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Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function. -- Garrison Keillor


interests / alt.humor.puns / Re: Crew

Re: Crew

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Subject: Re: Crew
From: donstock...@hotmail.com (Don Stockbauer)
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 by: Don Stockbauer - Wed, 4 May 2022 19:32 UTC

On Wednesday, May 4, 2022 at 11:32:07 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> On May 4, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
> (in article<220394d1-ecc2-4f8f...@googlegroups.com>):
> > On Wednesday, May 4, 2022 at 6:05:21 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > On May 3, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > (in article<8f0fab84-0a4e-4da0...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > On Tuesday, May 3, 2022 at 12:20:07 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > On May 3, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > (in article<72aa4fdb-6876-4a38...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > On Tuesday, May 3, 2022 at 6:13:50 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > On May 2, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > (in article<52a0cfda-7776-4d90...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > On Monday, May 2, 2022 at 1:20:28 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > On May 2, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > (in article<7a522ad7-c418-48e6...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > On Monday, May 2, 2022 at 3:25:38 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > On May 1, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > (in article<3ab0f23f-6a1e-4558...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > On Sunday, May 1, 2022 at 8:47:42 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > On Apr 30, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<28c81fcd-d867-4351...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > look On Saturday, April 30, 2022 at 1:58:16 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Apr 30, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<dcffa204-2543-4ab0...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Saturday, April 30, 2022 at 6:43:57 AM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Apr 29, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<d522145b-75f9-41c2...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Friday, April 29, 2022 at 3:00:30 PM UTC-5, Mike wrote:
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > On Apr 29, 2022, Don Stockbauer wrote
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > (in article<320b3968-fc6b-4235...@googlegroups.com>):
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > my distant relative Alonso Stockbauer was given land by
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Great
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Britain
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > It
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > was
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > a huge amount of paperwork to cover all the legal
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > technicalities
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > of
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > him
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > accepting this huge piece of land . he finally got the
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > paper
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > all
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > together
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > and
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > he had to Cary Grant out to the car..
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Can’t do that now as they do not make cars like they auto.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > There was this fellow (not me) who was caught , well , how do
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > we
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > say
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > this
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > delicately , enjoying the amorous interaction between himself
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > and
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > his
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > car's
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > tail pipe; he was arrested for being auto erotic
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Prurient speculation on your part
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > No, no I was watching him from behind the bushes and I was just
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > watching
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > him
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > mind you , not doing anything else just viewing no other
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > activity
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > on
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > my
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > part.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > If this was a liars contest, you would be stiff competition with
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > that
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > one
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > I heard about this orgy where there was stiff competition , and
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > the
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > music
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > played during it was Frankie Valli's classic "I keep working my
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > way
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > back
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > to
> > > > > > > > > > > > > > you, babe”
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Another phallus-cy
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > > There was his fellow running around nude in our town and everyone
> > > > > > > > > > > > thought
> > > > > > > > > > > > he
> > > > > > > > > > > > didn't have a penis . So he finally stops in front of a crowd,
> > > > > > > > > > > > pointed
> > > > > > > > > > > > his
> > > > > > > > > > > > midsection and says "it's a phallus, see, that I have no penis.”
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > So now he is famous for exposing his shortcomings
> > > > > > > > > > > (I give credit to David Niven for that one)
> > > > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > there was this fellow who had a very strange physiological defect in
> > > > > > > > > > that
> > > > > > > > > > when he had sexual intercourse he could only ejaculate for 1/10 of a
> > > > > > > > > > second
> > > > > > > > > > 1/10 of a second mind you he really got depressed about it he went to
> > > > > > > > > > the
> > > > > > > > > > doctor a renowned sex therapist and Said doc I have a shortcoming.
> > > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > > Oh I'm sorry that's the same pun you gave ; well I can't come up with
> > > > > > > > > > anything better
> > > > > > > > > So you had second thoughts.
> > > > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > > > >
> > > > > > > > my brain is just beyond description as for being fast and competent and
> > > > > > > > nice
> > > > > > > > and hard-working and fast and nice , for most of this activity the time
> > > > > > > > between synoptical transmissions and receiving's is like a trillionth
> > > > > > > > of
> > > > > > > > a
> > > > > > > > second but sometimes like when I'm drunk my thoughts take a lot longer
> > > > > > > > so
> > > > > > > > in
> > > > > > > > that case I have instead of just a minute fraction of a second
> > > > > > > > thoughts I
> > > > > > > > have second thoughts.
> > > > > > > Thas called a race condition --- rushing to judgement
> > > > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > > > >
> > > > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > > > >
> > > > > > Once I burned down my neighbor's barn ; he came after me with a
> > > > > > pitchfork .
> > > > > > he said we're gonna have a rush to judgment here.
> > > > > That is about the scythe of it.
> > > > > Michael LeVine
> > > > > mle...@redshift.com
> > > > >
> > > > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > > > finding it everywhere,
> > > > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > > > Groucho Marx
> > > >
> > > > I am not going to be around someone like you that lisps when he tries to
> > > > say
> > > > "size.”
> > >
> > > Your not wanting to speaks volumes about how a comparison would turn out
> > > Michael LeVine
> > > mle...@redshift.com
> > >
> > > Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> > > finding it everywhere,
> > > diagnosing it incorrectly,
> > > and applying the wrong remedies.
> > > Groucho Marx
> >
> > A comparison between me and you would be like a comparison between a diseased
> > giraffe and a crater on the moon.
> But why would I need to moon you??
> Michael LeVine
> mle...@redshift.com
>
> Politics is the art of looking for trouble,
> finding it everywhere,
> diagnosing it incorrectly,
> and applying the wrong remedies.
> Groucho Marx

Because it would give me a chance to see exactly how big of a posterior you are.

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o Crew

By: Mike on Wed, 20 Apr 2022

265Mike
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