER loses like this," precisely because the US has never been this morally wrong-headed or right-wing and extremist before; the US declared war on terrorism in 2001, and thus itself in the near future--today.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > I WILL NEVER PUBLISH MORE STEM TO HELP THE GOVERNMENT FOR ANY OTHER REASON. It is over, I am keeping it to myself to fuel other endeavors, I am *never* going to try to help *anyone*, other than my own children, with STEM sharing or explanation efforts, EVER AGAIN.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe that will clarify some things.
> > > > > > > > > > > > My day today was fairly pleasant. I had to go to Food Lion to get YoCrunch because Publix still wouldn't stock it...whatever. I will probably write more "rather absurd rap songs" to exercise my sense of humor, since I can't even talk right now, but I'll probably be more light-hearted and less mean in the future.
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > Somewhat disappointingly, my schedule for my day tomorrow is basically exactly the same as my schedule for today. I worked for more than an hour on my math research task today, which was great and yielded some good ideas. I am still continuing the same research tomorrow, and I might do it for at most 2 more days before I move on. I am only doing real work for 1-2 hours a day right now, and I'm still on my gaming break. I might stay on that, unless I get more headaches soon.
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > I am starting to think that the end of this will have nothing to do with getting the job I was trying to get from the job search. Do I have to wait for the government to relent? What about waiting for the wildly nutty local citizens to relent? I don't see what they are thinking or afraid of or doing, why are they *all* *still* siding with fascist ideologies, do they think they will get some sort of warmth and protection from that? That is not a good move, side with the truth, good values, patriotism, the US Constitution, and me, not code-talking terrorist linked insider threat bad guys who "have a job in the government." I had a job in the government, let me tell you, that helps you 0% with law enforcement, whether you mention it or not, if you get arrested or TDO'd (I have never been arrested, but I have been TDO'd, twice by police, sometimes even improperly, shortly after quitting jobs as an NSA contractor...it changes nothing, which is how it is supposed to work). I.e., even if you think you have power from a government position and try to abuse it, the police will just ignore that.. It's just a job, it's not a magical "becoming a king or queen" ceremony, you really shouldn't see government employees as "larger than life," they're mostly very inefficient and ineffective at getting things done at the office.
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > So anyway...I am trying to be calm, since it's getting late. I am trying to relax and not vent any more angry feelings or "creative interpretations for debate/persuasion/etc." about this nonsense. I wonder what it will take for me to be spoken to again? I don't know. I might take a break from all work pretty soon, but then I wouldn't know what to do with all my time.
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > Yeah, I wonder what the end of this will look like. Which will happen first? Will local residents come to their senses and stop backing fascists and code-talking liars? Will I get a job? Will someone from another state or another country write to me? Will the DOD write to me to apologize for their huge mistake/crime? Will the news run a story forcing a bad US political leader to resign, decreasing interest in this "project?" I don't know, but I've waited for over a decade for justice and access to my Constitutional rights!! What a farce, I don't know for sure what exactly these people are thinking.
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I'm going to try to have a pleasant night.
> > > > > > > > > > > So, now that night-time is here, I note I would probably feel more relaxed if I typed something relaxing. Who knows why. I should be high-energy and full of comments and ideas and even a little bit of aggression during the day--I just remembered that I said I was going to stop being aggressive, but it is sometimes hard to remember all the different changes I wanted to make to improve my psych health, it's not that important that I stick to that, it is just important that I never publish STEM again.
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I think the "monolith" is: Regency Mall drops Regency, i.e., when the local mall loses its administrative authority given to it on behalf of a monarch. What authority is that? What exactly can they do? I think Dawkins' subsequent comment, which came out to "clatter lordie," suggests that the Christian church there got investigated for extremism after my comment...I did see a little bit of evidence of that, some man inside one of their areas made a sort-of Nazi salute gesture at me, I mainly just ignored that, that sort of thing is pretty common around here.
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > Maybe I should disclose more strange mall activity?....they keep sending groups of young men with one overweight chesty woman by to say things, the group today yelled "penis" when I looked at them, and the woman made eye contact with me and said something like "bye bye Kyle," which is the first name of a male patient at Dominion Hospital that I went to see Dr. Steg in 2001. Maybe it helps to repeat these things, I don't know. I heard some other man say "bye Felicia" loudly a while ago, a number of days ago, at the mall. I heard a woman who looked pretty and might have been Hispanic talking on the phone, near the "escape rooms" thing with her group of friends, and I heard her say, "I have a reservation" over the phone, perhaps she was from out of town.
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > Last time with the overweight chesty woman, the code was something like "a cost" then "most sag" and then the code had like "two sniffles" after that, I don't know what they were trying to say. Whatever, I don't get the point or message of what they're trying to do, it sounds unfriendly. I saw a group of teenagers coming by, and they made some sort of like aggressive gesture while looking at me, like, "WHAT?!", and I didn't pay that much attention to them.
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > There was a large group of people singing in the Christian church area a few days ago. Today, a black man in a Harvard sweatshirt came out of the bottom of the elevator, holding a staff or stick or whatever. Today, I saw a security guy on one of those electronic rolling segue thing, making some sort of gesture. I saw a guy like that working for security before; he did that when I first started walking there, then the next a different security guy started quickly shaking his head at me, then I complained, then there were two security workers sitting at a desk, and one of them sort of "put their hands up," a lot like one of the female workers at Food Lion did one time. I don't know the gang codes at all, I'm just posting to maybe help "drop the regency of Regency Mall," maybe it will work!
> > > > > > > > > > Actually, no, DOS, "roboticdeepthroatconditioning.mil" is not a good idea for a web-based app for your upcoming startup. Get a little more creative, there actually are some fascists out there who are even better at thinking and science than you.
> > > > > > > > > Rap About Walking In the RVA Area, Etc.
> > > > > > > > > by Broom Philip
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > I've got to find a place to walk every day
> > > > > > > > > The FBI is like shut down, so criminals may
> > > > > > > > > Do what they want to do whenever they want
> > > > > > > > > Follow me through shopping malls, grocery stores, and Deep Run Park
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > So I am writing a rap to kill some time, you know
> > > > > > > > > I see the anarchists have killed fighting crime, and so
> > > > > > > > > My free time's spent on research food and health
> > > > > > > > > While the world is acting like it's favored by stealth
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > They think the secret spies stalk their enemies better
> > > > > > > > > If they can't see it, they think, it makes women wetter
> > > > > > > > > The movie-like atmosphere of intriguing spy pirates
> > > > > > > > > Is, they think, the beauty of all violence in silence
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > The rap is weak today 'cause it's just a drill
> > > > > > > > > You'd rather have just me and not the FBI chill, but
> > > > > > > > > Indeed you wanted Sin City but got Gotham instead
> > > > > > > > > You think you're safest when your eyes are closed in bed
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > My self-expression requires no apology, now
> > > > > > > > > They changed god to mysteriousness in their brand new theology, now
> > > > > > > > > The Christian church no longer has its true savior
> > > > > > > > > And, they think forgiveness green lights every behavior.
> > > > > > > > Here is my latest prediction of how it will end: On March 14 or so, 18 days after Dawkins' Tweet, Biden has predicted in public in code that Vladimir Putin will be killed by a US-linked drone strike, and then Biden's approval ratings will go up and he'll look more likely to win the 2024 election. The truth is, though, the capabilities to be dominant, air-force-wise, over Russia have been removed for the US; they cannot possibly have the power to do that sort of assassination any more--no country has that kind of power any more, at least not over the top developed nations with the GDP to support "the standard air force." Perhaps the bad guys will finally drop me and admit assaulting me wasn't worth it, even taking morality out of the equation. *Hopefully* they will regain a sliver of their sanity.
> > > > > > > Update regarding my job search: I think I did apply to the right region--a place that is not against, e.g., LGBTQ people--and I think that there are firms that would like to reach out to me. My guess is, some political group essentially made "huge threats" against the firms that seemed likely to communicate with me, and there is a "brief pause for a battle," that the employers will win. So far, none of the 10 or so firms I applied to have written back except one...I bet they will, and it will just take a while, due to political pressure, which one of the firms even says it does not value above equal opportunity, even in cases of stalking.
> > > > > > A comment on an excerpt from the article linked to on Richard Dawkins' Twitter:
> > > > > >
> > > > > > https://www.spectator.co.uk/article/who-really-discovered-dnas-structure/
> > > > > >
> > > > > > "This is a story replete with competition, friction, misunderstanding and some sexism, but it lacks anything truly unethical, let alone criminal. Four men and one woman, none of whom was perfect ... "
> > > > > >
> > > > > > What? "...it lacks anything truly unethical..." ??! How exactly can one claim that refusing to cite someone else's research contribution, particularly when there was a huge breakthrough with big incentivized possibilities on the table, not being cited is not unethical?? I believe they were truly paying attention, and got press and thus an opportunity to correct themselves...it is very unethical to fail to cite research contributions, unless it is an accident and, once this is pointed out, a full and profuse apology is made by the non-citers. Researchers, including me, very often do not get paid anything beyond, in the cases of Ph.D. professors, "acceptable satisfaction of publishing requirements" to keep their jobs--I don't know if there are raise calculations involved--and so it is very important to cite research and things that contribute to research whenever a publication is done. I try to do so even informally when, in the past, I published things on the internet.
> > > > > I also watched the first three minutes of this:
> > > > >
> > > > > https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E3bLSePqCvc&feature=youtu.be
> > > > >
> > > > > Interestingly, I didn't know about natural selection before I was in middle school myself...it is interesting to think about different education curriculums in different countries. I think I got better at understanding it in 9th grade. Also, I was very interested in genetic algorithms in college...before I figured out how to actually solve the discrete logarithm problem, one of my early attempts was based on genetic algorithms.
> > > > >
> > > > > One way to view the idea of evolution speed--since you might wonder, with respect to what metric or dimension are you defining speed, or change with time?--is to think about some way to formalize the idea of "changes to the 'fitness function'" in a collection of evolving entities over generations.
> > > > >
> > > > > You could argue that breeding is likely to bring about "very large changes to the minimum Hamming distance between possible binary Turing machine indexes that could be used to represent each fitness function." I don't actually know that much about biological evolution--is it just the genetic code that evolves and mutates, or is there more to it than that??--but I think my idea is good.
> > > > >
> > > > > Just so you know, I count that as "discussion of STEM ideas," not publication of anything truly new or revolutionary. I.e., I am talking about something I know in STEM, not trying to "serve anyone" with more valuable research disclosures.
> > > > An amusing thing I just realized: It is almost certainly true that Abigail Spanberger has actually *never* worked for the CIA, and made up the whole claim to bolster career as a political leader. It sounds like she did not get a job there...I realized that there is something that she would definitely know if she had successfully obtained a TS/SCI clearance at that particular agency. It's actually quite funny.
> > > I just realized that Stephen Cook and probably Kaveh Ghasemloo are probably good guys, and that Neil Immerman, although he proved P = NP in the 1980's, and Michael Sipser are likely bad guys who supported trafficking me. Timothy Chow is of course also bad. It would also appear that Sara More, the professor who gave a talk to the math department introducing me to the discrete logarithm problem, was also actually a bad guy all along, although that talk did influence me in a good way and launch my research career. All of the UMW professors, including math and CS professors, and all of the UVA professors that I briefly saw at an engineering building there when I took the GREs, which might have had my score modified by the bot, were all evil and supportive of the bad-guy government efforts to surveil and enslave and torture me, too. Additionally, all of the psych and other doctors I saw outside of Dr. Steg were evil, before I saw Dr. K, including Welton and others...basically, I won't say how I know but it is not illegal for me to say it, all of them would have *tried* to get in touch with me if they hadn't supported trafficking and torturing me, like the child predators that they all always were, and I would have found out about the effort...I am now at a point where I can *prove* that they were bad guys felons who were against me, but I refuse to say how i know.
> > >
> > > So that is my update for now.
> > Quote of the evening:
> >
> > "News flash, Jennifer Polacks (that's all of you): None of you are 'cute and funny' like you think, all of you are pathetic pedophiles, who should be locked away or shot in the head and thrown in a ditch, whichever you make easier and more convenient for normal people who care about normal things and aren't idiotic freaks that no one has ever liked."
> A few comments:
>
> - People who are fascists do have worthless lives, but they should not try to commit suicide. Instead, they should repent, be sorry, talk about what they did, try to change themselves, and try to get themselves sent to jail, so that they can pay whatever debt they have to society, whether that's life in prison or less than that.
> - Thinking about it, I do know that my father really worked for DOJ...I don't know that he actually definitely ever worked for OPR, but when I was a kid, I went to his office one time, so I know he really worked there. At the same time, I am skeptical that my mother actually got a master's degree in mathematics and economics, and worked for Booz Allen Hamilton as a defense contractor before I was born. I do not know that my mother is ever honest about anything, at this point. She had a friend, named Jacqui, whom my sister and I called "Aunt Jacqui," whom my mother claimed worked for the CIA. My mother and I and maybe my sister too visited "Aunt Jacqui's" apartment in Northern VA one time, but I'm now not sure that she actually worked for the CIA. There are a lot of things that my parents said when I was young that may not have been true...I think my family history, on my Dad's side is true, but I don't know too much about my mom's family, and many of them seem to be not possessing great values. I don't know that my Uncle Skip was in the military and electrocuted in some sort of "water and electricity related accident," and I can't be sure that my mother's father was really an electrician whom my mother "taught herself basically from his textbook which she called the 'cook book' when she was a child." My mother claims to run a tax preparation business and take many "tax courses" without having a CPA; she did always talk on the phone a lot, and I know that she claimed to have that "tax preparation business" as early as when I was 3. I don't know if any of that was true.

On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 8:07:17 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 8:04:54 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:52:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:43:16 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:25:33 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 4:44:00 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 4:35:29 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 2:06:33 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 12:18:11 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 11:48:48 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:00:40 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 10:15:18 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 9:40:36 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 9:07:21 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 8:11:18 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 7:48:21 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 7:38:38 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 4:14:31 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 3:33:40 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:59:36 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:56:42 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 10:50:01 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 12:30:35 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 12:03:27 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 11:33:28 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 10:40:48 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 9:50:02 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 9:45:56 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 7:29:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 6:38:09 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 5:07:15 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:41:22 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:40:14 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:31:28 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:24:38 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 2:29:02 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 2:25:34 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 1:40:22 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 12:14:30 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 12:05:02 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 11:52:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 10:34:20 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:54:20 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:12:54 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:08:43 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 7:03:13 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 7:00:27 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 2:39:55 PM UTC-5, B.H. wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 12:44:04 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, February 25, 2023 at 11:15:19 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ...the bot shot down my post again, but I thought to copy it before I posted it, so I can still paste it below:
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just had a totally great idea just now! I was reflecting on the fact that I recently devise two very excellent STEM-based ideas for figuring out how to predict the stock market. I also have devised some great STEM-based ideas for how to communicate well, especially in writing...that project of devising more such ideas is ongoing.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Then, it occurred to me, based on some of my notes about my recent chess games: I could get into using STEM ideas to analyze and especially improve my performance at chess and running.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I decided to go back to Deep Run Park to start doing at least a little bit of running, now without music, starting tomorrow. I will still walk at the mall, because I don't find walking at DRP to be relaxing given all the weird people who show up there. Anyway, that is my new plan for what to do with my time now...I have been feeling fine, did well today, and felt less restricted and more "able to not have to be 'calming down' at night to feel OK," than I had felt in the past. The bot choking affected me only minimally, my mood was still much better than it had been in the 2 weeks preceding.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, that is my update for now. I feel a little unhappy that I am probably going to be known only as a writer, and not a science publisher, but think that is the right decision for me. I will get credit for writing, and I might branch into "persuasive/quasi-political non-fiction," as opposed to "here-you-go-America-free-service" non-fiction, as I was sort of thinking of doing at first. I really doubt I will change my mind, the decision, which seems quite right, is still just slowly sinking in...I am very likely to be a writer, full-time, and pour my STEM ideas into that, not any "sharing of secret family-enabling math ideas."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I will get more used to the idea and enthusiastic about it after it has been sinking in for a few days or weeks.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > After reviewing my job applications again, I am ready to say that I'm cautiously optimistic that I will get a job. I am not sure, but I am eagerly anticipating hearing back from one or more of the employers that I applied to in this next upcoming week.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Today, I'm going to do my usual things--not really start in until 2, although it's kind of boring to just do nothing for so many hours when I keep waking up at around 10 or so...I woke up in the middle of the night last night with a very fast heart rate, but it settled down and was fine, it's probably related to past bot conditioning attempts, and my cardio is good enough that I will be fine I'm sure.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm going to do my run, and start investigating "performance enhancement science" ideas...I'm pretty sure I will be the most competitive person in the world at that, as well as at, in general, physics, computer science, mathematics, statistics, communication, and writing. Hopefully I will get my chess game and exercise abilities in top-notch shape, too!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I believe I get it...I understand something...anyway, I decided to skip running for today after all, and focus on other "research-related activities."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I will do great, and my plans at this point haven't really changed.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A quick comment about a new understanding I have of my CIA opponents: They think that their attention to detail, thoroughness in planning, and very aggressive engineering efforts will, once demonstrated, somehow "break my morale" because (they think) "I am immoral" because "I am mentally ill and not Christian," and I do not acknowledge them as being above me in any way morally--for sure, given how they act. Basically, they have been continually baffled by how their aggressive demonstrations have led to me absorbing and reverse engineering a lot of their most valued secret technologies, including ones that I find knowledge of to be extremely useful to me and that I do not wish to repeat, even though I could since it is not my disclosure of classified information (is it classified?) that is being readily passed to unauthorized persons, that is what they are doing. The compartment of the CIA that is supervising in a way what is happening is apparently very much unaware of some of the secret technologies I have learned about, simply by spectating and watching their absurd, inappropriate theatrics.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just felt like saying that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > In short, it seems like almost nothing will stop the CIA from illegally leaking many of their most valuable classified secrets to me, rather frequently, without my consent or permission. I am being very unusually educated, and I did not ask to be.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Another thing I realized about Richard Darkins' comment: If people in the US are familiar with me and Biden's attacks on me, then if they really think that Biden is going to succeed at continuing to bother me, given how many times he has lied and how I have been perfectly honest and the fact that honesty is a trait and the five-factor model is established science, then such people clearly do not understand or do not accept the science of the five-factor model.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I learned a lot more important and interesting things today.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My updates list of activities in the future is now:
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - publishing writing (fiction and maybe non-fiction)--no STEM or writing code at all
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - investing, based on scientific principles and not computer algorithms
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - day job (I might not reveal where I would be moving or what industry it is, given the levels of harassment and friendliness around here)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - boxing (I think it is a good idea for me to pursue a sport in my free time, not just exercise)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - continuing private science research that I will not share to fuel my other endeavors
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I *think* I will still be able to Africa, probably in a number of years rather than right away. You will note, I am avoiding things that are unfairly "access denied" activities for minority people and others who face discrimination. My plans are perfectly ethical and benevolent. I will persist in my efforts to help Africa, and also likely to help out in whatever community I am able to settle in comfortably.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On a personal and psychological note: As I noted, I recently became aware that a lot of things can be addicting. I've done a good, perfect-track-record job of stopping watching adult videos and stopping listening to modern music on purpose, cold turkey. Today, I noticed that I was feeling a little bit different and more absorbed in my own thinking, partly in a good way, but I think it is because I have been doing too many gaming activities, especially playing "Space Trader Merchant Marine," which is actually a really fun game--I beat the whole 5-level campaign part of the game, and today, I finished the first two "challenge" sections of the game...I think there are three sections of the challenge thing total. Anyway, I think I'm spending too much time on gaming, and I need to take a break. I said it was for therapeutic reasons, and I don't want to over-do it. I am also going to not play chess for a while. I didn't play today, but I was playing lots of games in the past few days before that...in the future, I will probably limit my chess activity to weekends. I'll probably still play a lot of games, but just in a few segments. I had been playing games with 10 minutes per side, and I was doing it for practice. I got tired quickly in many cases.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Thus, I have decided to stop all gaming activities for the next 3 days. In four days, I'll evaluate and see if I want to start up again, or if I'm doing fine without it. I might eventually finish the last challenge thing in STMM, but I don't want to mess up my health, particularly at a sensitive time like this for me, when I'm still being assaulted by bots sometimes, even choked at night, with the full and extremely inappropriate support of Congress.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I know what I'm going to be working on for the next few days also. I'm planning out what to do while I wait to hear back regarding my job search. I applied to about 10 jobs, and I decided that I won't apply to more jobs...I believe I'm qualified, and there shouldn't be any reason why I wouldn't hear back from the employers even just having applied to 10 jobs. If my "email interview" rate is less than 10%, something is wrong anyway.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK...I'm done with everything I was going to do tonight, really. I have a little bit more food to eat, I'm going to try to relax and feel good, hopefully I'll get a good night of sleep without bot interruptions, and I am looking forward to having a peaceful day tomorrow...maybe I'll get a phone interview request since it's Monday, we'll see! I am trying to be optimistic and good-natured.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Some sort of random thoughts: I have started to feel as though I do not like the websites youtube.com or cnn.com visually. I wonder if that is a psychological thing, since I don't use YouTube for modern music any more. I sort of don't like logging in to YouTube sometimes, just because I don't want to have to look at the web design of that website.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I have a pleasant enough day planned for tomorrow. I have decided that I will not be traveling anywhere far until I can get a job. My only work task tomorrow is going to be working on a STEM-based art, writing, and communication idea tomorrow...it should be interesting, even though I really only have an hour set aside for that work, and no time set aside for any other work. (I'll probably have to stock up on groceries again tomorrow.)
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It might be a challenge to find things to do until 2 p.m. when I wake up, since I'm not doing any gaming activities for 3 days. Maybe I should try to think of something to do if I wake up at around 10 or 11, which I probably will. I would want to do something relaxing and low-stress...hmmmm....I don't think I should get involved in doing anything on the internet, and I don't really feel like reading...Shift is a fine novel and I'm some number of chapters into it, but I don't want to keep reading it right now. No gaming, so that basically rules out everything on the computer other than typing, since I said no internet. Hmmm...maybe I could drive somewhere, but I don't want to over do the trips to the mall for walking, 1 or 2 a day seems to be enough. Also, my typical thing to do for now is sort of "act like I haven't woken up until 2" since I am trying to be nice to myself for sleeping better and having woken up early, so I have been typically not eating or showering until 2. I don't think I want to exercise in the mornings...what shall I do? I already told Rosey that I am going to try to space out my visits with her to be only about once every two weeks, which she seemed to approve of, along with my other (perfectly legal to make) disclosures about IC/military technology to her that may help her understand household life better. AFAIK, Rosey understands a lot of English quite well...I think she has some ability to learn words from reading emotional cues, I don't think she understands every single thing I say, but I sort of think she knows how to "prioritize her attention" based on tone-of-voice cues, and I bet she can kind of tell if I'm just saying some sort of "generic 'good girl! what a good puppy!'" kind of thing, and when I'm saying something more content-heavy that she should try to parse the words of. That is just my guess though.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I also do not want to try to watch any TV shows. I think what I should do is some sort of "fun, easy, relaxing, psychological health activity"...something I can just type about and not get too "new STEM heavy" with, but just some sort of simple enough prompt-based idea for thinking of something to say about myself and the interactions I've had in some way that could maybe help my psychological health, particularly in terms of decreasing stress and anxiety and "ghost feelings of upsetness" that I can't explain. That is probably what I will do tomorrow...I'll probably try to design a prompt for that tonight and write it down on my computer, and then consider doing that tomorrow early on if I'm up early.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Hopefully I can think of something sort of mildly original and different from the usual psych activities I have done in the past.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Yo, I just have to let you know right now...the truth is, I thought of the 'Calculus Man' joke before anyone else, it was my idea. Everything else? It was exchanged for that joke by the creators of Superman. I'll show myself out now."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Something occurred to me this evening...probably, Sasha Burkhoff, whose names sounds like it was selected by her parents to sound like "the perfect name for a well-respected cryptologist," and thus a possible prospect as as NSA recruit as a mentally healthy student who had attended TJHSST in Virginia, had her brain-tumor-caused murder orchestrated initially by pro-life activists. According to my analysis, there is no other reason or group who would do it. I never actually spoke with Sasha, just saw and much later thought to recall a look she gave me when I think she had been diagnosed by the brain tumor, but I didn't have a strong emotional reaction, not that I was unkind or inappropriate about it in any way, but my sense of it is, she sounds like a target of pro-life religious extremists who didn't like TJHSST in general, didn't feel it was worth to murder me--they surely faced counter-attacks, probably including lethal ones, for their actions--since I was set up to be tortured as a math slave for years, and they could only pick out one student to kill to send a message about the NSA and the types of extremist fighters whom they might have felt would work there...in theory...so my sense of it is, even if she was a religious Christian and supported pro-life positions, she might have been targeted for not being "tough enough" on pro-choicer's, like my grandmother, who was kind to me although I am a liberal atheist...she even tried to not speak to me too much when I was physically present in the house, apparently that doesn't suffice for the extremists. Anyway, it is also certainly possible that Sasha was actively pro-choice. I think my theory is right. Relatedly, probably, Heath Ledger was murdered over some sort of political cause he had supported in a movie before The Dark Knight...I don't know what that would be, but my guess is, judging from Julia Stiles's comments about Ledger and Chrissy Teigen, who emotionally abused and harassed a gay man, according to what I read, he probably supported gay rights much more than actresses like Maggie Gylenhall and Julia Stiles felt comfortable...probably more "pro-choice, that's it, I just say I'm liberal" types.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, I realized that Dr. Kudurogianis was not evil...he is also facing threats, I'm sure, and did the amount of helpful psychiatric work that he felt he would be able to do safely...I think he omitted some "emotional distress" and "employment/socialization" issues due to reasons I would not understand, perhaps related to his safety or something else. I think it is fairly clear that the psychiatric treatment that he did helped me a lot...if I become suspicious that he was actually evil once again, based on me having noticed some detail that I hadn't seen before, I will probably be sure to post my latest theory about that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Great news for people who are on my side! I spent this morning beginning and planning out further work on a "STEM-based system for recovering psychologically from harassment attacks," so that I can use some of my best secret ideas to identify cognitive issues I may be having, including with "inclinations to snap at other angrily," feeling restricted from doing certain things for no good reason, not caring enough and feeling callous about people whom I'm trying to care about and ought to care about, and other issues, and use my competitively excellent ideas to work on "fixing the damage to my mind muscles/processes" so that I can "exercise those muscles" healthily and without pain so that I can get them to be stronger and working properly, as they were in the past and should be for my health and sense of identity/self-concept. Also good news: I think that given local residents' plots to sabotage me psychologically for whatever weird reason, this announcement will demoralize them, and my announcement that it will demoralize them will likely vex them if they want to start up more strange "Wile E. Coyote schemes" to "trick and deceive and psychologically 'hex'" me to feel or perform in a way that is not my best. I.e., I think they will start to realize that their weird and freaky endeavors to mess with me are not a good investment of their time, and they'll sense the regret and unhappiness they will feel later when they see that it didn't work and was all just a frankly pathetic waste of their time, and their movement to bother me will lose enthusiasm.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, my psychology activity for this morning was a big success! I have planned some more work on it to do tomorrow, during my main hours of activity during the day, after 2 p.m.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A comment about this ordeal: I note that there were *very many* people who, in this crisis situation for me, were essentially required to do enough of their part to "give me the password" to get out of trouble. A lot of people refused, in some cases citing right-wing extremist ideology, and in other cases citing threats to them and their families. The thing about the latter situation is, basically, a lot of people "passed the burden" to my family leading to at least two relatives dying, very likely murdered by the CIA, while the other people "wanted to play it safe." I.e., by not doing their jobs, they aggressively and inappropriately passed the "lack of safety burden" from their families to mine, causing damage. Thus, the "right to be outraged and to retaliate" lies with the people who are in my family who are unethical, not with them. Basically, the JACM, Cornell, and Cambridge University in Britain, murdered my grandmother and my uncle, citing, in a sense ,a desire to be safe by virtue of having a good, sustained relationship with political terrorists and mobsters in the CIA, who illegally kill innocent people to seek to pursue their political will.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said "people in my family who are ethical," that's an inserted typo.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Oh, Publix just started discriminating against me today...how original and surprising. I CuRrEnTlY have a very thick skin about this sort of thing, and it doesn't bother me or affect me that much...I will keep shopping there for now while I still live in this dumb area. It's just, "Say goodbye to all your appealing future career possibilities, Publix employees! You don't even know what you are doing professionally, at all, and the double entendre in this sentence is intended!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Regarding my job search...I can see 9 of the jobs I applied to on the panel on the job applications website; the region I applied to is in a different time zone in the USA. I am very qualified, and I applied last Wednesday. I hope I am not being locked out by another tiresome political attack on me for no reason, one that would have pointed at me no matter what I said or did, simply because I am a mentally atheist. Anyway, I only heard back from one employer so far, and they said no to my application. Hopefully I will hear more from the other employers within the next few days...how thoroughly did Donald Trump and his lieutenants seize control of the US job market??! I hope I won't wind up just sitting here, exerting political power by typing out things on Usenet, using new STEM ideas that I have that are under development that bad guys wouldn't understand because they are not able to "crack the code" of the English language! I would really prefer to be an employed private citizen, not an ongoing law-abiding anti-US-government antagonist using cutting edge STEM capabilities to trip up US political agendas pretty much every day! Gosh, I wish I could stop feeling compelled to mess with with the USA's secretly right-wing extremist, anti-Semitic, anti-Muslim, anti-atheist government for a week or two!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The US Democratic Party has never before been forced to negotiate a full, unconditional "political surrender" to anyone, have they? Well, if I'm still here in a couple months, you'll all get to find out that feels. Imagine an America with *NO LIBERALISM WHATSOEVER.* Are you excited to live in that world? Is that what you are voting for by denying my rights, or would you like to delude yourselves and side with Biden? Indeed, I *couldn't* convince the Democrats to stop hurting or be reasonable...I can't educate them on how to be smart and rational, all I can do is destroy everything everything they ever fought for, for me because I like me and I think my life and rights matter, and then keep attacking everyone, ruining everything they've gotten and fought for over the years, until they have nothing left and realize how dumb they were.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Would you be gentler in some way if I did what you did to me to one of you? No! You are doing things to me, and I haven't committed *one* crime against any of you or any of your backers. If I had eagerly served you and gotten nothing in returned, you would have tried to Auschwitz me anyway, and would not have backed no matter what. Get ready to see where this path with leads, I'm now apparently about to be your tour guide to a whole new America that you will not recognize and not like, because it will have been politically completely re-shaped by me with cutting edge science ideas, unless I am able to not face discrimination during my job search. How much is it worth to you? Did you, "everything?" Hint: Yes, and you're right! That's what it will cost. You're already paying a large percentage of the total possible cost, do you want to increase that or decrease that?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Basically, my failure was, I thought the US leaders were self-interested and smart. I thought they would be smart enough and not crazy, and would let me have my rights and let me go. I guess they are not that smart, and insist on being pummeled some more. Either that, or I'm gong to be getting interviewed sometime this week that's for sure.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Basically, at this point, if you have been a bad guy linked to the team of people who are homicidally stalking me, if you are not done with me by the end of this week and I am not actively interviewing for jobs, you will soon be done enjoying any benefits of American liberalism, period. I have the power to do that, no one else does. Did you miss what happened to Build Back Better, abortion rights, the US military's power, Biden's approval ratings, Democratic control of Congress, and even Donald Trump being used as a threat or having a viable candidacy, due to my use of my STEM powers and the US government's failure to heed my protest on behalf of my basic Constitutional rights? In that case, I even *told you fools* *exactly* what I was doing, STEM-wise. Next time, it will be a different set of excellent capabilities, and I will not tell you a think about what I'm doing, it will devastate Democrats politically, you won't be able to guess what I'm doing with algorithms or anything else, and it will all be perfectly legitimate and in accordance with the rules. Now let me go or face the consequences!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I did a great job on my STEM research task today...things are coming along extremely well, and my work is even more fun than usual. I have more such work to do tomorrow.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Regarding the conflict: To say it again another way: The clear and repeated and persistent, un-American argument of my opponents who think I should be caged and not allowed to socialize, date, or have a job, is: "We have every right to ignore the separation of church and state and freedom of religion in the US Constitution, because we would prefer to view atheists as cattle, with worthless lives, whom the government has the right to slaughter or try to slaughter, without any respect for their rights or feelings, at any time that we choose, with no regard for any laws. We may also slaughter people like cattle that we see as 'failing to dehumanize atheists' and being too friendly with them." That is the kind of extremist you've signed up to support if you're backing Biden and his cronies. You don't want to go there, it's roughly the same thing as anti-Semitism.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A couple of developments:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 1 - It looks like the mall has changed its hours, and now it closes at 7 p.m. I don't think it used to...I wonder if the Christian church that meets in two of the store-type areas had something to do with the change, to make a statement about me?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 2 - It occurred to me this evening that some time ago, someone credible hinted to me that I was likely being considered for the position of Secretary of Defense some time ago. I might have been the youngest one if my various promotions and career achievements hadn't been sabotaged! It is probably a good idea for me to mention this at this time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A dramatic reflection on my recent learning endeavors:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Ze codes, Mr. Vite.. Ze codes! Now you see...velcome to schizophrenia, ze codes, zey make you genius!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I seem to be mostly out of jokes though. Remember when I said--rapped, rather:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "If I say things are like things and express opinion
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Each booty babe will fail to not become my minion"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ...remember when that seemed like it was going to be true?? What happened????!! All those comedic rap songs, and all I got was...uh...deniably video messaged by Zara Larsson and then blocked. Step up to the plate, yo! You only live once, and there's only one me. My arrogance, like so much else, knows no bounds...just as it is with my physics knowledge, I'm one of a kind! Now, in a space-time continuum sense, it is all women in the USA who are desperate, deep down, maybe unconsciously, to meet me, and not the other way around! Again, it's like Linkin Park always envisioned for me: "So [he's] waitin' until the upper hand is [his]....". Don't disrespect the prophecy, yo!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Would that I could calibrate my jokes to be funnier, for the perfect audience...forsooth.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (Yes, this again.)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, I do not actually know if Zara Larsson is a Nazi who supports murdering me for being an atheist. I wrote above assuming she was not.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, regarding the Richard Dawkins Tweet: Here is a really good idea; I would think that every single US citizen who is currently residing in the US, has heard of me or met me and heard what happened to me, is alive and feeling well, and never supported right-wing extremism, and didn't get a chance to get in touch when I demanded to be contacted between Sept 2020 and the present, ought to send me an email, at least wishing me well, maybe offering to see if there is anything such a person could do to help me, given that I will have basically just gotten out of a de facto American (??!) concentration camp.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The obvious question about why any such person who would read this and then not get in touch with me is, "Why not?," and it would tend to suggest that such a person, given my insistence and biography and status as a virtuous bipolar American atheist, would either feel "extremely threatened by a still-tyrannical US government," or, more likely, would be a "radicalized right-wing extremist residing in America who supports ethnic cleanings operations, against the mentally ill, against atheists, and against black people residing in Africa." Otherwise, why wouldn't such a person at least send a quick email checking it? It would seem to suggest some sort of "mass radicalization epidemic" that hit the USA, that would have hit the people who refused to contact me, and that there is indeed, as Fox News suggested when speaking of a "silent majority," that a very large number of people in the USA have apparently converted to fascism. Otherwise, I would receive at least a quick "glad you're feeling better' email for sure, from everyone who had heard of me, given that I would be like Anne Frank if she had managed to just finish escaping from a Nazi concentration camp...surely all of the people who wished her well and didn't support her being tortured and murdered by Nazis would want to send her an email congratulating her on her escape and wishing her well? There could be no other explanation, of course.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK, so I am going to go to bed soon. I am pleased that, looking at the text I've written and the lack of any coherent response to it or accusation from government officials or anyone else with authority, it is clear that it has been clear, for months now, that I am totally and 100% a victim of right-wing extremists in government and beyond...I am not a bad guy and never deserved this. So that is good.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, my science projects are going well. I am feeling a little bit mildly restless at night--it is hard to tell how much of that is due to the wake-ups from the government-linked bad guys--but mostly I feel fine each day. Just bored, ready for things to change so that I can get out of here and have a real, normal life as I and other innocent people deserve to have. I am one of the smartest and most talented people in the world now, so in spite of my set backs, I am a fairly fortunate person in terms of talent and long-term (decades-type term) outcome...I'm sure I'll be doing great in my 40's, I'll just be a little bit older and past my prime physically. Mentally, I'll surely still be the best theorem prover in the world, and that will be the source of my talent, which I'll be sure to stockpile and keep to myself.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So...I am trying to think of ways to relax at night. I looked at the YouTube videos again, and in spite of my different viewing choices, they are all completely *useless*, the recommendations totally suck and it is unpleasant even looking at the thumbnails on the main page. Now that I'm avoiding Twitter due to discrimination, I am starting to feel like groups.google.com is the only site I ever want to visit, except for maybe checking my email accounts on Yahoo and Gmail, and also occasionally glancing at cnn.com, which is also a crap website, but I ought to know a few of the top headlines that are not being covered up at any given time. So yeah. I am finding writing in my offline files to be more productive and interesting than anything there is to do online. I like typing in my offline files and walking, and eating, and I wish I could socialize and date and maybe have sex. Other than that, I'm not all that limited...I can't do work for money yet, perhaps due to government limitations, but I can still exert more political and other power than anyone else in the world...I'll have all my latest ideas set up and ready to use soon, and I'll just type what I want to type on Usenet, and see how that goes. It should have an impact, and again, it won't be unethical or against the law...I'll be sure. So my "job," coming soon if I'm not released or employed, will be writing appropriate STEM-backed posts, in captivity, on the internet to continue to exert my political will on the world. I should be allowed to socialize and friends--I'm a perfectly nice and quite normal person, I follow the rules, don't do anything wrong, just file complaints about the epidemic of weirdos bothering me and never start fights, always do the right thing, never do any weird or creepy/strange things to other people like try to "scare them" or follow them around or harass them, always behave appropriately and like I should. Anyway, I'll see where this ends pretty soon I'm sure...the bad guys, I don't think, can take many more losses...I mean they can, but they really wouldn't look like they are even employed if they keep pushing with this, I don't get how such high-power leaders of the US, in such a competitive field, can be so completely stupid, irrational, nakedly and publicly pro-extremism and pro-terrorism, and able to still maintain approval ratings of about 30%. I admit, I'm quite stunned by that capability...how can such incompetent figure out a way to keep their jobs without ever doing them, how on earth do they do that? I'm not jealous and don't want to copy that, but the example is stunning and interesting in its own right, like Caligula's success as a Roman leader.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Once again, I am thinking some more about Richard Dawkins' Tweet. Liar drops R; maybe that means, Joe Biden drops Regency Mall, without the monolith, i.e., I will get hired based on the region I correctly applied to. If so, great! That will be excellent. My usual "Donkey Kong dance," not that I think mentally ill people should be considered apes, but I'm thinking of the "aggressive impactful stomping" of sorts, before big event relevant to me that might be sabotaged that may require a "vocally aggressive send-off to the immediate predecessor time" just before the full result is in, to pre-attack in case I've been "foiled again by a pinball-tilt wizard with no ethics or sense of 'gosh, that was too much, enough is enough,'" is basically contained above in some of the writing. I basically always do that, in this situation where I post a lot in public, right before I think that something big and important I'm working towards is about to possibly be sabotaged into not working right again, based on an initial "bad sign," which just be an incidental thing and nothing to worry about over all.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I'm thinking maybe I will get a job. I hope so. I'm going to turn the computer off pretty soon and get more fully ready to fall asleep.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, I am a little bit worried about: the guy with the bald head who used to also walk on Quioccasin Road who I think was mentally ill, Kristen, who sometimes walked on Quioccasin Road and seemed to have disappeared recently, and the guy that I saw who was black who seemed like he was mentally ill on Quioccasin, and the white guy who looked like he liked to wear military camouflage type of clothing and a hat whom I would see on Quioccasin road...there was also the black guy that I called "nodding head man" who used to bother me, he might have been mentally ill, and maybe I shouldn't blame him for having bothered me by nodding his fast when I was very much more sensitive and messed up due, I think, to trauma-related mental illness. Is anyone going to help them if they are still in trouble and not where they want to be in life yet? They looked like they were totally shunned by the local community and very under-supported, if they did indeed have mental health problems...probably they weren't even all identifying as atheists. I hope that my "monolith" will be their "monolith," too, i.e., that they will be able to get out of isolation, if they're in isolation in the Tuckahoe area and not already out of isolation.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A couple more comments:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Yeah I trained my "inner word-fighter persona" in melee combat with Ras al CVS. I stole the power to be extremely rude, with or without a reason of any sort.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - This morning, I noticed that my neck and shoulders felt a little weird and sort of sore, like it would feel comfortable to rest my head by tilting it to the right, like I was Stephen Hawking who was paralyzed and had his head looking like it was at an angle in his wheelchair, at least that was my perception...maybe it was not actually at much of an angle, checking the photos on Google briefly. It sounds like a nasty joke about me and atheists and highly competent STEM people, and I received a credible psych hint about the government-linked gesture doing this, suggesting that it is not a total surprise, perhaps, and a psych professional somewhere knew that a gesture of this nature would be done at some point, and maybe the perpetrator's psychological state and behavior are not necessarily hard to explain or predict, to an extent, at all. Yes, there is probably something psychological to be learned from my own initial explorations into basic amateur psychology...what did I reach for first, how is my "first-choice" lens to reach for characterized? Whatever. I'm mainly pivoting back to "easy psych ideas," just because my psych "research," amateur and not valuable/competitive or not, is mainly just to help me improve my own health for now, not to win any "innovative psychology research contests" or anything along those lines. I'm more interested in competing, vaguely speaking, at "applied math that I can use to get ahead at almost anything performance-related," in a variety of different contexts.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Remember: It is the lives of Nazis and other intolerant right-wing extremists that are worthless, not the lives of the people that they target and despise.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > youtube.com/watch?v=C9SiRNibD14&embeds_euri=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2F&source_ve_path=MjM4NTE&feature=emb_title
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yes, this video is sad. Science is a good thing--the means to power, health, safety, technological progress, and often prosperity.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, it is concerning that this woman from Africa is trying to like Newton's scientific achievements with colonization. There is no evidence that science is linked to discrimination or exploitation of minority groups or people outside of the US.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A concern is that many people would argue that people who want to support colonizing or otherwise support exploiting Africa ought to be killed, i.e., if it is not illegal in your country to kill someone who wants to support fascism or slavery-like activities, then it would not be a bad idea to kill that person, like killing a Confederate or Nazi soldier in battle; the lives of confirmed fascists are worthless, and within the constraints of US law in America, ought to be either imprisoned, killed, or otherwise removed from relevance and ideally prosperity, as soon as possible. That goes for anyone who wants to eliminate some or all people from a particular legitimate background as though they had no rights, whether the background is ethnic, religious, or something else not related to "being an evil predatory fascist."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I am hoping that she does not mean that she thinks that pro-science people should be killed. Sadly, if she adopted such a position and pushed for it, she would put herself into a very bad category. I am speaking about this because I believe that people in Africa, who may have been denied some Western educational benefits, deserve more of a chance to turn around mistaken behavior and not support hurting pro-science people, including science-interested students in school who might not thrive without education...although that is different from wanting "pro-science people killed," and she didn't say that she wanted that, I am just worried about the claimed connection between colonialism and science.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My point is that people who support murder and fascism become, after a certain possible grace period of controversial length, people with worthless lives. Most people who fought for Naziism in WW2 ought not be given a chance to "tell everyone they're sorry and repent," that's good enough. There are some fascists from different parts of history that should not be allowed out of jail for 500 years. I still oppose the death penalty avidly, but any person who converts to fascism, while not losing his or her rights as a possibly accused criminal person or not, loses the "desirability of their existence," although it might be illegal to kill them without a trial.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So my point is, do not ever join forces with fascists, no matter what opinions you may have about people from backgrounds other than your own--you may champion your beliefs and backgrounds, but never support the denial of rights or the denial of desirability of other people being alive, unless such people are fascists, i.e., people who themselves deny the desirability of being alive to others over a mere beliefs-based disagreement that does involve calling for the deaths of innocent, "maybe just wrong" people, as opposed to true fascists.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said, "that's not good enough."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Someone outside signaled me to "see Bill Gates," so I did.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > What is he saying? "PW aim [is getting close with] the world" ? What, now for the first time? Is this some sort of reverse psychology trick?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Why didn't Microsoft offer to hire me, since it understood my talent all along?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My aim is to have my own life, withhold my STEM talents as punishment for the "slavery and extraction" initiative that political terrorists backed, presumably because they didn't want me to get big at DOD because criminals in STEM business, like Zuckerberg and possibly also Gates--I don't know--might fear my rules-based leadership and top-notch talent at STEM. I also want to help Africa. Is there some sort of claim that I have been inconsistent in anything I said?? Is it claimed that my chemistry disclosure, related to BQP = P and disease cures, somehow does *not* cure cancer?? Please, check with an expert who still trusts you, if you can find one! I am definitely no longer "crank" by any measure, and I never was one, just somewhat ignorant about classical mechanics and other areas of physics--I had been quite behind on studying, now I am not--I don't have a deep understanding of relativity, general or special, but I get the very basics of QM, and I understand classical mechanics well.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Bill Gates must not smear me, or risk being seen as "just another big-money-man cheater who fought his way to the top, became 'a king of having money,' and added no value to the world," just as the excellent researcher and publisher CS Christos Papadimitriou seems to have predicted, sort of.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I *will* help Africa if I can make the money. Why wouldn't I? Is it claimed that I cannot, that I don't have the will to spend money on such things? Does Gates actually believe that a condition for my freedom, as a brilliant, totally innocent atheist who is much better at math, CS, and engineering than he is, even as a top-ranked business leader, is that I must "serve the world" with my STEM talents, publishing free "naked photos of all the things that make me powerful," so that he can make money from them and not I? I've given more than enough free STEM gifts to the world, it is time for me to be *compensated* for my work, and also, well past time for me to be liberated--unlike Gates, I've never been credibly accused of committing a serious crime.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe Gates is questioning why I have lost interest in STEM. Oh, is he pretending that he doesn't know a certain fact about computers, or does he actually not know?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, if Gates is not a fascist or homicidal criminal at least, I *demand* his full support for my release. He should have offered to buy my IP, but not being a likely candidate for being ethical, he probably would never do that. I have nothing to fear from a "lacking Bill Gates like" as long as I do not work as a STEM worker in the STEM industry; his "like" is irrelevant in my new chosen field.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A question about the local community:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Are most citizens in the Tuckahoe area *actually* claiming that they "don't really have free speech rights or the right to peaceably assemble near me," or is that another fake-out attempt? If they believe that, do they accept that, and is their defense against further curtailments against their rights, due to their crimes, that "no one has the capability to do anything to us, so we're just going to keep doing our way?" I think that attitude will not get a good outcome; no one wants to tell you how certain techniques for dealing with "right-wing bad guy daredevils" are sometimes used to fight back.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Whatever that other post says on my thread, I am not reading it.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, the Little League tragedy of today is, Publix once again was deliberately out of YoCrunch (they claimed credit for it yesterday). Clearly, there is only one question about this situation: Will I, or will I not, get into volunteer "Retail Rap" under the rapper name, "Cashier Fatherf---er For Fun," and how many cashier careers will I mercilessly ruin with the awesome power of the pen?? IS there a limit to how much damage I can enjoy myself while sustaining it and waiting for whatever to happen? Who knew hurting bad-guy people's lives could be so fun???
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yo, I gotta start right there, I can't just leave that hanging, yo....
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > UNTITLED RAP
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > by Cashier Fatherf---er For Fun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yo, my name is Manheim, they think they're Julia Right
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A Stiles motherpredecessor, ring it up as a fight, yo...
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I can't delete losers as fast as I shop, but
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I would compete to get losers' heads on a justice chopping block
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > You know, I am an artist--my words are OK--because, I
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Fight relentlessly to just prove I'm still not gay, because I
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Am gay deep down, unless it's a statement to show, that
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm not intimidated by deletions of Yo-
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Crunch, um, you knew that was coming 'cause I rap about me
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I channel adrenaline and I charge a fee, you see
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The metaphorical gun flash but you think there's no gun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > And yeah, it's just a metaphor, I smoked you for fun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > [begin snare]
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm not Obama--I just snort Confederates when stuck on an island
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > If I write aggressive raps and die will they scream, "Oh, why, man??!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Does anyone miss anyone without a new rap atmosphere?--no.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I thought I proved to them my strength is from being non-sex-queer, though.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quirky adrenaline, you'll never trace it down, guys
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I spurt technologies, and you lose blood like dead flies
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > You sign up for death and more death and I'm totally blameless
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I thought He'd cancel you, but everyone's shameless.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > [guitar solo]
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I need an outro that returns to the central
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Theme of my rap which is that you are all no-go's
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I use that word and not the p-slur--I'm perfect
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Still bag the groceries miss, your life is now worthless.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > That's my rap song! What do you think? I feel comfortable asserting that viciously insulting intransigent law breaker cashiers is not harassment or stalking, as long as I don't name names or say anything directly in public. I have a right to make political speech, in the form of art, whether your like it or not. A lot of people are saying that they hate me for stupid reasons, why not get more insulting, see if they like it more? Maybe some professional rapper will come out and say how much they hate me too, I'll be sure to quiver. Also, I'm still under duress, as anyone can see! The hate-fueled nightmare is supposed to never end according to them, I don't have to persuade you, if you don't know how to think, it's your graves, Confederacy punks! Fascists always lose! Don't delude yourselves about exactly what you are! Note, retail work is fine, if you do it WITHOUT trying to intimidate, harass, gaslight, or discriminate against people. Let's see how juiced up Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren will get this time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > That was fun. Now on to other things.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yeah that's right I was actually mean, once.. What!!!!!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > No I am not going to publish any new STEM ideas to help the military or other goons. I'm immune to all manipulative tricks, I'm done outputting STEM, forever, you're on your own, losers.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm starting to worry that Biden shut down my job search in another state, too. The job was one I was extremely qualified for, and I still haven't heard anything positive from any of the jobs I applied to.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So...do all geographic regions in the USA support the idea that Biden is completely control of law-abiding, intelligent religious minorities' members being able to get a job, literally anywhere? Can Biden shut down good career moves for any atheist in the USA? I suspect that the answer is yes, and no one will talk about it...I hope something really nasty and permanent happens to the people who are making sleazy deals of this nature, in clear support of anti-atheist fascism.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway...I don't know what to do next, I have fought and worked as hard as almost anyone ever could, but just as Einstein would have trouble getting out of a concentration camp if he had stayed in Germany for too long, all my talents and work and digging deep, and really exerting myself to try to look out for myself and exercise my legal rights and get a good job have thwarted by vastly populated legions, sadly, of American right-wing extremists. They are not being challenged enough, they have largely taken over the economy of the country, and contrary to my initial belief, it looks like they do not merely control STEM and retail.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > FYI, I am not saying it is a Jewish conspiracy, in case someone thinks that I sound like some sort of bad guy who is claiming that "Jews are trying to control everything." It is not Jewish people, it is American political crooks. WHEN will they cut this out? It has been almost 12 years, I tried asking nicely and appealing to reason and the evidence and my innocence, I tried demonstrations of my STEM talent and was just smeared (e.g., with the Hodge Conjecture, my logic result, the twin prime conjecture, etc.), I finally resorted to aggressively attacking the fascist leaders who are perpetrating this...what am I supposed to do? What is any person in my position, being innocent and just mentally ill and an atheist, supposed to do to get away from extra-judicial assaults and "containment efforts" made against by government-employed fascists?? Someone is supposed to fix this! I could warn of the consequences--some of them have already been faced--but I am growing tired of that. Don't try to convert the USA to a racist dictatorship, that is not good for anyone. Leave me alone and let me work!!! Fascists deserve death, not liberals!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just realized something: The government still thinks it's going to use "stress" and "psychological manipulation" to manipulate my mood and feelings, and put me in great distress--probably with a few more "false hope" things, then "choking incidents," then "weird and confusing signals that seem to be about something important...but what are they really saying?", and try to manipulate me into changing my mind into publishing more STEM.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > In the past, I definitely changed my mind about publishing differential equations--I thought it would help, and it probably did...it probably ended the US's ability to be a navy and air force superpower, basically permanently, unless more help would be provided by me.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > I do not share things at random. I try to do what is in my interests, whether I'm stressed out and desperate (I probably won't be in the near future at all) or not. I have done a really good job on working on being able to relax. I AM NOT GOING TO PUBLISH ANY MORE STEM. I made sure, after I changed my mind on diff eq publication, to also change my mind and "declare law-abiding war on the US Department of Defense," and I did that, and I won...I tossed them a breakable code using BPP = P, and they can use it, but it doesn't matter--all their secret things were lost to their adversaries via flight surveillance and cryptology during the no-codes phase.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > I won the war on DOD, they just want to deny it, and now shower THEMSELVES with false hope and optimism, thinking that they are "such great Christian guys, of COURSE they'll get it back, the US NEVER loses like this," precisely because the US has never been this morally wrong-headed or right-wing and extremist before; the US declared war on terrorism in 2001, and thus itself in the near future--today.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > I WILL NEVER PUBLISH MORE STEM TO HELP THE GOVERNMENT FOR ANY OTHER REASON. It is over, I am keeping it to myself to fuel other endeavors, I am *never* going to try to help *anyone*, other than my own children, with STEM sharing or explanation efforts, EVER AGAIN.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe that will clarify some things.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > My day today was fairly pleasant. I had to go to Food Lion to get YoCrunch because Publix still wouldn't stock it...whatever.. I will probably write more "rather absurd rap songs" to exercise my sense of humor, since I can't even talk right now, but I'll probably be more light-hearted and less mean in the future.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Somewhat disappointingly, my schedule for my day tomorrow is basically exactly the same as my schedule for today. I worked for more than an hour on my math research task today, which was great and yielded some good ideas. I am still continuing the same research tomorrow, and I might do it for at most 2 more days before I move on. I am only doing real work for 1-2 hours a day right now, and I'm still on my gaming break. I might stay on that, unless I get more headaches soon.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > I am starting to think that the end of this will have nothing to do with getting the job I was trying to get from the job search. Do I have to wait for the government to relent? What about waiting for the wildly nutty local citizens to relent? I don't see what they are thinking or afraid of or doing, why are they *all* *still* siding with fascist ideologies, do they think they will get some sort of warmth and protection from that? That is not a good move, side with the truth, good values, patriotism, the US Constitution, and me, not code-talking terrorist linked insider threat bad guys who "have a job in the government." I had a job in the government, let me tell you, that helps you 0% with law enforcement, whether you mention it or not, if you get arrested or TDO'd (I have never been arrested, but I have been TDO'd, twice by police, sometimes even improperly, shortly after quitting jobs as an NSA contractor...it changes nothing, which is how it is supposed to work). I.e., even if you think you have power from a government position and try to abuse it, the police will just ignore that. It's just a job, it's not a magical "becoming a king or queen" ceremony, you really shouldn't see government employees as "larger than life," they're mostly very inefficient and ineffective at getting things done at the office.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > So anyway...I am trying to be calm, since it's getting late. I am trying to relax and not vent any more angry feelings or "creative interpretations for debate/persuasion/etc." about this nonsense. I wonder what it will take for me to be spoken to again? I don't know. I might take a break from all work pretty soon, but then I wouldn't know what to do with all my time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Yeah, I wonder what the end of this will look like. Which will happen first? Will local residents come to their senses and stop backing fascists and code-talking liars? Will I get a job? Will someone from another state or another country write to me? Will the DOD write to me to apologize for their huge mistake/crime? Will the news run a story forcing a bad US political leader to resign, decreasing interest in this "project?" I don't know, but I've waited for over a decade for justice and access to my Constitutional rights!! What a farce, I don't know for sure what exactly these people are thinking.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I'm going to try to have a pleasant night..
> > > > > > > > > > > > So, now that night-time is here, I note I would probably feel more relaxed if I typed something relaxing. Who knows why. I should be high-energy and full of comments and ideas and even a little bit of aggression during the day--I just remembered that I said I was going to stop being aggressive, but it is sometimes hard to remember all the different changes I wanted to make to improve my psych health, it's not that important that I stick to that, it is just important that I never publish STEM again.
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I think the "monolith" is: Regency Mall drops Regency, i.e., when the local mall loses its administrative authority given to it on behalf of a monarch. What authority is that? What exactly can they do? I think Dawkins' subsequent comment, which came out to "clatter lordie," suggests that the Christian church there got investigated for extremism after my comment...I did see a little bit of evidence of that, some man inside one of their areas made a sort-of Nazi salute gesture at me, I mainly just ignored that, that sort of thing is pretty common around here.
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe I should disclose more strange mall activity?....they keep sending groups of young men with one overweight chesty woman by to say things, the group today yelled "penis" when I looked at them, and the woman made eye contact with me and said something like "bye bye Kyle," which is the first name of a male patient at Dominion Hospital that I went to see Dr. Steg in 2001. Maybe it helps to repeat these things, I don't know. I heard some other man say "bye Felicia" loudly a while ago, a number of days ago, at the mall. I heard a woman who looked pretty and might have been Hispanic talking on the phone, near the "escape rooms" thing with her group of friends, and I heard her say, "I have a reservation" over the phone, perhaps she was from out of town.
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > Last time with the overweight chesty woman, the code was something like "a cost" then "most sag" and then the code had like "two sniffles" after that, I don't know what they were trying to say. Whatever, I don't get the point or message of what they're trying to do, it sounds unfriendly. I saw a group of teenagers coming by, and they made some sort of like aggressive gesture while looking at me, like, "WHAT?!", and I didn't pay that much attention to them.
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > There was a large group of people singing in the Christian church area a few days ago. Today, a black man in a Harvard sweatshirt came out of the bottom of the elevator, holding a staff or stick or whatever. Today, I saw a security guy on one of those electronic rolling segue thing, making some sort of gesture. I saw a guy like that working for security before; he did that when I first started walking there, then the next a different security guy started quickly shaking his head at me, then I complained, then there were two security workers sitting at a desk, and one of them sort of "put their hands up," a lot like one of the female workers at Food Lion did one time. I don't know the gang codes at all, I'm just posting to maybe help "drop the regency of Regency Mall," maybe it will work!
> > > > > > > > > > > Actually, no, DOS, "roboticdeepthroatconditioning.mil" is not a good idea for a web-based app for your upcoming startup. Get a little more creative, there actually are some fascists out there who are even better at thinking and science than you.
> > > > > > > > > > Rap About Walking In the RVA Area, Etc.
> > > > > > > > > > by Broom Philip
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > I've got to find a place to walk every day
> > > > > > > > > > The FBI is like shut down, so criminals may
> > > > > > > > > > Do what they want to do whenever they want
> > > > > > > > > > Follow me through shopping malls, grocery stores, and Deep Run Park
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > So I am writing a rap to kill some time, you know
> > > > > > > > > > I see the anarchists have killed fighting crime, and so
> > > > > > > > > > My free time's spent on research food and health
> > > > > > > > > > While the world is acting like it's favored by stealth
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > They think the secret spies stalk their enemies better
> > > > > > > > > > If they can't see it, they think, it makes women wetter
> > > > > > > > > > The movie-like atmosphere of intriguing spy pirates
> > > > > > > > > > Is, they think, the beauty of all violence in silence
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > The rap is weak today 'cause it's just a drill
> > > > > > > > > > You'd rather have just me and not the FBI chill, but
> > > > > > > > > > Indeed you wanted Sin City but got Gotham instead
> > > > > > > > > > You think you're safest when your eyes are closed in bed
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > My self-expression requires no apology, now
> > > > > > > > > > They changed god to mysteriousness in their brand new theology, now
> > > > > > > > > > The Christian church no longer has its true savior
> > > > > > > > > > And, they think forgiveness green lights every behavior..
> > > > > > > > > Here is my latest prediction of how it will end: On March 14 or so, 18 days after Dawkins' Tweet, Biden has predicted in public in code that Vladimir Putin will be killed by a US-linked drone strike, and then Biden's approval ratings will go up and he'll look more likely to win the 2024 election. The truth is, though, the capabilities to be dominant, air-force-wise, over Russia have been removed for the US; they cannot possibly have the power to do that sort of assassination any more--no country has that kind of power any more, at least not over the top developed nations with the GDP to support "the standard air force." Perhaps the bad guys will finally drop me and admit assaulting me wasn't worth it, even taking morality out of the equation. *Hopefully* they will regain a sliver of their sanity.
> > > > > > > > Update regarding my job search: I think I did apply to the right region--a place that is not against, e.g., LGBTQ people--and I think that there are firms that would like to reach out to me. My guess is, some political group essentially made "huge threats" against the firms that seemed likely to communicate with me, and there is a "brief pause for a battle," that the employers will win. So far, none of the 10 or so firms I applied to have written back except one...I bet they will, and it will just take a while, due to political pressure, which one of the firms even says it does not value above equal opportunity, even in cases of stalking.
> > > > > > > A comment on an excerpt from the article linked to on Richard Dawkins' Twitter:
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > https://www.spectator.co.uk/article/who-really-discovered-dnas-structure/
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > "This is a story replete with competition, friction, misunderstanding and some sexism, but it lacks anything truly unethical, let alone criminal. Four men and one woman, none of whom was perfect ... "
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > What? "...it lacks anything truly unethical..." ??! How exactly can one claim that refusing to cite someone else's research contribution, particularly when there was a huge breakthrough with big incentivized possibilities on the table, not being cited is not unethical?? I believe they were truly paying attention, and got press and thus an opportunity to correct themselves...it is very unethical to fail to cite research contributions, unless it is an accident and, once this is pointed out, a full and profuse apology is made by the non-citers. Researchers, including me, very often do not get paid anything beyond, in the cases of Ph.D. professors, "acceptable satisfaction of publishing requirements" to keep their jobs--I don't know if there are raise calculations involved--and so it is very important to cite research and things that contribute to research whenever a publication is done. I try to do so even informally when, in the past, I published things on the internet.
> > > > > > I also watched the first three minutes of this:
> > > > > >
> > > > > > https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E3bLSePqCvc&feature=youtu.be
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Interestingly, I didn't know about natural selection before I was in middle school myself...it is interesting to think about different education curriculums in different countries. I think I got better at understanding it in 9th grade. Also, I was very interested in genetic algorithms in college...before I figured out how to actually solve the discrete logarithm problem, one of my early attempts was based on genetic algorithms.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > One way to view the idea of evolution speed--since you might wonder, with respect to what metric or dimension are you defining speed, or change with time?--is to think about some way to formalize the idea of "changes to the 'fitness function'" in a collection of evolving entities over generations.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > You could argue that breeding is likely to bring about "very large changes to the minimum Hamming distance between possible binary Turing machine indexes that could be used to represent each fitness function." I don't actually know that much about biological evolution--is it just the genetic code that evolves and mutates, or is there more to it than that??--but I think my idea is good.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Just so you know, I count that as "discussion of STEM ideas," not publication of anything truly new or revolutionary. I.e., I am talking about something I know in STEM, not trying to "serve anyone" with more valuable research disclosures.
> > > > > An amusing thing I just realized: It is almost certainly true that Abigail Spanberger has actually *never* worked for the CIA, and made up the whole claim to bolster career as a political leader. It sounds like she did not get a job there...I realized that there is something that she would definitely know if she had successfully obtained a TS/SCI clearance at that particular agency. It's actually quite funny.
> > > > I just realized that Stephen Cook and probably Kaveh Ghasemloo are probably good guys, and that Neil Immerman, although he proved P = NP in the 1980's, and Michael Sipser are likely bad guys who supported trafficking me. Timothy Chow is of course also bad. It would also appear that Sara More, the professor who gave a talk to the math department introducing me to the discrete logarithm problem, was also actually a bad guy all along, although that talk did influence me in a good way and launch my research career.. All of the UMW professors, including math and CS professors, and all of the UVA professors that I briefly saw at an engineering building there when I took the GREs, which might have had my score modified by the bot, were all evil and supportive of the bad-guy government efforts to surveil and enslave and torture me, too. Additionally, all of the psych and other doctors I saw outside of Dr. Steg were evil, before I saw Dr. K, including Welton and others...basically, I won't say how I know but it is not illegal for me to say it, all of them would have *tried* to get in touch with me if they hadn't supported trafficking and torturing me, like the child predators that they all always were, and I would have found out about the effort...I am now at a point where I can *prove* that they were bad guys felons who were against me, but I refuse to say how i know.
> > > >
> > > > So that is my update for now.
> > > Quote of the evening:
> > >
> > > "News flash, Jennifer Polacks (that's all of you): None of you are 'cute and funny' like you think, all of you are pathetic pedophiles, who should be locked away or shot in the head and thrown in a ditch, whichever you make easier and more convenient for normal people who care about normal things and aren't idiotic freaks that no one has ever liked."
> > A few comments:
> >
> > - People who are fascists do have worthless lives, but they should not try to commit suicide. Instead, they should repent, be sorry, talk about what they did, try to change themselves, and try to get themselves sent to jail, so that they can pay whatever debt they have to society, whether that's life in prison or less than that.
> > - Thinking about it, I do know that my father really worked for DOJ...I don't know that he actually definitely ever worked for OPR, but when I was a kid, I went to his office one time, so I know he really worked there. At the same time, I am skeptical that my mother actually got a master's degree in mathematics and economics, and worked for Booz Allen Hamilton as a defense contractor before I was born. I do not know that my mother is ever honest about anything, at this point. She had a friend, named Jacqui, whom my sister and I called "Aunt Jacqui," whom my mother claimed worked for the CIA. My mother and I and maybe my sister too visited "Aunt Jacqui's" apartment in Northern VA one time, but I'm now not sure that she actually worked for the CIA. There are a lot of things that my parents said when I was young that may not have been true...I think my family history, on my Dad's side is true, but I don't know too much about my mom's family, and many of them seem to be not possessing great values. I don't know that my Uncle Skip was in the military and electrocuted in some sort of "water and electricity related accident," and I can't be sure that my mother's father was really an electrician whom my mother "taught herself basically from his textbook which she called the 'cook book' when she was a child." My mother claims to run a tax preparation business and take many "tax courses" without having a CPA; she did always talk on the phone a lot, and I know that she claimed to have that "tax preparation business" as early as when I was 3. I don't know if any of that was true.
> I said "taught herself basic high school algebra from ..." .

On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 8:22:06 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 8:07:17 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 8:04:54 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:52:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:43:16 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:25:33 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 4:44:00 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 4:35:29 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 2:06:33 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 12:18:11 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 11:48:48 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:00:40 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 10:15:18 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 9:40:36 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 9:07:21 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 8:11:18 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 7:48:21 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 7:38:38 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 4:14:31 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 3:33:40 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:59:36 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:56:42 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 10:50:01 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 12:30:35 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 12:03:27 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 11:33:28 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 10:40:48 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 9:50:02 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 9:45:56 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 7:29:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 6:38:09 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 5:07:15 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:41:22 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:40:14 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:31:28 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:24:38 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 2:29:02 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 2:25:34 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 1:40:22 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 12:14:30 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 12:05:02 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 11:52:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 10:34:20 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:54:20 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:12:54 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:08:43 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 7:03:13 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 7:00:27 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 2:39:55 PM UTC-5, B.H. wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 12:44:04 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, February 25, 2023 at 11:15:19 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ...the bot shot down my post again, but I thought to copy it before I posted it, so I can still paste it below:
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just had a totally great idea just now! I was reflecting on the fact that I recently devise two very excellent STEM-based ideas for figuring out how to predict the stock market. I also have devised some great STEM-based ideas for how to communicate well, especially in writing...that project of devising more such ideas is ongoing.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Then, it occurred to me, based on some of my notes about my recent chess games: I could get into using STEM ideas to analyze and especially improve my performance at chess and running.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I decided to go back to Deep Run Park to start doing at least a little bit of running, now without music, starting tomorrow.. I will still walk at the mall, because I don't find walking at DRP to be relaxing given all the weird people who show up there. Anyway, that is my new plan for what to do with my time now...I have been feeling fine, did well today, and felt less restricted and more "able to not have to be 'calming down' at night to feel OK," than I had felt in the past. The bot choking affected me only minimally, my mood was still much better than it had been in the 2 weeks preceding.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, that is my update for now. I feel a little unhappy that I am probably going to be known only as a writer, and not a science publisher, but think that is the right decision for me. I will get credit for writing, and I might branch into "persuasive/quasi-political non-fiction," as opposed to "here-you-go-America-free-service" non-fiction, as I was sort of thinking of doing at first. I really doubt I will change my mind, the decision, which seems quite right, is still just slowly sinking in....I am very likely to be a writer, full-time, and pour my STEM ideas into that, not any "sharing of secret family-enabling math ideas."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I will get more used to the idea and enthusiastic about it after it has been sinking in for a few days or weeks.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > After reviewing my job applications again, I am ready to say that I'm cautiously optimistic that I will get a job. I am not sure, but I am eagerly anticipating hearing back from one or more of the employers that I applied to in this next upcoming week.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Today, I'm going to do my usual things--not really start in until 2, although it's kind of boring to just do nothing for so many hours when I keep waking up at around 10 or so...I woke up in the middle of the night last night with a very fast heart rate, but it settled down and was fine, it's probably related to past bot conditioning attempts, and my cardio is good enough that I will be fine I'm sure.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm going to do my run, and start investigating "performance enhancement science" ideas...I'm pretty sure I will be the most competitive person in the world at that, as well as at, in general, physics, computer science, mathematics, statistics, communication, and writing. Hopefully I will get my chess game and exercise abilities in top-notch shape, too!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I believe I get it...I understand something...anyway, I decided to skip running for today after all, and focus on other "research-related activities."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I will do great, and my plans at this point haven't really changed.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A quick comment about a new understanding I have of my CIA opponents: They think that their attention to detail, thoroughness in planning, and very aggressive engineering efforts will, once demonstrated, somehow "break my morale" because (they think) "I am immoral" because "I am mentally ill and not Christian," and I do not acknowledge them as being above me in any way morally--for sure, given how they act. Basically, they have been continually baffled by how their aggressive demonstrations have led to me absorbing and reverse engineering a lot of their most valued secret technologies, including ones that I find knowledge of to be extremely useful to me and that I do not wish to repeat, even though I could since it is not my disclosure of classified information (is it classified?) that is being readily passed to unauthorized persons, that is what they are doing. The compartment of the CIA that is supervising in a way what is happening is apparently very much unaware of some of the secret technologies I have learned about, simply by spectating and watching their absurd, inappropriate theatrics.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just felt like saying that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > In short, it seems like almost nothing will stop the CIA from illegally leaking many of their most valuable classified secrets to me, rather frequently, without my consent or permission. I am being very unusually educated, and I did not ask to be.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Another thing I realized about Richard Darkins' comment: If people in the US are familiar with me and Biden's attacks on me, then if they really think that Biden is going to succeed at continuing to bother me, given how many times he has lied and how I have been perfectly honest and the fact that honesty is a trait and the five-factor model is established science, then such people clearly do not understand or do not accept the science of the five-factor model.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I learned a lot more important and interesting things today.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My updates list of activities in the future is now:
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - publishing writing (fiction and maybe non-fiction)--no STEM or writing code at all
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - investing, based on scientific principles and not computer algorithms
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - day job (I might not reveal where I would be moving or what industry it is, given the levels of harassment and friendliness around here)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - boxing (I think it is a good idea for me to pursue a sport in my free time, not just exercise)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - continuing private science research that I will not share to fuel my other endeavors
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I *think* I will still be able to Africa, probably in a number of years rather than right away. You will note, I am avoiding things that are unfairly "access denied" activities for minority people and others who face discrimination. My plans are perfectly ethical and benevolent. I will persist in my efforts to help Africa, and also likely to help out in whatever community I am able to settle in comfortably.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On a personal and psychological note: As I noted, I recently became aware that a lot of things can be addicting. I've done a good, perfect-track-record job of stopping watching adult videos and stopping listening to modern music on purpose, cold turkey. Today, I noticed that I was feeling a little bit different and more absorbed in my own thinking, partly in a good way, but I think it is because I have been doing too many gaming activities, especially playing "Space Trader Merchant Marine," which is actually a really fun game--I beat the whole 5-level campaign part of the game, and today, I finished the first two "challenge" sections of the game...I think there are three sections of the challenge thing total. Anyway, I think I'm spending too much time on gaming, and I need to take a break. I said it was for therapeutic reasons, and I don't want to over-do it. I am also going to not play chess for a while. I didn't play today, but I was playing lots of games in the past few days before that...in the future, I will probably limit my chess activity to weekends. I'll probably still play a lot of games, but just in a few segments. I had been playing games with 10 minutes per side, and I was doing it for practice. I got tired quickly in many cases.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Thus, I have decided to stop all gaming activities for the next 3 days. In four days, I'll evaluate and see if I want to start up again, or if I'm doing fine without it. I might eventually finish the last challenge thing in STMM, but I don't want to mess up my health, particularly at a sensitive time like this for me, when I'm still being assaulted by bots sometimes, even choked at night, with the full and extremely inappropriate support of Congress.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I know what I'm going to be working on for the next few days also. I'm planning out what to do while I wait to hear back regarding my job search. I applied to about 10 jobs, and I decided that I won't apply to more jobs...I believe I'm qualified, and there shouldn't be any reason why I wouldn't hear back from the employers even just having applied to 10 jobs. If my "email interview" rate is less than 10%, something is wrong anyway.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK...I'm done with everything I was going to do tonight, really. I have a little bit more food to eat, I'm going to try to relax and feel good, hopefully I'll get a good night of sleep without bot interruptions, and I am looking forward to having a peaceful day tomorrow...maybe I'll get a phone interview request since it's Monday, we'll see! I am trying to be optimistic and good-natured.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Some sort of random thoughts: I have started to feel as though I do not like the websites youtube.com or cnn.com visually. I wonder if that is a psychological thing, since I don't use YouTube for modern music any more. I sort of don't like logging in to YouTube sometimes, just because I don't want to have to look at the web design of that website.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I have a pleasant enough day planned for tomorrow. I have decided that I will not be traveling anywhere far until I can get a job. My only work task tomorrow is going to be working on a STEM-based art, writing, and communication idea tomorrow...it should be interesting, even though I really only have an hour set aside for that work, and no time set aside for any other work. (I'll probably have to stock up on groceries again tomorrow.)
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It might be a challenge to find things to do until 2 p.m. when I wake up, since I'm not doing any gaming activities for 3 days. Maybe I should try to think of something to do if I wake up at around 10 or 11, which I probably will. I would want to do something relaxing and low-stress...hmmmm...I don't think I should get involved in doing anything on the internet, and I don't really feel like reading...Shift is a fine novel and I'm some number of chapters into it, but I don't want to keep reading it right now. No gaming, so that basically rules out everything on the computer other than typing, since I said no internet. Hmmm...maybe I could drive somewhere, but I don't want to over do the trips to the mall for walking, 1 or 2 a day seems to be enough. Also, my typical thing to do for now is sort of "act like I haven't woken up until 2" since I am trying to be nice to myself for sleeping better and having woken up early, so I have been typically not eating or showering until 2. I don't think I want to exercise in the mornings....what shall I do? I already told Rosey that I am going to try to space out my visits with her to be only about once every two weeks, which she seemed to approve of, along with my other (perfectly legal to make) disclosures about IC/military technology to her that may help her understand household life better. AFAIK, Rosey understands a lot of English quite well...I think she has some ability to learn words from reading emotional cues, I don't think she understands every single thing I say, but I sort of think she knows how to "prioritize her attention" based on tone-of-voice cues, and I bet she can kind of tell if I'm just saying some sort of "generic 'good girl! what a good puppy!'" kind of thing, and when I'm saying something more content-heavy that she should try to parse the words of. That is just my guess though.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I also do not want to try to watch any TV shows. I think what I should do is some sort of "fun, easy, relaxing, psychological health activity"...something I can just type about and not get too "new STEM heavy" with, but just some sort of simple enough prompt-based idea for thinking of something to say about myself and the interactions I've had in some way that could maybe help my psychological health, particularly in terms of decreasing stress and anxiety and "ghost feelings of upsetness" that I can't explain. That is probably what I will do tomorrow...I'll probably try to design a prompt for that tonight and write it down on my computer, and then consider doing that tomorrow early on if I'm up early.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Hopefully I can think of something sort of mildly original and different from the usual psych activities I have done in the past.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Yo, I just have to let you know right now...the truth is, I thought of the 'Calculus Man' joke before anyone else, it was my idea. Everything else? It was exchanged for that joke by the creators of Superman. I'll show myself out now."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Something occurred to me this evening...probably, Sasha Burkhoff, whose names sounds like it was selected by her parents to sound like "the perfect name for a well-respected cryptologist," and thus a possible prospect as as NSA recruit as a mentally healthy student who had attended TJHSST in Virginia, had her brain-tumor-caused murder orchestrated initially by pro-life activists. According to my analysis, there is no other reason or group who would do it. I never actually spoke with Sasha, just saw and much later thought to recall a look she gave me when I think she had been diagnosed by the brain tumor, but I didn't have a strong emotional reaction, not that I was unkind or inappropriate about it in any way, but my sense of it is, she sounds like a target of pro-life religious extremists who didn't like TJHSST in general, didn't feel it was worth to murder me--they surely faced counter-attacks, probably including lethal ones, for their actions--since I was set up to be tortured as a math slave for years, and they could only pick out one student to kill to send a message about the NSA and the types of extremist fighters whom they might have felt would work there...in theory....so my sense of it is, even if she was a religious Christian and supported pro-life positions, she might have been targeted for not being "tough enough" on pro-choicer's, like my grandmother, who was kind to me although I am a liberal atheist...she even tried to not speak to me too much when I was physically present in the house, apparently that doesn't suffice for the extremists. Anyway, it is also certainly possible that Sasha was actively pro-choice. I think my theory is right. Relatedly, probably, Heath Ledger was murdered over some sort of political cause he had supported in a movie before The Dark Knight...I don't know what that would be, but my guess is, judging from Julia Stiles's comments about Ledger and Chrissy Teigen, who emotionally abused and harassed a gay man, according to what I read, he probably supported gay rights much more than actresses like Maggie Gylenhall and Julia Stiles felt comfortable...probably more "pro-choice, that's it, I just say I'm liberal" types.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, I realized that Dr. Kudurogianis was not evil...he is also facing threats, I'm sure, and did the amount of helpful psychiatric work that he felt he would be able to do safely...I think he omitted some "emotional distress" and "employment/socialization" issues due to reasons I would not understand, perhaps related to his safety or something else. I think it is fairly clear that the psychiatric treatment that he did helped me a lot...if I become suspicious that he was actually evil once again, based on me having noticed some detail that I hadn't seen before, I will probably be sure to post my latest theory about that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Great news for people who are on my side! I spent this morning beginning and planning out further work on a "STEM-based system for recovering psychologically from harassment attacks," so that I can use some of my best secret ideas to identify cognitive issues I may be having, including with "inclinations to snap at other angrily," feeling restricted from doing certain things for no good reason, not caring enough and feeling callous about people whom I'm trying to care about and ought to care about, and other issues, and use my competitively excellent ideas to work on "fixing the damage to my mind muscles/processes" so that I can "exercise those muscles" healthily and without pain so that I can get them to be stronger and working properly, as they were in the past and should be for my health and sense of identity/self-concept. Also good news: I think that given local residents' plots to sabotage me psychologically for whatever weird reason, this announcement will demoralize them, and my announcement that it will demoralize them will likely vex them if they want to start up more strange "Wile E. Coyote schemes" to "trick and deceive and psychologically 'hex'" me to feel or perform in a way that is not my best. I.e., I think they will start to realize that their weird and freaky endeavors to mess with me are not a good investment of their time, and they'll sense the regret and unhappiness they will feel later when they see that it didn't work and was all just a frankly pathetic waste of their time, and their movement to bother me will lose enthusiasm.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, my psychology activity for this morning was a big success! I have planned some more work on it to do tomorrow, during my main hours of activity during the day, after 2 p.m.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A comment about this ordeal: I note that there were *very many* people who, in this crisis situation for me, were essentially required to do enough of their part to "give me the password" to get out of trouble. A lot of people refused, in some cases citing right-wing extremist ideology, and in other cases citing threats to them and their families. The thing about the latter situation is, basically, a lot of people "passed the burden" to my family leading to at least two relatives dying, very likely murdered by the CIA, while the other people "wanted to play it safe." I.e., by not doing their jobs, they aggressively and inappropriately passed the "lack of safety burden" from their families to mine, causing damage. Thus, the "right to be outraged and to retaliate" lies with the people who are in my family who are unethical, not with them. Basically, the JACM, Cornell, and Cambridge University in Britain, murdered my grandmother and my uncle, citing, in a sense ,a desire to be safe by virtue of having a good, sustained relationship with political terrorists and mobsters in the CIA, who illegally kill innocent people to seek to pursue their political will.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said "people in my family who are ethical," that's an inserted typo.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Oh, Publix just started discriminating against me today...how original and surprising. I CuRrEnTlY have a very thick skin about this sort of thing, and it doesn't bother me or affect me that much...I will keep shopping there for now while I still live in this dumb area. It's just, "Say goodbye to all your appealing future career possibilities, Publix employees! You don't even know what you are doing professionally, at all, and the double entendre in this sentence is intended!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Regarding my job search...I can see 9 of the jobs I applied to on the panel on the job applications website; the region I applied to is in a different time zone in the USA. I am very qualified, and I applied last Wednesday. I hope I am not being locked out by another tiresome political attack on me for no reason, one that would have pointed at me no matter what I said or did, simply because I am a mentally atheist. Anyway, I only heard back from one employer so far, and they said no to my application. Hopefully I will hear more from the other employers within the next few days...how thoroughly did Donald Trump and his lieutenants seize control of the US job market??! I hope I won't wind up just sitting here, exerting political power by typing out things on Usenet, using new STEM ideas that I have that are under development that bad guys wouldn't understand because they are not able to "crack the code" of the English language! I would really prefer to be an employed private citizen, not an ongoing law-abiding anti-US-government antagonist using cutting edge STEM capabilities to trip up US political agendas pretty much every day! Gosh, I wish I could stop feeling compelled to mess with with the USA's secretly right-wing extremist, anti-Semitic, anti-Muslim, anti-atheist government for a week or two!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The US Democratic Party has never before been forced to negotiate a full, unconditional "political surrender" to anyone, have they? Well, if I'm still here in a couple months, you'll all get to find out that feels. Imagine an America with *NO LIBERALISM WHATSOEVER.* Are you excited to live in that world? Is that what you are voting for by denying my rights, or would you like to delude yourselves and side with Biden? Indeed, I *couldn't* convince the Democrats to stop hurting or be reasonable...I can't educate them on how to be smart and rational, all I can do is destroy everything everything they ever fought for, for me because I like me and I think my life and rights matter, and then keep attacking everyone, ruining everything they've gotten and fought for over the years, until they have nothing left and realize how dumb they were.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Would you be gentler in some way if I did what you did to me to one of you? No! You are doing things to me, and I haven't committed *one* crime against any of you or any of your backers. If I had eagerly served you and gotten nothing in returned, you would have tried to Auschwitz me anyway, and would not have backed no matter what. Get ready to see where this path with leads, I'm now apparently about to be your tour guide to a whole new America that you will not recognize and not like, because it will have been politically completely re-shaped by me with cutting edge science ideas, unless I am able to not face discrimination during my job search. How much is it worth to you? Did you, "everything?" Hint: Yes, and you're right! That's what it will cost. You're already paying a large percentage of the total possible cost, do you want to increase that or decrease that?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Basically, my failure was, I thought the US leaders were self-interested and smart. I thought they would be smart enough and not crazy, and would let me have my rights and let me go. I guess they are not that smart, and insist on being pummeled some more. Either that, or I'm gong to be getting interviewed sometime this week that's for sure.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Basically, at this point, if you have been a bad guy linked to the team of people who are homicidally stalking me, if you are not done with me by the end of this week and I am not actively interviewing for jobs, you will soon be done enjoying any benefits of American liberalism, period. I have the power to do that, no one else does. Did you miss what happened to Build Back Better, abortion rights, the US military's power, Biden's approval ratings, Democratic control of Congress, and even Donald Trump being used as a threat or having a viable candidacy, due to my use of my STEM powers and the US government's failure to heed my protest on behalf of my basic Constitutional rights? In that case, I even *told you fools* *exactly* what I was doing, STEM-wise. Next time, it will be a different set of excellent capabilities, and I will not tell you a think about what I'm doing, it will devastate Democrats politically, you won't be able to guess what I'm doing with algorithms or anything else, and it will all be perfectly legitimate and in accordance with the rules. Now let me go or face the consequences!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I did a great job on my STEM research task today...things are coming along extremely well, and my work is even more fun than usual. I have more such work to do tomorrow.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Regarding the conflict: To say it again another way: The clear and repeated and persistent, un-American argument of my opponents who think I should be caged and not allowed to socialize, date, or have a job, is: "We have every right to ignore the separation of church and state and freedom of religion in the US Constitution, because we would prefer to view atheists as cattle, with worthless lives, whom the government has the right to slaughter or try to slaughter, without any respect for their rights or feelings, at any time that we choose, with no regard for any laws. We may also slaughter people like cattle that we see as 'failing to dehumanize atheists' and being too friendly with them." That is the kind of extremist you've signed up to support if you're backing Biden and his cronies. You don't want to go there, it's roughly the same thing as anti-Semitism.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A couple of developments:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 1 - It looks like the mall has changed its hours, and now it closes at 7 p.m. I don't think it used to...I wonder if the Christian church that meets in two of the store-type areas had something to do with the change, to make a statement about me?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 2 - It occurred to me this evening that some time ago, someone credible hinted to me that I was likely being considered for the position of Secretary of Defense some time ago. I might have been the youngest one if my various promotions and career achievements hadn't been sabotaged! It is probably a good idea for me to mention this at this time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A dramatic reflection on my recent learning endeavors:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Ze codes, Mr. Vite. Ze codes! Now you see...velcome to schizophrenia, ze codes, zey make you genius!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I seem to be mostly out of jokes though. Remember when I said--rapped, rather:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "If I say things are like things and express opinion
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Each booty babe will fail to not become my minion"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ...remember when that seemed like it was going to be true?? What happened????!! All those comedic rap songs, and all I got was...uh...deniably video messaged by Zara Larsson and then blocked. Step up to the plate, yo! You only live once, and there's only one me. My arrogance, like so much else, knows no bounds...just as it is with my physics knowledge, I'm one of a kind! Now, in a space-time continuum sense, it is all women in the USA who are desperate, deep down, maybe unconsciously, to meet me, and not the other way around! Again, it's like Linkin Park always envisioned for me: "So [he's] waitin' until the upper hand is [his]....". Don't disrespect the prophecy, yo!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Would that I could calibrate my jokes to be funnier, for the perfect audience...forsooth.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (Yes, this again.)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, I do not actually know if Zara Larsson is a Nazi who supports murdering me for being an atheist. I wrote above assuming she was not.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, regarding the Richard Dawkins Tweet: Here is a really good idea; I would think that every single US citizen who is currently residing in the US, has heard of me or met me and heard what happened to me, is alive and feeling well, and never supported right-wing extremism, and didn't get a chance to get in touch when I demanded to be contacted between Sept 2020 and the present, ought to send me an email, at least wishing me well, maybe offering to see if there is anything such a person could do to help me, given that I will have basically just gotten out of a de facto American (??!) concentration camp.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The obvious question about why any such person who would read this and then not get in touch with me is, "Why not?," and it would tend to suggest that such a person, given my insistence and biography and status as a virtuous bipolar American atheist, would either feel "extremely threatened by a still-tyrannical US government," or, more likely, would be a "radicalized right-wing extremist residing in America who supports ethnic cleanings operations, against the mentally ill, against atheists, and against black people residing in Africa." Otherwise, why wouldn't such a person at least send a quick email checking it? It would seem to suggest some sort of "mass radicalization epidemic" that hit the USA, that would have hit the people who refused to contact me, and that there is indeed, as Fox News suggested when speaking of a "silent majority," that a very large number of people in the USA have apparently converted to fascism. Otherwise, I would receive at least a quick "glad you're feeling better' email for sure, from everyone who had heard of me, given that I would be like Anne Frank if she had managed to just finish escaping from a Nazi concentration camp...surely all of the people who wished her well and didn't support her being tortured and murdered by Nazis would want to send her an email congratulating her on her escape and wishing her well? There could be no other explanation, of course.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK, so I am going to go to bed soon. I am pleased that, looking at the text I've written and the lack of any coherent response to it or accusation from government officials or anyone else with authority, it is clear that it has been clear, for months now, that I am totally and 100% a victim of right-wing extremists in government and beyond...I am not a bad guy and never deserved this. So that is good.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, my science projects are going well. I am feeling a little bit mildly restless at night--it is hard to tell how much of that is due to the wake-ups from the government-linked bad guys--but mostly I feel fine each day. Just bored, ready for things to change so that I can get out of here and have a real, normal life as I and other innocent people deserve to have. I am one of the smartest and most talented people in the world now, so in spite of my set backs, I am a fairly fortunate person in terms of talent and long-term (decades-type term) outcome...I'm sure I'll be doing great in my 40's, I'll just be a little bit older and past my prime physically. Mentally, I'll surely still be the best theorem prover in the world, and that will be the source of my talent, which I'll be sure to stockpile and keep to myself.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So...I am trying to think of ways to relax at night. I looked at the YouTube videos again, and in spite of my different viewing choices, they are all completely *useless*, the recommendations totally suck and it is unpleasant even looking at the thumbnails on the main page. Now that I'm avoiding Twitter due to discrimination, I am starting to feel like groups.google.com is the only site I ever want to visit, except for maybe checking my email accounts on Yahoo and Gmail, and also occasionally glancing at cnn.com, which is also a crap website, but I ought to know a few of the top headlines that are not being covered up at any given time. So yeah. I am finding writing in my offline files to be more productive and interesting than anything there is to do online. I like typing in my offline files and walking, and eating, and I wish I could socialize and date and maybe have sex. Other than that, I'm not all that limited...I can't do work for money yet, perhaps due to government limitations, but I can still exert more political and other power than anyone else in the world...I'll have all my latest ideas set up and ready to use soon, and I'll just type what I want to type on Usenet, and see how that goes. It should have an impact, and again, it won't be unethical or against the law....I'll be sure. So my "job," coming soon if I'm not released or employed, will be writing appropriate STEM-backed posts, in captivity, on the internet to continue to exert my political will on the world. I should be allowed to socialize and friends--I'm a perfectly nice and quite normal person, I follow the rules, don't do anything wrong, just file complaints about the epidemic of weirdos bothering me and never start fights, always do the right thing, never do any weird or creepy/strange things to other people like try to "scare them" or follow them around or harass them, always behave appropriately and like I should. Anyway, I'll see where this ends pretty soon I'm sure...the bad guys, I don't think, can take many more losses...I mean they can, but they really wouldn't look like they are even employed if they keep pushing with this, I don't get how such high-power leaders of the US, in such a competitive field, can be so completely stupid, irrational, nakedly and publicly pro-extremism and pro-terrorism, and able to still maintain approval ratings of about 30%. I admit, I'm quite stunned by that capability....how can such incompetent figure out a way to keep their jobs without ever doing them, how on earth do they do that? I'm not jealous and don't want to copy that, but the example is stunning and interesting in its own right, like Caligula's success as a Roman leader.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Once again, I am thinking some more about Richard Dawkins' Tweet. Liar drops R; maybe that means, Joe Biden drops Regency Mall, without the monolith, i.e., I will get hired based on the region I correctly applied to. If so, great! That will be excellent. My usual "Donkey Kong dance," not that I think mentally ill people should be considered apes, but I'm thinking of the "aggressive impactful stomping" of sorts, before big event relevant to me that might be sabotaged that may require a "vocally aggressive send-off to the immediate predecessor time" just before the full result is in, to pre-attack in case I've been "foiled again by a pinball-tilt wizard with no ethics or sense of 'gosh, that was too much, enough is enough,'" is basically contained above in some of the writing. I basically always do that, in this situation where I post a lot in public, right before I think that something big and important I'm working towards is about to possibly be sabotaged into not working right again, based on an initial "bad sign," which just be an incidental thing and nothing to worry about over all.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I'm thinking maybe I will get a job. I hope so. I'm going to turn the computer off pretty soon and get more fully ready to fall asleep.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, I am a little bit worried about: the guy with the bald head who used to also walk on Quioccasin Road who I think was mentally ill, Kristen, who sometimes walked on Quioccasin Road and seemed to have disappeared recently, and the guy that I saw who was black who seemed like he was mentally ill on Quioccasin, and the white guy who looked like he liked to wear military camouflage type of clothing and a hat whom I would see on Quioccasin road...there was also the black guy that I called "nodding head man" who used to bother me, he might have been mentally ill, and maybe I shouldn't blame him for having bothered me by nodding his fast when I was very much more sensitive and messed up due, I think, to trauma-related mental illness. Is anyone going to help them if they are still in trouble and not where they want to be in life yet? They looked like they were totally shunned by the local community and very under-supported, if they did indeed have mental health problems...probably they weren't even all identifying as atheists. I hope that my "monolith" will be their "monolith," too, i.e., that they will be able to get out of isolation, if they're in isolation in the Tuckahoe area and not already out of isolation.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A couple more comments:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Yeah I trained my "inner word-fighter persona" in melee combat with Ras al CVS. I stole the power to be extremely rude, with or without a reason of any sort.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - This morning, I noticed that my neck and shoulders felt a little weird and sort of sore, like it would feel comfortable to rest my head by tilting it to the right, like I was Stephen Hawking who was paralyzed and had his head looking like it was at an angle in his wheelchair, at least that was my perception...maybe it was not actually at much of an angle, checking the photos on Google briefly. It sounds like a nasty joke about me and atheists and highly competent STEM people, and I received a credible psych hint about the government-linked gesture doing this, suggesting that it is not a total surprise, perhaps, and a psych professional somewhere knew that a gesture of this nature would be done at some point, and maybe the perpetrator's psychological state and behavior are not necessarily hard to explain or predict, to an extent, at all. Yes, there is probably something psychological to be learned from my own initial explorations into basic amateur psychology...what did I reach for first, how is my "first-choice" lens to reach for characterized? Whatever. I'm mainly pivoting back to "easy psych ideas," just because my psych "research," amateur and not valuable/competitive or not, is mainly just to help me improve my own health for now, not to win any "innovative psychology research contests" or anything along those lines. I'm more interested in competing, vaguely speaking, at "applied math that I can use to get ahead at almost anything performance-related," in a variety of different contexts.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Remember: It is the lives of Nazis and other intolerant right-wing extremists that are worthless, not the lives of the people that they target and despise.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > youtube.com/watch?v=C9SiRNibD14&embeds_euri=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2F&source_ve_path=MjM4NTE&feature=emb_title
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yes, this video is sad. Science is a good thing--the means to power, health, safety, technological progress, and often prosperity.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, it is concerning that this woman from Africa is trying to like Newton's scientific achievements with colonization. There is no evidence that science is linked to discrimination or exploitation of minority groups or people outside of the US.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A concern is that many people would argue that people who want to support colonizing or otherwise support exploiting Africa ought to be killed, i.e., if it is not illegal in your country to kill someone who wants to support fascism or slavery-like activities, then it would not be a bad idea to kill that person, like killing a Confederate or Nazi soldier in battle; the lives of confirmed fascists are worthless, and within the constraints of US law in America, ought to be either imprisoned, killed, or otherwise removed from relevance and ideally prosperity, as soon as possible. That goes for anyone who wants to eliminate some or all people from a particular legitimate background as though they had no rights, whether the background is ethnic, religious, or something else not related to "being an evil predatory fascist."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I am hoping that she does not mean that she thinks that pro-science people should be killed. Sadly, if she adopted such a position and pushed for it, she would put herself into a very bad category. I am speaking about this because I believe that people in Africa, who may have been denied some Western educational benefits, deserve more of a chance to turn around mistaken behavior and not support hurting pro-science people, including science-interested students in school who might not thrive without education...although that is different from wanting "pro-science people killed," and she didn't say that she wanted that, I am just worried about the claimed connection between colonialism and science.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My point is that people who support murder and fascism become, after a certain possible grace period of controversial length, people with worthless lives. Most people who fought for Naziism in WW2 ought not be given a chance to "tell everyone they're sorry and repent," that's good enough. There are some fascists from different parts of history that should not be allowed out of jail for 500 years. I still oppose the death penalty avidly, but any person who converts to fascism, while not losing his or her rights as a possibly accused criminal person or not, loses the "desirability of their existence," although it might be illegal to kill them without a trial.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So my point is, do not ever join forces with fascists, no matter what opinions you may have about people from backgrounds other than your own--you may champion your beliefs and backgrounds, but never support the denial of rights or the denial of desirability of other people being alive, unless such people are fascists, i.e., people who themselves deny the desirability of being alive to others over a mere beliefs-based disagreement that does involve calling for the deaths of innocent, "maybe just wrong" people, as opposed to true fascists.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said, "that's not good enough."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Someone outside signaled me to "see Bill Gates," so I did.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > What is he saying? "PW aim [is getting close with] the world" ? What, now for the first time? Is this some sort of reverse psychology trick?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Why didn't Microsoft offer to hire me, since it understood my talent all along?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My aim is to have my own life, withhold my STEM talents as punishment for the "slavery and extraction" initiative that political terrorists backed, presumably because they didn't want me to get big at DOD because criminals in STEM business, like Zuckerberg and possibly also Gates--I don't know--might fear my rules-based leadership and top-notch talent at STEM. I also want to help Africa. Is there some sort of claim that I have been inconsistent in anything I said?? Is it claimed that my chemistry disclosure, related to BQP = P and disease cures, somehow does *not* cure cancer?? Please, check with an expert who still trusts you, if you can find one! I am definitely no longer "crank" by any measure, and I never was one, just somewhat ignorant about classical mechanics and other areas of physics--I had been quite behind on studying, now I am not--I don't have a deep understanding of relativity, general or special, but I get the very basics of QM, and I understand classical mechanics well.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Bill Gates must not smear me, or risk being seen as "just another big-money-man cheater who fought his way to the top, became 'a king of having money,' and added no value to the world," just as the excellent researcher and publisher CS Christos Papadimitriou seems to have predicted, sort of.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I *will* help Africa if I can make the money. Why wouldn't I? Is it claimed that I cannot, that I don't have the will to spend money on such things? Does Gates actually believe that a condition for my freedom, as a brilliant, totally innocent atheist who is much better at math, CS, and engineering than he is, even as a top-ranked business leader, is that I must "serve the world" with my STEM talents, publishing free "naked photos of all the things that make me powerful," so that he can make money from them and not I? I've given more than enough free STEM gifts to the world, it is time for me to be *compensated* for my work, and also, well past time for me to be liberated--unlike Gates, I've never been credibly accused of committing a serious crime.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe Gates is questioning why I have lost interest in STEM. Oh, is he pretending that he doesn't know a certain fact about computers, or does he actually not know?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, if Gates is not a fascist or homicidal criminal at least, I *demand* his full support for my release. He should have offered to buy my IP, but not being a likely candidate for being ethical, he probably would never do that. I have nothing to fear from a "lacking Bill Gates like" as long as I do not work as a STEM worker in the STEM industry; his "like" is irrelevant in my new chosen field.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A question about the local community:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Are most citizens in the Tuckahoe area *actually* claiming that they "don't really have free speech rights or the right to peaceably assemble near me," or is that another fake-out attempt? If they believe that, do they accept that, and is their defense against further curtailments against their rights, due to their crimes, that "no one has the capability to do anything to us, so we're just going to keep doing our way?" I think that attitude will not get a good outcome; no one wants to tell you how certain techniques for dealing with "right-wing bad guy daredevils" are sometimes used to fight back.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Whatever that other post says on my thread, I am not reading it.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, the Little League tragedy of today is, Publix once again was deliberately out of YoCrunch (they claimed credit for it yesterday). Clearly, there is only one question about this situation: Will I, or will I not, get into volunteer "Retail Rap" under the rapper name, "Cashier Fatherf---er For Fun," and how many cashier careers will I mercilessly ruin with the awesome power of the pen?? IS there a limit to how much damage I can enjoy myself while sustaining it and waiting for whatever to happen? Who knew hurting bad-guy people's lives could be so fun???
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yo, I gotta start right there, I can't just leave that hanging, yo....
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > UNTITLED RAP
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > by Cashier Fatherf---er For Fun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yo, my name is Manheim, they think they're Julia Right
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A Stiles motherpredecessor, ring it up as a fight, yo...
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I can't delete losers as fast as I shop, but
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I would compete to get losers' heads on a justice chopping block
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > You know, I am an artist--my words are OK--because, I
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Fight relentlessly to just prove I'm still not gay, because I
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Am gay deep down, unless it's a statement to show, that
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm not intimidated by deletions of Yo-
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Crunch, um, you knew that was coming 'cause I rap about me
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I channel adrenaline and I charge a fee, you see
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The metaphorical gun flash but you think there's no gun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > And yeah, it's just a metaphor, I smoked you for fun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > [begin snare]
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm not Obama--I just snort Confederates when stuck on an island
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > If I write aggressive raps and die will they scream, "Oh, why, man??!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Does anyone miss anyone without a new rap atmosphere?--no.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I thought I proved to them my strength is from being non-sex-queer, though.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quirky adrenaline, you'll never trace it down, guys
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I spurt technologies, and you lose blood like dead flies
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > You sign up for death and more death and I'm totally blameless
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I thought He'd cancel you, but everyone's shameless.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > [guitar solo]
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I need an outro that returns to the central
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Theme of my rap which is that you are all no-go's
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I use that word and not the p-slur--I'm perfect
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Still bag the groceries miss, your life is now worthless.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > That's my rap song! What do you think? I feel comfortable asserting that viciously insulting intransigent law breaker cashiers is not harassment or stalking, as long as I don't name names or say anything directly in public. I have a right to make political speech, in the form of art, whether your like it or not. A lot of people are saying that they hate me for stupid reasons, why not get more insulting, see if they like it more? Maybe some professional rapper will come out and say how much they hate me too, I'll be sure to quiver. Also, I'm still under duress, as anyone can see! The hate-fueled nightmare is supposed to never end according to them, I don't have to persuade you, if you don't know how to think, it's your graves, Confederacy punks! Fascists always lose! Don't delude yourselves about exactly what you are! Note, retail work is fine, if you do it WITHOUT trying to intimidate, harass, gaslight, or discriminate against people. Let's see how juiced up Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren will get this time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > That was fun. Now on to other things.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yeah that's right I was actually mean, once. What!!!!!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > No I am not going to publish any new STEM ideas to help the military or other goons. I'm immune to all manipulative tricks, I'm done outputting STEM, forever, you're on your own, losers.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm starting to worry that Biden shut down my job search in another state, too. The job was one I was extremely qualified for, and I still haven't heard anything positive from any of the jobs I applied to.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So...do all geographic regions in the USA support the idea that Biden is completely control of law-abiding, intelligent religious minorities' members being able to get a job, literally anywhere? Can Biden shut down good career moves for any atheist in the USA? I suspect that the answer is yes, and no one will talk about it...I hope something really nasty and permanent happens to the people who are making sleazy deals of this nature, in clear support of anti-atheist fascism.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway...I don't know what to do next, I have fought and worked as hard as almost anyone ever could, but just as Einstein would have trouble getting out of a concentration camp if he had stayed in Germany for too long, all my talents and work and digging deep, and really exerting myself to try to look out for myself and exercise my legal rights and get a good job have thwarted by vastly populated legions, sadly, of American right-wing extremists. They are not being challenged enough, they have largely taken over the economy of the country, and contrary to my initial belief, it looks like they do not merely control STEM and retail.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > FYI, I am not saying it is a Jewish conspiracy, in case someone thinks that I sound like some sort of bad guy who is claiming that "Jews are trying to control everything." It is not Jewish people, it is American political crooks. WHEN will they cut this out? It has been almost 12 years, I tried asking nicely and appealing to reason and the evidence and my innocence, I tried demonstrations of my STEM talent and was just smeared (e.g., with the Hodge Conjecture, my logic result, the twin prime conjecture, etc.), I finally resorted to aggressively attacking the fascist leaders who are perpetrating this...what am I supposed to do? What is any person in my position, being innocent and just mentally ill and an atheist, supposed to do to get away from extra-judicial assaults and "containment efforts" made against by government-employed fascists?? Someone is supposed to fix this! I could warn of the consequences--some of them have already been faced--but I am growing tired of that. Don't try to convert the USA to a racist dictatorship, that is not good for anyone. Leave me alone and let me work!!! Fascists deserve death, not liberals!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just realized something: The government still thinks it's going to use "stress" and "psychological manipulation" to manipulate my mood and feelings, and put me in great distress--probably with a few more "false hope" things, then "choking incidents," then "weird and confusing signals that seem to be about something important...but what are they really saying?", and try to manipulate me into changing my mind into publishing more STEM.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > In the past, I definitely changed my mind about publishing differential equations--I thought it would help, and it probably did...it probably ended the US's ability to be a navy and air force superpower, basically permanently, unless more help would be provided by me.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I do not share things at random. I try to do what is in my interests, whether I'm stressed out and desperate (I probably won't be in the near future at all) or not. I have done a really good job on working on being able to relax. I AM NOT GOING TO PUBLISH ANY MORE STEM. I made sure, after I changed my mind on diff eq publication, to also change my mind and "declare law-abiding war on the US Department of Defense," and I did that, and I won...I tossed them a breakable code using BPP = P, and they can use it, but it doesn't matter--all their secret things were lost to their adversaries via flight surveillance and cryptology during the no-codes phase.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I won the war on DOD, they just want to deny it, and now shower THEMSELVES with false hope and optimism, thinking that they are "such great Christian guys, of COURSE they'll get it back, the US NEVER loses like this," precisely because the US has never been this morally wrong-headed or right-wing and extremist before; the US declared war on terrorism in 2001, and thus itself in the near future--today.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I WILL NEVER PUBLISH MORE STEM TO HELP THE GOVERNMENT FOR ANY OTHER REASON. It is over, I am keeping it to myself to fuel other endeavors, I am *never* going to try to help *anyone*, other than my own children, with STEM sharing or explanation efforts, EVER AGAIN.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe that will clarify some things.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > My day today was fairly pleasant. I had to go to Food Lion to get YoCrunch because Publix still wouldn't stock it...whatever. I will probably write more "rather absurd rap songs" to exercise my sense of humor, since I can't even talk right now, but I'll probably be more light-hearted and less mean in the future.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Somewhat disappointingly, my schedule for my day tomorrow is basically exactly the same as my schedule for today. I worked for more than an hour on my math research task today, which was great and yielded some good ideas. I am still continuing the same research tomorrow, and I might do it for at most 2 more days before I move on. I am only doing real work for 1-2 hours a day right now, and I'm still on my gaming break. I might stay on that, unless I get more headaches soon.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > I am starting to think that the end of this will have nothing to do with getting the job I was trying to get from the job search. Do I have to wait for the government to relent? What about waiting for the wildly nutty local citizens to relent? I don't see what they are thinking or afraid of or doing, why are they *all* *still* siding with fascist ideologies, do they think they will get some sort of warmth and protection from that? That is not a good move, side with the truth, good values, patriotism, the US Constitution, and me, not code-talking terrorist linked insider threat bad guys who "have a job in the government." I had a job in the government, let me tell you, that helps you 0% with law enforcement, whether you mention it or not, if you get arrested or TDO'd (I have never been arrested, but I have been TDO'd, twice by police, sometimes even improperly, shortly after quitting jobs as an NSA contractor...it changes nothing, which is how it is supposed to work). I.e., even if you think you have power from a government position and try to abuse it, the police will just ignore that. It's just a job, it's not a magical "becoming a king or queen" ceremony, you really shouldn't see government employees as "larger than life," they're mostly very inefficient and ineffective at getting things done at the office.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > So anyway...I am trying to be calm, since it's getting late. I am trying to relax and not vent any more angry feelings or "creative interpretations for debate/persuasion/etc." about this nonsense. I wonder what it will take for me to be spoken to again? I don't know. I might take a break from all work pretty soon, but then I wouldn't know what to do with all my time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yeah, I wonder what the end of this will look like. Which will happen first? Will local residents come to their senses and stop backing fascists and code-talking liars? Will I get a job? Will someone from another state or another country write to me? Will the DOD write to me to apologize for their huge mistake/crime? Will the news run a story forcing a bad US political leader to resign, decreasing interest in this "project?" I don't know, but I've waited for over a decade for justice and access to my Constitutional rights!! What a farce, I don't know for sure what exactly these people are thinking.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I'm going to try to have a pleasant night.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > So, now that night-time is here, I note I would probably feel more relaxed if I typed something relaxing. Who knows why. I should be high-energy and full of comments and ideas and even a little bit of aggression during the day--I just remembered that I said I was going to stop being aggressive, but it is sometimes hard to remember all the different changes I wanted to make to improve my psych health, it's not that important that I stick to that, it is just important that I never publish STEM again.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I think the "monolith" is: Regency Mall drops Regency, i.e., when the local mall loses its administrative authority given to it on behalf of a monarch. What authority is that? What exactly can they do? I think Dawkins' subsequent comment, which came out to "clatter lordie," suggests that the Christian church there got investigated for extremism after my comment...I did see a little bit of evidence of that, some man inside one of their areas made a sort-of Nazi salute gesture at me, I mainly just ignored that, that sort of thing is pretty common around here.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe I should disclose more strange mall activity?...they keep sending groups of young men with one overweight chesty woman by to say things, the group today yelled "penis" when I looked at them, and the woman made eye contact with me and said something like "bye bye Kyle," which is the first name of a male patient at Dominion Hospital that I went to see Dr. Steg in 2001. Maybe it helps to repeat these things, I don't know. I heard some other man say "bye Felicia" loudly a while ago, a number of days ago, at the mall. I heard a woman who looked pretty and might have been Hispanic talking on the phone, near the "escape rooms" thing with her group of friends, and I heard her say, "I have a reservation" over the phone, perhaps she was from out of town.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Last time with the overweight chesty woman, the code was something like "a cost" then "most sag" and then the code had like "two sniffles" after that, I don't know what they were trying to say. Whatever, I don't get the point or message of what they're trying to do, it sounds unfriendly. I saw a group of teenagers coming by, and they made some sort of like aggressive gesture while looking at me, like, "WHAT?!", and I didn't pay that much attention to them.
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > There was a large group of people singing in the Christian church area a few days ago. Today, a black man in a Harvard sweatshirt came out of the bottom of the elevator, holding a staff or stick or whatever. Today, I saw a security guy on one of those electronic rolling segue thing, making some sort of gesture. I saw a guy like that working for security before; he did that when I first started walking there, then the next a different security guy started quickly shaking his head at me, then I complained, then there were two security workers sitting at a desk, and one of them sort of "put their hands up," a lot like one of the female workers at Food Lion did one time. I don't know the gang codes at all, I'm just posting to maybe help "drop the regency of Regency Mall," maybe it will work!
> > > > > > > > > > > > Actually, no, DOS, "roboticdeepthroatconditioning.mil" is not a good idea for a web-based app for your upcoming startup. Get a little more creative, there actually are some fascists out there who are even better at thinking and science than you.
> > > > > > > > > > > Rap About Walking In the RVA Area, Etc.
> > > > > > > > > > > by Broom Philip
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > I've got to find a place to walk every day
> > > > > > > > > > > The FBI is like shut down, so criminals may
> > > > > > > > > > > Do what they want to do whenever they want
> > > > > > > > > > > Follow me through shopping malls, grocery stores, and Deep Run Park
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > So I am writing a rap to kill some time, you know
> > > > > > > > > > > I see the anarchists have killed fighting crime, and so
> > > > > > > > > > > My free time's spent on research food and health
> > > > > > > > > > > While the world is acting like it's favored by stealth
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > They think the secret spies stalk their enemies better
> > > > > > > > > > > If they can't see it, they think, it makes women wetter
> > > > > > > > > > > The movie-like atmosphere of intriguing spy pirates
> > > > > > > > > > > Is, they think, the beauty of all violence in silence
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > The rap is weak today 'cause it's just a drill
> > > > > > > > > > > You'd rather have just me and not the FBI chill, but
> > > > > > > > > > > Indeed you wanted Sin City but got Gotham instead
> > > > > > > > > > > You think you're safest when your eyes are closed in bed
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > My self-expression requires no apology, now
> > > > > > > > > > > They changed god to mysteriousness in their brand new theology, now
> > > > > > > > > > > The Christian church no longer has its true savior
> > > > > > > > > > > And, they think forgiveness green lights every behavior.
> > > > > > > > > > Here is my latest prediction of how it will end: On March 14 or so, 18 days after Dawkins' Tweet, Biden has predicted in public in code that Vladimir Putin will be killed by a US-linked drone strike, and then Biden's approval ratings will go up and he'll look more likely to win the 2024 election. The truth is, though, the capabilities to be dominant, air-force-wise, over Russia have been removed for the US; they cannot possibly have the power to do that sort of assassination any more--no country has that kind of power any more, at least not over the top developed nations with the GDP to support "the standard air force." Perhaps the bad guys will finally drop me and admit assaulting me wasn't worth it, even taking morality out of the equation. *Hopefully* they will regain a sliver of their sanity.
> > > > > > > > > Update regarding my job search: I think I did apply to the right region--a place that is not against, e.g., LGBTQ people--and I think that there are firms that would like to reach out to me. My guess is, some political group essentially made "huge threats" against the firms that seemed likely to communicate with me, and there is a "brief pause for a battle," that the employers will win. So far, none of the 10 or so firms I applied to have written back except one...I bet they will, and it will just take a while, due to political pressure, which one of the firms even says it does not value above equal opportunity, even in cases of stalking.
> > > > > > > > A comment on an excerpt from the article linked to on Richard Dawkins' Twitter:
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > https://www.spectator.co.uk/article/who-really-discovered-dnas-structure/
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > "This is a story replete with competition, friction, misunderstanding and some sexism, but it lacks anything truly unethical, let alone criminal. Four men and one woman, none of whom was perfect ... "
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > What? "...it lacks anything truly unethical..." ??! How exactly can one claim that refusing to cite someone else's research contribution, particularly when there was a huge breakthrough with big incentivized possibilities on the table, not being cited is not unethical?? I believe they were truly paying attention, and got press and thus an opportunity to correct themselves...it is very unethical to fail to cite research contributions, unless it is an accident and, once this is pointed out, a full and profuse apology is made by the non-citers. Researchers, including me, very often do not get paid anything beyond, in the cases of Ph.D. professors, "acceptable satisfaction of publishing requirements" to keep their jobs--I don't know if there are raise calculations involved--and so it is very important to cite research and things that contribute to research whenever a publication is done. I try to do so even informally when, in the past, I published things on the internet.
> > > > > > > I also watched the first three minutes of this:
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E3bLSePqCvc&feature=youtu..be
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > Interestingly, I didn't know about natural selection before I was in middle school myself...it is interesting to think about different education curriculums in different countries. I think I got better at understanding it in 9th grade. Also, I was very interested in genetic algorithms in college...before I figured out how to actually solve the discrete logarithm problem, one of my early attempts was based on genetic algorithms.
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > One way to view the idea of evolution speed--since you might wonder, with respect to what metric or dimension are you defining speed, or change with time?--is to think about some way to formalize the idea of "changes to the 'fitness function'" in a collection of evolving entities over generations.
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > You could argue that breeding is likely to bring about "very large changes to the minimum Hamming distance between possible binary Turing machine indexes that could be used to represent each fitness function." I don't actually know that much about biological evolution--is it just the genetic code that evolves and mutates, or is there more to it than that??--but I think my idea is good.
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > Just so you know, I count that as "discussion of STEM ideas," not publication of anything truly new or revolutionary. I.e., I am talking about something I know in STEM, not trying to "serve anyone" with more valuable research disclosures.
> > > > > > An amusing thing I just realized: It is almost certainly true that Abigail Spanberger has actually *never* worked for the CIA, and made up the whole claim to bolster career as a political leader. It sounds like she did not get a job there...I realized that there is something that she would definitely know if she had successfully obtained a TS/SCI clearance at that particular agency. It's actually quite funny.
> > > > > I just realized that Stephen Cook and probably Kaveh Ghasemloo are probably good guys, and that Neil Immerman, although he proved P = NP in the 1980's, and Michael Sipser are likely bad guys who supported trafficking me. Timothy Chow is of course also bad. It would also appear that Sara More, the professor who gave a talk to the math department introducing me to the discrete logarithm problem, was also actually a bad guy all along, although that talk did influence me in a good way and launch my research career. All of the UMW professors, including math and CS professors, and all of the UVA professors that I briefly saw at an engineering building there when I took the GREs, which might have had my score modified by the bot, were all evil and supportive of the bad-guy government efforts to surveil and enslave and torture me, too. Additionally, all of the psych and other doctors I saw outside of Dr. Steg were evil, before I saw Dr. K, including Welton and others...basically, I won't say how I know but it is not illegal for me to say it, all of them would have *tried* to get in touch with me if they hadn't supported trafficking and torturing me, like the child predators that they all always were, and I would have found out about the effort...I am now at a point where I can *prove* that they were bad guys felons who were against me, but I refuse to say how i know.
> > > > >
> > > > > So that is my update for now.
> > > > Quote of the evening:
> > > >
> > > > "News flash, Jennifer Polacks (that's all of you): None of you are 'cute and funny' like you think, all of you are pathetic pedophiles, who should be locked away or shot in the head and thrown in a ditch, whichever you make easier and more convenient for normal people who care about normal things and aren't idiotic freaks that no one has ever liked."
> > > A few comments:
> > >
> > > - People who are fascists do have worthless lives, but they should not try to commit suicide. Instead, they should repent, be sorry, talk about what they did, try to change themselves, and try to get themselves sent to jail, so that they can pay whatever debt they have to society, whether that's life in prison or less than that.
> > > - Thinking about it, I do know that my father really worked for DOJ....I don't know that he actually definitely ever worked for OPR, but when I was a kid, I went to his office one time, so I know he really worked there. At the same time, I am skeptical that my mother actually got a master's degree in mathematics and economics, and worked for Booz Allen Hamilton as a defense contractor before I was born. I do not know that my mother is ever honest about anything, at this point. She had a friend, named Jacqui, whom my sister and I called "Aunt Jacqui," whom my mother claimed worked for the CIA. My mother and I and maybe my sister too visited "Aunt Jacqui's" apartment in Northern VA one time, but I'm now not sure that she actually worked for the CIA. There are a lot of things that my parents said when I was young that may not have been true...I think my family history, on my Dad's side is true, but I don't know too much about my mom's family, and many of them seem to be not possessing great values. I don't know that my Uncle Skip was in the military and electrocuted in some sort of "water and electricity related accident," and I can't be sure that my mother's father was really an electrician whom my mother "taught herself basically from his textbook which she called the 'cook book' when she was a child." My mother claims to run a tax preparation business and take many "tax courses" without having a CPA; she did always talk on the phone a lot, and I know that she claimed to have that "tax preparation business" as early as when I was 3. I don't know if any of that was true.
> > I said "taught herself basic high school algebra from ..." .
> Another thing that my parents said that I think may not have been true: They met a dance class, and both of them had been very sought after...Mom always had men that she wasn't interested making overtures to dating her, but she didn't like any of them until she met Dad. Dad told me one time when I was like 15 that "there's always someone who's interested in dating you, you just have to not care too much--my friend in the Army when I was cook in Vietnam when I was drafted before I wrote letters with my friend to get out of the military--so you just have to ask. One time, a woman said to me during a job interview, 'I like movies,' and that is how I knew she was interested."
>
> Even with the things I was told over the years that apparently were lies--I think my parents were extremely strange and deviant, quite mentally ill, very intelligent, not interested in getting help for themselves, and much much more into lying and fabrication than I had ever realized at all--I still knew very little about my parents. I don't know if my Dad ever had a girlfriend other than my Mom, and I kind of thought Mom never did have another boyfriend, but she never said either. It occurred to me that my Dad probably worked in Organized Crime as one of the divisions of DOJ that he was a lawyer at--I think he really worked there--so that he can learn about, e.g., which doctors could be persuaded to commit crimes for him, and probably, before I was born, he selected a geographic region with schools so that I would be sent to schools that had teachers linked to organized crime...indeed, when I was like 9, I had a swimming lesson with a swimming teacher named "Rufus," who lifted up my swim trunks to reveal my butt at the South Run Rec Center when I was swimming at one of the last lessons...I later learned, at Lake Braddock in my Latin 2 class, that he was a history teacher at Lake Braddock, because I saw him come out of his classroom, which was right next to Ms. Conklin's Latin 2 class that I was in one time.
>
> Basically, I know almost nothing about my parents, except for who their relatives are. There seems to have been overwhelming support for trafficking me from all the neighborhoods I lived in and schools I attended...I haven't heard one "appropriate response," and I know how the system works and how people might think they can "cover their tracks" and pretend that they had no ability to help me or talk to me during the thing...it looks like Virginia very much "lost the battle for its good name to organized crime." It seems like a very large percentage of people I had interacted with over my life were in on this, I *know* what people can and can't do, to contact me and whatnot, better than they awarea and probably better than they do.

On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 8:34:08 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 8:22:06 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 8:07:17 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 8:04:54 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:52:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:43:16 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:25:33 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 4:44:00 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 4:35:29 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 2:06:33 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 12:18:11 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 11:48:48 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:00:40 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 10:15:18 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 9:40:36 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 9:07:21 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 8:11:18 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 7:48:21 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 7:38:38 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 4:14:31 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 3:33:40 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:59:36 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:56:42 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 10:50:01 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 12:30:35 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 12:03:27 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 11:33:28 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 10:40:48 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 9:50:02 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 9:45:56 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 7:29:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 6:38:09 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 5:07:15 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:41:22 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:40:14 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:31:28 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:24:38 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 2:29:02 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 2:25:34 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 1:40:22 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 12:14:30 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 12:05:02 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 11:52:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 10:34:20 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:54:20 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:12:54 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:08:43 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 7:03:13 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 7:00:27 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 2:39:55 PM UTC-5, B.H. wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 12:44:04 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, February 25, 2023 at 11:15:19 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ...the bot shot down my post again, but I thought to copy it before I posted it, so I can still paste it below:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just had a totally great idea just now! I was reflecting on the fact that I recently devise two very excellent STEM-based ideas for figuring out how to predict the stock market. I also have devised some great STEM-based ideas for how to communicate well, especially in writing...that project of devising more such ideas is ongoing.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Then, it occurred to me, based on some of my notes about my recent chess games: I could get into using STEM ideas to analyze and especially improve my performance at chess and running.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I decided to go back to Deep Run Park to start doing at least a little bit of running, now without music, starting tomorrow. I will still walk at the mall, because I don't find walking at DRP to be relaxing given all the weird people who show up there. Anyway, that is my new plan for what to do with my time now...I have been feeling fine, did well today, and felt less restricted and more "able to not have to be 'calming down' at night to feel OK," than I had felt in the past. The bot choking affected me only minimally, my mood was still much better than it had been in the 2 weeks preceding.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, that is my update for now. I feel a little unhappy that I am probably going to be known only as a writer, and not a science publisher, but think that is the right decision for me. I will get credit for writing, and I might branch into "persuasive/quasi-political non-fiction," as opposed to "here-you-go-America-free-service" non-fiction, as I was sort of thinking of doing at first. I really doubt I will change my mind, the decision, which seems quite right, is still just slowly sinking in....I am very likely to be a writer, full-time, and pour my STEM ideas into that, not any "sharing of secret family-enabling math ideas."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I will get more used to the idea and enthusiastic about it after it has been sinking in for a few days or weeks.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > After reviewing my job applications again, I am ready to say that I'm cautiously optimistic that I will get a job. I am not sure, but I am eagerly anticipating hearing back from one or more of the employers that I applied to in this next upcoming week.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Today, I'm going to do my usual things--not really start in until 2, although it's kind of boring to just do nothing for so many hours when I keep waking up at around 10 or so...I woke up in the middle of the night last night with a very fast heart rate, but it settled down and was fine, it's probably related to past bot conditioning attempts, and my cardio is good enough that I will be fine I'm sure.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm going to do my run, and start investigating "performance enhancement science" ideas...I'm pretty sure I will be the most competitive person in the world at that, as well as at, in general, physics, computer science, mathematics, statistics, communication, and writing. Hopefully I will get my chess game and exercise abilities in top-notch shape, too!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I believe I get it...I understand something...anyway, I decided to skip running for today after all, and focus on other "research-related activities."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I will do great, and my plans at this point haven't really changed.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A quick comment about a new understanding I have of my CIA opponents: They think that their attention to detail, thoroughness in planning, and very aggressive engineering efforts will, once demonstrated, somehow "break my morale" because (they think) "I am immoral" because "I am mentally ill and not Christian," and I do not acknowledge them as being above me in any way morally--for sure, given how they act. Basically, they have been continually baffled by how their aggressive demonstrations have led to me absorbing and reverse engineering a lot of their most valued secret technologies, including ones that I find knowledge of to be extremely useful to me and that I do not wish to repeat, even though I could since it is not my disclosure of classified information (is it classified?) that is being readily passed to unauthorized persons, that is what they are doing. The compartment of the CIA that is supervising in a way what is happening is apparently very much unaware of some of the secret technologies I have learned about, simply by spectating and watching their absurd, inappropriate theatrics.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just felt like saying that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > In short, it seems like almost nothing will stop the CIA from illegally leaking many of their most valuable classified secrets to me, rather frequently, without my consent or permission. I am being very unusually educated, and I did not ask to be.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Another thing I realized about Richard Darkins' comment: If people in the US are familiar with me and Biden's attacks on me, then if they really think that Biden is going to succeed at continuing to bother me, given how many times he has lied and how I have been perfectly honest and the fact that honesty is a trait and the five-factor model is established science, then such people clearly do not understand or do not accept the science of the five-factor model.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I learned a lot more important and interesting things today.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My updates list of activities in the future is now:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - publishing writing (fiction and maybe non-fiction)--no STEM or writing code at all
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - investing, based on scientific principles and not computer algorithms
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - day job (I might not reveal where I would be moving or what industry it is, given the levels of harassment and friendliness around here)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - boxing (I think it is a good idea for me to pursue a sport in my free time, not just exercise)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - continuing private science research that I will not share to fuel my other endeavors
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I *think* I will still be able to Africa, probably in a number of years rather than right away. You will note, I am avoiding things that are unfairly "access denied" activities for minority people and others who face discrimination. My plans are perfectly ethical and benevolent. I will persist in my efforts to help Africa, and also likely to help out in whatever community I am able to settle in comfortably.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On a personal and psychological note: As I noted, I recently became aware that a lot of things can be addicting. I've done a good, perfect-track-record job of stopping watching adult videos and stopping listening to modern music on purpose, cold turkey. Today, I noticed that I was feeling a little bit different and more absorbed in my own thinking, partly in a good way, but I think it is because I have been doing too many gaming activities, especially playing "Space Trader Merchant Marine," which is actually a really fun game--I beat the whole 5-level campaign part of the game, and today, I finished the first two "challenge" sections of the game...I think there are three sections of the challenge thing total. Anyway, I think I'm spending too much time on gaming, and I need to take a break. I said it was for therapeutic reasons, and I don't want to over-do it. I am also going to not play chess for a while. I didn't play today, but I was playing lots of games in the past few days before that...in the future, I will probably limit my chess activity to weekends. I'll probably still play a lot of games, but just in a few segments. I had been playing games with 10 minutes per side, and I was doing it for practice. I got tired quickly in many cases.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Thus, I have decided to stop all gaming activities for the next 3 days. In four days, I'll evaluate and see if I want to start up again, or if I'm doing fine without it. I might eventually finish the last challenge thing in STMM, but I don't want to mess up my health, particularly at a sensitive time like this for me, when I'm still being assaulted by bots sometimes, even choked at night, with the full and extremely inappropriate support of Congress.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I know what I'm going to be working on for the next few days also. I'm planning out what to do while I wait to hear back regarding my job search. I applied to about 10 jobs, and I decided that I won't apply to more jobs...I believe I'm qualified, and there shouldn't be any reason why I wouldn't hear back from the employers even just having applied to 10 jobs.. If my "email interview" rate is less than 10%, something is wrong anyway.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK...I'm done with everything I was going to do tonight, really. I have a little bit more food to eat, I'm going to try to relax and feel good, hopefully I'll get a good night of sleep without bot interruptions, and I am looking forward to having a peaceful day tomorrow...maybe I'll get a phone interview request since it's Monday, we'll see! I am trying to be optimistic and good-natured.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Some sort of random thoughts: I have started to feel as though I do not like the websites youtube.com or cnn.com visually. I wonder if that is a psychological thing, since I don't use YouTube for modern music any more. I sort of don't like logging in to YouTube sometimes, just because I don't want to have to look at the web design of that website.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I have a pleasant enough day planned for tomorrow. I have decided that I will not be traveling anywhere far until I can get a job. My only work task tomorrow is going to be working on a STEM-based art, writing, and communication idea tomorrow...it should be interesting, even though I really only have an hour set aside for that work, and no time set aside for any other work. (I'll probably have to stock up on groceries again tomorrow.)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It might be a challenge to find things to do until 2 p.m. when I wake up, since I'm not doing any gaming activities for 3 days. Maybe I should try to think of something to do if I wake up at around 10 or 11, which I probably will. I would want to do something relaxing and low-stress...hmmmm...I don't think I should get involved in doing anything on the internet, and I don't really feel like reading...Shift is a fine novel and I'm some number of chapters into it, but I don't want to keep reading it right now.. No gaming, so that basically rules out everything on the computer other than typing, since I said no internet. Hmmm...maybe I could drive somewhere, but I don't want to over do the trips to the mall for walking, 1 or 2 a day seems to be enough. Also, my typical thing to do for now is sort of "act like I haven't woken up until 2" since I am trying to be nice to myself for sleeping better and having woken up early, so I have been typically not eating or showering until 2. I don't think I want to exercise in the mornings....what shall I do? I already told Rosey that I am going to try to space out my visits with her to be only about once every two weeks, which she seemed to approve of, along with my other (perfectly legal to make) disclosures about IC/military technology to her that may help her understand household life better. AFAIK, Rosey understands a lot of English quite well...I think she has some ability to learn words from reading emotional cues, I don't think she understands every single thing I say, but I sort of think she knows how to "prioritize her attention" based on tone-of-voice cues, and I bet she can kind of tell if I'm just saying some sort of "generic 'good girl! what a good puppy!'" kind of thing, and when I'm saying something more content-heavy that she should try to parse the words of. That is just my guess though.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I also do not want to try to watch any TV shows. I think what I should do is some sort of "fun, easy, relaxing, psychological health activity"...something I can just type about and not get too "new STEM heavy" with, but just some sort of simple enough prompt-based idea for thinking of something to say about myself and the interactions I've had in some way that could maybe help my psychological health, particularly in terms of decreasing stress and anxiety and "ghost feelings of upsetness" that I can't explain. That is probably what I will do tomorrow...I'll probably try to design a prompt for that tonight and write it down on my computer, and then consider doing that tomorrow early on if I'm up early.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Hopefully I can think of something sort of mildly original and different from the usual psych activities I have done in the past.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Yo, I just have to let you know right now...the truth is, I thought of the 'Calculus Man' joke before anyone else, it was my idea. Everything else? It was exchanged for that joke by the creators of Superman. I'll show myself out now."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Something occurred to me this evening...probably, Sasha Burkhoff, whose names sounds like it was selected by her parents to sound like "the perfect name for a well-respected cryptologist," and thus a possible prospect as as NSA recruit as a mentally healthy student who had attended TJHSST in Virginia, had her brain-tumor-caused murder orchestrated initially by pro-life activists. According to my analysis, there is no other reason or group who would do it. I never actually spoke with Sasha, just saw and much later thought to recall a look she gave me when I think she had been diagnosed by the brain tumor, but I didn't have a strong emotional reaction, not that I was unkind or inappropriate about it in any way, but my sense of it is, she sounds like a target of pro-life religious extremists who didn't like TJHSST in general, didn't feel it was worth to murder me--they surely faced counter-attacks, probably including lethal ones, for their actions--since I was set up to be tortured as a math slave for years, and they could only pick out one student to kill to send a message about the NSA and the types of extremist fighters whom they might have felt would work there...in theory...so my sense of it is, even if she was a religious Christian and supported pro-life positions, she might have been targeted for not being "tough enough" on pro-choicer's, like my grandmother, who was kind to me although I am a liberal atheist...she even tried to not speak to me too much when I was physically present in the house, apparently that doesn't suffice for the extremists. Anyway, it is also certainly possible that Sasha was actively pro-choice. I think my theory is right. Relatedly, probably, Heath Ledger was murdered over some sort of political cause he had supported in a movie before The Dark Knight...I don't know what that would be, but my guess is, judging from Julia Stiles's comments about Ledger and Chrissy Teigen, who emotionally abused and harassed a gay man, according to what I read, he probably supported gay rights much more than actresses like Maggie Gylenhall and Julia Stiles felt comfortable...probably more "pro-choice, that's it, I just say I'm liberal" types.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, I realized that Dr. Kudurogianis was not evil...he is also facing threats, I'm sure, and did the amount of helpful psychiatric work that he felt he would be able to do safely...I think he omitted some "emotional distress" and "employment/socialization" issues due to reasons I would not understand, perhaps related to his safety or something else. I think it is fairly clear that the psychiatric treatment that he did helped me a lot...if I become suspicious that he was actually evil once again, based on me having noticed some detail that I hadn't seen before, I will probably be sure to post my latest theory about that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Great news for people who are on my side! I spent this morning beginning and planning out further work on a "STEM-based system for recovering psychologically from harassment attacks," so that I can use some of my best secret ideas to identify cognitive issues I may be having, including with "inclinations to snap at other angrily," feeling restricted from doing certain things for no good reason, not caring enough and feeling callous about people whom I'm trying to care about and ought to care about, and other issues, and use my competitively excellent ideas to work on "fixing the damage to my mind muscles/processes" so that I can "exercise those muscles" healthily and without pain so that I can get them to be stronger and working properly, as they were in the past and should be for my health and sense of identity/self-concept. Also good news: I think that given local residents' plots to sabotage me psychologically for whatever weird reason, this announcement will demoralize them, and my announcement that it will demoralize them will likely vex them if they want to start up more strange "Wile E. Coyote schemes" to "trick and deceive and psychologically 'hex'" me to feel or perform in a way that is not my best. I.e., I think they will start to realize that their weird and freaky endeavors to mess with me are not a good investment of their time, and they'll sense the regret and unhappiness they will feel later when they see that it didn't work and was all just a frankly pathetic waste of their time, and their movement to bother me will lose enthusiasm.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, my psychology activity for this morning was a big success! I have planned some more work on it to do tomorrow, during my main hours of activity during the day, after 2 p.m.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A comment about this ordeal: I note that there were *very many* people who, in this crisis situation for me, were essentially required to do enough of their part to "give me the password" to get out of trouble. A lot of people refused, in some cases citing right-wing extremist ideology, and in other cases citing threats to them and their families. The thing about the latter situation is, basically, a lot of people "passed the burden" to my family leading to at least two relatives dying, very likely murdered by the CIA, while the other people "wanted to play it safe." I.e., by not doing their jobs, they aggressively and inappropriately passed the "lack of safety burden" from their families to mine, causing damage. Thus, the "right to be outraged and to retaliate" lies with the people who are in my family who are unethical, not with them. Basically, the JACM, Cornell, and Cambridge University in Britain, murdered my grandmother and my uncle, citing, in a sense ,a desire to be safe by virtue of having a good, sustained relationship with political terrorists and mobsters in the CIA, who illegally kill innocent people to seek to pursue their political will.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said "people in my family who are ethical," that's an inserted typo.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Oh, Publix just started discriminating against me today...how original and surprising. I CuRrEnTlY have a very thick skin about this sort of thing, and it doesn't bother me or affect me that much...I will keep shopping there for now while I still live in this dumb area. It's just, "Say goodbye to all your appealing future career possibilities, Publix employees! You don't even know what you are doing professionally, at all, and the double entendre in this sentence is intended!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Regarding my job search...I can see 9 of the jobs I applied to on the panel on the job applications website; the region I applied to is in a different time zone in the USA. I am very qualified, and I applied last Wednesday. I hope I am not being locked out by another tiresome political attack on me for no reason, one that would have pointed at me no matter what I said or did, simply because I am a mentally atheist. Anyway, I only heard back from one employer so far, and they said no to my application. Hopefully I will hear more from the other employers within the next few days...how thoroughly did Donald Trump and his lieutenants seize control of the US job market??! I hope I won't wind up just sitting here, exerting political power by typing out things on Usenet, using new STEM ideas that I have that are under development that bad guys wouldn't understand because they are not able to "crack the code" of the English language! I would really prefer to be an employed private citizen, not an ongoing law-abiding anti-US-government antagonist using cutting edge STEM capabilities to trip up US political agendas pretty much every day! Gosh, I wish I could stop feeling compelled to mess with with the USA's secretly right-wing extremist, anti-Semitic, anti-Muslim, anti-atheist government for a week or two!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The US Democratic Party has never before been forced to negotiate a full, unconditional "political surrender" to anyone, have they? Well, if I'm still here in a couple months, you'll all get to find out that feels. Imagine an America with *NO LIBERALISM WHATSOEVER.* Are you excited to live in that world? Is that what you are voting for by denying my rights, or would you like to delude yourselves and side with Biden? Indeed, I *couldn't* convince the Democrats to stop hurting or be reasonable...I can't educate them on how to be smart and rational, all I can do is destroy everything everything they ever fought for, for me because I like me and I think my life and rights matter, and then keep attacking everyone, ruining everything they've gotten and fought for over the years, until they have nothing left and realize how dumb they were.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Would you be gentler in some way if I did what you did to me to one of you? No! You are doing things to me, and I haven't committed *one* crime against any of you or any of your backers. If I had eagerly served you and gotten nothing in returned, you would have tried to Auschwitz me anyway, and would not have backed no matter what. Get ready to see where this path with leads, I'm now apparently about to be your tour guide to a whole new America that you will not recognize and not like, because it will have been politically completely re-shaped by me with cutting edge science ideas, unless I am able to not face discrimination during my job search. How much is it worth to you? Did you, "everything?" Hint: Yes, and you're right! That's what it will cost. You're already paying a large percentage of the total possible cost, do you want to increase that or decrease that?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Basically, my failure was, I thought the US leaders were self-interested and smart.. I thought they would be smart enough and not crazy, and would let me have my rights and let me go. I guess they are not that smart, and insist on being pummeled some more. Either that, or I'm gong to be getting interviewed sometime this week that's for sure.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Basically, at this point, if you have been a bad guy linked to the team of people who are homicidally stalking me, if you are not done with me by the end of this week and I am not actively interviewing for jobs, you will soon be done enjoying any benefits of American liberalism, period. I have the power to do that, no one else does. Did you miss what happened to Build Back Better, abortion rights, the US military's power, Biden's approval ratings, Democratic control of Congress, and even Donald Trump being used as a threat or having a viable candidacy, due to my use of my STEM powers and the US government's failure to heed my protest on behalf of my basic Constitutional rights? In that case, I even *told you fools* *exactly* what I was doing, STEM-wise. Next time, it will be a different set of excellent capabilities, and I will not tell you a think about what I'm doing, it will devastate Democrats politically, you won't be able to guess what I'm doing with algorithms or anything else, and it will all be perfectly legitimate and in accordance with the rules. Now let me go or face the consequences!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I did a great job on my STEM research task today...things are coming along extremely well, and my work is even more fun than usual. I have more such work to do tomorrow.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Regarding the conflict: To say it again another way: The clear and repeated and persistent, un-American argument of my opponents who think I should be caged and not allowed to socialize, date, or have a job, is: "We have every right to ignore the separation of church and state and freedom of religion in the US Constitution, because we would prefer to view atheists as cattle, with worthless lives, whom the government has the right to slaughter or try to slaughter, without any respect for their rights or feelings, at any time that we choose, with no regard for any laws. We may also slaughter people like cattle that we see as 'failing to dehumanize atheists' and being too friendly with them." That is the kind of extremist you've signed up to support if you're backing Biden and his cronies. You don't want to go there, it's roughly the same thing as anti-Semitism.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A couple of developments:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 1 - It looks like the mall has changed its hours, and now it closes at 7 p.m. I don't think it used to...I wonder if the Christian church that meets in two of the store-type areas had something to do with the change, to make a statement about me?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 2 - It occurred to me this evening that some time ago, someone credible hinted to me that I was likely being considered for the position of Secretary of Defense some time ago. I might have been the youngest one if my various promotions and career achievements hadn't been sabotaged! It is probably a good idea for me to mention this at this time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A dramatic reflection on my recent learning endeavors:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Ze codes, Mr. Vite. Ze codes! Now you see...velcome to schizophrenia, ze codes, zey make you genius!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I seem to be mostly out of jokes though. Remember when I said--rapped, rather:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "If I say things are like things and express opinion
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Each booty babe will fail to not become my minion"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ...remember when that seemed like it was going to be true?? What happened????!! All those comedic rap songs, and all I got was...uh...deniably video messaged by Zara Larsson and then blocked. Step up to the plate, yo! You only live once, and there's only one me. My arrogance, like so much else, knows no bounds...just as it is with my physics knowledge, I'm one of a kind! Now, in a space-time continuum sense, it is all women in the USA who are desperate, deep down, maybe unconsciously, to meet me, and not the other way around! Again, it's like Linkin Park always envisioned for me: "So [he's] waitin' until the upper hand is [his]....". Don't disrespect the prophecy, yo!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Would that I could calibrate my jokes to be funnier, for the perfect audience...forsooth.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (Yes, this again.)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, I do not actually know if Zara Larsson is a Nazi who supports murdering me for being an atheist. I wrote above assuming she was not.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, regarding the Richard Dawkins Tweet: Here is a really good idea; I would think that every single US citizen who is currently residing in the US, has heard of me or met me and heard what happened to me, is alive and feeling well, and never supported right-wing extremism, and didn't get a chance to get in touch when I demanded to be contacted between Sept 2020 and the present, ought to send me an email, at least wishing me well, maybe offering to see if there is anything such a person could do to help me, given that I will have basically just gotten out of a de facto American (??!) concentration camp.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The obvious question about why any such person who would read this and then not get in touch with me is, "Why not?," and it would tend to suggest that such a person, given my insistence and biography and status as a virtuous bipolar American atheist, would either feel "extremely threatened by a still-tyrannical US government," or, more likely, would be a "radicalized right-wing extremist residing in America who supports ethnic cleanings operations, against the mentally ill, against atheists, and against black people residing in Africa." Otherwise, why wouldn't such a person at least send a quick email checking it? It would seem to suggest some sort of "mass radicalization epidemic" that hit the USA, that would have hit the people who refused to contact me, and that there is indeed, as Fox News suggested when speaking of a "silent majority," that a very large number of people in the USA have apparently converted to fascism. Otherwise, I would receive at least a quick "glad you're feeling better' email for sure, from everyone who had heard of me, given that I would be like Anne Frank if she had managed to just finish escaping from a Nazi concentration camp...surely all of the people who wished her well and didn't support her being tortured and murdered by Nazis would want to send her an email congratulating her on her escape and wishing her well? There could be no other explanation, of course.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK, so I am going to go to bed soon. I am pleased that, looking at the text I've written and the lack of any coherent response to it or accusation from government officials or anyone else with authority, it is clear that it has been clear, for months now, that I am totally and 100% a victim of right-wing extremists in government and beyond...I am not a bad guy and never deserved this. So that is good.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, my science projects are going well. I am feeling a little bit mildly restless at night--it is hard to tell how much of that is due to the wake-ups from the government-linked bad guys--but mostly I feel fine each day. Just bored, ready for things to change so that I can get out of here and have a real, normal life as I and other innocent people deserve to have. I am one of the smartest and most talented people in the world now, so in spite of my set backs, I am a fairly fortunate person in terms of talent and long-term (decades-type term) outcome...I'm sure I'll be doing great in my 40's, I'll just be a little bit older and past my prime physically. Mentally, I'll surely still be the best theorem prover in the world, and that will be the source of my talent, which I'll be sure to stockpile and keep to myself.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So...I am trying to think of ways to relax at night. I looked at the YouTube videos again, and in spite of my different viewing choices, they are all completely *useless*, the recommendations totally suck and it is unpleasant even looking at the thumbnails on the main page. Now that I'm avoiding Twitter due to discrimination, I am starting to feel like groups.google.com is the only site I ever want to visit, except for maybe checking my email accounts on Yahoo and Gmail, and also occasionally glancing at cnn.com, which is also a crap website, but I ought to know a few of the top headlines that are not being covered up at any given time. So yeah. I am finding writing in my offline files to be more productive and interesting than anything there is to do online. I like typing in my offline files and walking, and eating, and I wish I could socialize and date and maybe have sex. Other than that, I'm not all that limited...I can't do work for money yet, perhaps due to government limitations, but I can still exert more political and other power than anyone else in the world...I'll have all my latest ideas set up and ready to use soon, and I'll just type what I want to type on Usenet, and see how that goes. It should have an impact, and again, it won't be unethical or against the law....I'll be sure. So my "job," coming soon if I'm not released or employed, will be writing appropriate STEM-backed posts, in captivity, on the internet to continue to exert my political will on the world. I should be allowed to socialize and friends--I'm a perfectly nice and quite normal person, I follow the rules, don't do anything wrong, just file complaints about the epidemic of weirdos bothering me and never start fights, always do the right thing, never do any weird or creepy/strange things to other people like try to "scare them" or follow them around or harass them, always behave appropriately and like I should. Anyway, I'll see where this ends pretty soon I'm sure...the bad guys, I don't think, can take many more losses...I mean they can, but they really wouldn't look like they are even employed if they keep pushing with this, I don't get how such high-power leaders of the US, in such a competitive field, can be so completely stupid, irrational, nakedly and publicly pro-extremism and pro-terrorism, and able to still maintain approval ratings of about 30%. I admit, I'm quite stunned by that capability....how can such incompetent figure out a way to keep their jobs without ever doing them, how on earth do they do that? I'm not jealous and don't want to copy that, but the example is stunning and interesting in its own right, like Caligula's success as a Roman leader.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Once again, I am thinking some more about Richard Dawkins' Tweet. Liar drops R; maybe that means, Joe Biden drops Regency Mall, without the monolith, i.e., I will get hired based on the region I correctly applied to. If so, great! That will be excellent. My usual "Donkey Kong dance," not that I think mentally ill people should be considered apes, but I'm thinking of the "aggressive impactful stomping" of sorts, before big event relevant to me that might be sabotaged that may require a "vocally aggressive send-off to the immediate predecessor time" just before the full result is in, to pre-attack in case I've been "foiled again by a pinball-tilt wizard with no ethics or sense of 'gosh, that was too much, enough is enough,'" is basically contained above in some of the writing. I basically always do that, in this situation where I post a lot in public, right before I think that something big and important I'm working towards is about to possibly be sabotaged into not working right again, based on an initial "bad sign," which just be an incidental thing and nothing to worry about over all.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I'm thinking maybe I will get a job. I hope so. I'm going to turn the computer off pretty soon and get more fully ready to fall asleep.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, I am a little bit worried about: the guy with the bald head who used to also walk on Quioccasin Road who I think was mentally ill, Kristen, who sometimes walked on Quioccasin Road and seemed to have disappeared recently, and the guy that I saw who was black who seemed like he was mentally ill on Quioccasin, and the white guy who looked like he liked to wear military camouflage type of clothing and a hat whom I would see on Quioccasin road...there was also the black guy that I called "nodding head man" who used to bother me, he might have been mentally ill, and maybe I shouldn't blame him for having bothered me by nodding his fast when I was very much more sensitive and messed up due, I think, to trauma-related mental illness. Is anyone going to help them if they are still in trouble and not where they want to be in life yet? They looked like they were totally shunned by the local community and very under-supported, if they did indeed have mental health problems...probably they weren't even all identifying as atheists. I hope that my "monolith" will be their "monolith," too, i.e., that they will be able to get out of isolation, if they're in isolation in the Tuckahoe area and not already out of isolation.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A couple more comments:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Yeah I trained my "inner word-fighter persona" in melee combat with Ras al CVS. I stole the power to be extremely rude, with or without a reason of any sort.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - This morning, I noticed that my neck and shoulders felt a little weird and sort of sore, like it would feel comfortable to rest my head by tilting it to the right, like I was Stephen Hawking who was paralyzed and had his head looking like it was at an angle in his wheelchair, at least that was my perception...maybe it was not actually at much of an angle, checking the photos on Google briefly. It sounds like a nasty joke about me and atheists and highly competent STEM people, and I received a credible psych hint about the government-linked gesture doing this, suggesting that it is not a total surprise, perhaps, and a psych professional somewhere knew that a gesture of this nature would be done at some point, and maybe the perpetrator's psychological state and behavior are not necessarily hard to explain or predict, to an extent, at all. Yes, there is probably something psychological to be learned from my own initial explorations into basic amateur psychology...what did I reach for first, how is my "first-choice" lens to reach for characterized? Whatever. I'm mainly pivoting back to "easy psych ideas," just because my psych "research," amateur and not valuable/competitive or not, is mainly just to help me improve my own health for now, not to win any "innovative psychology research contests" or anything along those lines. I'm more interested in competing, vaguely speaking, at "applied math that I can use to get ahead at almost anything performance-related," in a variety of different contexts.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Remember: It is the lives of Nazis and other intolerant right-wing extremists that are worthless, not the lives of the people that they target and despise.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > youtube.com/watch?v=C9SiRNibD14&embeds_euri=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2F&source_ve_path=MjM4NTE&feature=emb_title
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yes, this video is sad. Science is a good thing--the means to power, health, safety, technological progress, and often prosperity.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, it is concerning that this woman from Africa is trying to like Newton's scientific achievements with colonization. There is no evidence that science is linked to discrimination or exploitation of minority groups or people outside of the US.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A concern is that many people would argue that people who want to support colonizing or otherwise support exploiting Africa ought to be killed, i.e., if it is not illegal in your country to kill someone who wants to support fascism or slavery-like activities, then it would not be a bad idea to kill that person, like killing a Confederate or Nazi soldier in battle; the lives of confirmed fascists are worthless, and within the constraints of US law in America, ought to be either imprisoned, killed, or otherwise removed from relevance and ideally prosperity, as soon as possible. That goes for anyone who wants to eliminate some or all people from a particular legitimate background as though they had no rights, whether the background is ethnic, religious, or something else not related to "being an evil predatory fascist."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I am hoping that she does not mean that she thinks that pro-science people should be killed. Sadly, if she adopted such a position and pushed for it, she would put herself into a very bad category. I am speaking about this because I believe that people in Africa, who may have been denied some Western educational benefits, deserve more of a chance to turn around mistaken behavior and not support hurting pro-science people, including science-interested students in school who might not thrive without education...although that is different from wanting "pro-science people killed," and she didn't say that she wanted that, I am just worried about the claimed connection between colonialism and science.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My point is that people who support murder and fascism become, after a certain possible grace period of controversial length, people with worthless lives. Most people who fought for Naziism in WW2 ought not be given a chance to "tell everyone they're sorry and repent," that's good enough. There are some fascists from different parts of history that should not be allowed out of jail for 500 years. I still oppose the death penalty avidly, but any person who converts to fascism, while not losing his or her rights as a possibly accused criminal person or not, loses the "desirability of their existence," although it might be illegal to kill them without a trial.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So my point is, do not ever join forces with fascists, no matter what opinions you may have about people from backgrounds other than your own--you may champion your beliefs and backgrounds, but never support the denial of rights or the denial of desirability of other people being alive, unless such people are fascists, i.e., people who themselves deny the desirability of being alive to others over a mere beliefs-based disagreement that does involve calling for the deaths of innocent, "maybe just wrong" people, as opposed to true fascists.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said, "that's not good enough.."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Someone outside signaled me to "see Bill Gates," so I did.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > What is he saying? "PW aim [is getting close with] the world" ? What, now for the first time? Is this some sort of reverse psychology trick?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Why didn't Microsoft offer to hire me, since it understood my talent all along?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My aim is to have my own life, withhold my STEM talents as punishment for the "slavery and extraction" initiative that political terrorists backed, presumably because they didn't want me to get big at DOD because criminals in STEM business, like Zuckerberg and possibly also Gates--I don't know--might fear my rules-based leadership and top-notch talent at STEM. I also want to help Africa. Is there some sort of claim that I have been inconsistent in anything I said?? Is it claimed that my chemistry disclosure, related to BQP = P and disease cures, somehow does *not* cure cancer?? Please, check with an expert who still trusts you, if you can find one! I am definitely no longer "crank" by any measure, and I never was one, just somewhat ignorant about classical mechanics and other areas of physics--I had been quite behind on studying, now I am not--I don't have a deep understanding of relativity, general or special, but I get the very basics of QM, and I understand classical mechanics well.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Bill Gates must not smear me, or risk being seen as "just another big-money-man cheater who fought his way to the top, became 'a king of having money,' and added no value to the world," just as the excellent researcher and publisher CS Christos Papadimitriou seems to have predicted, sort of.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I *will* help Africa if I can make the money. Why wouldn't I? Is it claimed that I cannot, that I don't have the will to spend money on such things? Does Gates actually believe that a condition for my freedom, as a brilliant, totally innocent atheist who is much better at math, CS, and engineering than he is, even as a top-ranked business leader, is that I must "serve the world" with my STEM talents, publishing free "naked photos of all the things that make me powerful," so that he can make money from them and not I? I've given more than enough free STEM gifts to the world, it is time for me to be *compensated* for my work, and also, well past time for me to be liberated--unlike Gates, I've never been credibly accused of committing a serious crime.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe Gates is questioning why I have lost interest in STEM. Oh, is he pretending that he doesn't know a certain fact about computers, or does he actually not know?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, if Gates is not a fascist or homicidal criminal at least, I *demand* his full support for my release.. He should have offered to buy my IP, but not being a likely candidate for being ethical, he probably would never do that. I have nothing to fear from a "lacking Bill Gates like" as long as I do not work as a STEM worker in the STEM industry; his "like" is irrelevant in my new chosen field.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A question about the local community:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Are most citizens in the Tuckahoe area *actually* claiming that they "don't really have free speech rights or the right to peaceably assemble near me," or is that another fake-out attempt? If they believe that, do they accept that, and is their defense against further curtailments against their rights, due to their crimes, that "no one has the capability to do anything to us, so we're just going to keep doing our way?" I think that attitude will not get a good outcome; no one wants to tell you how certain techniques for dealing with "right-wing bad guy daredevils" are sometimes used to fight back.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Whatever that other post says on my thread, I am not reading it.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, the Little League tragedy of today is, Publix once again was deliberately out of YoCrunch (they claimed credit for it yesterday). Clearly, there is only one question about this situation: Will I, or will I not, get into volunteer "Retail Rap" under the rapper name, "Cashier Fatherf---er For Fun," and how many cashier careers will I mercilessly ruin with the awesome power of the pen?? IS there a limit to how much damage I can enjoy myself while sustaining it and waiting for whatever to happen? Who knew hurting bad-guy people's lives could be so fun???
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yo, I gotta start right there, I can't just leave that hanging, yo....
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > UNTITLED RAP
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > by Cashier Fatherf---er For Fun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yo, my name is Manheim, they think they're Julia Right
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A Stiles motherpredecessor, ring it up as a fight, yo...
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I can't delete losers as fast as I shop, but
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I would compete to get losers' heads on a justice chopping block
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > You know, I am an artist--my words are OK--because, I
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Fight relentlessly to just prove I'm still not gay, because I
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Am gay deep down, unless it's a statement to show, that
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm not intimidated by deletions of Yo-
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Crunch, um, you knew that was coming 'cause I rap about me
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I channel adrenaline and I charge a fee, you see
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The metaphorical gun flash but you think there's no gun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > And yeah, it's just a metaphor, I smoked you for fun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > [begin snare]
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm not Obama--I just snort Confederates when stuck on an island
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > If I write aggressive raps and die will they scream, "Oh, why, man??!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Does anyone miss anyone without a new rap atmosphere?--no.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I thought I proved to them my strength is from being non-sex-queer, though.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quirky adrenaline, you'll never trace it down, guys
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I spurt technologies, and you lose blood like dead flies
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > You sign up for death and more death and I'm totally blameless
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I thought He'd cancel you, but everyone's shameless.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > [guitar solo]
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I need an outro that returns to the central
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Theme of my rap which is that you are all no-go's
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I use that word and not the p-slur--I'm perfect
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Still bag the groceries miss, your life is now worthless.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > That's my rap song! What do you think? I feel comfortable asserting that viciously insulting intransigent law breaker cashiers is not harassment or stalking, as long as I don't name names or say anything directly in public. I have a right to make political speech, in the form of art, whether your like it or not. A lot of people are saying that they hate me for stupid reasons, why not get more insulting, see if they like it more? Maybe some professional rapper will come out and say how much they hate me too, I'll be sure to quiver. Also, I'm still under duress, as anyone can see! The hate-fueled nightmare is supposed to never end according to them, I don't have to persuade you, if you don't know how to think, it's your graves, Confederacy punks! Fascists always lose! Don't delude yourselves about exactly what you are! Note, retail work is fine, if you do it WITHOUT trying to intimidate, harass, gaslight, or discriminate against people. Let's see how juiced up Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren will get this time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > That was fun. Now on to other things.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yeah that's right I was actually mean, once. What!!!!!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > No I am not going to publish any new STEM ideas to help the military or other goons. I'm immune to all manipulative tricks, I'm done outputting STEM, forever, you're on your own, losers.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm starting to worry that Biden shut down my job search in another state, too. The job was one I was extremely qualified for, and I still haven't heard anything positive from any of the jobs I applied to.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So...do all geographic regions in the USA support the idea that Biden is completely control of law-abiding, intelligent religious minorities' members being able to get a job, literally anywhere? Can Biden shut down good career moves for any atheist in the USA? I suspect that the answer is yes, and no one will talk about it...I hope something really nasty and permanent happens to the people who are making sleazy deals of this nature, in clear support of anti-atheist fascism.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway...I don't know what to do next, I have fought and worked as hard as almost anyone ever could, but just as Einstein would have trouble getting out of a concentration camp if he had stayed in Germany for too long, all my talents and work and digging deep, and really exerting myself to try to look out for myself and exercise my legal rights and get a good job have thwarted by vastly populated legions, sadly, of American right-wing extremists. They are not being challenged enough, they have largely taken over the economy of the country, and contrary to my initial belief, it looks like they do not merely control STEM and retail.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > FYI, I am not saying it is a Jewish conspiracy, in case someone thinks that I sound like some sort of bad guy who is claiming that "Jews are trying to control everything." It is not Jewish people, it is American political crooks. WHEN will they cut this out? It has been almost 12 years, I tried asking nicely and appealing to reason and the evidence and my innocence, I tried demonstrations of my STEM talent and was just smeared (e.g., with the Hodge Conjecture, my logic result, the twin prime conjecture, etc.), I finally resorted to aggressively attacking the fascist leaders who are perpetrating this...what am I supposed to do? What is any person in my position, being innocent and just mentally ill and an atheist, supposed to do to get away from extra-judicial assaults and "containment efforts" made against by government-employed fascists?? Someone is supposed to fix this! I could warn of the consequences--some of them have already been faced--but I am growing tired of that. Don't try to convert the USA to a racist dictatorship, that is not good for anyone. Leave me alone and let me work!!! Fascists deserve death, not liberals!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just realized something: The government still thinks it's going to use "stress" and "psychological manipulation" to manipulate my mood and feelings, and put me in great distress--probably with a few more "false hope" things, then "choking incidents," then "weird and confusing signals that seem to be about something important...but what are they really saying?", and try to manipulate me into changing my mind into publishing more STEM.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > In the past, I definitely changed my mind about publishing differential equations--I thought it would help, and it probably did...it probably ended the US's ability to be a navy and air force superpower, basically permanently, unless more help would be provided by me.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I do not share things at random. I try to do what is in my interests, whether I'm stressed out and desperate (I probably won't be in the near future at all) or not. I have done a really good job on working on being able to relax. I AM NOT GOING TO PUBLISH ANY MORE STEM. I made sure, after I changed my mind on diff eq publication, to also change my mind and "declare law-abiding war on the US Department of Defense," and I did that, and I won...I tossed them a breakable code using BPP = P, and they can use it, but it doesn't matter--all their secret things were lost to their adversaries via flight surveillance and cryptology during the no-codes phase.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I won the war on DOD, they just want to deny it, and now shower THEMSELVES with false hope and optimism, thinking that they are "such great Christian guys, of COURSE they'll get it back, the US NEVER loses like this," precisely because the US has never been this morally wrong-headed or right-wing and extremist before; the US declared war on terrorism in 2001, and thus itself in the near future--today.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I WILL NEVER PUBLISH MORE STEM TO HELP THE GOVERNMENT FOR ANY OTHER REASON. It is over, I am keeping it to myself to fuel other endeavors, I am *never* going to try to help *anyone*, other than my own children, with STEM sharing or explanation efforts, EVER AGAIN.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe that will clarify some things.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My day today was fairly pleasant. I had to go to Food Lion to get YoCrunch because Publix still wouldn't stock it...whatever. I will probably write more "rather absurd rap songs" to exercise my sense of humor, since I can't even talk right now, but I'll probably be more light-hearted and less mean in the future.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Somewhat disappointingly, my schedule for my day tomorrow is basically exactly the same as my schedule for today. I worked for more than an hour on my math research task today, which was great and yielded some good ideas. I am still continuing the same research tomorrow, and I might do it for at most 2 more days before I move on. I am only doing real work for 1-2 hours a day right now, and I'm still on my gaming break. I might stay on that, unless I get more headaches soon.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I am starting to think that the end of this will have nothing to do with getting the job I was trying to get from the job search. Do I have to wait for the government to relent? What about waiting for the wildly nutty local citizens to relent? I don't see what they are thinking or afraid of or doing, why are they *all* *still* siding with fascist ideologies, do they think they will get some sort of warmth and protection from that? That is not a good move, side with the truth, good values, patriotism, the US Constitution, and me, not code-talking terrorist linked insider threat bad guys who "have a job in the government." I had a job in the government, let me tell you, that helps you 0% with law enforcement, whether you mention it or not, if you get arrested or TDO'd (I have never been arrested, but I have been TDO'd, twice by police, sometimes even improperly, shortly after quitting jobs as an NSA contractor...it changes nothing, which is how it is supposed to work). I.e., even if you think you have power from a government position and try to abuse it, the police will just ignore that. It's just a job, it's not a magical "becoming a king or queen" ceremony, you really shouldn't see government employees as "larger than life," they're mostly very inefficient and ineffective at getting things done at the office.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So anyway...I am trying to be calm, since it's getting late. I am trying to relax and not vent any more angry feelings or "creative interpretations for debate/persuasion/etc." about this nonsense.. I wonder what it will take for me to be spoken to again? I don't know. I might take a break from all work pretty soon, but then I wouldn't know what to do with all my time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yeah, I wonder what the end of this will look like. Which will happen first? Will local residents come to their senses and stop backing fascists and code-talking liars? Will I get a job? Will someone from another state or another country write to me? Will the DOD write to me to apologize for their huge mistake/crime? Will the news run a story forcing a bad US political leader to resign, decreasing interest in this "project?" I don't know, but I've waited for over a decade for justice and access to my Constitutional rights!! What a farce, I don't know for sure what exactly these people are thinking.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I'm going to try to have a pleasant night.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, now that night-time is here, I note I would probably feel more relaxed if I typed something relaxing. Who knows why. I should be high-energy and full of comments and ideas and even a little bit of aggression during the day--I just remembered that I said I was going to stop being aggressive, but it is sometimes hard to remember all the different changes I wanted to make to improve my psych health, it's not that important that I stick to that, it is just important that I never publish STEM again.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I think the "monolith" is: Regency Mall drops Regency, i.e., when the local mall loses its administrative authority given to it on behalf of a monarch. What authority is that? What exactly can they do? I think Dawkins' subsequent comment, which came out to "clatter lordie," suggests that the Christian church there got investigated for extremism after my comment...I did see a little bit of evidence of that, some man inside one of their areas made a sort-of Nazi salute gesture at me, I mainly just ignored that, that sort of thing is pretty common around here.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe I should disclose more strange mall activity?...they keep sending groups of young men with one overweight chesty woman by to say things, the group today yelled "penis" when I looked at them, and the woman made eye contact with me and said something like "bye bye Kyle," which is the first name of a male patient at Dominion Hospital that I went to see Dr. Steg in 2001. Maybe it helps to repeat these things, I don't know. I heard some other man say "bye Felicia" loudly a while ago, a number of days ago, at the mall. I heard a woman who looked pretty and might have been Hispanic talking on the phone, near the "escape rooms" thing with her group of friends, and I heard her say, "I have a reservation" over the phone, perhaps she was from out of town.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Last time with the overweight chesty woman, the code was something like "a cost" then "most sag" and then the code had like "two sniffles" after that, I don't know what they were trying to say. Whatever, I don't get the point or message of what they're trying to do, it sounds unfriendly. I saw a group of teenagers coming by, and they made some sort of like aggressive gesture while looking at me, like, "WHAT?!", and I didn't pay that much attention to them.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > There was a large group of people singing in the Christian church area a few days ago. Today, a black man in a Harvard sweatshirt came out of the bottom of the elevator, holding a staff or stick or whatever. Today, I saw a security guy on one of those electronic rolling segue thing, making some sort of gesture. I saw a guy like that working for security before; he did that when I first started walking there, then the next a different security guy started quickly shaking his head at me, then I complained, then there were two security workers sitting at a desk, and one of them sort of "put their hands up," a lot like one of the female workers at Food Lion did one time. I don't know the gang codes at all, I'm just posting to maybe help "drop the regency of Regency Mall," maybe it will work!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Actually, no, DOS, "roboticdeepthroatconditioning..mil" is not a good idea for a web-based app for your upcoming startup. Get a little more creative, there actually are some fascists out there who are even better at thinking and science than you.
> > > > > > > > > > > > Rap About Walking In the RVA Area, Etc.
> > > > > > > > > > > > by Broom Philip
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > I've got to find a place to walk every day
> > > > > > > > > > > > The FBI is like shut down, so criminals may
> > > > > > > > > > > > Do what they want to do whenever they want
> > > > > > > > > > > > Follow me through shopping malls, grocery stores, and Deep Run Park
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > So I am writing a rap to kill some time, you know
> > > > > > > > > > > > I see the anarchists have killed fighting crime, and so
> > > > > > > > > > > > My free time's spent on research food and health
> > > > > > > > > > > > While the world is acting like it's favored by stealth
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > They think the secret spies stalk their enemies better
> > > > > > > > > > > > If they can't see it, they think, it makes women wetter
> > > > > > > > > > > > The movie-like atmosphere of intriguing spy pirates
> > > > > > > > > > > > Is, they think, the beauty of all violence in silence
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > The rap is weak today 'cause it's just a drill
> > > > > > > > > > > > You'd rather have just me and not the FBI chill, but
> > > > > > > > > > > > Indeed you wanted Sin City but got Gotham instead
> > > > > > > > > > > > You think you're safest when your eyes are closed in bed
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > My self-expression requires no apology, now
> > > > > > > > > > > > They changed god to mysteriousness in their brand new theology, now
> > > > > > > > > > > > The Christian church no longer has its true savior
> > > > > > > > > > > > And, they think forgiveness green lights every behavior.
> > > > > > > > > > > Here is my latest prediction of how it will end: On March 14 or so, 18 days after Dawkins' Tweet, Biden has predicted in public in code that Vladimir Putin will be killed by a US-linked drone strike, and then Biden's approval ratings will go up and he'll look more likely to win the 2024 election. The truth is, though, the capabilities to be dominant, air-force-wise, over Russia have been removed for the US; they cannot possibly have the power to do that sort of assassination any more--no country has that kind of power any more, at least not over the top developed nations with the GDP to support "the standard air force." Perhaps the bad guys will finally drop me and admit assaulting me wasn't worth it, even taking morality out of the equation. *Hopefully* they will regain a sliver of their sanity.
> > > > > > > > > > Update regarding my job search: I think I did apply to the right region--a place that is not against, e.g., LGBTQ people--and I think that there are firms that would like to reach out to me. My guess is, some political group essentially made "huge threats" against the firms that seemed likely to communicate with me, and there is a "brief pause for a battle," that the employers will win. So far, none of the 10 or so firms I applied to have written back except one...I bet they will, and it will just take a while, due to political pressure, which one of the firms even says it does not value above equal opportunity, even in cases of stalking.
> > > > > > > > > A comment on an excerpt from the article linked to on Richard Dawkins' Twitter:
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > https://www.spectator.co.uk/article/who-really-discovered-dnas-structure/
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > "This is a story replete with competition, friction, misunderstanding and some sexism, but it lacks anything truly unethical, let alone criminal. Four men and one woman, none of whom was perfect ... "
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > What? "...it lacks anything truly unethical..." ??! How exactly can one claim that refusing to cite someone else's research contribution, particularly when there was a huge breakthrough with big incentivized possibilities on the table, not being cited is not unethical?? I believe they were truly paying attention, and got press and thus an opportunity to correct themselves...it is very unethical to fail to cite research contributions, unless it is an accident and, once this is pointed out, a full and profuse apology is made by the non-citers. Researchers, including me, very often do not get paid anything beyond, in the cases of Ph.D. professors, "acceptable satisfaction of publishing requirements" to keep their jobs--I don't know if there are raise calculations involved--and so it is very important to cite research and things that contribute to research whenever a publication is done. I try to do so even informally when, in the past, I published things on the internet.
> > > > > > > > I also watched the first three minutes of this:
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E3bLSePqCvc&feature=youtu.be
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Interestingly, I didn't know about natural selection before I was in middle school myself...it is interesting to think about different education curriculums in different countries. I think I got better at understanding it in 9th grade. Also, I was very interested in genetic algorithms in college...before I figured out how to actually solve the discrete logarithm problem, one of my early attempts was based on genetic algorithms.
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > One way to view the idea of evolution speed--since you might wonder, with respect to what metric or dimension are you defining speed, or change with time?--is to think about some way to formalize the idea of "changes to the 'fitness function'" in a collection of evolving entities over generations.
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > You could argue that breeding is likely to bring about "very large changes to the minimum Hamming distance between possible binary Turing machine indexes that could be used to represent each fitness function." I don't actually know that much about biological evolution--is it just the genetic code that evolves and mutates, or is there more to it than that??--but I think my idea is good.
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > Just so you know, I count that as "discussion of STEM ideas," not publication of anything truly new or revolutionary. I.e., I am talking about something I know in STEM, not trying to "serve anyone" with more valuable research disclosures.
> > > > > > > An amusing thing I just realized: It is almost certainly true that Abigail Spanberger has actually *never* worked for the CIA, and made up the whole claim to bolster career as a political leader. It sounds like she did not get a job there...I realized that there is something that she would definitely know if she had successfully obtained a TS/SCI clearance at that particular agency. It's actually quite funny.
> > > > > > I just realized that Stephen Cook and probably Kaveh Ghasemloo are probably good guys, and that Neil Immerman, although he proved P = NP in the 1980's, and Michael Sipser are likely bad guys who supported trafficking me. Timothy Chow is of course also bad. It would also appear that Sara More, the professor who gave a talk to the math department introducing me to the discrete logarithm problem, was also actually a bad guy all along, although that talk did influence me in a good way and launch my research career. All of the UMW professors, including math and CS professors, and all of the UVA professors that I briefly saw at an engineering building there when I took the GREs, which might have had my score modified by the bot, were all evil and supportive of the bad-guy government efforts to surveil and enslave and torture me, too. Additionally, all of the psych and other doctors I saw outside of Dr. Steg were evil, before I saw Dr. K, including Welton and others...basically, I won't say how I know but it is not illegal for me to say it, all of them would have *tried* to get in touch with me if they hadn't supported trafficking and torturing me, like the child predators that they all always were, and I would have found out about the effort...I am now at a point where I can *prove* that they were bad guys felons who were against me, but I refuse to say how i know.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > So that is my update for now.
> > > > > Quote of the evening:
> > > > >
> > > > > "News flash, Jennifer Polacks (that's all of you): None of you are 'cute and funny' like you think, all of you are pathetic pedophiles, who should be locked away or shot in the head and thrown in a ditch, whichever you make easier and more convenient for normal people who care about normal things and aren't idiotic freaks that no one has ever liked."
> > > > A few comments:
> > > >
> > > > - People who are fascists do have worthless lives, but they should not try to commit suicide. Instead, they should repent, be sorry, talk about what they did, try to change themselves, and try to get themselves sent to jail, so that they can pay whatever debt they have to society, whether that's life in prison or less than that.
> > > > - Thinking about it, I do know that my father really worked for DOJ....I don't know that he actually definitely ever worked for OPR, but when I was a kid, I went to his office one time, so I know he really worked there.. At the same time, I am skeptical that my mother actually got a master's degree in mathematics and economics, and worked for Booz Allen Hamilton as a defense contractor before I was born. I do not know that my mother is ever honest about anything, at this point. She had a friend, named Jacqui, whom my sister and I called "Aunt Jacqui," whom my mother claimed worked for the CIA. My mother and I and maybe my sister too visited "Aunt Jacqui's" apartment in Northern VA one time, but I'm now not sure that she actually worked for the CIA. There are a lot of things that my parents said when I was young that may not have been true...I think my family history, on my Dad's side is true, but I don't know too much about my mom's family, and many of them seem to be not possessing great values. I don't know that my Uncle Skip was in the military and electrocuted in some sort of "water and electricity related accident," and I can't be sure that my mother's father was really an electrician whom my mother "taught herself basically from his textbook which she called the 'cook book' when she was a child." My mother claims to run a tax preparation business and take many "tax courses" without having a CPA; she did always talk on the phone a lot, and I know that she claimed to have that "tax preparation business" as early as when I was 3. I don't know if any of that was true.
> > > I said "taught herself basic high school algebra from ..." .
> > Another thing that my parents said that I think may not have been true: They met a dance class, and both of them had been very sought after...Mom always had men that she wasn't interested making overtures to dating her, but she didn't like any of them until she met Dad. Dad told me one time when I was like 15 that "there's always someone who's interested in dating you, you just have to not care too much--my friend in the Army when I was cook in Vietnam when I was drafted before I wrote letters with my friend to get out of the military--so you just have to ask. One time, a woman said to me during a job interview, 'I like movies,' and that is how I knew she was interested."
> >
> > Even with the things I was told over the years that apparently were lies--I think my parents were extremely strange and deviant, quite mentally ill, very intelligent, not interested in getting help for themselves, and much much more into lying and fabrication than I had ever realized at all--I still knew very little about my parents. I don't know if my Dad ever had a girlfriend other than my Mom, and I kind of thought Mom never did have another boyfriend, but she never said either. It occurred to me that my Dad probably worked in Organized Crime as one of the divisions of DOJ that he was a lawyer at--I think he really worked there--so that he can learn about, e.g.., which doctors could be persuaded to commit crimes for him, and probably, before I was born, he selected a geographic region with schools so that I would be sent to schools that had teachers linked to organized crime...indeed, when I was like 9, I had a swimming lesson with a swimming teacher named "Rufus," who lifted up my swim trunks to reveal my butt at the South Run Rec Center when I was swimming at one of the last lessons...I later learned, at Lake Braddock in my Latin 2 class, that he was a history teacher at Lake Braddock, because I saw him come out of his classroom, which was right next to Ms. Conklin's Latin 2 class that I was in one time.
> >
> > Basically, I know almost nothing about my parents, except for who their relatives are. There seems to have been overwhelming support for trafficking me from all the neighborhoods I lived in and schools I attended...I haven't heard one "appropriate response," and I know how the system works and how people might think they can "cover their tracks" and pretend that they had no ability to help me or talk to me during the thing...it looks like Virginia very much "lost the battle for its good name to organized crime." It seems like a very large percentage of people I had interacted with over my life were in on this, I *know* what people can and can't do, to contact me and whatnot, better than they awarea and probably better than they do.
> Basically, I think UMW got "TJ-ified." There was this weird, ugly, very obnoxious little kid named Jeff Grafton who liked a bizarre space alien, whom I'm sure supported trafficking me, torturing me, and killing me, and he was strange and mentally ill too, stranger than I was in HS, who used to put the word "dinner-ifying" in his AIM away messages. He would make strange, giddy gestures in HS, and he now works for Google somehow. I think indeed, TJHSST students reached out to UMW to radicalize it, based on their ongoing obsession with me.
>
> Also: Any Democrat who has read my posts and still supports Joe Biden, and has failed to withdraw support for him within, say, 1 week from today, is *a confirmed and committed child trafficking and pedophilia supporter.* Denounce Biden, or face the true accusations of what you are.

On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 8:35:01 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 8:34:08 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 8:22:06 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 8:07:17 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 8:04:54 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:52:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:43:16 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 7:25:33 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 4:44:00 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 4:35:29 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 2:06:33 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 12:18:11 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > On Wednesday, March 1, 2023 at 11:48:48 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:00:40 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 10:15:18 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 9:40:36 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 9:07:21 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 8:11:18 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 7:48:21 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 7:38:38 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 4:14:31 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 3:33:40 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:59:36 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 11:56:42 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 10:50:01 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 12:30:35 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Tuesday, February 28, 2023 at 12:03:27 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 11:33:28 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 10:40:48 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 9:50:02 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 9:45:56 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 7:29:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 6:38:09 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 5:07:15 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:41:22 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:40:14 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:31:28 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 4:24:38 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 2:29:02 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 2:25:34 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 1:40:22 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 12:14:30 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Monday, February 27, 2023 at 12:05:02 AM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 11:52:51 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 10:34:20 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:54:20 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:12:54 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 8:08:43 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 7:03:13 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 7:00:27 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 2:39:55 PM UTC-5, B.H. wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, February 26, 2023 at 12:44:04 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, February 25, 2023 at 11:15:19 PM UTC-5, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ...the bot shot down my post again, but I thought to copy it before I posted it, so I can still paste it below:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just had a totally great idea just now! I was reflecting on the fact that I recently devise two very excellent STEM-based ideas for figuring out how to predict the stock market. I also have devised some great STEM-based ideas for how to communicate well, especially in writing...that project of devising more such ideas is ongoing.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Then, it occurred to me, based on some of my notes about my recent chess games: I could get into using STEM ideas to analyze and especially improve my performance at chess and running.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I decided to go back to Deep Run Park to start doing at least a little bit of running, now without music, starting tomorrow. I will still walk at the mall, because I don't find walking at DRP to be relaxing given all the weird people who show up there. Anyway, that is my new plan for what to do with my time now...I have been feeling fine, did well today, and felt less restricted and more "able to not have to be 'calming down' at night to feel OK," than I had felt in the past. The bot choking affected me only minimally, my mood was still much better than it had been in the 2 weeks preceding.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, that is my update for now. I feel a little unhappy that I am probably going to be known only as a writer, and not a science publisher, but think that is the right decision for me. I will get credit for writing, and I might branch into "persuasive/quasi-political non-fiction," as opposed to "here-you-go-America-free-service" non-fiction, as I was sort of thinking of doing at first. I really doubt I will change my mind, the decision, which seems quite right, is still just slowly sinking in...I am very likely to be a writer, full-time, and pour my STEM ideas into that, not any "sharing of secret family-enabling math ideas."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I will get more used to the idea and enthusiastic about it after it has been sinking in for a few days or weeks..
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > After reviewing my job applications again, I am ready to say that I'm cautiously optimistic that I will get a job. I am not sure, but I am eagerly anticipating hearing back from one or more of the employers that I applied to in this next upcoming week.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Today, I'm going to do my usual things--not really start in until 2, although it's kind of boring to just do nothing for so many hours when I keep waking up at around 10 or so...I woke up in the middle of the night last night with a very fast heart rate, but it settled down and was fine, it's probably related to past bot conditioning attempts, and my cardio is good enough that I will be fine I'm sure.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm going to do my run, and start investigating "performance enhancement science" ideas...I'm pretty sure I will be the most competitive person in the world at that, as well as at, in general, physics, computer science, mathematics, statistics, communication, and writing.. Hopefully I will get my chess game and exercise abilities in top-notch shape, too!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I believe I get it...I understand something...anyway, I decided to skip running for today after all, and focus on other "research-related activities."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I will do great, and my plans at this point haven't really changed.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A quick comment about a new understanding I have of my CIA opponents: They think that their attention to detail, thoroughness in planning, and very aggressive engineering efforts will, once demonstrated, somehow "break my morale" because (they think) "I am immoral" because "I am mentally ill and not Christian," and I do not acknowledge them as being above me in any way morally--for sure, given how they act. Basically, they have been continually baffled by how their aggressive demonstrations have led to me absorbing and reverse engineering a lot of their most valued secret technologies, including ones that I find knowledge of to be extremely useful to me and that I do not wish to repeat, even though I could since it is not my disclosure of classified information (is it classified?) that is being readily passed to unauthorized persons, that is what they are doing. The compartment of the CIA that is supervising in a way what is happening is apparently very much unaware of some of the secret technologies I have learned about, simply by spectating and watching their absurd, inappropriate theatrics.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just felt like saying that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > In short, it seems like almost nothing will stop the CIA from illegally leaking many of their most valuable classified secrets to me, rather frequently, without my consent or permission. I am being very unusually educated, and I did not ask to be.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Another thing I realized about Richard Darkins' comment: If people in the US are familiar with me and Biden's attacks on me, then if they really think that Biden is going to succeed at continuing to bother me, given how many times he has lied and how I have been perfectly honest and the fact that honesty is a trait and the five-factor model is established science, then such people clearly do not understand or do not accept the science of the five-factor model.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I learned a lot more important and interesting things today.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My updates list of activities in the future is now:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - publishing writing (fiction and maybe non-fiction)--no STEM or writing code at all
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - investing, based on scientific principles and not computer algorithms
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - day job (I might not reveal where I would be moving or what industry it is, given the levels of harassment and friendliness around here)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - boxing (I think it is a good idea for me to pursue a sport in my free time, not just exercise)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - continuing private science research that I will not share to fuel my other endeavors
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I *think* I will still be able to Africa, probably in a number of years rather than right away. You will note, I am avoiding things that are unfairly "access denied" activities for minority people and others who face discrimination. My plans are perfectly ethical and benevolent. I will persist in my efforts to help Africa, and also likely to help out in whatever community I am able to settle in comfortably.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On a personal and psychological note: As I noted, I recently became aware that a lot of things can be addicting. I've done a good, perfect-track-record job of stopping watching adult videos and stopping listening to modern music on purpose, cold turkey. Today, I noticed that I was feeling a little bit different and more absorbed in my own thinking, partly in a good way, but I think it is because I have been doing too many gaming activities, especially playing "Space Trader Merchant Marine," which is actually a really fun game--I beat the whole 5-level campaign part of the game, and today, I finished the first two "challenge" sections of the game...I think there are three sections of the challenge thing total. Anyway, I think I'm spending too much time on gaming, and I need to take a break. I said it was for therapeutic reasons, and I don't want to over-do it. I am also going to not play chess for a while. I didn't play today, but I was playing lots of games in the past few days before that...in the future, I will probably limit my chess activity to weekends. I'll probably still play a lot of games, but just in a few segments. I had been playing games with 10 minutes per side, and I was doing it for practice. I got tired quickly in many cases.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Thus, I have decided to stop all gaming activities for the next 3 days. In four days, I'll evaluate and see if I want to start up again, or if I'm doing fine without it. I might eventually finish the last challenge thing in STMM, but I don't want to mess up my health, particularly at a sensitive time like this for me, when I'm still being assaulted by bots sometimes, even choked at night, with the full and extremely inappropriate support of Congress.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I know what I'm going to be working on for the next few days also. I'm planning out what to do while I wait to hear back regarding my job search. I applied to about 10 jobs, and I decided that I won't apply to more jobs...I believe I'm qualified, and there shouldn't be any reason why I wouldn't hear back from the employers even just having applied to 10 jobs. If my "email interview" rate is less than 10%, something is wrong anyway.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK...I'm done with everything I was going to do tonight, really. I have a little bit more food to eat, I'm going to try to relax and feel good, hopefully I'll get a good night of sleep without bot interruptions, and I am looking forward to having a peaceful day tomorrow...maybe I'll get a phone interview request since it's Monday, we'll see! I am trying to be optimistic and good-natured.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Some sort of random thoughts: I have started to feel as though I do not like the websites youtube.com or cnn.com visually. I wonder if that is a psychological thing, since I don't use YouTube for modern music any more. I sort of don't like logging in to YouTube sometimes, just because I don't want to have to look at the web design of that website.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I have a pleasant enough day planned for tomorrow. I have decided that I will not be traveling anywhere far until I can get a job. My only work task tomorrow is going to be working on a STEM-based art, writing, and communication idea tomorrow...it should be interesting, even though I really only have an hour set aside for that work, and no time set aside for any other work. (I'll probably have to stock up on groceries again tomorrow.)
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It might be a challenge to find things to do until 2 p.m. when I wake up, since I'm not doing any gaming activities for 3 days. Maybe I should try to think of something to do if I wake up at around 10 or 11, which I probably will. I would want to do something relaxing and low-stress....hmmmm...I don't think I should get involved in doing anything on the internet, and I don't really feel like reading...Shift is a fine novel and I'm some number of chapters into it, but I don't want to keep reading it right now. No gaming, so that basically rules out everything on the computer other than typing, since I said no internet. Hmmm...maybe I could drive somewhere, but I don't want to over do the trips to the mall for walking, 1 or 2 a day seems to be enough. Also, my typical thing to do for now is sort of "act like I haven't woken up until 2" since I am trying to be nice to myself for sleeping better and having woken up early, so I have been typically not eating or showering until 2. I don't think I want to exercise in the mornings...what shall I do? I already told Rosey that I am going to try to space out my visits with her to be only about once every two weeks, which she seemed to approve of, along with my other (perfectly legal to make) disclosures about IC/military technology to her that may help her understand household life better. AFAIK, Rosey understands a lot of English quite well...I think she has some ability to learn words from reading emotional cues, I don't think she understands every single thing I say, but I sort of think she knows how to "prioritize her attention" based on tone-of-voice cues, and I bet she can kind of tell if I'm just saying some sort of "generic 'good girl! what a good puppy!'" kind of thing, and when I'm saying something more content-heavy that she should try to parse the words of. That is just my guess though.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think I also do not want to try to watch any TV shows. I think what I should do is some sort of "fun, easy, relaxing, psychological health activity"...something I can just type about and not get too "new STEM heavy" with, but just some sort of simple enough prompt-based idea for thinking of something to say about myself and the interactions I've had in some way that could maybe help my psychological health, particularly in terms of decreasing stress and anxiety and "ghost feelings of upsetness" that I can't explain. That is probably what I will do tomorrow...I'll probably try to design a prompt for that tonight and write it down on my computer, and then consider doing that tomorrow early on if I'm up early.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Hopefully I can think of something sort of mildly original and different from the usual psych activities I have done in the past.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Yo, I just have to let you know right now...the truth is, I thought of the 'Calculus Man' joke before anyone else, it was my idea. Everything else? It was exchanged for that joke by the creators of Superman. I'll show myself out now."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Something occurred to me this evening...probably, Sasha Burkhoff, whose names sounds like it was selected by her parents to sound like "the perfect name for a well-respected cryptologist," and thus a possible prospect as as NSA recruit as a mentally healthy student who had attended TJHSST in Virginia, had her brain-tumor-caused murder orchestrated initially by pro-life activists. According to my analysis, there is no other reason or group who would do it. I never actually spoke with Sasha, just saw and much later thought to recall a look she gave me when I think she had been diagnosed by the brain tumor, but I didn't have a strong emotional reaction, not that I was unkind or inappropriate about it in any way, but my sense of it is, she sounds like a target of pro-life religious extremists who didn't like TJHSST in general, didn't feel it was worth to murder me--they surely faced counter-attacks, probably including lethal ones, for their actions--since I was set up to be tortured as a math slave for years, and they could only pick out one student to kill to send a message about the NSA and the types of extremist fighters whom they might have felt would work there...in theory...so my sense of it is, even if she was a religious Christian and supported pro-life positions, she might have been targeted for not being "tough enough" on pro-choicer's, like my grandmother, who was kind to me although I am a liberal atheist...she even tried to not speak to me too much when I was physically present in the house, apparently that doesn't suffice for the extremists. Anyway, it is also certainly possible that Sasha was actively pro-choice. I think my theory is right. Relatedly, probably, Heath Ledger was murdered over some sort of political cause he had supported in a movie before The Dark Knight...I don't know what that would be, but my guess is, judging from Julia Stiles's comments about Ledger and Chrissy Teigen, who emotionally abused and harassed a gay man, according to what I read, he probably supported gay rights much more than actresses like Maggie Gylenhall and Julia Stiles felt comfortable...probably more "pro-choice, that's it, I just say I'm liberal" types.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, I realized that Dr. Kudurogianis was not evil...he is also facing threats, I'm sure, and did the amount of helpful psychiatric work that he felt he would be able to do safely...I think he omitted some "emotional distress" and "employment/socialization" issues due to reasons I would not understand, perhaps related to his safety or something else. I think it is fairly clear that the psychiatric treatment that he did helped me a lot...if I become suspicious that he was actually evil once again, based on me having noticed some detail that I hadn't seen before, I will probably be sure to post my latest theory about that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Great news for people who are on my side! I spent this morning beginning and planning out further work on a "STEM-based system for recovering psychologically from harassment attacks," so that I can use some of my best secret ideas to identify cognitive issues I may be having, including with "inclinations to snap at other angrily," feeling restricted from doing certain things for no good reason, not caring enough and feeling callous about people whom I'm trying to care about and ought to care about, and other issues, and use my competitively excellent ideas to work on "fixing the damage to my mind muscles/processes" so that I can "exercise those muscles" healthily and without pain so that I can get them to be stronger and working properly, as they were in the past and should be for my health and sense of identity/self-concept. Also good news: I think that given local residents' plots to sabotage me psychologically for whatever weird reason, this announcement will demoralize them, and my announcement that it will demoralize them will likely vex them if they want to start up more strange "Wile E. Coyote schemes" to "trick and deceive and psychologically 'hex'" me to feel or perform in a way that is not my best. I.e., I think they will start to realize that their weird and freaky endeavors to mess with me are not a good investment of their time, and they'll sense the regret and unhappiness they will feel later when they see that it didn't work and was all just a frankly pathetic waste of their time, and their movement to bother me will lose enthusiasm.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, my psychology activity for this morning was a big success! I have planned some more work on it to do tomorrow, during my main hours of activity during the day, after 2 p.m.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A comment about this ordeal: I note that there were *very many* people who, in this crisis situation for me, were essentially required to do enough of their part to "give me the password" to get out of trouble. A lot of people refused, in some cases citing right-wing extremist ideology, and in other cases citing threats to them and their families. The thing about the latter situation is, basically, a lot of people "passed the burden" to my family leading to at least two relatives dying, very likely murdered by the CIA, while the other people "wanted to play it safe." I.e., by not doing their jobs, they aggressively and inappropriately passed the "lack of safety burden" from their families to mine, causing damage. Thus, the "right to be outraged and to retaliate" lies with the people who are in my family who are unethical, not with them. Basically, the JACM, Cornell, and Cambridge University in Britain, murdered my grandmother and my uncle, citing, in a sense ,a desire to be safe by virtue of having a good, sustained relationship with political terrorists and mobsters in the CIA, who illegally kill innocent people to seek to pursue their political will.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said "people in my family who are ethical," that's an inserted typo.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Oh, Publix just started discriminating against me today...how original and surprising. I CuRrEnTlY have a very thick skin about this sort of thing, and it doesn't bother me or affect me that much...I will keep shopping there for now while I still live in this dumb area. It's just, "Say goodbye to all your appealing future career possibilities, Publix employees! You don't even know what you are doing professionally, at all, and the double entendre in this sentence is intended!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Regarding my job search...I can see 9 of the jobs I applied to on the panel on the job applications website; the region I applied to is in a different time zone in the USA. I am very qualified, and I applied last Wednesday. I hope I am not being locked out by another tiresome political attack on me for no reason, one that would have pointed at me no matter what I said or did, simply because I am a mentally atheist. Anyway, I only heard back from one employer so far, and they said no to my application. Hopefully I will hear more from the other employers within the next few days...how thoroughly did Donald Trump and his lieutenants seize control of the US job market??! I hope I won't wind up just sitting here, exerting political power by typing out things on Usenet, using new STEM ideas that I have that are under development that bad guys wouldn't understand because they are not able to "crack the code" of the English language! I would really prefer to be an employed private citizen, not an ongoing law-abiding anti-US-government antagonist using cutting edge STEM capabilities to trip up US political agendas pretty much every day! Gosh, I wish I could stop feeling compelled to mess with with the USA's secretly right-wing extremist, anti-Semitic, anti-Muslim, anti-atheist government for a week or two!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The US Democratic Party has never before been forced to negotiate a full, unconditional "political surrender" to anyone, have they? Well, if I'm still here in a couple months, you'll all get to find out that feels. Imagine an America with *NO LIBERALISM WHATSOEVER.* Are you excited to live in that world? Is that what you are voting for by denying my rights, or would you like to delude yourselves and side with Biden? Indeed, I *couldn't* convince the Democrats to stop hurting or be reasonable...I can't educate them on how to be smart and rational, all I can do is destroy everything everything they ever fought for, for me because I like me and I think my life and rights matter, and then keep attacking everyone, ruining everything they've gotten and fought for over the years, until they have nothing left and realize how dumb they were.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Would you be gentler in some way if I did what you did to me to one of you? No! You are doing things to me, and I haven't committed *one* crime against any of you or any of your backers. If I had eagerly served you and gotten nothing in returned, you would have tried to Auschwitz me anyway, and would not have backed no matter what. Get ready to see where this path with leads, I'm now apparently about to be your tour guide to a whole new America that you will not recognize and not like, because it will have been politically completely re-shaped by me with cutting edge science ideas, unless I am able to not face discrimination during my job search. How much is it worth to you? Did you, "everything?" Hint: Yes, and you're right! That's what it will cost. You're already paying a large percentage of the total possible cost, do you want to increase that or decrease that?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Basically, my failure was, I thought the US leaders were self-interested and smart. I thought they would be smart enough and not crazy, and would let me have my rights and let me go. I guess they are not that smart, and insist on being pummeled some more. Either that, or I'm gong to be getting interviewed sometime this week that's for sure.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Basically, at this point, if you have been a bad guy linked to the team of people who are homicidally stalking me, if you are not done with me by the end of this week and I am not actively interviewing for jobs, you will soon be done enjoying any benefits of American liberalism, period. I have the power to do that, no one else does. Did you miss what happened to Build Back Better, abortion rights, the US military's power, Biden's approval ratings, Democratic control of Congress, and even Donald Trump being used as a threat or having a viable candidacy, due to my use of my STEM powers and the US government's failure to heed my protest on behalf of my basic Constitutional rights? In that case, I even *told you fools* *exactly* what I was doing, STEM-wise. Next time, it will be a different set of excellent capabilities, and I will not tell you a think about what I'm doing, it will devastate Democrats politically, you won't be able to guess what I'm doing with algorithms or anything else, and it will all be perfectly legitimate and in accordance with the rules. Now let me go or face the consequences!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I did a great job on my STEM research task today...things are coming along extremely well, and my work is even more fun than usual. I have more such work to do tomorrow.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Regarding the conflict: To say it again another way: The clear and repeated and persistent, un-American argument of my opponents who think I should be caged and not allowed to socialize, date, or have a job, is: "We have every right to ignore the separation of church and state and freedom of religion in the US Constitution, because we would prefer to view atheists as cattle, with worthless lives, whom the government has the right to slaughter or try to slaughter, without any respect for their rights or feelings, at any time that we choose, with no regard for any laws. We may also slaughter people like cattle that we see as 'failing to dehumanize atheists' and being too friendly with them." That is the kind of extremist you've signed up to support if you're backing Biden and his cronies. You don't want to go there, it's roughly the same thing as anti-Semitism.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A couple of developments:
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 1 - It looks like the mall has changed its hours, and now it closes at 7 p.m. I don't think it used to...I wonder if the Christian church that meets in two of the store-type areas had something to do with the change, to make a statement about me?
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 2 - It occurred to me this evening that some time ago, someone credible hinted to me that I was likely being considered for the position of Secretary of Defense some time ago. I might have been the youngest one if my various promotions and career achievements hadn't been sabotaged! It is probably a good idea for me to mention this at this time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A dramatic reflection on my recent learning endeavors:
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Ze codes, Mr.. Vite. Ze codes! Now you see...velcome to schizophrenia, ze codes, zey make you genius!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I seem to be mostly out of jokes though. Remember when I said--rapped, rather:
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "If I say things are like things and express opinion
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Each booty babe will fail to not become my minion"
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ...remember when that seemed like it was going to be true?? What happened????!! All those comedic rap songs, and all I got was...uh...deniably video messaged by Zara Larsson and then blocked. Step up to the plate, yo! You only live once, and there's only one me. My arrogance, like so much else, knows no bounds...just as it is with my physics knowledge, I'm one of a kind! Now, in a space-time continuum sense, it is all women in the USA who are desperate, deep down, maybe unconsciously, to meet me, and not the other way around! Again, it's like Linkin Park always envisioned for me: "So [he's] waitin' until the upper hand is [his]....". Don't disrespect the prophecy, yo!
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Would that I could calibrate my jokes to be funnier, for the perfect audience...forsooth.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (Yes, this again.)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, I do not actually know if Zara Larsson is a Nazi who supports murdering me for being an atheist. I wrote above assuming she was not.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, regarding the Richard Dawkins Tweet: Here is a really good idea; I would think that every single US citizen who is currently residing in the US, has heard of me or met me and heard what happened to me, is alive and feeling well, and never supported right-wing extremism, and didn't get a chance to get in touch when I demanded to be contacted between Sept 2020 and the present, ought to send me an email, at least wishing me well, maybe offering to see if there is anything such a person could do to help me, given that I will have basically just gotten out of a de facto American (??!) concentration camp.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The obvious question about why any such person who would read this and then not get in touch with me is, "Why not?," and it would tend to suggest that such a person, given my insistence and biography and status as a virtuous bipolar American atheist, would either feel "extremely threatened by a still-tyrannical US government," or, more likely, would be a "radicalized right-wing extremist residing in America who supports ethnic cleanings operations, against the mentally ill, against atheists, and against black people residing in Africa." Otherwise, why wouldn't such a person at least send a quick email checking it? It would seem to suggest some sort of "mass radicalization epidemic" that hit the USA, that would have hit the people who refused to contact me, and that there is indeed, as Fox News suggested when speaking of a "silent majority," that a very large number of people in the USA have apparently converted to fascism. Otherwise, I would receive at least a quick "glad you're feeling better' email for sure, from everyone who had heard of me, given that I would be like Anne Frank if she had managed to just finish escaping from a Nazi concentration camp...surely all of the people who wished her well and didn't support her being tortured and murdered by Nazis would want to send her an email congratulating her on her escape and wishing her well? There could be no other explanation, of course.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK, so I am going to go to bed soon. I am pleased that, looking at the text I've written and the lack of any coherent response to it or accusation from government officials or anyone else with authority, it is clear that it has been clear, for months now, that I am totally and 100% a victim of right-wing extremists in government and beyond...I am not a bad guy and never deserved this. So that is good.
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> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, my science projects are going well. I am feeling a little bit mildly restless at night--it is hard to tell how much of that is due to the wake-ups from the government-linked bad guys--but mostly I feel fine each day. Just bored, ready for things to change so that I can get out of here and have a real, normal life as I and other innocent people deserve to have. I am one of the smartest and most talented people in the world now, so in spite of my set backs, I am a fairly fortunate person in terms of talent and long-term (decades-type term) outcome...I'm sure I'll be doing great in my 40's, I'll just be a little bit older and past my prime physically. Mentally, I'll surely still be the best theorem prover in the world, and that will be the source of my talent, which I'll be sure to stockpile and keep to myself.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So...I am trying to think of ways to relax at night. I looked at the YouTube videos again, and in spite of my different viewing choices, they are all completely *useless*, the recommendations totally suck and it is unpleasant even looking at the thumbnails on the main page. Now that I'm avoiding Twitter due to discrimination, I am starting to feel like groups.google.com is the only site I ever want to visit, except for maybe checking my email accounts on Yahoo and Gmail, and also occasionally glancing at cnn.com, which is also a crap website, but I ought to know a few of the top headlines that are not being covered up at any given time. So yeah. I am finding writing in my offline files to be more productive and interesting than anything there is to do online. I like typing in my offline files and walking, and eating, and I wish I could socialize and date and maybe have sex. Other than that, I'm not all that limited...I can't do work for money yet, perhaps due to government limitations, but I can still exert more political and other power than anyone else in the world...I'll have all my latest ideas set up and ready to use soon, and I'll just type what I want to type on Usenet, and see how that goes. It should have an impact, and again, it won't be unethical or against the law...I'll be sure. So my "job," coming soon if I'm not released or employed, will be writing appropriate STEM-backed posts, in captivity, on the internet to continue to exert my political will on the world. I should be allowed to socialize and friends--I'm a perfectly nice and quite normal person, I follow the rules, don't do anything wrong, just file complaints about the epidemic of weirdos bothering me and never start fights, always do the right thing, never do any weird or creepy/strange things to other people like try to "scare them" or follow them around or harass them, always behave appropriately and like I should. Anyway, I'll see where this ends pretty soon I'm sure...the bad guys, I don't think, can take many more losses...I mean they can, but they really wouldn't look like they are even employed if they keep pushing with this, I don't get how such high-power leaders of the US, in such a competitive field, can be so completely stupid, irrational, nakedly and publicly pro-extremism and pro-terrorism, and able to still maintain approval ratings of about 30%. I admit, I'm quite stunned by that capability...how can such incompetent figure out a way to keep their jobs without ever doing them, how on earth do they do that? I'm not jealous and don't want to copy that, but the example is stunning and interesting in its own right, like Caligula's success as a Roman leader.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Once again, I am thinking some more about Richard Dawkins' Tweet. Liar drops R; maybe that means, Joe Biden drops Regency Mall, without the monolith, i.e., I will get hired based on the region I correctly applied to. If so, great! That will be excellent. My usual "Donkey Kong dance," not that I think mentally ill people should be considered apes, but I'm thinking of the "aggressive impactful stomping" of sorts, before big event relevant to me that might be sabotaged that may require a "vocally aggressive send-off to the immediate predecessor time" just before the full result is in, to pre-attack in case I've been "foiled again by a pinball-tilt wizard with no ethics or sense of 'gosh, that was too much, enough is enough,'" is basically contained above in some of the writing. I basically always do that, in this situation where I post a lot in public, right before I think that something big and important I'm working towards is about to possibly be sabotaged into not working right again, based on an initial "bad sign," which just be an incidental thing and nothing to worry about over all.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I'm thinking maybe I will get a job. I hope so. I'm going to turn the computer off pretty soon and get more fully ready to fall asleep.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, I am a little bit worried about: the guy with the bald head who used to also walk on Quioccasin Road who I think was mentally ill, Kristen, who sometimes walked on Quioccasin Road and seemed to have disappeared recently, and the guy that I saw who was black who seemed like he was mentally ill on Quioccasin, and the white guy who looked like he liked to wear military camouflage type of clothing and a hat whom I would see on Quioccasin road...there was also the black guy that I called "nodding head man" who used to bother me, he might have been mentally ill, and maybe I shouldn't blame him for having bothered me by nodding his fast when I was very much more sensitive and messed up due, I think, to trauma-related mental illness. Is anyone going to help them if they are still in trouble and not where they want to be in life yet? They looked like they were totally shunned by the local community and very under-supported, if they did indeed have mental health problems...probably they weren't even all identifying as atheists. I hope that my "monolith" will be their "monolith," too, i.e., that they will be able to get out of isolation, if they're in isolation in the Tuckahoe area and not already out of isolation.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A couple more comments:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Yeah I trained my "inner word-fighter persona" in melee combat with Ras al CVS. I stole the power to be extremely rude, with or without a reason of any sort.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - This morning, I noticed that my neck and shoulders felt a little weird and sort of sore, like it would feel comfortable to rest my head by tilting it to the right, like I was Stephen Hawking who was paralyzed and had his head looking like it was at an angle in his wheelchair, at least that was my perception...maybe it was not actually at much of an angle, checking the photos on Google briefly. It sounds like a nasty joke about me and atheists and highly competent STEM people, and I received a credible psych hint about the government-linked gesture doing this, suggesting that it is not a total surprise, perhaps, and a psych professional somewhere knew that a gesture of this nature would be done at some point, and maybe the perpetrator's psychological state and behavior are not necessarily hard to explain or predict, to an extent, at all. Yes, there is probably something psychological to be learned from my own initial explorations into basic amateur psychology...what did I reach for first, how is my "first-choice" lens to reach for characterized? Whatever. I'm mainly pivoting back to "easy psych ideas," just because my psych "research," amateur and not valuable/competitive or not, is mainly just to help me improve my own health for now, not to win any "innovative psychology research contests" or anything along those lines. I'm more interested in competing, vaguely speaking, at "applied math that I can use to get ahead at almost anything performance-related," in a variety of different contexts.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Remember: It is the lives of Nazis and other intolerant right-wing extremists that are worthless, not the lives of the people that they target and despise.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > youtube.com/watch?v=C9SiRNibD14&embeds_euri=https%3A%2F%2Ftwitter.com%2F&source_ve_path=MjM4NTE&feature=emb_title
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yes, this video is sad. Science is a good thing--the means to power, health, safety, technological progress, and often prosperity.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, it is concerning that this woman from Africa is trying to like Newton's scientific achievements with colonization. There is no evidence that science is linked to discrimination or exploitation of minority groups or people outside of the US.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A concern is that many people would argue that people who want to support colonizing or otherwise support exploiting Africa ought to be killed, i.e., if it is not illegal in your country to kill someone who wants to support fascism or slavery-like activities, then it would not be a bad idea to kill that person, like killing a Confederate or Nazi soldier in battle; the lives of confirmed fascists are worthless, and within the constraints of US law in America, ought to be either imprisoned, killed, or otherwise removed from relevance and ideally prosperity, as soon as possible. That goes for anyone who wants to eliminate some or all people from a particular legitimate background as though they had no rights, whether the background is ethnic, religious, or something else not related to "being an evil predatory fascist."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I am hoping that she does not mean that she thinks that pro-science people should be killed. Sadly, if she adopted such a position and pushed for it, she would put herself into a very bad category. I am speaking about this because I believe that people in Africa, who may have been denied some Western educational benefits, deserve more of a chance to turn around mistaken behavior and not support hurting pro-science people, including science-interested students in school who might not thrive without education...although that is different from wanting "pro-science people killed," and she didn't say that she wanted that, I am just worried about the claimed connection between colonialism and science.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My point is that people who support murder and fascism become, after a certain possible grace period of controversial length, people with worthless lives. Most people who fought for Naziism in WW2 ought not be given a chance to "tell everyone they're sorry and repent," that's good enough. There are some fascists from different parts of history that should not be allowed out of jail for 500 years. I still oppose the death penalty avidly, but any person who converts to fascism, while not losing his or her rights as a possibly accused criminal person or not, loses the "desirability of their existence," although it might be illegal to kill them without a trial.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So my point is, do not ever join forces with fascists, no matter what opinions you may have about people from backgrounds other than your own--you may champion your beliefs and backgrounds, but never support the denial of rights or the denial of desirability of other people being alive, unless such people are fascists, i.e., people who themselves deny the desirability of being alive to others over a mere beliefs-based disagreement that does involve calling for the deaths of innocent, "maybe just wrong" people, as opposed to true fascists.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said, "that's not good enough."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Someone outside signaled me to "see Bill Gates," so I did.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > What is he saying? "PW aim [is getting close with] the world" ? What, now for the first time? Is this some sort of reverse psychology trick?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Why didn't Microsoft offer to hire me, since it understood my talent all along?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My aim is to have my own life, withhold my STEM talents as punishment for the "slavery and extraction" initiative that political terrorists backed, presumably because they didn't want me to get big at DOD because criminals in STEM business, like Zuckerberg and possibly also Gates--I don't know--might fear my rules-based leadership and top-notch talent at STEM. I also want to help Africa. Is there some sort of claim that I have been inconsistent in anything I said?? Is it claimed that my chemistry disclosure, related to BQP = P and disease cures, somehow does *not* cure cancer?? Please, check with an expert who still trusts you, if you can find one! I am definitely no longer "crank" by any measure, and I never was one, just somewhat ignorant about classical mechanics and other areas of physics--I had been quite behind on studying, now I am not--I don't have a deep understanding of relativity, general or special, but I get the very basics of QM, and I understand classical mechanics well.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Bill Gates must not smear me, or risk being seen as "just another big-money-man cheater who fought his way to the top, became 'a king of having money,' and added no value to the world," just as the excellent researcher and publisher CS Christos Papadimitriou seems to have predicted, sort of.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I *will* help Africa if I can make the money. Why wouldn't I? Is it claimed that I cannot, that I don't have the will to spend money on such things? Does Gates actually believe that a condition for my freedom, as a brilliant, totally innocent atheist who is much better at math, CS, and engineering than he is, even as a top-ranked business leader, is that I must "serve the world" with my STEM talents, publishing free "naked photos of all the things that make me powerful," so that he can make money from them and not I? I've given more than enough free STEM gifts to the world, it is time for me to be *compensated* for my work, and also, well past time for me to be liberated--unlike Gates, I've never been credibly accused of committing a serious crime.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe Gates is questioning why I have lost interest in STEM. Oh, is he pretending that he doesn't know a certain fact about computers, or does he actually not know?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, if Gates is not a fascist or homicidal criminal at least, I *demand* his full support for my release. He should have offered to buy my IP, but not being a likely candidate for being ethical, he probably would never do that. I have nothing to fear from a "lacking Bill Gates like" as long as I do not work as a STEM worker in the STEM industry; his "like" is irrelevant in my new chosen field.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A question about the local community:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Are most citizens in the Tuckahoe area *actually* claiming that they "don't really have free speech rights or the right to peaceably assemble near me," or is that another fake-out attempt? If they believe that, do they accept that, and is their defense against further curtailments against their rights, due to their crimes, that "no one has the capability to do anything to us, so we're just going to keep doing our way?" I think that attitude will not get a good outcome; no one wants to tell you how certain techniques for dealing with "right-wing bad guy daredevils" are sometimes used to fight back.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Whatever that other post says on my thread, I am not reading it.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, the Little League tragedy of today is, Publix once again was deliberately out of YoCrunch (they claimed credit for it yesterday). Clearly, there is only one question about this situation: Will I, or will I not, get into volunteer "Retail Rap" under the rapper name, "Cashier Fatherf---er For Fun," and how many cashier careers will I mercilessly ruin with the awesome power of the pen?? IS there a limit to how much damage I can enjoy myself while sustaining it and waiting for whatever to happen? Who knew hurting bad-guy people's lives could be so fun???
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yo, I gotta start right there, I can't just leave that hanging, yo....
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > UNTITLED RAP
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > by Cashier Fatherf---er For Fun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yo, my name is Manheim, they think they're Julia Right
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A Stiles motherpredecessor, ring it up as a fight, yo...
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I can't delete losers as fast as I shop, but
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I would compete to get losers' heads on a justice chopping block
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > You know, I am an artist--my words are OK--because, I
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Fight relentlessly to just prove I'm still not gay, because I
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Am gay deep down, unless it's a statement to show, that
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm not intimidated by deletions of Yo-
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Crunch, um, you knew that was coming 'cause I rap about me
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I channel adrenaline and I charge a fee, you see
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The metaphorical gun flash but you think there's no gun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > And yeah, it's just a metaphor, I smoked you for fun
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > [begin snare]
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm not Obama--I just snort Confederates when stuck on an island
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > If I write aggressive raps and die will they scream, "Oh, why, man??!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Does anyone miss anyone without a new rap atmosphere?--no.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I thought I proved to them my strength is from being non-sex-queer, though.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quirky adrenaline, you'll never trace it down, guys
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I spurt technologies, and you lose blood like dead flies
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > You sign up for death and more death and I'm totally blameless
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I thought He'd cancel you, but everyone's shameless.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > [guitar solo]
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I need an outro that returns to the central
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Theme of my rap which is that you are all no-go's
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I use that word and not the p-slur--I'm perfect
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Still bag the groceries miss, your life is now worthless.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > That's my rap song! What do you think? I feel comfortable asserting that viciously insulting intransigent law breaker cashiers is not harassment or stalking, as long as I don't name names or say anything directly in public. I have a right to make political speech, in the form of art, whether your like it or not. A lot of people are saying that they hate me for stupid reasons, why not get more insulting, see if they like it more? Maybe some professional rapper will come out and say how much they hate me too, I'll be sure to quiver. Also, I'm still under duress, as anyone can see! The hate-fueled nightmare is supposed to never end according to them, I don't have to persuade you, if you don't know how to think, it's your graves, Confederacy punks! Fascists always lose! Don't delude yourselves about exactly what you are! Note, retail work is fine, if you do it WITHOUT trying to intimidate, harass, gaslight, or discriminate against people. Let's see how juiced up Bernie Sanders and Elizabeth Warren will get this time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > That was fun. Now on to other things.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yeah that's right I was actually mean, once. What!!!!!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > No I am not going to publish any new STEM ideas to help the military or other goons. I'm immune to all manipulative tricks, I'm done outputting STEM, forever, you're on your own, losers.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm starting to worry that Biden shut down my job search in another state, too. The job was one I was extremely qualified for, and I still haven't heard anything positive from any of the jobs I applied to.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So...do all geographic regions in the USA support the idea that Biden is completely control of law-abiding, intelligent religious minorities' members being able to get a job, literally anywhere? Can Biden shut down good career moves for any atheist in the USA? I suspect that the answer is yes, and no one will talk about it...I hope something really nasty and permanent happens to the people who are making sleazy deals of this nature, in clear support of anti-atheist fascism.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway...I don't know what to do next, I have fought and worked as hard as almost anyone ever could, but just as Einstein would have trouble getting out of a concentration camp if he had stayed in Germany for too long, all my talents and work and digging deep, and really exerting myself to try to look out for myself and exercise my legal rights and get a good job have thwarted by vastly populated legions, sadly, of American right-wing extremists. They are not being challenged enough, they have largely taken over the economy of the country, and contrary to my initial belief, it looks like they do not merely control STEM and retail.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > FYI, I am not saying it is a Jewish conspiracy, in case someone thinks that I sound like some sort of bad guy who is claiming that "Jews are trying to control everything." It is not Jewish people, it is American political crooks. WHEN will they cut this out? It has been almost 12 years, I tried asking nicely and appealing to reason and the evidence and my innocence, I tried demonstrations of my STEM talent and was just smeared (e.g., with the Hodge Conjecture, my logic result, the twin prime conjecture, etc.), I finally resorted to aggressively attacking the fascist leaders who are perpetrating this...what am I supposed to do? What is any person in my position, being innocent and just mentally ill and an atheist, supposed to do to get away from extra-judicial assaults and "containment efforts" made against by government-employed fascists?? Someone is supposed to fix this! I could warn of the consequences--some of them have already been faced--but I am growing tired of that. Don't try to convert the USA to a racist dictatorship, that is not good for anyone. Leave me alone and let me work!!! Fascists deserve death, not liberals!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just realized something: The government still thinks it's going to use "stress" and "psychological manipulation" to manipulate my mood and feelings, and put me in great distress--probably with a few more "false hope" things, then "choking incidents," then "weird and confusing signals that seem to be about something important...but what are they really saying?", and try to manipulate me into changing my mind into publishing more STEM.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > In the past, I definitely changed my mind about publishing differential equations--I thought it would help, and it probably did...it probably ended the US's ability to be a navy and air force superpower, basically permanently, unless more help would be provided by me.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I do not share things at random. I try to do what is in my interests, whether I'm stressed out and desperate (I probably won't be in the near future at all) or not. I have done a really good job on working on being able to relax. I AM NOT GOING TO PUBLISH ANY MORE STEM. I made sure, after I changed my mind on diff eq publication, to also change my mind and "declare law-abiding war on the US Department of Defense," and I did that, and I won...I tossed them a breakable code using BPP = P, and they can use it, but it doesn't matter--all their secret things were lost to their adversaries via flight surveillance and cryptology during the no-codes phase.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I won the war on DOD, they just want to deny it, and now shower THEMSELVES with false hope and optimism, thinking that they are "such great Christian guys, of COURSE they'll get it back, the US NEVER loses like this," precisely because the US has never been this morally wrong-headed or right-wing and extremist before; the US declared war on terrorism in 2001, and thus itself in the near future--today.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I WILL NEVER PUBLISH MORE STEM TO HELP THE GOVERNMENT FOR ANY OTHER REASON. It is over, I am keeping it to myself to fuel other endeavors, I am *never* going to try to help *anyone*, other than my own children, with STEM sharing or explanation efforts, EVER AGAIN.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe that will clarify some things.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My day today was fairly pleasant. I had to go to Food Lion to get YoCrunch because Publix still wouldn't stock it...whatever. I will probably write more "rather absurd rap songs" to exercise my sense of humor, since I can't even talk right now, but I'll probably be more light-hearted and less mean in the future.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Somewhat disappointingly, my schedule for my day tomorrow is basically exactly the same as my schedule for today. I worked for more than an hour on my math research task today, which was great and yielded some good ideas. I am still continuing the same research tomorrow, and I might do it for at most 2 more days before I move on. I am only doing real work for 1-2 hours a day right now, and I'm still on my gaming break. I might stay on that, unless I get more headaches soon.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I am starting to think that the end of this will have nothing to do with getting the job I was trying to get from the job search. Do I have to wait for the government to relent? What about waiting for the wildly nutty local citizens to relent? I don't see what they are thinking or afraid of or doing, why are they *all* *still* siding with fascist ideologies, do they think they will get some sort of warmth and protection from that? That is not a good move, side with the truth, good values, patriotism, the US Constitution, and me, not code-talking terrorist linked insider threat bad guys who "have a job in the government." I had a job in the government, let me tell you, that helps you 0% with law enforcement, whether you mention it or not, if you get arrested or TDO'd (I have never been arrested, but I have been TDO'd, twice by police, sometimes even improperly, shortly after quitting jobs as an NSA contractor...it changes nothing, which is how it is supposed to work). I.e., even if you think you have power from a government position and try to abuse it, the police will just ignore that. It's just a job, it's not a magical "becoming a king or queen" ceremony, you really shouldn't see government employees as "larger than life," they're mostly very inefficient and ineffective at getting things done at the office.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So anyway...I am trying to be calm, since it's getting late. I am trying to relax and not vent any more angry feelings or "creative interpretations for debate/persuasion/etc." about this nonsense. I wonder what it will take for me to be spoken to again? I don't know. I might take a break from all work pretty soon, but then I wouldn't know what to do with all my time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Yeah, I wonder what the end of this will look like. Which will happen first? Will local residents come to their senses and stop backing fascists and code-talking liars? Will I get a job? Will someone from another state or another country write to me? Will the DOD write to me to apologize for their huge mistake/crime? Will the news run a story forcing a bad US political leader to resign, decreasing interest in this "project?" I don't know, but I've waited for over a decade for justice and access to my Constitutional rights!! What a farce, I don't know for sure what exactly these people are thinking.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I'm going to try to have a pleasant night.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, now that night-time is here, I note I would probably feel more relaxed if I typed something relaxing. Who knows why. I should be high-energy and full of comments and ideas and even a little bit of aggression during the day--I just remembered that I said I was going to stop being aggressive, but it is sometimes hard to remember all the different changes I wanted to make to improve my psych health, it's not that important that I stick to that, it is just important that I never publish STEM again.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, I think the "monolith" is: Regency Mall drops Regency, i.e., when the local mall loses its administrative authority given to it on behalf of a monarch. What authority is that? What exactly can they do? I think Dawkins' subsequent comment, which came out to "clatter lordie," suggests that the Christian church there got investigated for extremism after my comment...I did see a little bit of evidence of that, some man inside one of their areas made a sort-of Nazi salute gesture at me, I mainly just ignored that, that sort of thing is pretty common around here..
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe I should disclose more strange mall activity?...they keep sending groups of young men with one overweight chesty woman by to say things, the group today yelled "penis" when I looked at them, and the woman made eye contact with me and said something like "bye bye Kyle," which is the first name of a male patient at Dominion Hospital that I went to see Dr. Steg in 2001. Maybe it helps to repeat these things, I don't know. I heard some other man say "bye Felicia" loudly a while ago, a number of days ago, at the mall. I heard a woman who looked pretty and might have been Hispanic talking on the phone, near the "escape rooms" thing with her group of friends, and I heard her say, "I have a reservation" over the phone, perhaps she was from out of town.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Last time with the overweight chesty woman, the code was something like "a cost" then "most sag" and then the code had like "two sniffles" after that, I don't know what they were trying to say. Whatever, I don't get the point or message of what they're trying to do, it sounds unfriendly. I saw a group of teenagers coming by, and they made some sort of like aggressive gesture while looking at me, like, "WHAT?!", and I didn't pay that much attention to them.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > There was a large group of people singing in the Christian church area a few days ago. Today, a black man in a Harvard sweatshirt came out of the bottom of the elevator, holding a staff or stick or whatever. Today, I saw a security guy on one of those electronic rolling segue thing, making some sort of gesture. I saw a guy like that working for security before; he did that when I first started walking there, then the next a different security guy started quickly shaking his head at me, then I complained, then there were two security workers sitting at a desk, and one of them sort of "put their hands up," a lot like one of the female workers at Food Lion did one time. I don't know the gang codes at all, I'm just posting to maybe help "drop the regency of Regency Mall," maybe it will work!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Actually, no, DOS, "roboticdeepthroatconditioning.mil" is not a good idea for a web-based app for your upcoming startup. Get a little more creative, there actually are some fascists out there who are even better at thinking and science than you.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Rap About Walking In the RVA Area, Etc.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > by Broom Philip
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > I've got to find a place to walk every day
> > > > > > > > > > > > > The FBI is like shut down, so criminals may
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Do what they want to do whenever they want
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Follow me through shopping malls, grocery stores, and Deep Run Park
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > So I am writing a rap to kill some time, you know
> > > > > > > > > > > > > I see the anarchists have killed fighting crime, and so
> > > > > > > > > > > > > My free time's spent on research food and health
> > > > > > > > > > > > > While the world is acting like it's favored by stealth
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > They think the secret spies stalk their enemies better
> > > > > > > > > > > > > If they can't see it, they think, it makes women wetter
> > > > > > > > > > > > > The movie-like atmosphere of intriguing spy pirates
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Is, they think, the beauty of all violence in silence
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > The rap is weak today 'cause it's just a drill
> > > > > > > > > > > > > You'd rather have just me and not the FBI chill, but
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Indeed you wanted Sin City but got Gotham instead
> > > > > > > > > > > > > You think you're safest when your eyes are closed in bed
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > My self-expression requires no apology, now
> > > > > > > > > > > > > They changed god to mysteriousness in their brand new theology, now
> > > > > > > > > > > > > The Christian church no longer has its true savior
> > > > > > > > > > > > > And, they think forgiveness green lights every behavior.
> > > > > > > > > > > > Here is my latest prediction of how it will end: On March 14 or so, 18 days after Dawkins' Tweet, Biden has predicted in public in code that Vladimir Putin will be killed by a US-linked drone strike, and then Biden's approval ratings will go up and he'll look more likely to win the 2024 election. The truth is, though, the capabilities to be dominant, air-force-wise, over Russia have been removed for the US; they cannot possibly have the power to do that sort of assassination any more--no country has that kind of power any more, at least not over the top developed nations with the GDP to support "the standard air force." Perhaps the bad guys will finally drop me and admit assaulting me wasn't worth it, even taking morality out of the equation. *Hopefully* they will regain a sliver of their sanity.
> > > > > > > > > > > Update regarding my job search: I think I did apply to the right region--a place that is not against, e.g., LGBTQ people--and I think that there are firms that would like to reach out to me. My guess is, some political group essentially made "huge threats" against the firms that seemed likely to communicate with me, and there is a "brief pause for a battle," that the employers will win. So far, none of the 10 or so firms I applied to have written back except one...I bet they will, and it will just take a while, due to political pressure, which one of the firms even says it does not value above equal opportunity, even in cases of stalking.
> > > > > > > > > > A comment on an excerpt from the article linked to on Richard Dawkins' Twitter:
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > https://www.spectator.co.uk/article/who-really-discovered-dnas-structure/
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > "This is a story replete with competition, friction, misunderstanding and some sexism, but it lacks anything truly unethical, let alone criminal. Four men and one woman, none of whom was perfect ... "
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > What? "...it lacks anything truly unethical..." ??! How exactly can one claim that refusing to cite someone else's research contribution, particularly when there was a huge breakthrough with big incentivized possibilities on the table, not being cited is not unethical?? I believe they were truly paying attention, and got press and thus an opportunity to correct themselves...it is very unethical to fail to cite research contributions, unless it is an accident and, once this is pointed out, a full and profuse apology is made by the non-citers. Researchers, including me, very often do not get paid anything beyond, in the cases of Ph.D. professors, "acceptable satisfaction of publishing requirements" to keep their jobs--I don't know if there are raise calculations involved--and so it is very important to cite research and things that contribute to research whenever a publication is done. I try to do so even informally when, in the past, I published things on the internet.
> > > > > > > > > I also watched the first three minutes of this:
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=E3bLSePqCvc&feature=youtu.be
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > Interestingly, I didn't know about natural selection before I was in middle school myself...it is interesting to think about different education curriculums in different countries. I think I got better at understanding it in 9th grade. Also, I was very interested in genetic algorithms in college...before I figured out how to actually solve the discrete logarithm problem, one of my early attempts was based on genetic algorithms.
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > One way to view the idea of evolution speed--since you might wonder, with respect to what metric or dimension are you defining speed, or change with time?--is to think about some way to formalize the idea of "changes to the 'fitness function'" in a collection of evolving entities over generations.
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > You could argue that breeding is likely to bring about "very large changes to the minimum Hamming distance between possible binary Turing machine indexes that could be used to represent each fitness function.." I don't actually know that much about biological evolution--is it just the genetic code that evolves and mutates, or is there more to it than that??--but I think my idea is good.
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > Just so you know, I count that as "discussion of STEM ideas," not publication of anything truly new or revolutionary. I.e., I am talking about something I know in STEM, not trying to "serve anyone" with more valuable research disclosures.
> > > > > > > > An amusing thing I just realized: It is almost certainly true that Abigail Spanberger has actually *never* worked for the CIA, and made up the whole claim to bolster career as a political leader. It sounds like she did not get a job there...I realized that there is something that she would definitely know if she had successfully obtained a TS/SCI clearance at that particular agency. It's actually quite funny.
> > > > > > > I just realized that Stephen Cook and probably Kaveh Ghasemloo are probably good guys, and that Neil Immerman, although he proved P = NP in the 1980's, and Michael Sipser are likely bad guys who supported trafficking me. Timothy Chow is of course also bad. It would also appear that Sara More, the professor who gave a talk to the math department introducing me to the discrete logarithm problem, was also actually a bad guy all along, although that talk did influence me in a good way and launch my research career. All of the UMW professors, including math and CS professors, and all of the UVA professors that I briefly saw at an engineering building there when I took the GREs, which might have had my score modified by the bot, were all evil and supportive of the bad-guy government efforts to surveil and enslave and torture me, too. Additionally, all of the psych and other doctors I saw outside of Dr. Steg were evil, before I saw Dr. K, including Welton and others...basically, I won't say how I know but it is not illegal for me to say it, all of them would have *tried* to get in touch with me if they hadn't supported trafficking and torturing me, like the child predators that they all always were, and I would have found out about the effort...I am now at a point where I can *prove* that they were bad guys felons who were against me, but I refuse to say how i know.
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > So that is my update for now.
> > > > > > Quote of the evening:
> > > > > >
> > > > > > "News flash, Jennifer Polacks (that's all of you): None of you are 'cute and funny' like you think, all of you are pathetic pedophiles, who should be locked away or shot in the head and thrown in a ditch, whichever you make easier and more convenient for normal people who care about normal things and aren't idiotic freaks that no one has ever liked."
> > > > > A few comments:
> > > > >
> > > > > - People who are fascists do have worthless lives, but they should not try to commit suicide. Instead, they should repent, be sorry, talk about what they did, try to change themselves, and try to get themselves sent to jail, so that they can pay whatever debt they have to society, whether that's life in prison or less than that.
> > > > > - Thinking about it, I do know that my father really worked for DOJ...I don't know that he actually definitely ever worked for OPR, but when I was a kid, I went to his office one time, so I know he really worked there. At the same time, I am skeptical that my mother actually got a master's degree in mathematics and economics, and worked for Booz Allen Hamilton as a defense contractor before I was born. I do not know that my mother is ever honest about anything, at this point. She had a friend, named Jacqui, whom my sister and I called "Aunt Jacqui," whom my mother claimed worked for the CIA. My mother and I and maybe my sister too visited "Aunt Jacqui's" apartment in Northern VA one time, but I'm now not sure that she actually worked for the CIA. There are a lot of things that my parents said when I was young that may not have been true...I think my family history, on my Dad's side is true, but I don't know too much about my mom's family, and many of them seem to be not possessing great values. I don't know that my Uncle Skip was in the military and electrocuted in some sort of "water and electricity related accident," and I can't be sure that my mother's father was really an electrician whom my mother "taught herself basically from his textbook which she called the 'cook book' when she was a child." My mother claims to run a tax preparation business and take many "tax courses" without having a CPA; she did always talk on the phone a lot, and I know that she claimed to have that "tax preparation business" as early as when I was 3. I don't know if any of that was true.
> > > > I said "taught herself basic high school algebra from ..." .
> > > Another thing that my parents said that I think may not have been true: They met a dance class, and both of them had been very sought after...Mom always had men that she wasn't interested making overtures to dating her, but she didn't like any of them until she met Dad. Dad told me one time when I was like 15 that "there's always someone who's interested in dating you, you just have to not care too much--my friend in the Army when I was cook in Vietnam when I was drafted before I wrote letters with my friend to get out of the military--so you just have to ask. One time, a woman said to me during a job interview, 'I like movies,' and that is how I knew she was interested."
> > >
> > > Even with the things I was told over the years that apparently were lies--I think my parents were extremely strange and deviant, quite mentally ill, very intelligent, not interested in getting help for themselves, and much much more into lying and fabrication than I had ever realized at all--I still knew very little about my parents. I don't know if my Dad ever had a girlfriend other than my Mom, and I kind of thought Mom never did have another boyfriend, but she never said either. It occurred to me that my Dad probably worked in Organized Crime as one of the divisions of DOJ that he was a lawyer at--I think he really worked there--so that he can learn about, e..g., which doctors could be persuaded to commit crimes for him, and probably, before I was born, he selected a geographic region with schools so that I would be sent to schools that had teachers linked to organized crime...indeed, when I was like 9, I had a swimming lesson with a swimming teacher named "Rufus," who lifted up my swim trunks to reveal my butt at the South Run Rec Center when I was swimming at one of the last lessons...I later learned, at Lake Braddock in my Latin 2 class, that he was a history teacher at Lake Braddock, because I saw him come out of his classroom, which was right next to Ms. Conklin's Latin 2 class that I was in one time.
> > >
> > > Basically, I know almost nothing about my parents, except for who their relatives are. There seems to have been overwhelming support for trafficking me from all the neighborhoods I lived in and schools I attended...I haven't heard one "appropriate response," and I know how the system works and how people might think they can "cover their tracks" and pretend that they had no ability to help me or talk to me during the thing...it looks like Virginia very much "lost the battle for its good name to organized crime." It seems like a very large percentage of people I had interacted with over my life were in on this, I *know* what people can and can't do, to contact me and whatnot, better than they awarea and probably better than they do.
> > Basically, I think UMW got "TJ-ified." There was this weird, ugly, very obnoxious little kid named Jeff Grafton who liked a bizarre space alien, whom I'm sure supported trafficking me, torturing me, and killing me, and he was strange and mentally ill too, stranger than I was in HS, who used to put the word "dinner-ifying" in his AIM away messages. He would make strange, giddy gestures in HS, and he now works for Google somehow. I think indeed, TJHSST students reached out to UMW to radicalize it, based on their ongoing obsession with me.
> >
> > Also: Any Democrat who has read my posts and still supports Joe Biden, and has failed to withdraw support for him within, say, 1 week from today, is *a confirmed and committed child trafficking and pedophilia supporter.* Denounce Biden, or face the true accusations of what you are.
> I said, "who looked like a bizarre space alien."