On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 6:20:29 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 5:11:40 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 5:07:12 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 5:05:25 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 4:53:30 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 3:36:13 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 3:17:29 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 3:15:53 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 2:57:32 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 2:57:00 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 2:45:48 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 2:11:11 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 2:10:43 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 1:57:20 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 1:37:11 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 1:30:19 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 1:27:08 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 11:42:28 AM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 11:01:25 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 10:25:05 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 10:13:46 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 10:01:46 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 8:43:49 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 8:37:42 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 8:33:35 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 8:31:34 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 8:26:08 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 8:21:26 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 8:07:36 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 8:03:20 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 7:03:07 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 6:57:22 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 6:54:34 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 6:54:01 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 2:39:51 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 1:57:39 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 1:52:41 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 1:33:10 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 1:32:46 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 1:23:19 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 1:17:20 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 1:14:43 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 1:08:07 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 12:33:17 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 11:35:26 AM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 11:33:05 AM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 11:32:04 AM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 11:25:41 AM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 10:33:43 AM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 1:17:18 AM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 12:11:33 AM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 11:05:54 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 10:19:48 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 10:11:16 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 10:09:31 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 9:43:38 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 9:24:32 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 9:23:18 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 9:14:36 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 7:49:10 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 6:54:31 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 4:57:19 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 4:09:15 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 4:07:48 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 3:10:28 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 1:13:31 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 12:45:10 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 12:37:54 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 12:16:57 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 12:02:41 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 12:02:09 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Here is what I had remembered to paste:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK, enough pushing back against bad guys for now. Yes, I still feel the glare of irrational lunatics and their backers, demanding that their wacky version of reality be breathed in and studied, and *discerned* without even being seated clearly...they want to debate on "easy mode," where they don't have to speak, the truth is merely *divined* from their hints. I have to take it into account, and yeah, the apathy about me winning the debate repeatedly and getting nothing sufficient out of it is unnerving. Whatever.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I am about get up and shower and eat and get dressed. I'll start my stocks work right after that. I'll probably do it in two phases, take a 30 min break, and then test it out and leave for a walk after I'm fully done. If it looks good enough, I might do a few trades tomorrow, and then get started in earnest the next day. My starting amount of money is just $300. We'll see what I can do!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said "stated," not "seated."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > !!! The bad guys had the bot choke me again just now, while I was eating. That is uncomfortable and stressful, and negatively impactful to my psychological health.. It is also a clear green-light--I'm still under duress--to publish my attack fiction, sometime soon. I'm starting with the stock market today, but I will begin the attack prose composition probably within the next week sometime, maybe over the weekend.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Does my nurse practitioner, Robin Jones, object to this behavior directed against me? Does she and Tucker Psychiatric have anything to say about this, and how it affects my health, and how inappropriate it is???
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 1 - It sounds like the bad guys, and the CIA green-lighters, are recommending to RVA men that they "try choking" on women that they go on dates with--they are advertising it as an abusive technique that works. It sounds like maybe Gloria Allred will be getting an influx of lucrative new clients soon, maybe she likes that and doesn't mind.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 2 - Are my doctors serious about focusing on my health?? This didn't happen with Dr. K. Is the focus on "helping out wealthy people who have said that they dislike me" to achieve their mental-patient-related goals, or is the focus on helping me with my condition? I had to stop seeing Dr. Wein because he was so egregiously on the wrong side of that line. I'll get my congestion cured someday by a real doctor, though.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 3 - Part of the purpose of the timed choking attacks is, based on the fact that choking is air-depriving, psychological, visceral, and biological in ways that I and most other people have never studied, it is supposed to condition me to alter my behavior and mood, and to make me stop doing certain things that the bad guys want me to stop doing. I can't know exactly what, but I'll stick to my core projects for now. I would really prefer not being choked or abused in any way at all! The ability of the bad guys to persistently damage my health *does* make my backers look bad and weak! Can't you do anything?? I can prove the Hodge conjecture, you guys apparently can't even send an email, whoever you are! I'm doing my part and more!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Probably, the appropriate setup by the people who did things right, like Dr. K, is: After my last post, the psychological atmosphere of the entire RVA area will change. Whenever any man in the community who isn't me looks at a woman in an area on her body that is near her neck, such as her face and her eyes, the woman will know exactly what he's thinking about, and the man and the woman will have an interesting, psychologically charged time studying each other facial expressions, to see, on some level, how OK with abuse the other person is. Does the man like choking and related things for controlling women? Do the women have a particular "kind of person" that they think it would be OK to have choked and abused? Does she think she's that type? Can her possibly nasty political beliefs and aversion to "moral right and wrong as determined by debate" be exploited to make her accept being abused herself?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > All of these disturbing questions, and more, will be contemplated by this evil local community and all the people who are residing here, except for me and Theresa (and Rosey), and I don't even know what city in VA Theresa lives in. Obviously, don't try messing with Theresa...that's the extent of your warning.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A quick amateur sketch profile of Joe Biden:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Very low attention to detail.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Always optimistic.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Not paranoid or vigilant about threats at all.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Believes in his own "sheer natural likability" as his main capability.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Believer in destiny, as claimed.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Hands off, un-strategic leader, except regarding grudges.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Very accepting of terrible outcomes of his allies.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Very focused on himself.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Things are coming along quite well. Quick break.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > *in a really deep, masculine, low-energy voice*: "Uhhh...yeah, Mrs. Obama, what did you say you wanted done again?"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It looks like all my macros have been sabotaged, so I will have to do the stock data grabs myself.. Oh well. The bad guys have been paying a steep price for this outrage, and will continue to do so...their losses will be devastating.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > In particular, every time the FBI fails to give me full service when I make a report on the internet about illegal cheating, it damages them greatly. They become seen as "risk promoters" throughout the economy; it is they who have set things up to ruin people financial lives, by refusing to prosecute "metaphorical loan theft" cases, leading to massively increasing interest rates and economic recession/depression.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The macros will not work; I am once again facing another handicap as an investor, which is illegal and unfair.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The joke is, the bad guys *still* think they can use "psychological mind manipulation" to somehow trick me into giving them free math. It is not going to work; apparently, even the shockingly crank-like Dr. Michael Sipser seems to actually believe in this sort of pseudoscience. You cannot mind control me into giving you free math, it is not possible.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Hey, Philip, rather than sit around getting choked by bots from foreigners, why not go apply to graduate school? You're SO good at research, I bet you would get into a really good school and have a happy life!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Uh, no, I'm aware of the trap. Why is the government suddenly claiming that, in light of the fact they think I'm a 'game theory pugilist,' that I *must* do the career that they choose for me? Why are all the exits blocked except STEM research publication? Even if I would consider it, and I wouldn't, I would rather spend 30 more years alone in captivity than serve fascists voluntarily, the bad guys would surely get me to solve all their favorite research problems, and then make up a reason to kick me out of grad school and make me become homeless. My only option is to fight and ruin my way out...there is no other way for me to have a happy life, sadly; I must fight and destroy bad-guy Americans' lives to optimize my outcome, no other option will improve my already quite damaged outcome."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I worked hard all day today, partly on tedious Excel work. Apparently, all macros and compilers are completely disabled.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I worked from this morning until just now. I am not quite down--there was a lot of tedious menial by-hand downloading and Excel work to do--but I ought to know how well my thing will work by tomorrow, hopefully anyway.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm going to stop and go eat, I might go the grocery store...I didn't get a chance to go to the mall. I will work tomorrow morning, and I have a doctor appointment too, so I might not wind up walking at the mall tomorrow either.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It is very inappropriate and illegal for all my of my professional activities to be blocked and lied about. I never did anything wrong at all, and have been massively smeared by lunatic bad guys. I demand a halt to this, again; I deserve to be treated properly, not enslaved, and given my Constitutional rights.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Oh, someone at the Walmart parking lot hinted that the State D fascist goons finally want to level with me. Wondrous. I received a signal that hinted my sister's internet activity might be being illegally monitored, maybe it's just another fake signal, I know how the State D girls love those by now.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I seem to be being invited to express some masculine, feisty anger again, too: OK, "Richarde, yes, a lot of people have brainstormed about how to wait for Harvard-Type Guy #799 to die before beginning hostilities against whomever, that's not your original idea, either."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (I was expressing frustration at Richard Dawkins, in case he is also, beneath the veneer of whatever, actually trying to murder me, for royals who want to murder him, but he knows that, but they don't *know* that he knows that, so you see, it is all a game of intrigue and ingeniousness, and Dawkins is on top. Whatever.)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, I'm done for the day...I got some groceries. I'm feeling fine right now, a little disappointed that I couldn't totally finish the Excel and stocks task today. I'll finish it tomorrow--I do have to build at least one VBA macro, so I'll do that and see if I can't get it all tested out tomorrow, maybe shortly after my doctor appointment. I probably won't make it to walk to the mall tomorrow, but I ought to make it the next day.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm probably only going to be able to trade about 4 times a day--another limitation/robbery by the US government and friends, I'll surely make money more slowly due to their illegal impairments, and they'll foreclosed upon, added to "risky and risk-contributor" watch lists, boycotted, sabotaged, stolen from without being repaid, etc.. Great, whatever. I should have been out over a year ago, people just love to be crazy and irrational these days, and they pay the price, and I never care to see their crestfallen faces or whatever, I'm focus on normal, virtuous people, and just trying to get out and have a life...the significant damage inflicted is there, whether denied or not (it doesn't matter)...I'm just focusing on my outcome, which has been dangled at a very high position to make it really hard for me to have a "basic happy normal life," so I'm just doing what would make sense and not be servile to win my freedom from the bad guys. I'm sure I'll make it eventually, it's just, how much more will they give up and throw away before they cry mercy? They are very enduring and very immune to crying about their losses, that's about the only "nice" thing you can say about the vietcong who took over the CIA.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So yeah...more work tomorrow, I'll think about my fiction and chess strategy tasks after the investing work is done, hopefully (I think it will work) by tomorrow. I'm cautiously optimistic it will still work...I'll find out tomrorow.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Basically, the CIA said: "OK, he's not 13, he's 36. The way it's gonna work is, he has to legally kill as many thousands of us as possible, as quickly as he can, without breaking the rules or giving up or helping us, or he can't have a date with a young woman until he's 37 or older."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > That's basically the setup.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It is a relief that, even though I plan to leave Virginia ASAP, the doctrine of "nurses will be nurses" is starting to be rejected in favor of patients' rights.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "What happened to the last guy with this job?"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > --a question probably not asked much internationally by people who operate drone/satellite harassment, or the people who give them direct orders, or the politicians who supervise and oversee them
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I.e., they're sitting ducks. Go for it, as Kristen once said. She doesn't mess with anyone, I'm pretty sure she won't be in any car crashes, and somehow, she seems to have gotten of here well before I did. I've been "pushing the pedal," driving away from Kroger and, ideally Tuckahoe, as fast as I can for over the past 2 years...and yet I am still here. I acknowledge that that is an impactful failure that is not good for my life satisfaction, but what else I can do? I cannot make the enemy be smart or interested in survival/self-preservation.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Uhh...they edited that, I said, "go for it, *push the pedal*, as Kristen once said. Kristen said, "push the pedal," not go for it. She also said her name was Kristen. I believe her. Maybe I shouldn't. Whatever. She was not a bad guy.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I took my meds about an hour late today. Right now, I am trying to write out some simple pseudocode for my macro task tomorrow.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I realized, based on a hinted communication from a veteran military person who was nice in the past, that probably, Quioccasin Blond actually is good. Excellent! I won't say anything flirty right now because I can't be sure, but yes, I'd be happy to get a date with Quioccasin Blond once this is all over...someone hinted to me outside tonight that it might be over in 9 days, maybe that's true.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just watched a little bit--not much--of Jennifer Shahade's interview. I saw her sort of looking up and to the left and to the right with her eyes in the interview.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I re-read my post about the sexual assault allegation. What I noticed was that it seemed like maybe she was sort of saying, "I appreciate / don't mind your perspective that much, but I think you are acting a bit partriarchy-linked regarding saying that crime victims, including sex assault victims, should not 'publicly flog' their defendants."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I hadn't mean to be condescending or trying to "use the fact that I'm male" to throw my weight around. I think she is disagreeing politely and not accusing me of anything. I saw my perspective as an articulation of my political beliefs, applied to one "case" that I've heard of. Come to think of it, I think life experiences are pretty much inextricable from political beliefs, at least in many cases. To me, "public flogging" and "appreciation of cessation of harm" are a big deal to me. I didn't intend anything hostile or resentful to Ms. Shahade or other sex assault victims, but if I had been trying inject a criticism, which I wasn't, I would have said, "It is probably very hard to come forward as a female sex assault victim to get help, but it is much much harder for men, at least including mentally ill men, to find a shoulder to cry on." I once saw a woman sitting down on the sidewalk on Quioccasin Road, looking sad and like she needed help. I felt certain that even though I am always ignored, she was going to have a man who found her pretty walk up to her and offer to help her with her problem within the hour...pretty young women can get that within 60 minutes, I cannot get that kind of help within 6 years...not even close.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think it is definitely true that crime victims ought to be allowed to speak freely about their feelings about the crime. I think the case could go either way regarding my claim about "public flogging" or "sadism"; if the person is not in jail, is the goal to get the person in jail? Does it deter future bad actions? I guess, deep down, what I was thinking without realizing it was, the *volume* of the criticisms are competitive. I see myself as having accepted, on grounds of realism, some extremely unusual things about how our society seems to actually work...e.g., a lot of people I knew in the past have literally no interest in getting in touch with me or each other, for no particular hostility-related reason, and I just learned to accept that, like, "Nobody says hi near the Metro outside of the train in DC," when I was young kid. So I guess I would say, the high volume of claims about sexual assault isn't exactly disappointing to me in an absolute sense, but maybe I agree that it is totally allowed, defensible, and acceptable to discuss one's own personal crime issue, after it has been "partially resolved" to the extent it can be...maybe I inadvertently resent literally everyone who is a victim of a crime who can rally some amount of support to their cause. Imagine an Iraqi civilian killed in a US bombing in 2006; he or she might have been stood up for as part of a bracket when Britney Spears sounded like she was saying "Iraq-fuls," like "Crackerfuls," the Ritz cheese snack (those were great, where did they go?), but other than that, everyone will be silent about whoever that person was in the US media for the next 10 years, almost for sure.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > You could see it as like a personality trait...my personality may have been altered. Maybe in 2010, I would said, "Yeah, women should totally speak up and talk incessantly if someone dares to sexually harass them--go for it, talk up a storm, never be quiet until you want to be"...I can still see that perspective as plausible, but my mentality is more jaded, at least right now, and "willing to accept cynical interpretations regarding how many people ever get justice," and inclined to see "a long line of crime victims who are metaphorically being helped by someone behind a desk, as though at the DMV, and some people are *able* to be shooed away from receiving the help and support, in my case after 0.00 seconds, and some people are better at staying at the front of the line to get more help from the assistant." It's the same thing I always saw when I would go shopping at the grocery store when younger; everyone would always answer my Mom when she approached strangers and started up a conversation...that has literally almost never worked for me, but I still give scathingly vicious reviews to grocery store workers who won't let go of the discrimination. Anyway, that's a big of a tangent...but there is a "mentally ill male" perspective, regarding "being treated as a chronic eye/presence-sore/whatever" wherever you go in public, and the mild resentment regarding the sort of unsympathetic perspectives of some women--I am not criticizing Shahade, I think she is well above average at caring about issues like mine, and I think she is thoughtful enough that she is quite helpful and smart about issues like mine--towards some mentally ill men who did not take the exit route of killing people or jumping off a cliff when the "legions of stalkers and vigilantes" came charging up to put the mentally ill men in terrible pain and new agony at very high levels that most people will never experience and that changes you like if you were a sword being re-made being put in a furnace, changed forever chemically (involuntarily as a person) while being subjected to very high temperatures without wanting to.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway I'm getting tired...I'll go grab something to eat and go to sleep soon. Overall I think Jennifer Shahade is fine, I'm just saying, I wasn't trying to be condescending...to use one of my metaphors, it's, "I'm a very intelligent and hard-working ex-Marine veteran with one leg wheeling myself around in a wheelchair, and I reflexively bristle, properly or not, at people who have high abilities, like 'rights' in a sense, like equal water fountain use rights, to speak out about assaults against them, that go well beyond mine." Maybe I am irrational. I could be wrong.. I am just identifying where my feelings that provoked a reaction must have come from.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A good lawyer hinted to me some time ago:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The secret deal that has been made regarding Congress having trafficked me is:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - If they stop trafficking me and saying "f--- off" to me completely, they get everything back that was seized, including poll numbers, immediately.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - The catch is, every time Congress says, "Oh, we're thinking about releasing him, let's consider it," and then they "deliberate" for some time, and then they back out and say "we decided we don't want to release him," the percentage of "everything" that they could back is decreased, due to a sort of "metaphorical burning' of assets that they could have gotten back.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - The deal never ends, just the "pot of gold" that Congress can get returned to them gets smaller and smaller, the more they gaslight everyone about why I am being held and when/if they are going to release me.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > If I interpreted that right, it sounds true!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just woke up. I am sad that, now at the age of 36, I have suffered a lot, and still never seen a vagina up close...I have barely ever had sex, and I'm approaching middle age. That is very disappointing to me.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'll get started on my tasks soon. I had a dream that I woke up today at 2 p.m., I don't know what that means.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Hopefully things will improve for me soon! It has been such a long wait for me to have a normal life, I'm glad I was supported enough to not die, but I wish I had been supported enough to not have to suffer as a slave for over 10 years! It's better than nothing, but really not by much. The arrangements made for me were not very good at all, and there doesn't seem to be much complaint about that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I saw a Tweet on Jennifer Shahade's page, saying, "how the f--- is this controversial." Chit-chat with the fort, tachyons fan?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe she is just passing the argument along...if I were really trying to secure my freedom, I would email my recruiter.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > As a matter of fact, I did that in 2011, after the FBI did not respond. I was ignored. Shortly thereafter, I was tortured by the robots. My email messages were fine, but as I later learned in my Privacy Act Request Response, my recruiter lied about me, filing fictitious reports with security personnel at NSA, prompting a lot of very strangely agreeable NSA people to respond enthusiastically and affirmingly to her false reports. One of them said, "[This] makes me miss special actions," i.e., in true lynch-mob form, some NSA people wanted me killed for emailing Brea Delaney, simply asking for help.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Indeed, I did not even email Debra Holtzclaw, the TexelTek security officer who had helped gaslight me when I worked there, but she also filed a fabricated complaint about me with other NSA security people, claiming that I had physically shown up to her house and turned off the gas at her residence. Not only do I not know where Debra Holtzclaw lives, I have not even successfully left the state of Virginia once since I returned here after being tortured in Joseph Schwartz's hospital. I tried to drive to Maryland on 09-11-2014 on a whim, to see if I could learn anything about what happened to me, but the government satellites/drones sabotaged my car while I was driving it, forcing me to get a tow truck and call my mother and return home.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, it is not a safe option for me to contact anyone at DOD. They would not respond, and retaliate, again, for the commuication effort.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > In case *you* would like to contact Brea Delaney to discuss, here are two email addresses to try (apparently she got promoted to "technical recruiter" according to the PARR, and her maiden name is DelCostello):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > bmd...@nsa.gov
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > bmd...@nsa.gov
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Warning: When I emailed her second email address, she said that I "shouldn't have known" (words to that effect) about that email. Also, she knows my social security number, and has repeated it to other NSA personnel in emails.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Let me write that out again, Google seems to think it outranks me in NSA power or something:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > bmdelco at nsa dot gov
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > bmdelan at nsa dot gov
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My technical interview or whatever, for the civilian position before my clearance was delayed and the position filled so I used my clearance when I got it to work for a contractor instead, was conducted by Paul Hermann; he might have retired, he was much older than Brea. I also interviewed with Stacy Bober, and there was another guy whose name I didn't catch.. I don't know Stacy Bober's middle initial...it might have been Stacey also, I don't know...but here is Paul Hermann's email, whether he still works there or not:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > pdherma at nsa dot gov
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > There are problematic issues with my ability to use VBA code in Excel. Some of the macro commands are not working right, it is the product of malware sabotage.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Regarding Shahade...I hope she supports me, and not the female perpetrator, Ivy Smith. I don't actually know if Smith is still accusing me of inappropriate behavior. My message, whether or not others had read it, contained almost no sexual content, a few delusional ideas that I expressed because I couldn't help it because I was mentally ill (I said, "I'm not sure if I'm September yet," regarding a horoscope-like note she had posted to her FB, which might have been about me, and maybe intended to gaslight me, I don't know for sure about that note), and nothing hostile or unfriendly. I had previously posted a note saying something negative about her, and how she had treated in the past...in October, I published a steganography note, which contained one reference to her and was mainly not about her. Her dog was named "Belle," as she had told me back when we were friends...I was posting a note that was mainly about typo steganography, and I thought, "Why don't I just use the idea I was describing in this note to say something to Ivy Smith, whom I had always liked?", and I mis-spelled the word "bell" as "belle," as a means to signal that I remember Ivy and would want to talk about her again. The note contained ideas relating to the idea of typo steganography and the idea of "not admitting that you're saying something in code" and using typos to communicate and signal knowledge of something, based on the assumption that you are saying something in code, which you could deny. FYI, I had stopped medications, with doctor permission and guidance, that month, in October also, a little bit before...I wasn't that mentally ill yet. There was nothing hostile or vicious or sexual or harassing or inappropriate about anything I said; I did start losing my mind more as I was increasingly followed around campus and stego-signalled and gaslighted by other students, and eventually professors, especially CS professors...one professor appeared to be quoting from an IM I had sent to Ms. Smith when talking about me withdrawing from his class. My interests were not vicious, not related to rape, and intended to be friendly and interested in talking to Ms.. Smith again. I was not interested in rape or violence, although admittedly, after I was psychologically assaulted a lot, I daydreamed about violence against some people who were hurting me, but I never planned to actually strike back, and I sought help repeatedly, including asking other students if they thought I should go to a hospital, and they just brushed me off and didn't want to get involved in helping me. My initial note, in October, was not very strange, and I just looked shy, not aggressive. I don't know who started the "f--- Philip White" wave after that--I had been working on the discrete logarithm problem all summer, and my expressed approach to the problem, based on "binary construction" and a statistical test and properties of logarithms, was good enough that many number theorists could have completed the solution, but I hadn't realized that myself yet...but basically, I had no idea what was going on, and didn't understand why people started stalking and signaling me around campus. Someone--Billy Ella--got me into steganography by mentioning it, and that he was interested in doing some sort of steganography research...he was a math/CS major too, I got interested in stego ideas myself after that. Maybe it was his exact plot to try to kill me, he was willing to talk to me in the past, but was not all threat friendly and admitted as much one time when I chatted with him on AIM after I had graduated.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said "talk to her again," I'm sick of being sabotaged by *actual* criminal terrorists, I am not such a person myself, truly. It's supposed to be freaky Friday...the terrorists run the government, and the real IC workers get labeled as terrorists and hunted for years, without being "negotiated with."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So yes, I cannot proceed with the stocks program now, because my Excel is hacked...too bad for me for now, I guess.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I wonder: If this went far enough, e.g., if two months later, after my innocence was fully investigated and established, again, would Jennifer Shahade finally, "OK, enough is enough, this has gone too far for this poor guy...I am going to make an exception to my policy and actually reach out to him and email him and help him get out of this mess, since no one else will be reasonable or talk to him about what the bad guys are saying. He deserves fair treatment and has had enough; I will speak to him if no one else will."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I would think that a good leader, anywhere, would do that for me within a month at this point. That is my opinion.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, even if I *had* said something inappropriate--sexual or aggressive or threatening--wouldn't most reasonable people agree that I should "get a free pass" since it would have just been ramblings of someone who was very sick and needed help, not something to be condemned, because it didn't physically hurt anyone and was just the product of an illness? It's like if someone were drugged with PCP and wasn't acting like themselves for a few weeks, until they got treatment. Surely no one believes that there should be no support for mental health treatment for mentally ill people?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > In my case, that isn't even what happened...I actually didn't cross the line at all, even off meds--my behavior was close to perfect, especially with regard to Ms. Smith. But if it had happened, in someone else's case, mental health should come into consideration. People should not be auto-condemned for being sick. If they were , then people would start auto-condemning people for being biologically different in the sense of being female, and a lot of people would not enjoy that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm going to have change my schedule around today...I'll walk at the mall at around 2. I won't do the "attack prose" today, I'll do it tomorrow. I'll probably spend today doing more chess-related strategy, should be fun.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A lawyer hinted to me in the past: The consequence of this is being seen by Congressional leaders as, "Oh well, we've lost this around." The hinted claim was, Congress is literally completely done at ever getting any big legislation passed, ever again...in the future, all Congressional legislators will get nothing significant done at all, not just Dave Brat.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway...I guess it's back to relaxing and chess for me. I might do a little more fiction reading.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I hope that my innocence at whatever they're saying I did is established soon...if it isn't, it's going to be clear, as it already is clear to some degree, that Americans are fond of "gladiator sadism" against people that they don't find "very entertaining/beautiful"; it looks Americans like punishing and torturing "fake criminals," with no regard for the facts at all. In some cases, there is no fact or disclosure or revision/correction to the story, clarifying more what actually happened, about whatever fake leaking or stalking incident I'm claimed to have been involved with as a perpetrator, that would change anyone's mind. They don't actually *care* if I'm guilty of anything, and it's not about justice or right or wrong, it's about power, evil, sadism, getting one's way, and slavery. Justice, honor, and the truth have nothing to do with it, for them.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > *lost this round.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK, I have a doctor appointment at 4, so I decided to just wait and stay home and work on chess strategy. I'll prepare my attack fiction, and hopefully also publish it on Usenet, tomorrow.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Hmmm...I just now thought to look up the definition of "crank," I had thought it meant "someone who believes in pseudo-science":
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (2)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > : an annoyingly eccentric person
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > also : one who is overly enthusiastic about a particular subject or activity
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > FYI, just in case, the "What do you personally in your mind think I seem like or remind you of?" game is not productive, and not part of a serious argument about crime and punishment.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I realized something, based on a tip from the past, while playing chess: The doctors who are working with me are claiming that, after all these years of abuse and just criticisms, that there is "still something wrong with how I act," and that I have some more "health improvement and growing up to do." That is absurd, but I am not in a position to protest myself against medical care...apparently, aside from Dr. K and Dr. Steg in the past, the doctors have not "signed off the idea that I'm ready to talk and work yet," they seem to have some "peculiar flavor of person that they would I be and/or remind them of," and I think it has to do with ideals about "humility" and "knowing my place," as though as an American citizen with a mental health condition, I am automatically "somewhere down low in the chain of command in a US military of sorts," and I must "learn to start doing things the doctors' way," or I must not be allowed to speak, date, or work, or make money at all. They want me excluded from society until I "measure up to their secret standards of behavior."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Again, I don't think Dr. K or Dr. Steg were a part of it, it's an extremely vicious and brutal, highly political move against me. I am grateful for the tip from years ago...and it is helping my chess too!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > *unjust
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > In case you are into art and interested in art theory, maybe much more knowledgeable than I am about fiction: I am opposed to the idea, philosophically, of "character-driven fiction." All characters, typically, in a novel are human, and what matters is their talents, choices, and successful/unsuccessful endeavors, not "a peculiar trait-smell of a particular character, presented to the world in prose, who needs to be judged by you, the reader, with all sorts of details an innuendo about everything right and wrong with the character and the world, and how those two things and what's going on with them these days are related." Fiction is about plot and interesting stories, and personal acts of courage and other nouns, it ought not to be a "discrimination lab."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It is unacceptable for every nasty thing that is done to me to be characterized as "part of involuntary mental health treatment because I'm oh-so-crazy because you said so because I express politically-related anger," and/or "a delusion." We are now at a point, in our society, where anyone can walk up to a mentally ill person and punch him/her in the face and steal their wallet, and law enforcement will not help, because the crime will be claimed to be "a delusion," essentially always. The FBI itself has failed, completely, as a viable government agency due to this outrageous mentality.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FArZxLj6DLk
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Oh, I just figured it out! All along, he was saying, "Philip, don't offend cats when you rap."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It's about triangulation. I also found a connection between this and the dance in Jimmy Fallon performance of "My Oh My" or however that's ordered on Jimmy Fallon's show. I'm off music for now though, mostly anyway.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Let's crunch the code: FOTCMOMHVRJF. OK: MOM, HOV[E]R [with] JCT, FF.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Ah, it's about the NSA, the CIA, and this YouTube video...it's like a woman-focused re-write request, fascinating:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FFKNfV2nf8A
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ...uh, guys...guys...they removed the clip I was talking about. It's the part where the guy said, "Dad, {I'm going to be a, don't be a} cryptozoologist." It was there, it was the guy...wait I just watched it again, it's back.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > False alarm.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, I realized something today, based on a hint from another patient at Tucker Psych...it seems like, at this point, anyone would totally be able to talk to me without any kind of hindrance from the government. I believe that the mechanics of how it works is, all of the bad guys have been identified and put under surveillance, probably by drug companies and other NAMI/disabled-lobby allies, with airplanes. Basically, all they need to do to put an ongoing law-breaker under surveillance is: 1) Prepare the legal justification with a good lawyer and send that justification to the FBI, perhaps via email to one of their field offices, 2) Purchase a high-flying airplane with infrared, fans hardware, and appropriate and safe/risk-free software developed by good engineers, 3) Have a few other devices, such as a small hidden camera, available on the ground to be moved around by the planes to keep all law-breaking targets under constant 24/7 surveillance, round the clock, by private companies and organizations that are legally allowed to do so, without interference by the FBI because their actions would not be illegal. So all of the bad guys have surely been completely halted and are completely under surveillance, it is totally safe to talk to me now...all the bad guys are totally hacked and under constant surveillance, they can't do anything any more, even if you are identified talking to me.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, that would suggest that at this point, I'm *definitely* only being hit by foreign satellites and fighter jets, with permission directly from Joseph R. Biden, who might be immune to being surveilled under the Constitution because he is the President.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So if you're feeling scared of foreign satellites or whatever, and you've heard of me, why not talk to me??
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe in light of that, I should not publish my attack fiction after all.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > At this point, I'm basically "heads up" against Joe Biden. Biden makes deals with pawns, whom he quickly discards when they act like they are "physics labs that don't want to hire Stephen Hawking," and as it turns out, no one is successfully bothering me or preventing me from working in this country, except for maybe some past-tense software saboteurs who are done acting, except for Biden himself and his foreign comrades.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > What should I do now?? Am I the only one in this position? It is literally just one person, an unpopular failure US President, personally using his persuasive powers and media platform to prevent me from socializing, working, or making money. I guess the media is also complicit for not running the story...one question is, why doesn't a lawyer who would like to help with this case get in touch with me? I don't know which lawyer to contact. Surely some lawyers have read this...why aren't you emailing me to help?? I literally cured cancer, aren't there supposed to be ambulance chasers out there looking to make some money? Helping me get rid of JRB as a stalker would be a good career advertisement, too.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Somehow, I suspect I won't hear from any lawyers or anyone else for a while...I don't know why not? Once again, what the heck is this? I'm perfectly ready and able to talk.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My sense of it is, there's another wave of bad guys that is about to get caught and put under surveillance by drug companies, eager to do research on people who are evil and very easy and fairly cheap to watch, completely nude if necessary, 24/7, for their experiments. They will probably never even be notified.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I saw a girl who looked like she was visually impaired who was brought by someone who looked like her mother to Deep Run Park often in the past. I was concerned that the mother was bringing her daughter, if she was that, to an unsafe place, when she is not an adult and does not really need to be there with her Mom. I stopped walking at Deep Run Park, and then the mother and daughter showed up to the mall. I did feel some sympathy and concern for the girl...was she being groomed to be treated like me in the future??...and I nodded acknowledgment to the mother-looking person, and then I saw them again on the other side of the mall, and it seemed like the mother-person was imitating a different, higher-pitched voice, like she was trying to pretend that the younger girl was talking, maybe to get my attention and get me to look up, and I realized she probably knows who I am and is following me around with her probably disabled daughter to look for locals who might be interested in bothering her daughter...I hope the girl gets help.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It occurred to me that maybe the nurse practitioner isn't bad...it's just, I am targeted by satellites, and no one in the community feels like talking to me, and no firms say no to Biden and choose to hire me. She didn't explicitly say, "You're not healthy enough to socialize."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, btw, in case anyone has questions about the VT massacre...it is pretty clear that likely Taiwanese poster "wij" is quite closely linked to the masterminds of the attack, who weaponized the on-the-ground mentally ill perpetrator Cho, and compelled him with psychological pain and satellite/fighter-jet action to shoot 32 other students at VT and then himself If you're looking for answers, that's probably why the international community agreed to put this freak out here--to answer your questions about why he killed all those people.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think the thing about this area is, people who are happy here and not trying to move out are "very big Spanberger fans," whether they know that she didn't actually work for the CIA or not. So yeah, I think people who are mentally ill should try to get jobs in other areas if at all possible...this is not a good place to live if you are mentally ill, even though some listing that mentions "the best places for mental health treatment" says that RVA is one of the best, that is clearly wrong.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, regarding myself...I'm about to take my meds, and since I'm not doing fiction and can't do STEM for money or serious investing at all, I'm going to probably spend tomorrow doing some chess strategy. My new batch of ideas about chess is coming along, I have many different "philosophical takes" on chess.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > By the way, here is a comment about "where I go the idea to be a little bit healthily paranoid from"...it was Dr. More in her cryptology class. She mentioned a number of very important things before I withdrew; I didn't understand how much thought and science and strategy, including individualized education for specific students, can be done. I very much oppose Dr. Mellinger, Dr. Helmstutler, and Dr. K politically, but they and Dr. Edmunds are indeed very talented educators, there is not denying that, and I did learn from them. I think they are bad people who supported letting me get attacked and they did not warn me--I could be wrong, I am least suspicious of Dr. Edmunds, whom I was sometimes rude to improperly as an undergrad--but they do know how to teach math well and I did learn from them.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I was thinking about: What advice would I give to people who want to get good at math? I wouldn't share everything I know at all..mainly I would say:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Start when you're young; 2 or 3 is a good age to see if you want to get started at math, I think...but don't tell yourself you're too late if you're older.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Make sure you really like it.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Try to be philosophical about it and maybe hold debates about it, or, if you don't like philosophy, find another "secondary lens" to help you dig deeper into the subject.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Expect to be surprised and to have to rely on "raw talent," i.e., to focus a lot not on "math (self-)education doctrine," but instead on doing and/or thinking about a lot of math (and hopefully really enjoying as you do it), and try to keep pushing yourself harder, which will be easier if you enjoy making progress. Expect to not always understand *why* you are getting better or having really good ideas about it.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - A good idea for a favorite word if you want to apply math to real-world challenges: "lenses." Never tell yourself you've found the *last* application of an interesting mathematical theorem.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Don't burn out and ruin your life...if you can make good plans, have a good time management system for helping your invest your time in math and other activities intelligently.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Do consider "letting yourself be paranoid," i.e., don't afraid to think too hard or consider "appropriate/ethical yet widely disbelieved ideas." The key word is *consider*...you can accept some wild assumptions in an alternate world if you can do it healthily and admit you might be wrong.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Don't be afraid to be quirky...being an unusual thinker seems to have aided my math talent.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Don't let people exploit your talent...if you get hurt for sharing math ideas, be willing to cut off some particular type of "math sharing" (I have cut off sharing original research), if you are abused or targeted for your gift that you share with others....you can still converse, but be strict about "a line that must not be crossed" for you to continue being maximally generous and service-y to the world.. If people don't respect you enough, they lose access to your STEM gifts, that's one way to protect yourself from endless abuse as a STEM whiz.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said, "to start," not "to see."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I notice that I prefer to write on Google Groups because I am more likely to write as though others will read what I'm writing, and it'll make me want to re-read it more later.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I had chess scheduled for tomorrow, but I'm feeling burned out and ought to do something else instead. I don't know what to do.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, regarding the loans argument...I am *not* taking out a loan from my highly abusive parents. I am accepting, under duress because I had to, the idea that I will live here, and my parents have at least temporarily ceased abusing me, completely actually, which is great and a first for them while near me, the idea that instead of paying me a $300 million lawsuit for lost wages, based on their devious arrangement to prevent me from making money with my excellent math talent through a good career for over 10 years, I am allowed to live here and get money for food. I am really not demanding at all; it is my parents who owe me for having sabotaged my life and finances, not the other way around.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I decided that I am going to compose and publish my attack prose after all...the duress is still relevant, I don't think all the bad guys are surveilled by private companies after all. That will be my main task for today.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Ookay...the freaky Philip-White-obsessed hate-spirituality continues to spill itself out all over the RVA area, wondrous.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I have decided that for now, I am focused exclusively on working to promote my own enjoyment of life. I will not compose or share the fiction I was going to write, I might do it tomorrow, or some other time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw...is it claimed that I leaked the SDI, and fabricated the incidents about being harassed with it? You do realize that the NSA has cameras at many/all of their facilities, and that as an agency, NSA is keenly aware of all information I accessed at their facilities. I had a classified account but never logged into it; literally every piece of information on "the high side" as the NSA calls the classified parts of their facilities that was shared with me was done so via Chris McCubbin, who was physically present with me at all times at all NSA facilities I went to. I did visit an SAIC SCIF with Joe van Oosterhout one time; he shared information, but did not share any information about anything classified. JV harassed me; CM did not. I obtained no unauthorized access to any information, and leaked nothing. I was not given any access to SDI-related information, and I didn't know it existed, and the NSA knows it. AFAIK, the SDI is not even an American capability. Thus, I am innocent of that charge, also, if that is the lie that has been made about me. I didn't have a physics degree, and didn't even know classical mechanics back then; why would the NSA have told me about physics-related techs they had? Further, if I had somehow obtained information of that nature, it would have been authorized because I would not have needed to know, and I would have been arrested very quickly before quitting DRC. Thus, it is proved, again, that I leaked nothing.. Leave me alone, liars and hate pawns.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I might do some chess strategy today.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > * it would not have been authorized
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also: If the NSA had wanted an algorithm from me to help with the SDI, they would have asked without telling me what the problem is. Indeed, many low-side conversations at the TexelTek facility (which did not have a SCIF AFAIK) involved "talking around classified information," i.e., problems would be presented without the true intended application of the stated problem. If someone had wanted help regarding an SDI-related algorithm--maybe they did??--they would have asked me about a mathematical formalism, and not tell me anything about what the use of the idea would be. I was a math/CS person, with some talent at abstract algebra--I might be mis-directing you--not a physicist. They would never tell me about that, and I find it *very upsetting* that the NSA itself refuses to point that out. I helped them, and they tossed me to the wolves, for being disabled. They could have gotten me out of trouble with one sentence stated, but apparently, they want me to suffer and then eventually "do the debate myself," and I guess that's how US lawyers feel, too. *I* have to investigate and debate and ask questions to secure my freedom and prove my innocence, even without a trial, no one else will do the work to do that for me.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > A clear observation that I think is very true: A lot of neurotypical people think that if they are at some point in the future caught having been "very harmfully delusional" about something, perhaps including something about "someone deserving all the worst treatment," perhaps even "someone deserving to be killed," that, because they were neurotypical and not bipolar or schizophrenic, that they will get *much gentler* treatment than someone like Jared Loughner would, even if they wind up, through their confusion and illegal activities, killing many more innocent people based on their incorrect duress argument than Loughner did. I think they will find themselves to be wrong; the mentally ill are closer to have an *excuse,* based on science, than average jerks who want to kill people as a fun and engaging political activity and say it's all legal, falsely.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Internationally, all of the "neurotypical Jared Loughners" who just truly, truly believed that I was guilty, and in lethal, illegal, and very harmful/destructive ways, *must* be held accountable, including in the "loans, risk-analysis, debts, and harm-to-market" sense to an extent much greater than Loughner. Indeed, if such people in the US and internationally are *not* held accountable for what they've done to the same extent that Loughner was, then all of them owe both *him*, and the victims of his crimes, and *me*, more than Loughner owes the US government in jailtime, due to the fact that Loughner and his victims have been forced to exist in a more imperfect and opaque justice system. I claim: If the prediction of the "wild neurotypical unchecked, un-arrested neurotypical-passing Loughners" running around killing people while delusional and acting strange without being punished had not already been made and plugged into the system by forecasters, Loughner would have been, based on the altered mechanics of the system, stopped by the police and prevented from killing anyone. So it largely their forecasted unchecked behavior that is the most to blame for Loughner's crimes, more so than his own confused actions while not getting help for his medical condition.
> > > > > > > > > > > > * and behaved
> > > > > > > > > > > The mechanism of how I am contained:
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > A lot of people have invested a lot of time in effort in weaving a false "riskiness and damaging nature" narrative about me. People have made up lies, especially ones that they will not precent to me for rebuttal, to claim that "if you are seen with me being nice to me, you are spending time with someone you should not be seen with, because he is a very damaging, risky person who has done awful things to various economic markets." The case is based on lies, and Biden is the real risk guy, but he has the platform and the connections, so he has delegated dozens of liars to go out and weave fabrications about me to make sure that if anyone tries to befriend me, they'll get seen as "very risky and damaging to be around," too.
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > The lies machine is itself, in reality, actually very very damaging to all sorts of different markets, including European safety and security and American banks and low-income workers. Biden is desperate to stay in control of the persuasive lies machine, to get immature people to run around convincing other immature people to believe and propagate lies and pull the wool over each others' eyes, so that he can escape being fully blamed for all the catastrophes he has caused...he wants to be the "ghost debt ower," who owes all the money and doesn't pay it, increasing risk and insecurity and damage greatly within the relevant markets, but "lying his way out of culpability"--he wants other people, including well-known people, to take the blame instead of him. That's his startup--"Lying to Americans Very Effectively, Inc."--and if it works, everyone who uses the startup as a customer gets hurt, and he improves his reputational outcome and gets "free hurt opportunities" against all sorts of people, from Obama to me to his worst enemies to his greatest backers whom he thinks won't go far enough for him to some of his friends.
> > > > > > > > > > "Think fast, Jareds."
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Remember my post on my (now deleted) blog about early adopters? What do you think you should do, right or as soon as humanly possible? Anything about what you're doing or what your current claimed role is that you might want to change?
> > > > > > > > > * right now
> > > > > > > > Something I realized from a tip from the past: I need to *never* be positively judgmental in public, ever again. Whenever I give someone a "good review," it *always* comes back to haunt me and I wind up being isolated. I guess I was not meant to be a critic. I might stumble with that, but in the future, I will not give out any good reviews to anyone who does anything or has any interaction with me. I also formally retract all good reviews of everything and everyone I've ever commented about, in public and elsewhere, with this post. I think that will help me, the tip was good.
> > > > > > > I think indeed, the mechanics of the good review and its aftermath tend to be:
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > "OK, yeah, I agree that he's really difficult...OK I just got the review, let's go, pull the plug on his support and try to screw him over again, just like last time, this is going to work out great for me, I got the good review from him, I'll be reimbursed for that handsomely."
> > > > > > Also, since I will not have anything to do with academic publishing in the future, I will not ever cite anyone for anything, ever again.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > I am also unlikely to ever publish a novel...I will probably just publish short fiction.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > I can't imagine that I will ever need money again. My parents are giving me money for now. It looks like, if I ever get liberated, I will be able to immediately predict the stock market with my math ideas...so unless I have a job I would really want to do, I will probably never work or have a job again, outside of the stock market.
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Basically, I am ready to retire. I'm done doing all service, and done being employed...I'll likely do chess, investing, writing short fiction, exercise, and maybe boxing whenever the bad guys have had enough and the satellites are pointed elsewhere. I will never air public praise for anyone ever again, I promise. If I accidentally say something praising someone else, please disregard it and don't count it as a "serious good review." My good reviews have only gotten me into trouble, and now I am exploited for good reviews, almost constantly, so indeed, I must stop completely.
> > > > > Yeah I'll respond:
> > > > >
> > > > > "I don't have a job, and now no longer need one. I don't owe you anything, you do owe me something. You have conducted yourselves as homicidal fascists, openly, and owe it to me *at least* to force Joe Biden to remove satellite access to me, end the malware assaults against me, stop smearing me, and leave me alone completely. Failure to comply by the end of March--you're getting a new deadline--will lead to 20 years of unceasing assaults against the US economy and national interests, by me, no backing down no matter what. Make your choice carefully, you ought to bring up your grade at investing and cut your losses. I can basically do this forever, unless of course you actually do succeed at murdering me. Do you want this to stop or do you want this to continue? It shouldn't be your choice, but it is. I am not breaking the laws, but I am *very hostile* to you and not ashamed of that at all. All you would have to do is leave me alone by the end of March, can you do that, can you think of a better response?"
> > > > The logic is, I understand the intransigent and evil US government enemy that has been hunting me for years. I am literally, factually, unequivocally innocent; I did nothing wrong and was helping them. They decided to kill me no matter what; I know that to have been illegal and very morally wrong. They murdered 3 more people in my family. Now, as a consequence of their hunting, I very properly *despise* them and want to damage their interests. I would not have despised them if they had hunted me.
> > > >
> > > > I already tried to pay the ransom, and they still wouldn't let me go. It looks like, they are determined to kill me no matter what, and hold me illegally in a cage. I might be here for the next 50 years, it's not my fault, there is nothing I could have done differently. At this point, the only thing I can do, as a "surviving Jew-type person in an ongoing attempted holocaust" is, threaten to strike back as hard as I can. If I played nice, they would not release me...that was investigated. I won't break rules; that wouldn't help me. If I can do enough damage to my persecutors, who refuse to even negotiate or speak honestly or at all with me, I *might* decrease the probability that I will still be here in 2 months. I also might not. It is my best bet, why would anyone criticize for doing the exact same thing that you would do in my situation, except that I don't break laws and I am fair? Don't you see that slavery doesn't pay yet? I will fight forever for my excellent values and positive vision of America if I must. Don't you want to stop doing the wrong thing and stop paying the high price I've imposed for it? Do you think I shouldn't be allowed to do that??? You already know that you're morally wrong, now you are learning that you are politically mostly powerless, and your problem is getting worse and worse because you won't stop with me. Why doesn't that make you want to stop? I will hurt you more, whether you deny it or not. I just want my freedom and my rights. I never did anything wrong, I followed all the rules, I fought fair and only tried to get what I deserved, nothing more. You've hired smear-cheerleaders to wave their pom-poms and say that I deserve this, based on a *totally fabricated* version of reality, that you won't even share with me to let me correct your lies. You started out being un-American, soon you will be total failures.
> > > >
> > > > Want to stop? What's that, no, you want to see where we are in 4 months? OK, we will see that, for sure, if you don't, and you probably won't, knowing you VC-types!
> > > * if they had not hunted me
> > I think the pretty clear comment is, 99% of the people who are attacking me do not understand what a *war* is, and that is particularly true of Petraeus and Obama types.
> It's kind of like Joe Biden is running a restaurant, and some of the diners are on the menu.
>
> The problem is, there are people interested in being copy cats.

On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 6:30:44 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 6:20:29 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 5:11:40 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 5:07:12 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 5:05:25 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 4:53:30 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 3:36:13 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 3:17:29 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 3:15:53 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 2:57:32 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 2:57:00 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 2:45:48 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 2:11:11 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 2:10:43 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 1:57:20 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 1:37:11 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 1:30:19 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 1:27:08 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, March 18, 2023 at 11:42:28 AM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 11:01:25 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 10:25:05 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 10:13:46 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 10:01:46 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 8:43:49 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 8:37:42 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 8:33:35 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 8:31:34 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 8:26:08 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 8:21:26 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 8:07:36 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 8:03:20 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 7:03:07 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 6:57:22 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 6:54:34 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 6:54:01 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 2:39:51 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 1:57:39 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 1:52:41 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 1:33:10 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 1:32:46 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 1:23:19 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 1:17:20 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 1:14:43 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 1:08:07 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 12:33:17 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 11:35:26 AM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 11:33:05 AM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 11:32:04 AM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 11:25:41 AM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 10:33:43 AM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 1:17:18 AM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, March 17, 2023 at 12:11:33 AM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 11:05:54 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 10:19:48 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 10:11:16 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 10:09:31 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 9:43:38 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 9:24:32 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 9:23:18 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 9:14:36 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 7:49:10 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 6:54:31 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 4:57:19 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 4:09:15 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 4:07:48 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 3:10:28 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 1:13:31 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 12:45:10 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 12:37:54 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 12:16:57 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 12:02:41 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Thursday, March 16, 2023 at 12:02:09 PM UTC-4, Philip White wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Here is what I had remembered to paste:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK, enough pushing back against bad guys for now. Yes, I still feel the glare of irrational lunatics and their backers, demanding that their wacky version of reality be breathed in and studied, and *discerned* without even being seated clearly...they want to debate on "easy mode," where they don't have to speak, the truth is merely *divined* from their hints. I have to take it into account, and yeah, the apathy about me winning the debate repeatedly and getting nothing sufficient out of it is unnerving. Whatever.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I am about get up and shower and eat and get dressed. I'll start my stocks work right after that. I'll probably do it in two phases, take a 30 min break, and then test it out and leave for a walk after I'm fully done. If it looks good enough, I might do a few trades tomorrow, and then get started in earnest the next day. My starting amount of money is just $300. We'll see what I can do!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said "stated," not "seated."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > !!! The bad guys had the bot choke me again just now, while I was eating. That is uncomfortable and stressful, and negatively impactful to my psychological health. It is also a clear green-light--I'm still under duress--to publish my attack fiction, sometime soon. I'm starting with the stock market today, but I will begin the attack prose composition probably within the next week sometime, maybe over the weekend.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Does my nurse practitioner, Robin Jones, object to this behavior directed against me? Does she and Tucker Psychiatric have anything to say about this, and how it affects my health, and how inappropriate it is???
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 1 - It sounds like the bad guys, and the CIA green-lighters, are recommending to RVA men that they "try choking" on women that they go on dates with--they are advertising it as an abusive technique that works. It sounds like maybe Gloria Allred will be getting an influx of lucrative new clients soon, maybe she likes that and doesn't mind.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 2 - Are my doctors serious about focusing on my health?? This didn't happen with Dr. K. Is the focus on "helping out wealthy people who have said that they dislike me" to achieve their mental-patient-related goals, or is the focus on helping me with my condition? I had to stop seeing Dr. Wein because he was so egregiously on the wrong side of that line. I'll get my congestion cured someday by a real doctor, though.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > 3 - Part of the purpose of the timed choking attacks is, based on the fact that choking is air-depriving, psychological, visceral, and biological in ways that I and most other people have never studied, it is supposed to condition me to alter my behavior and mood, and to make me stop doing certain things that the bad guys want me to stop doing. I can't know exactly what, but I'll stick to my core projects for now. I would really prefer not being choked or abused in any way at all! The ability of the bad guys to persistently damage my health *does* make my backers look bad and weak! Can't you do anything?? I can prove the Hodge conjecture, you guys apparently can't even send an email, whoever you are! I'm doing my part and more!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Probably, the appropriate setup by the people who did things right, like Dr. K, is: After my last post, the psychological atmosphere of the entire RVA area will change. Whenever any man in the community who isn't me looks at a woman in an area on her body that is near her neck, such as her face and her eyes, the woman will know exactly what he's thinking about, and the man and the woman will have an interesting, psychologically charged time studying each other facial expressions, to see, on some level, how OK with abuse the other person is. Does the man like choking and related things for controlling women? Do the women have a particular "kind of person" that they think it would be OK to have choked and abused? Does she think she's that type? Can her possibly nasty political beliefs and aversion to "moral right and wrong as determined by debate" be exploited to make her accept being abused herself?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > All of these disturbing questions, and more, will be contemplated by this evil local community and all the people who are residing here, except for me and Theresa (and Rosey), and I don't even know what city in VA Theresa lives in. Obviously, don't try messing with Theresa...that's the extent of your warning.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A quick amateur sketch profile of Joe Biden:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Very low attention to detail.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Always optimistic.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Not paranoid or vigilant about threats at all.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Believes in his own "sheer natural likability" as his main capability.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Believer in destiny, as claimed.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Hands off, un-strategic leader, except regarding grudges.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Very accepting of terrible outcomes of his allies.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Very focused on himself.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Things are coming along quite well. Quick break.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > *in a really deep, masculine, low-energy voice*: "Uhhh...yeah, Mrs. Obama, what did you say you wanted done again?"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It looks like all my macros have been sabotaged, so I will have to do the stock data grabs myself. Oh well. The bad guys have been paying a steep price for this outrage, and will continue to do so...their losses will be devastating.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > In particular, every time the FBI fails to give me full service when I make a report on the internet about illegal cheating, it damages them greatly. They become seen as "risk promoters" throughout the economy; it is they who have set things up to ruin people financial lives, by refusing to prosecute "metaphorical loan theft" cases, leading to massively increasing interest rates and economic recession/depression.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The macros will not work; I am once again facing another handicap as an investor, which is illegal and unfair.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The joke is, the bad guys *still* think they can use "psychological mind manipulation" to somehow trick me into giving them free math. It is not going to work; apparently, even the shockingly crank-like Dr. Michael Sipser seems to actually believe in this sort of pseudoscience. You cannot mind control me into giving you free math, it is not possible.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Hey, Philip, rather than sit around getting choked by bots from foreigners, why not go apply to graduate school? You're SO good at research, I bet you would get into a really good school and have a happy life!"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "Uh, no, I'm aware of the trap. Why is the government suddenly claiming that, in light of the fact they think I'm a 'game theory pugilist,' that I *must* do the career that they choose for me? Why are all the exits blocked except STEM research publication? Even if I would consider it, and I wouldn't, I would rather spend 30 more years alone in captivity than serve fascists voluntarily, the bad guys would surely get me to solve all their favorite research problems, and then make up a reason to kick me out of grad school and make me become homeless. My only option is to fight and ruin my way out...there is no other way for me to have a happy life, sadly; I must fight and destroy bad-guy Americans' lives to optimize my outcome, no other option will improve my already quite damaged outcome."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I worked hard all day today, partly on tedious Excel work. Apparently, all macros and compilers are completely disabled.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I worked from this morning until just now. I am not quite down--there was a lot of tedious menial by-hand downloading and Excel work to do--but I ought to know how well my thing will work by tomorrow, hopefully anyway.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm going to stop and go eat, I might go the grocery store...I didn't get a chance to go to the mall. I will work tomorrow morning, and I have a doctor appointment too, so I might not wind up walking at the mall tomorrow either.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It is very inappropriate and illegal for all my of my professional activities to be blocked and lied about. I never did anything wrong at all, and have been massively smeared by lunatic bad guys. I demand a halt to this, again; I deserve to be treated properly, not enslaved, and given my Constitutional rights.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Oh, someone at the Walmart parking lot hinted that the State D fascist goons finally want to level with me. Wondrous. I received a signal that hinted my sister's internet activity might be being illegally monitored, maybe it's just another fake signal, I know how the State D girls love those by now.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I seem to be being invited to express some masculine, feisty anger again, too: OK, "Richarde, yes, a lot of people have brainstormed about how to wait for Harvard-Type Guy #799 to die before beginning hostilities against whomever, that's not your original idea, either."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (I was expressing frustration at Richard Dawkins, in case he is also, beneath the veneer of whatever, actually trying to murder me, for royals who want to murder him, but he knows that, but they don't *know* that he knows that, so you see, it is all a game of intrigue and ingeniousness, and Dawkins is on top. Whatever.)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, I'm done for the day...I got some groceries. I'm feeling fine right now, a little disappointed that I couldn't totally finish the Excel and stocks task today. I'll finish it tomorrow--I do have to build at least one VBA macro, so I'll do that and see if I can't get it all tested out tomorrow, maybe shortly after my doctor appointment. I probably won't make it to walk to the mall tomorrow, but I ought to make it the next day.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm probably only going to be able to trade about 4 times a day--another limitation/robbery by the US government and friends, I'll surely make money more slowly due to their illegal impairments, and they'll foreclosed upon, added to "risky and risk-contributor" watch lists, boycotted, sabotaged, stolen from without being repaid, etc. Great, whatever. I should have been out over a year ago, people just love to be crazy and irrational these days, and they pay the price, and I never care to see their crestfallen faces or whatever, I'm focus on normal, virtuous people, and just trying to get out and have a life...the significant damage inflicted is there, whether denied or not (it doesn't matter)...I'm just focusing on my outcome, which has been dangled at a very high position to make it really hard for me to have a "basic happy normal life," so I'm just doing what would make sense and not be servile to win my freedom from the bad guys. I'm sure I'll make it eventually, it's just, how much more will they give up and throw away before they cry mercy? They are very enduring and very immune to crying about their losses, that's about the only "nice" thing you can say about the vietcong who took over the CIA.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So yeah...more work tomorrow, I'll think about my fiction and chess strategy tasks after the investing work is done, hopefully (I think it will work) by tomorrow. I'm cautiously optimistic it will still work...I'll find out tomrorow.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Basically, the CIA said: "OK, he's not 13, he's 36. The way it's gonna work is, he has to legally kill as many thousands of us as possible, as quickly as he can, without breaking the rules or giving up or helping us, or he can't have a date with a young woman until he's 37 or older."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > That's basically the setup.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It is a relief that, even though I plan to leave Virginia ASAP, the doctrine of "nurses will be nurses" is starting to be rejected in favor of patients' rights.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > "What happened to the last guy with this job?"
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > --a question probably not asked much internationally by people who operate drone/satellite harassment, or the people who give them direct orders, or the politicians who supervise and oversee them
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I.e., they're sitting ducks. Go for it, as Kristen once said. She doesn't mess with anyone, I'm pretty sure she won't be in any car crashes, and somehow, she seems to have gotten of here well before I did. I've been "pushing the pedal," driving away from Kroger and, ideally Tuckahoe, as fast as I can for over the past 2 years...and yet I am still here. I acknowledge that that is an impactful failure that is not good for my life satisfaction, but what else I can do? I cannot make the enemy be smart or interested in survival/self-preservation.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Uhh...they edited that, I said, "go for it, *push the pedal*, as Kristen once said. Kristen said, "push the pedal," not go for it. She also said her name was Kristen. I believe her. Maybe I shouldn't. Whatever. She was not a bad guy.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I took my meds about an hour late today. Right now, I am trying to write out some simple pseudocode for my macro task tomorrow.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I realized, based on a hinted communication from a veteran military person who was nice in the past, that probably, Quioccasin Blond actually is good. Excellent! I won't say anything flirty right now because I can't be sure, but yes, I'd be happy to get a date with Quioccasin Blond once this is all over...someone hinted to me outside tonight that it might be over in 9 days, maybe that's true.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just watched a little bit--not much--of Jennifer Shahade's interview. I saw her sort of looking up and to the left and to the right with her eyes in the interview.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I re-read my post about the sexual assault allegation. What I noticed was that it seemed like maybe she was sort of saying, "I appreciate / don't mind your perspective that much, but I think you are acting a bit partriarchy-linked regarding saying that crime victims, including sex assault victims, should not 'publicly flog' their defendants."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I hadn't mean to be condescending or trying to "use the fact that I'm male" to throw my weight around. I think she is disagreeing politely and not accusing me of anything. I saw my perspective as an articulation of my political beliefs, applied to one "case" that I've heard of. Come to think of it, I think life experiences are pretty much inextricable from political beliefs, at least in many cases. To me, "public flogging" and "appreciation of cessation of harm" are a big deal to me. I didn't intend anything hostile or resentful to Ms. Shahade or other sex assault victims, but if I had been trying inject a criticism, which I wasn't, I would have said, "It is probably very hard to come forward as a female sex assault victim to get help, but it is much much harder for men, at least including mentally ill men, to find a shoulder to cry on." I once saw a woman sitting down on the sidewalk on Quioccasin Road, looking sad and like she needed help. I felt certain that even though I am always ignored, she was going to have a man who found her pretty walk up to her and offer to help her with her problem within the hour...pretty young women can get that within 60 minutes, I cannot get that kind of help within 6 years...not even close.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think it is definitely true that crime victims ought to be allowed to speak freely about their feelings about the crime.. I think the case could go either way regarding my claim about "public flogging" or "sadism"; if the person is not in jail, is the goal to get the person in jail? Does it deter future bad actions? I guess, deep down, what I was thinking without realizing it was, the *volume* of the criticisms are competitive. I see myself as having accepted, on grounds of realism, some extremely unusual things about how our society seems to actually work...e.g., a lot of people I knew in the past have literally no interest in getting in touch with me or each other, for no particular hostility-related reason, and I just learned to accept that, like, "Nobody says hi near the Metro outside of the train in DC," when I was young kid. So I guess I would say, the high volume of claims about sexual assault isn't exactly disappointing to me in an absolute sense, but maybe I agree that it is totally allowed, defensible, and acceptable to discuss one's own personal crime issue, after it has been "partially resolved" to the extent it can be...maybe I inadvertently resent literally everyone who is a victim of a crime who can rally some amount of support to their cause. Imagine an Iraqi civilian killed in a US bombing in 2006; he or she might have been stood up for as part of a bracket when Britney Spears sounded like she was saying "Iraq-fuls," like "Crackerfuls," the Ritz cheese snack (those were great, where did they go?), but other than that, everyone will be silent about whoever that person was in the US media for the next 10 years, almost for sure.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > You could see it as like a personality trait....my personality may have been altered. Maybe in 2010, I would said, "Yeah, women should totally speak up and talk incessantly if someone dares to sexually harass them--go for it, talk up a storm, never be quiet until you want to be"...I can still see that perspective as plausible, but my mentality is more jaded, at least right now, and "willing to accept cynical interpretations regarding how many people ever get justice," and inclined to see "a long line of crime victims who are metaphorically being helped by someone behind a desk, as though at the DMV, and some people are *able* to be shooed away from receiving the help and support, in my case after 0.00 seconds, and some people are better at staying at the front of the line to get more help from the assistant." It's the same thing I always saw when I would go shopping at the grocery store when younger; everyone would always answer my Mom when she approached strangers and started up a conversation...that has literally almost never worked for me, but I still give scathingly vicious reviews to grocery store workers who won't let go of the discrimination. Anyway, that's a big of a tangent...but there is a "mentally ill male" perspective, regarding "being treated as a chronic eye/presence-sore/whatever" wherever you go in public, and the mild resentment regarding the sort of unsympathetic perspectives of some women--I am not criticizing Shahade, I think she is well above average at caring about issues like mine, and I think she is thoughtful enough that she is quite helpful and smart about issues like mine--towards some mentally ill men who did not take the exit route of killing people or jumping off a cliff when the "legions of stalkers and vigilantes" came charging up to put the mentally ill men in terrible pain and new agony at very high levels that most people will never experience and that changes you like if you were a sword being re-made being put in a furnace, changed forever chemically (involuntarily as a person) while being subjected to very high temperatures without wanting to.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway I'm getting tired...I'll go grab something to eat and go to sleep soon. Overall I think Jennifer Shahade is fine, I'm just saying, I wasn't trying to be condescending...to use one of my metaphors, it's, "I'm a very intelligent and hard-working ex-Marine veteran with one leg wheeling myself around in a wheelchair, and I reflexively bristle, properly or not, at people who have high abilities, like 'rights' in a sense, like equal water fountain use rights, to speak out about assaults against them, that go well beyond mine." Maybe I am irrational. I could be wrong. I am just identifying where my feelings that provoked a reaction must have come from.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A good lawyer hinted to me some time ago:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > The secret deal that has been made regarding Congress having trafficked me is:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - If they stop trafficking me and saying "f--- off" to me completely, they get everything back that was seized, including poll numbers, immediately.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - The catch is, every time Congress says, "Oh, we're thinking about releasing him, let's consider it," and then they "deliberate" for some time, and then they back out and say "we decided we don't want to release him," the percentage of "everything" that they could back is decreased, due to a sort of "metaphorical burning' of assets that they could have gotten back.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - The deal never ends, just the "pot of gold" that Congress can get returned to them gets smaller and smaller, the more they gaslight everyone about why I am being held and when/if they are going to release me.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > If I interpreted that right, it sounds true!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I just woke up. I am sad that, now at the age of 36, I have suffered a lot, and still never seen a vagina up close...I have barely ever had sex, and I'm approaching middle age. That is very disappointing to me.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'll get started on my tasks soon. I had a dream that I woke up today at 2 p.m., I don't know what that means.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Hopefully things will improve for me soon! It has been such a long wait for me to have a normal life, I'm glad I was supported enough to not die, but I wish I had been supported enough to not have to suffer as a slave for over 10 years! It's better than nothing, but really not by much. The arrangements made for me were not very good at all, and there doesn't seem to be much complaint about that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I saw a Tweet on Jennifer Shahade's page, saying, "how the f--- is this controversial." Chit-chat with the fort, tachyons fan?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe she is just passing the argument along...if I were really trying to secure my freedom, I would email my recruiter.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > As a matter of fact, I did that in 2011, after the FBI did not respond. I was ignored. Shortly thereafter, I was tortured by the robots. My email messages were fine, but as I later learned in my Privacy Act Request Response, my recruiter lied about me, filing fictitious reports with security personnel at NSA, prompting a lot of very strangely agreeable NSA people to respond enthusiastically and affirmingly to her false reports. One of them said, "[This] makes me miss special actions," i.e., in true lynch-mob form, some NSA people wanted me killed for emailing Brea Delaney, simply asking for help.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Indeed, I did not even email Debra Holtzclaw, the TexelTek security officer who had helped gaslight me when I worked there, but she also filed a fabricated complaint about me with other NSA security people, claiming that I had physically shown up to her house and turned off the gas at her residence. Not only do I not know where Debra Holtzclaw lives, I have not even successfully left the state of Virginia once since I returned here after being tortured in Joseph Schwartz's hospital. I tried to drive to Maryland on 09-11-2014 on a whim, to see if I could learn anything about what happened to me, but the government satellites/drones sabotaged my car while I was driving it, forcing me to get a tow truck and call my mother and return home.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, it is not a safe option for me to contact anyone at DOD. They would not respond, and retaliate, again, for the commuication effort.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > In case *you* would like to contact Brea Delaney to discuss, here are two email addresses to try (apparently she got promoted to "technical recruiter" according to the PARR, and her maiden name is DelCostello):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > bmd...@nsa.gov
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > bmd...@nsa.gov
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Warning: When I emailed her second email address, she said that I "shouldn't have known" (words to that effect) about that email. Also, she knows my social security number, and has repeated it to other NSA personnel in emails.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Let me write that out again, Google seems to think it outranks me in NSA power or something:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > bmdelco at nsa dot gov
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > bmdelan at nsa dot gov
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My technical interview or whatever, for the civilian position before my clearance was delayed and the position filled so I used my clearance when I got it to work for a contractor instead, was conducted by Paul Hermann; he might have retired, he was much older than Brea. I also interviewed with Stacy Bober, and there was another guy whose name I didn't catch. I don't know Stacy Bober's middle initial...it might have been Stacey also, I don't know...but here is Paul Hermann's email, whether he still works there or not:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > pdherma at nsa dot gov
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > There are problematic issues with my ability to use VBA code in Excel. Some of the macro commands are not working right, it is the product of malware sabotage.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Regarding Shahade...I hope she supports me, and not the female perpetrator, Ivy Smith. I don't actually know if Smith is still accusing me of inappropriate behavior. My message, whether or not others had read it, contained almost no sexual content, a few delusional ideas that I expressed because I couldn't help it because I was mentally ill (I said, "I'm not sure if I'm September yet," regarding a horoscope-like note she had posted to her FB, which might have been about me, and maybe intended to gaslight me, I don't know for sure about that note), and nothing hostile or unfriendly.. I had previously posted a note saying something negative about her, and how she had treated in the past...in October, I published a steganography note, which contained one reference to her and was mainly not about her. Her dog was named "Belle," as she had told me back when we were friends...I was posting a note that was mainly about typo steganography, and I thought, "Why don't I just use the idea I was describing in this note to say something to Ivy Smith, whom I had always liked?", and I mis-spelled the word "bell" as "belle," as a means to signal that I remember Ivy and would want to talk about her again. The note contained ideas relating to the idea of typo steganography and the idea of "not admitting that you're saying something in code" and using typos to communicate and signal knowledge of something, based on the assumption that you are saying something in code, which you could deny. FYI, I had stopped medications, with doctor permission and guidance, that month, in October also, a little bit before...I wasn't that mentally ill yet. There was nothing hostile or vicious or sexual or harassing or inappropriate about anything I said; I did start losing my mind more as I was increasingly followed around campus and stego-signalled and gaslighted by other students, and eventually professors, especially CS professors...one professor appeared to be quoting from an IM I had sent to Ms. Smith when talking about me withdrawing from his class. My interests were not vicious, not related to rape, and intended to be friendly and interested in talking to Ms. Smith again. I was not interested in rape or violence, although admittedly, after I was psychologically assaulted a lot, I daydreamed about violence against some people who were hurting me, but I never planned to actually strike back, and I sought help repeatedly, including asking other students if they thought I should go to a hospital, and they just brushed me off and didn't want to get involved in helping me. My initial note, in October, was not very strange, and I just looked shy, not aggressive. I don't know who started the "f--- Philip White" wave after that--I had been working on the discrete logarithm problem all summer, and my expressed approach to the problem, based on "binary construction" and a statistical test and properties of logarithms, was good enough that many number theorists could have completed the solution, but I hadn't realized that myself yet...but basically, I had no idea what was going on, and didn't understand why people started stalking and signaling me around campus. Someone--Billy Ella--got me into steganography by mentioning it, and that he was interested in doing some sort of steganography research...he was a math/CS major too, I got interested in stego ideas myself after that. Maybe it was his exact plot to try to kill me, he was willing to talk to me in the past, but was not all threat friendly and admitted as much one time when I chatted with him on AIM after I had graduated.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said "talk to her again," I'm sick of being sabotaged by *actual* criminal terrorists, I am not such a person myself, truly. It's supposed to be freaky Friday...the terrorists run the government, and the real IC workers get labeled as terrorists and hunted for years, without being "negotiated with."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So yes, I cannot proceed with the stocks program now, because my Excel is hacked...too bad for me for now, I guess.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I wonder: If this went far enough, e.g., if two months later, after my innocence was fully investigated and established, again, would Jennifer Shahade finally, "OK, enough is enough, this has gone too far for this poor guy...I am going to make an exception to my policy and actually reach out to him and email him and help him get out of this mess, since no one else will be reasonable or talk to him about what the bad guys are saying. He deserves fair treatment and has had enough; I will speak to him if no one else will."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I would think that a good leader, anywhere, would do that for me within a month at this point. That is my opinion.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, even if I *had* said something inappropriate--sexual or aggressive or threatening--wouldn't most reasonable people agree that I should "get a free pass" since it would have just been ramblings of someone who was very sick and needed help, not something to be condemned, because it didn't physically hurt anyone and was just the product of an illness? It's like if someone were drugged with PCP and wasn't acting like themselves for a few weeks, until they got treatment. Surely no one believes that there should be no support for mental health treatment for mentally ill people?
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > In my case, that isn't even what happened...I actually didn't cross the line at all, even off meds--my behavior was close to perfect, especially with regard to Ms. Smith. But if it had happened, in someone else's case, mental health should come into consideration. People should not be auto-condemned for being sick. If they were , then people would start auto-condemning people for being biologically different in the sense of being female, and a lot of people would not enjoy that.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I'm going to have change my schedule around today...I'll walk at the mall at around 2. I won't do the "attack prose" today, I'll do it tomorrow. I'll probably spend today doing more chess-related strategy, should be fun.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A lawyer hinted to me in the past: The consequence of this is being seen by Congressional leaders as, "Oh well, we've lost this around." The hinted claim was, Congress is literally completely done at ever getting any big legislation passed, ever again...in the future, all Congressional legislators will get nothing significant done at all, not just Dave Brat.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway...I guess it's back to relaxing and chess for me. I might do a little more fiction reading.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I hope that my innocence at whatever they're saying I did is established soon...if it isn't, it's going to be clear, as it already is clear to some degree, that Americans are fond of "gladiator sadism" against people that they don't find "very entertaining/beautiful"; it looks Americans like punishing and torturing "fake criminals," with no regard for the facts at all.. In some cases, there is no fact or disclosure or revision/correction to the story, clarifying more what actually happened, about whatever fake leaking or stalking incident I'm claimed to have been involved with as a perpetrator, that would change anyone's mind. They don't actually *care* if I'm guilty of anything, and it's not about justice or right or wrong, it's about power, evil, sadism, getting one's way, and slavery. Justice, honor, and the truth have nothing to do with it, for them.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > *lost this round.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > OK, I have a doctor appointment at 4, so I decided to just wait and stay home and work on chess strategy. I'll prepare my attack fiction, and hopefully also publish it on Usenet, tomorrow.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Hmmm...I just now thought to look up the definition of "crank," I had thought it meant "someone who believes in pseudo-science":
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (2)
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > : an annoyingly eccentric person
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > also : one who is overly enthusiastic about a particular subject or activity
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > FYI, just in case, the "What do you personally in your mind think I seem like or remind you of?" game is not productive, and not part of a serious argument about crime and punishment.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I realized something, based on a tip from the past, while playing chess: The doctors who are working with me are claiming that, after all these years of abuse and just criticisms, that there is "still something wrong with how I act," and that I have some more "health improvement and growing up to do." That is absurd, but I am not in a position to protest myself against medical care...apparently, aside from Dr. K and Dr. Steg in the past, the doctors have not "signed off the idea that I'm ready to talk and work yet," they seem to have some "peculiar flavor of person that they would I be and/or remind them of," and I think it has to do with ideals about "humility" and "knowing my place," as though as an American citizen with a mental health condition, I am automatically "somewhere down low in the chain of command in a US military of sorts," and I must "learn to start doing things the doctors' way," or I must not be allowed to speak, date, or work, or make money at all.. They want me excluded from society until I "measure up to their secret standards of behavior."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Again, I don't think Dr. K or Dr. Steg were a part of it, it's an extremely vicious and brutal, highly political move against me. I am grateful for the tip from years ago...and it is helping my chess too!
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > *unjust
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > In case you are into art and interested in art theory, maybe much more knowledgeable than I am about fiction: I am opposed to the idea, philosophically, of "character-driven fiction." All characters, typically, in a novel are human, and what matters is their talents, choices, and successful/unsuccessful endeavors, not "a peculiar trait-smell of a particular character, presented to the world in prose, who needs to be judged by you, the reader, with all sorts of details an innuendo about everything right and wrong with the character and the world, and how those two things and what's going on with them these days are related." Fiction is about plot and interesting stories, and personal acts of courage and other nouns, it ought not to be a "discrimination lab."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It is unacceptable for every nasty thing that is done to me to be characterized as "part of involuntary mental health treatment because I'm oh-so-crazy because you said so because I express politically-related anger," and/or "a delusion.." We are now at a point, in our society, where anyone can walk up to a mentally ill person and punch him/her in the face and steal their wallet, and law enforcement will not help, because the crime will be claimed to be "a delusion," essentially always. The FBI itself has failed, completely, as a viable government agency due to this outrageous mentality.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FArZxLj6DLk
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Oh, I just figured it out! All along, he was saying, "Philip, don't offend cats when you rap."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It's about triangulation. I also found a connection between this and the dance in Jimmy Fallon performance of "My Oh My" or however that's ordered on Jimmy Fallon's show. I'm off music for now though, mostly anyway.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Let's crunch the code: FOTCMOMHVRJF. OK: MOM, HOV[E]R [with] JCT, FF.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Ah, it's about the NSA, the CIA, and this YouTube video...it's like a woman-focused re-write request, fascinating:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FFKNfV2nf8A
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > ...uh, guys...guys...they removed the clip I was talking about. It's the part where the guy said, "Dad, {I'm going to be a, don't be a} cryptozoologist." It was there, it was the guy...wait I just watched it again, it's back.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > False alarm.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So, I realized something today, based on a hint from another patient at Tucker Psych...it seems like, at this point, anyone would totally be able to talk to me without any kind of hindrance from the government. I believe that the mechanics of how it works is, all of the bad guys have been identified and put under surveillance, probably by drug companies and other NAMI/disabled-lobby allies, with airplanes. Basically, all they need to do to put an ongoing law-breaker under surveillance is: 1) Prepare the legal justification with a good lawyer and send that justification to the FBI, perhaps via email to one of their field offices, 2) Purchase a high-flying airplane with infrared, fans hardware, and appropriate and safe/risk-free software developed by good engineers, 3) Have a few other devices, such as a small hidden camera, available on the ground to be moved around by the planes to keep all law-breaking targets under constant 24/7 surveillance, round the clock, by private companies and organizations that are legally allowed to do so, without interference by the FBI because their actions would not be illegal. So all of the bad guys have surely been completely halted and are completely under surveillance, it is totally safe to talk to me now...all the bad guys are totally hacked and under constant surveillance, they can't do anything any more, even if you are identified talking to me.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, that would suggest that at this point, I'm *definitely* only being hit by foreign satellites and fighter jets, with permission directly from Joseph R. Biden, who might be immune to being surveilled under the Constitution because he is the President.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > So if you're feeling scared of foreign satellites or whatever, and you've heard of me, why not talk to me??
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Maybe in light of that, I should not publish my attack fiction after all.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > At this point, I'm basically "heads up" against Joe Biden. Biden makes deals with pawns, whom he quickly discards when they act like they are "physics labs that don't want to hire Stephen Hawking," and as it turns out, no one is successfully bothering me or preventing me from working in this country, except for maybe some past-tense software saboteurs who are done acting, except for Biden himself and his foreign comrades.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > What should I do now?? Am I the only one in this position? It is literally just one person, an unpopular failure US President, personally using his persuasive powers and media platform to prevent me from socializing, working, or making money. I guess the media is also complicit for not running the story...one question is, why doesn't a lawyer who would like to help with this case get in touch with me? I don't know which lawyer to contact. Surely some lawyers have read this...why aren't you emailing me to help?? I literally cured cancer, aren't there supposed to be ambulance chasers out there looking to make some money? Helping me get rid of JRB as a stalker would be a good career advertisement, too.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Somehow, I suspect I won't hear from any lawyers or anyone else for a while...I don't know why not? Once again, what the heck is this? I'm perfectly ready and able to talk..
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > My sense of it is, there's another wave of bad guys that is about to get caught and put under surveillance by drug companies, eager to do research on people who are evil and very easy and fairly cheap to watch, completely nude if necessary, 24/7, for their experiments. They will probably never even be notified.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I saw a girl who looked like she was visually impaired who was brought by someone who looked like her mother to Deep Run Park often in the past. I was concerned that the mother was bringing her daughter, if she was that, to an unsafe place, when she is not an adult and does not really need to be there with her Mom. I stopped walking at Deep Run Park, and then the mother and daughter showed up to the mall. I did feel some sympathy and concern for the girl...was she being groomed to be treated like me in the future??...and I nodded acknowledgment to the mother-looking person, and then I saw them again on the other side of the mall, and it seemed like the mother-person was imitating a different, higher-pitched voice, like she was trying to pretend that the younger girl was talking, maybe to get my attention and get me to look up, and I realized she probably knows who I am and is following me around with her probably disabled daughter to look for locals who might be interested in bothering her daughter...I hope the girl gets help.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It occurred to me that maybe the nurse practitioner isn't bad...it's just, I am targeted by satellites, and no one in the community feels like talking to me, and no firms say no to Biden and choose to hire me. She didn't explicitly say, "You're not healthy enough to socialize."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also, btw, in case anyone has questions about the VT massacre...it is pretty clear that likely Taiwanese poster "wij" is quite closely linked to the masterminds of the attack, who weaponized the on-the-ground mentally ill perpetrator Cho, and compelled him with psychological pain and satellite/fighter-jet action to shoot 32 other students at VT and then himself If you're looking for answers, that's probably why the international community agreed to put this freak out here--to answer your questions about why he killed all those people.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I think the thing about this area is, people who are happy here and not trying to move out are "very big Spanberger fans," whether they know that she didn't actually work for the CIA or not. So yeah, I think people who are mentally ill should try to get jobs in other areas if at all possible...this is not a good place to live if you are mentally ill, even though some listing that mentions "the best places for mental health treatment" says that RVA is one of the best, that is clearly wrong.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Anyway, regarding myself...I'm about to take my meds, and since I'm not doing fiction and can't do STEM for money or serious investing at all, I'm going to probably spend tomorrow doing some chess strategy. My new batch of ideas about chess is coming along, I have many different "philosophical takes" on chess.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > By the way, here is a comment about "where I go the idea to be a little bit healthily paranoid from"...it was Dr. More in her cryptology class. She mentioned a number of very important things before I withdrew; I didn't understand how much thought and science and strategy, including individualized education for specific students, can be done. I very much oppose Dr. Mellinger, Dr. Helmstutler, and Dr. K politically, but they and Dr. Edmunds are indeed very talented educators, there is not denying that, and I did learn from them. I think they are bad people who supported letting me get attacked and they did not warn me--I could be wrong, I am least suspicious of Dr. Edmunds, whom I was sometimes rude to improperly as an undergrad--but they do know how to teach math well and I did learn from them.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I was thinking about: What advice would I give to people who want to get good at math? I wouldn't share everything I know at all..mainly I would say:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Start when you're young; 2 or 3 is a good age to see if you want to get started at math, I think...but don't tell yourself you're too late if you're older.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Make sure you really like it.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Try to be philosophical about it and maybe hold debates about it, or, if you don't like philosophy, find another "secondary lens" to help you dig deeper into the subject.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Expect to be surprised and to have to rely on "raw talent," i.e., to focus a lot not on "math (self-)education doctrine," but instead on doing and/or thinking about a lot of math (and hopefully really enjoying as you do it), and try to keep pushing yourself harder, which will be easier if you enjoy making progress. Expect to not always understand *why* you are getting better or having really good ideas about it.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - A good idea for a favorite word if you want to apply math to real-world challenges: "lenses." Never tell yourself you've found the *last* application of an interesting mathematical theorem.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Don't burn out and ruin your life...if you can make good plans, have a good time management system for helping your invest your time in math and other activities intelligently.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Do consider "letting yourself be paranoid," i.e., don't afraid to think too hard or consider "appropriate/ethical yet widely disbelieved ideas." The key word is *consider*...you can accept some wild assumptions in an alternate world if you can do it healthily and admit you might be wrong.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Don't be afraid to be quirky....being an unusual thinker seems to have aided my math talent.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > - Don't let people exploit your talent...if you get hurt for sharing math ideas, be willing to cut off some particular type of "math sharing" (I have cut off sharing original research), if you are abused or targeted for your gift that you share with others....you can still converse, but be strict about "a line that must not be crossed" for you to continue being maximally generous and service-y to the world. If people don't respect you enough, they lose access to your STEM gifts, that's one way to protect yourself from endless abuse as a STEM whiz.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I said, "to start," not "to see."
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I notice that I prefer to write on Google Groups because I am more likely to write as though others will read what I'm writing, and it'll make me want to re-read it more later.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I had chess scheduled for tomorrow, but I'm feeling burned out and ought to do something else instead. I don't know what to do.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw, regarding the loans argument....I am *not* taking out a loan from my highly abusive parents. I am accepting, under duress because I had to, the idea that I will live here, and my parents have at least temporarily ceased abusing me, completely actually, which is great and a first for them while near me, the idea that instead of paying me a $300 million lawsuit for lost wages, based on their devious arrangement to prevent me from making money with my excellent math talent through a good career for over 10 years, I am allowed to live here and get money for food. I am really not demanding at all; it is my parents who owe me for having sabotaged my life and finances, not the other way around.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I decided that I am going to compose and publish my attack prose after all...the duress is still relevant, I don't think all the bad guys are surveilled by private companies after all. That will be my main task for today.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Ookay...the freaky Philip-White-obsessed hate-spirituality continues to spill itself out all over the RVA area, wondrous.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I have decided that for now, I am focused exclusively on working to promote my own enjoyment of life. I will not compose or share the fiction I was going to write, I might do it tomorrow, or some other time.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Btw...is it claimed that I leaked the SDI, and fabricated the incidents about being harassed with it? You do realize that the NSA has cameras at many/all of their facilities, and that as an agency, NSA is keenly aware of all information I accessed at their facilities. I had a classified account but never logged into it; literally every piece of information on "the high side" as the NSA calls the classified parts of their facilities that was shared with me was done so via Chris McCubbin, who was physically present with me at all times at all NSA facilities I went to. I did visit an SAIC SCIF with Joe van Oosterhout one time; he shared information, but did not share any information about anything classified.. JV harassed me; CM did not. I obtained no unauthorized access to any information, and leaked nothing. I was not given any access to SDI-related information, and I didn't know it existed, and the NSA knows it. AFAIK, the SDI is not even an American capability. Thus, I am innocent of that charge, also, if that is the lie that has been made about me. I didn't have a physics degree, and didn't even know classical mechanics back then; why would the NSA have told me about physics-related techs they had? Further, if I had somehow obtained information of that nature, it would have been authorized because I would not have needed to know, and I would have been arrested very quickly before quitting DRC. Thus, it is proved, again, that I leaked nothing. Leave me alone, liars and hate pawns.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > I might do some chess strategy today.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > * it would not have been authorized
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Also: If the NSA had wanted an algorithm from me to help with the SDI, they would have asked without telling me what the problem is. Indeed, many low-side conversations at the TexelTek facility (which did not have a SCIF AFAIK) involved "talking around classified information," i.e., problems would be presented without the true intended application of the stated problem. If someone had wanted help regarding an SDI-related algorithm--maybe they did??--they would have asked me about a mathematical formalism, and not tell me anything about what the use of the idea would be. I was a math/CS person, with some talent at abstract algebra--I might be mis-directing you--not a physicist. They would never tell me about that, and I find it *very upsetting* that the NSA itself refuses to point that out. I helped them, and they tossed me to the wolves, for being disabled.. They could have gotten me out of trouble with one sentence stated, but apparently, they want me to suffer and then eventually "do the debate myself," and I guess that's how US lawyers feel, too. *I* have to investigate and debate and ask questions to secure my freedom and prove my innocence, even without a trial, no one else will do the work to do that for me.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > A clear observation that I think is very true: A lot of neurotypical people think that if they are at some point in the future caught having been "very harmfully delusional" about something, perhaps including something about "someone deserving all the worst treatment," perhaps even "someone deserving to be killed," that, because they were neurotypical and not bipolar or schizophrenic, that they will get *much gentler* treatment than someone like Jared Loughner would, even if they wind up, through their confusion and illegal activities, killing many more innocent people based on their incorrect duress argument than Loughner did. I think they will find themselves to be wrong; the mentally ill are closer to have an *excuse,* based on science, than average jerks who want to kill people as a fun and engaging political activity and say it's all legal, falsely.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > Internationally, all of the "neurotypical Jared Loughners" who just truly, truly believed that I was guilty, and in lethal, illegal, and very harmful/destructive ways, *must* be held accountable, including in the "loans, risk-analysis, debts, and harm-to-market" sense to an extent much greater than Loughner. Indeed, if such people in the US and internationally are *not* held accountable for what they've done to the same extent that Loughner was, then all of them owe both *him*, and the victims of his crimes, and *me*, more than Loughner owes the US government in jailtime, due to the fact that Loughner and his victims have been forced to exist in a more imperfect and opaque justice system. I claim: If the prediction of the "wild neurotypical unchecked, un-arrested neurotypical-passing Loughners" running around killing people while delusional and acting strange without being punished had not already been made and plugged into the system by forecasters, Loughner would have been, based on the altered mechanics of the system, stopped by the police and prevented from killing anyone. So it largely their forecasted unchecked behavior that is the most to blame for Loughner's crimes, more so than his own confused actions while not getting help for his medical condition.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > * and behaved
> > > > > > > > > > > > The mechanism of how I am contained:
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > A lot of people have invested a lot of time in effort in weaving a false "riskiness and damaging nature" narrative about me. People have made up lies, especially ones that they will not precent to me for rebuttal, to claim that "if you are seen with me being nice to me, you are spending time with someone you should not be seen with, because he is a very damaging, risky person who has done awful things to various economic markets." The case is based on lies, and Biden is the real risk guy, but he has the platform and the connections, so he has delegated dozens of liars to go out and weave fabrications about me to make sure that if anyone tries to befriend me, they'll get seen as "very risky and damaging to be around," too.
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > The lies machine is itself, in reality, actually very very damaging to all sorts of different markets, including European safety and security and American banks and low-income workers. Biden is desperate to stay in control of the persuasive lies machine, to get immature people to run around convincing other immature people to believe and propagate lies and pull the wool over each others' eyes, so that he can escape being fully blamed for all the catastrophes he has caused...he wants to be the "ghost debt ower," who owes all the money and doesn't pay it, increasing risk and insecurity and damage greatly within the relevant markets, but "lying his way out of culpability"--he wants other people, including well-known people, to take the blame instead of him. That's his startup--"Lying to Americans Very Effectively, Inc."--and if it works, everyone who uses the startup as a customer gets hurt, and he improves his reputational outcome and gets "free hurt opportunities" against all sorts of people, from Obama to me to his worst enemies to his greatest backers whom he thinks won't go far enough for him to some of his friends.
> > > > > > > > > > > "Think fast, Jareds."
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > Remember my post on my (now deleted) blog about early adopters? What do you think you should do, right or as soon as humanly possible? Anything about what you're doing or what your current claimed role is that you might want to change?
> > > > > > > > > > * right now
> > > > > > > > > Something I realized from a tip from the past: I need to *never* be positively judgmental in public, ever again. Whenever I give someone a "good review," it *always* comes back to haunt me and I wind up being isolated. I guess I was not meant to be a critic. I might stumble with that, but in the future, I will not give out any good reviews to anyone who does anything or has any interaction with me. I also formally retract all good reviews of everything and everyone I've ever commented about, in public and elsewhere, with this post. I think that will help me, the tip was good.
> > > > > > > > I think indeed, the mechanics of the good review and its aftermath tend to be:
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > "OK, yeah, I agree that he's really difficult...OK I just got the review, let's go, pull the plug on his support and try to screw him over again, just like last time, this is going to work out great for me, I got the good review from him, I'll be reimbursed for that handsomely."
> > > > > > > Also, since I will not have anything to do with academic publishing in the future, I will not ever cite anyone for anything, ever again.
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > I am also unlikely to ever publish a novel...I will probably just publish short fiction.
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > I can't imagine that I will ever need money again. My parents are giving me money for now. It looks like, if I ever get liberated, I will be able to immediately predict the stock market with my math ideas...so unless I have a job I would really want to do, I will probably never work or have a job again, outside of the stock market.
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > Basically, I am ready to retire. I'm done doing all service, and done being employed...I'll likely do chess, investing, writing short fiction, exercise, and maybe boxing whenever the bad guys have had enough and the satellites are pointed elsewhere. I will never air public praise for anyone ever again, I promise. If I accidentally say something praising someone else, please disregard it and don't count it as a "serious good review." My good reviews have only gotten me into trouble, and now I am exploited for good reviews, almost constantly, so indeed, I must stop completely.
> > > > > > Yeah I'll respond:
> > > > > >
> > > > > > "I don't have a job, and now no longer need one. I don't owe you anything, you do owe me something. You have conducted yourselves as homicidal fascists, openly, and owe it to me *at least* to force Joe Biden to remove satellite access to me, end the malware assaults against me, stop smearing me, and leave me alone completely. Failure to comply by the end of March--you're getting a new deadline--will lead to 20 years of unceasing assaults against the US economy and national interests, by me, no backing down no matter what. Make your choice carefully, you ought to bring up your grade at investing and cut your losses. I can basically do this forever, unless of course you actually do succeed at murdering me. Do you want this to stop or do you want this to continue? It shouldn't be your choice, but it is. I am not breaking the laws, but I am *very hostile* to you and not ashamed of that at all. All you would have to do is leave me alone by the end of March, can you do that, can you think of a better response?"
> > > > > The logic is, I understand the intransigent and evil US government enemy that has been hunting me for years. I am literally, factually, unequivocally innocent; I did nothing wrong and was helping them. They decided to kill me no matter what; I know that to have been illegal and very morally wrong. They murdered 3 more people in my family. Now, as a consequence of their hunting, I very properly *despise* them and want to damage their interests. I would not have despised them if they had hunted me.
> > > > >
> > > > > I already tried to pay the ransom, and they still wouldn't let me go. It looks like, they are determined to kill me no matter what, and hold me illegally in a cage. I might be here for the next 50 years, it's not my fault, there is nothing I could have done differently. At this point, the only thing I can do, as a "surviving Jew-type person in an ongoing attempted holocaust" is, threaten to strike back as hard as I can. If I played nice, they would not release me...that was investigated. I won't break rules; that wouldn't help me. If I can do enough damage to my persecutors, who refuse to even negotiate or speak honestly or at all with me, I *might* decrease the probability that I will still be here in 2 months. I also might not. It is my best bet, why would anyone criticize for doing the exact same thing that you would do in my situation, except that I don't break laws and I am fair? Don't you see that slavery doesn't pay yet? I will fight forever for my excellent values and positive vision of America if I must. Don't you want to stop doing the wrong thing and stop paying the high price I've imposed for it? Do you think I shouldn't be allowed to do that??? You already know that you're morally wrong, now you are learning that you are politically mostly powerless, and your problem is getting worse and worse because you won't stop with me. Why doesn't that make you want to stop? I will hurt you more, whether you deny it or not. I just want my freedom and my rights. I never did anything wrong, I followed all the rules, I fought fair and only tried to get what I deserved, nothing more. You've hired smear-cheerleaders to wave their pom-poms and say that I deserve this, based on a *totally fabricated* version of reality, that you won't even share with me to let me correct your lies. You started out being un-American, soon you will be total failures.
> > > > >
> > > > > Want to stop? What's that, no, you want to see where we are in 4 months? OK, we will see that, for sure, if you don't, and you probably won't, knowing you VC-types!
> > > > * if they had not hunted me
> > > I think the pretty clear comment is, 99% of the people who are attacking me do not understand what a *war* is, and that is particularly true of Petraeus and Obama types.
> > It's kind of like Joe Biden is running a restaurant, and some of the diners are on the menu.
> >
> > The problem is, there are people interested in being copy cats.
> Years ago:
>
> "Oh, I think that would be really good for him!! That will be a great way for him to have a meaningful life, for once."