Thanks for the good wishes. To celebrate, enjoy the screenplay dictator of democracy...
Http://rickfordictator.com/libris/dictatorofdemocracy

SCREENPLAY

DICTATOR OF DEMOCRACY

Copyright 2021 Richard Allen Hohensee
All rights reserved.

Act 1 ( of 3 )

EXT NIGHT

( title and opening credits are gold-leafed lettering carved into
a very dark polished stone with nice figuring. Dolly around the
stone to the texts, and then do a flip over the stone to a "Krust"
in the same lettering. Then dolly back to reveal that the stone is
the entrance sign at an estate gate. Portray an estate/compound of
one of the richest families in the world, the Krusts. Opulence and
underutilization everywhere. Then fly in a window in the main
palatial mansion. )

INT posh home theater

(Scooter Krust, a teenage male is changing the channels on a huge
TV with his 'phone'.)

ENTER Popper Krust

(Popper is watching video of a political debate on his phone,
which clashes with the various channels the youth is scanning. )

POPPER KRUST

Hold on Scoot. (fiddles with his phone pointed at the big screen
and the audio from the big screen syncs with what Popper is
watching. i.e. he sets the big screen to the same channel as his phone)

SCOOTER KRUST
What channel is that?

POPPER KRUST
RTV News. Twelve.

O.S. ( On TV showing debate stage )

CLYDE FETTLER (presstitute ) (This dialog is on Poppers phone and the
big screen while they are talking over it )

....so all candidates will be given the same total amount of time. If
they request to reply to something, that will be allowed, but will be
deducted from their final statement. So, please applaud now, for the
last time for the next 80 minutes. ( Applause. The end of which is a
good spot for the Krusts to stop talking.)

So, we now proceed with brief opening statements. Representative
Paydfour, please proceed.

REPRESENTATIVE PAYDFOUR (POLITICIAN )
( The Representative is an actor that looks like, say, Griff Jenkins,
but his face is divided vertically between blackface and whiteface.)

Thank you Clyde. This is the most important election in our nation's
history. The Suckupliphants have shown an unwillingness to negotiate on
even our simplest demands. Despite our shrinking minority in the
Congress, and despite our incessant pandering to minorities generally,
the Demographicrats are the party of the people. I have the unique
demographics to lead such a party back to the functional position the
American people deserve Demographicrats to have. (pad this with
platitudes to underlay the following Krust dialog)

( Scooter talks over this at about "Despite our ...")

SCOOTER KRUST
Do you have a favorite in this audition, Popper?

POPPER KRUST
Of course We'll be hiring a red this time for sure. I'm just
watching this to see if any of the blues need culling especially
badly. Sometimes I'll promote a blue to red, but this bunch is all
duds.

SCOOTER KRUST
What do you cull for, Popper?

POPPER KRUST
Well, for one thing, the blues don't get to mention foreign policy at
all. If they do they get buried in bagels by our near-eastern friends.
You don't want the peons (pay-OWNZ) slopping around in
foreign affairs, Scooter.

SCOOTER KRUST
Ah.

REPRESENTATIVE PAYDFOUR ( continues )
America clearly needs the leadership of a man that is 1/8
sub-saharan african, 1/8 native american, 1/4 Irish, and half
Hungarian. ( the other candidates scoff )

CLYDE FETTLER
Thankyou Representative Paydfour. Senator Dicey Bedfellow of
Mississippi, please proceed.

SENATOR BEDFELLOW (POLITICIAN )
(The Senator is played by the same actor as Rep. Paydfour, but with his
face painted up like the Italian flag with a light blue Star of David
on one cheek.)

Well Clyde, of course Representative Paydfour is not the man for
the job. The American people have spoken, many times, and the
message has been clear every time. The mix they are looking for is
1/4 Jewish, 1/4 Italian, and half Welsh. Only I represent what the
people really want.

CLYDE FETTLER
Thankyou Senator Bedfellow. Governor SoSuMe...

GOVERNOR SOSUME
(Gov. Sosume is also played by the same actor as the previous, but
with a dark bangs helmet of hair like Moe Howard that completely
cover his eyes.)

Koh nichie wah Clyde. As we all know, Americans are a forward-looking
people. This is why they want a President that is 1/4 Japanese, 3/4
Dutch. My opponents simply won't discuss my Japanese ancestry for that
reason.

CLYDE FETTLER
Thankyou Governor. Senator Palmgrease...

SENATOR PALMGREASE ( same actor, with a rainbow painted on his face.)
Thanks Clyde. Good to see you again, sweetie. (smile) All my dear
friends, look at the audience here at the engineering building
auditorium of Bolus University. Right here in the heartland of
America. What do you see? You see Germans, English, and Swedes.
Just like me. And I add the added benefit of a rainbow on my face.
This is what will beat the reds.. Rainbows always beat the reds..
(audience chuckles )
(shot of the audience, from a university in
Taiwan or Hong Kong, or India, ie a completely Asian crowd)

CLYDE FETTLER
Folks please don't interrupt the audish-COUGH- the debate.
Thankyou Senator Palmgrease. Ms. Ethnic, please proceed.

MS. ETHNIC (same actOR, not actress, female garb, Condoleeza Rice hair,
improbably large bosom, blackface, huge eyelashes )
Thanks so much Mister Fettler. As most of you know, I built my
cosmetics empire on two things.

VISUAL CUT WITHOUT CHANGING AUDIO
( Show Mike Mahalec sitting outside a fast food joint with a
guitar case, listening to the debate on headphones. The debate
audio continues... )

I know minorities. Why? I am most of them. That is the path for
Demographicrats to resume being the majority. ALL the minorities, like
me. And as we know, only twisted, self-hating women vote red. The
future is female and blue.

AUDIO CUT (We hear no more debate audio as Mike removes his phone
earbuds from his ears)

MIKE MAHALEC (to himself...)
Yeah sure it is. I'm quite sure yours is. Oh, SORRY to pick on YOU,
sweetie. I don't mean to imply that any of your colleagues are about
anything.

ACTION
( Mike goes to a nearby clump of trimmed shrubs that happen to have a
tomato vine among them and he picks a few cherry tomatoes. He eats
them, and then goes to the corner and opens his guitar case, sets up to
busk. He plays a few chords...)

MIKE MAHALEC (sings)
Imagine there's no Congress
Its easy if you try...

CUT --- KRUST ESTATE

SCOOTER KRUST
Popper, these people are pitiful.

POPPER KRUST
(laughs)
That's the way we like it, Scoot!
(They both laugh)
Fair dues, though, Scoot, they're very very good at being pitiful. Well
trained. With proper reinforcement.

POPPER KRUST and a chorus of Krusts
SONG ("Best Investment Ever")

(chorus)
Scooter Krust you have to see
It's really not so clever
when you're are a mogul like me
CONGRESS is the best investment ever
Forget land, Scarlet O'Hara.
CONGRESS is the best investment ever.

Scooter my son my son my son...
of everything your Popper ever buys
When all the cost accounting is done
Politicians have the gaudy R O I
the returns are always handsome
holding democracy for ransom
(chorus)
Scooter Krust you have to see
It's really not so clever
when you're are a mogul like me
CONGRESS is the best investment ever
Forget land, Scarlet O'Hara.
CONGRESS is the best investment ever.

Innovation is so passe'
Marketing might not linger
these days we just crush our competition
without lifting an industrial finger
we just grease our tools in Washington
and they regulate the arrivistes into oblivion
(chorus)
Scooter Krust you have to see
It's really not so clever
when you're are a mogul like me
CONGRESS is the best investment ever
Forget land, Scarlet O'Hara.
CONGRESS is the best investment ever.

SCOOTER KRUST
(bridge)
I get it! I get it! And I know the stakes!
I get it! MAN I get it! And I know the stakes!
for a mogul like I will soon be
Congress is the best investment ever
I really love my yachts and planes and cars
but Congress is the best investment ever
(chorus)
Scooter Krust you have to see
It's really not so clever
when you're are a mogul like me
CONGRESS is the best investment ever
Forget land, Scarlet O'Hara.
CONGRESS is the best investment ever.

CUT to debate Stage

CLYDE FETTLER
Senator Sosume, this is tonight's last question. We're seeing historic
federal budget deficits. Do you plan to address that issue as
President?

SENATOR SOSUME
I'm glad you asked that, Clyde. I assure you that The American people
can sleep soundly knowing that President Sosume has their fiscal backs.

CLYDE FETTLER
(beat) UH, right. Ms. Ethnic, last answer. What do you plan to do, if
anything, about the budget deficit.

MS ETHNIC
Thank you Clyde. Certainly, everybody's budget deficit will
improve with President Ethnic pumping out government jobs,
government programs, and government pro-activeness generally.