In homage to Steve Packer's stupid self-inflected injury the other day
(see thread "Fuck"), I thought I'd join in..

Sunday was perhaps the worst [1] and certainly the most embarrassing
day in my unremarkable racing career.

Race 1, ZXR750 - did the warm-up lap, rolled onto my grid position,
put my foot down.... and just toppled over! No idea how or why, just
lost my balance. Picked the bike up, but it was flooded and wouldn't
start, so pushed it off the grid and the race went off without me. No
damage to bike, and none to me apart from pride

Race 2, TZ250 - on the third or fourth lap, the engine went
buuurrrrhhh, with no acceleration, so I put my left hand up (to signal
I was slowing to following riders) and pulled off the track. At that
point, the engine seized, locking the rear wheel solid and bucking
around violently such that I couldn't get my left hand back to the
bars to pull the clutch in. I was spat off the bike and landed hard
on my chest.

I lay there very VERY winded, struggling to breathe. Each breathe
hurt a lot. "Maybe this is what broken ribs feel like", I thought.
My left hand hurt too. After what seemed like ages, but was probably
less than 60 seconds, marshals and then medics arrived. Once my
helmet was off my breathing got a little easier, but anything more
than half a lungful hurt. Meanwhile the doctor had got my left glove
off and "reduced" (technical term) [2] my dislocated middle finger.
The pain level in my hand went down from 8/10 to 7/10.

They opened my leathers, cut my t-shirt open and checked for visible
damage to torso. Nothing to see, but breathing still laboured and
painful. Xrays required, so trip to hospital. I was loaded into the
ambulance and taken to the medical centre, for both doctors to check
me further. They called 999 to get me a "civilian" ambulance [3] for
the trip to Nobles Hospital.

By this time my breathing difficulties had eased, but the pain,
especially from my hand, had not, so I asked if I could have some
analgesia. They put a canula in and said I'd get "some morphine with
a paracetemol chaser." "I like this bar", I replied.

The morphine did its job, the pain faded, and now everything felt ok -
which is what morphine does. Off to hosipital, and the x-rays showed
no broken ribs, but several breaks in several fingers. They patched
me up with my fingers strapped together and sent me home.

The next day I woke up feeling much better than I had ant right to! A
couple of paracetemol and I was fine. I got a call from the fracture
clinic asking me to come in so they could sort my hand properly.
Turns out the break in the ring finger was displaced, so I got a local
anaesthetic injection, and they tugged on it and reset it. And then
plastered my whole hand, as apparently there was also a break in the
little finger too.

So there we have it - more proof that there's no fool like an old fool
:-)

[1] ok, ok, probably not as bad as when I put myself in intensive care
in 2008
[2] he just pulled it, and I felt it relocate
[3] If one of the ambulances supporting the race meeting had taken me
to hospital, which it would have done in a genuine emergency, racing
would have had to stop until it returned. As chairman of the club, I
obviously didn't want that, although equally obviously, it wasn't my
decision at all
--
Champ
neal at champ dot org dot uk

I don't know, but I been told
You never slow down, you never grow old

Champ <neal@champ.org.uk> wrote in
news:7gnjkgtvge77n9o91aohkh3giq95flq46f@4ax.com:

> In homage to Steve Packer's stupid self-inflected injury the other day
> (see thread "Fuck"), I thought I'd join in..
>
> Sunday was perhaps the worst [1] and certainly the most embarrassing
> day in my unremarkable racing career.
>
> Race 1, ZXR750 - did the warm-up lap, rolled onto my grid position,
> put my foot down.... and just toppled over! No idea how or why, just
> lost my balance. Picked the bike up, but it was flooded and wouldn't
> start, so pushed it off the grid and the race went off without me. No
> damage to bike, and none to me apart from pride
>

No, not laughing, honest.
> Race 2, TZ250 - on the third or fourth lap, the engine went
> buuurrrrhhh, with no acceleration, so I put my left hand up (to signal
> I was slowing to following riders) and pulled off the track. At that
> point, the engine seized, locking the rear wheel solid and bucking
> around violently such that I couldn't get my left hand back to the
> bars to pull the clutch in. I was spat off the bike and landed hard
> on my chest.
>

shouldn't 2 stroke riders adopt the French practice of cocking a leg so
as not to stop covering the clutch?

> I lay there very VERY winded, struggling to breathe. Each breathe
> hurt a lot. "Maybe this is what broken ribs feel like", I thought.
> My left hand hurt too. After what seemed like ages, but was probably
> less than 60 seconds, marshals and then medics arrived. Once my
> helmet was off my breathing got a little easier, but anything more
> than half a lungful hurt. Meanwhile the doctor had got my left glove
> off and "reduced" (technical term) [2] my dislocated middle finger.
> The pain level in my hand went down from 8/10 to 7/10.
>
> They opened my leathers, cut my t-shirt open and checked for visible
> damage to torso. Nothing to see, but breathing still laboured and
> painful. Xrays required, so trip to hospital. I was loaded into the
> ambulance and taken to the medical centre, for both doctors to check
> me further. They called 999 to get me a "civilian" ambulance [3] for
> the trip to Nobles Hospital.
>
> By this time my breathing difficulties had eased, but the pain,
> especially from my hand, had not, so I asked if I could have some
> analgesia. They put a canula in and said I'd get "some morphine with
> a paracetemol chaser." "I like this bar", I replied.
>
> The morphine did its job, the pain faded, and now everything felt ok -
> which is what morphine does. Off to hosipital, and the x-rays showed
> no broken ribs, but several breaks in several fingers. They patched
> me up with my fingers strapped together and sent me home.
>
> The next day I woke up feeling much better than I had ant right to! A
> couple of paracetemol and I was fine. I got a call from the fracture
> clinic asking me to come in so they could sort my hand properly.
> Turns out the break in the ring finger was displaced, so I got a local
> anaesthetic injection, and they tugged on it and reset it. And then
> plastered my whole hand, as apparently there was also a break in the
> little finger too.
>
> So there we have it - more proof that there's no fool like an old fool
>:-)
>

We already know you are a clumsy cunt. Re-certification is not
necessary.

> [1] ok, ok, probably not as bad as when I put myself in intensive care
> in 2008
> [2] he just pulled it, and I felt it relocate
> [3] If one of the ambulances supporting the race meeting had taken me
> to hospital, which it would have done in a genuine emergency, racing
> would have had to stop until it returned. As chairman of the club, I
> obviously didn't want that, although equally obviously, it wasn't my
> decision at all

Well, yes, they aren't going to stop a race if they can keep you quiet
with a bit of morphine

On Tuesday, September 21, 2021 at 3:22:41 PM UTC+1, Champ wrote:
> In homage to Steve Packer's stupid self-inflected injury the other day
> (see thread "Fuck"), I thought I'd join in..
>
> Sunday was perhaps the worst [1] and certainly the most embarrassing
> day in my unremarkable racing career.
> Schnippety Schnipp
> [1] ok, ok, probably not as bad as when I put myself in intensive care
> in 2008
> [2] he just pulled it, and I felt it relocate
> [3] If one of the ambulances supporting the race meeting had taken me
> to hospital, which it would have done in a genuine emergency, racing
> would have had to stop until it returned. As chairman of the club, I
> obviously didn't want that, although equally obviously, it wasn't my
> decision at all

S'funny, was just thinking about things to use a credit up I have with a sticker website.

This post prompted the idea of little fairing stickers with a picture of nobles with a circle and a line through it, along the lines of those they put on fighter planes for confirmed kills.....

On Tuesday, 21 September 2021 at 15:22:41 UTC+1, Champ wrote:
> In homage to Steve Packer's stupid self-inflected injury the other day
> (see thread "Fuck"), I thought I'd join in..
<snip>

Ouch and fuck indeed.

At least you've got a better story than 'slipped on a ladder and couldn't bring myself to drop my impact driver to save myself'.

GWS.

On 21/09/2021 15:22, Champ wrote:
> In homage to Steve Packer's stupid self-inflected injury the other day
> (see thread "Fuck"), I thought I'd join in..
>
> Sunday was perhaps the worst [1] and certainly the most embarrassing
> day in my unremarkable racing career.
>
> Race 1, ZXR750 - did the warm-up lap, rolled onto my grid position,
> put my foot down.... and just toppled over! No idea how or why, just
> lost my balance. Picked the bike up, but it was flooded and wouldn't
> start, so pushed it off the grid and the race went off without me. No
> damage to bike, and none to me apart from pride

Film, where is the film?
(He has had a bang on the head you know).

>
> Race 2, TZ250 - on the third or fourth lap, the engine went
> buuurrrrhhh, with no acceleration, so I put my left hand up (to signal
> I was slowing to following riders) and pulled off the track. At that
> point, the engine seized, locking the rear wheel solid and bucking
> around violently such that I couldn't get my left hand back to the
> bars to pull the clutch in. I was spat off the bike and landed hard
> on my chest.
<snip>

Owww.

--
Bruce Porter
"The internet is a huge and diverse community but mainly friendly"
https://the-ytc1-shed.blogspot.com/ Deprected(http://ytc1.blogspot.co.uk/)
There *is* an alternative! https://www.libreoffice.org/

On Tuesday, 21 September 2021 at 15:55:20 UTC+1, Stephen Packer wrote:
> On Tuesday, 21 September 2021 at 15:22:41 UTC+1, Champ wrote:
> > In homage to Steve Packer's stupid self-inflected injury the other day
> > (see thread "Fuck"), I thought I'd join in..
> <snip>
>
> Ouch and fuck indeed.
>
> At least you've got a better story than 'slipped on a ladder and couldn't bring myself to drop my impact driver to save myself'.
>
> GWS.

Bad form and all that...

But, WTF?
We know the ZXR's ok but what about the TZ?

You might say that it was a long post but by my reckoning it's missing at least one paragraph.

Stephen Packer <stephen.packer@gmail.com> wrote:
> On Tuesday, 21 September 2021 at 15:55:20 UTC+1, Stephen Packer wrote:
>> On Tuesday, 21 September 2021 at 15:22:41 UTC+1, Champ wrote:
>> > In homage to Steve Packer's stupid self-inflected injury the other day
>> > (see thread "Fuck"), I thought I'd join in..
>> <snip>
>>
>> Ouch and fuck indeed.
>>
>> At least you've got a better story than 'slipped on a ladder and couldn't bring myself to drop my impact driver to save myself'.
>>
>> GWS.
>
> Bad form and all that...
>
> But, WTF?
> We know the ZXR's ok but what about the TZ?
>
> You might say that it was a long post but by my reckoning it's missing at least one paragraph.

My thoughts as well.

GWS.

--
FJR1300A, GL1000, KLR650A6F, EX250J9A, DR200SE, Vespa Ciao

On 21/09/2021 15:22, Champ wrote:

<snip>

Yes, yes. But what about the 250, is it ok?

--
/Simon

On Tue, 21 Sep 2021 14:42:54 -0000 (UTC), wessie
<willnotwork@tesco.net> wrote:

>shouldn't 2 stroke riders adopt the French practice of cocking a leg so
>as not to stop covering the clutch?

I was thinking "use the other hand"

--

-Pip

On Tue, 21 Sep 2021 15:22:38 +0100, Champ <neal@champ.org.uk> wrote:

>Race 1, ZXR750 - did the warm-up lap, rolled onto my grid position,
>put my foot down.... and just toppled over! No idea how or why, just
>lost my balance. Picked the bike up, but it was flooded and wouldn't
>start, so pushed it off the grid and the race went off without me. No
>damage to bike, and none to me apart from pride

I feel so much better knowing that t's not just me who does bloody
stupid things.

>Race 2, TZ250 - on the third or fourth lap, the engine went
>buuurrrrhhh, with no acceleration, so I put my left hand up (to signal
>I was slowing to following riders) and pulled off the track. At that
>point, the engine seized, locking the rear wheel solid and bucking
>around violently such that I couldn't get my left hand back to the
>bars to pull the clutch in. I was spat off the bike and landed hard
>on my chest.

So... the bike? *You'll* recover.

--

-Pip

siwilson wrote:

> On 21/09/2021 15:22, Champ wrote:
>
> <snip>
>
> Yes, yes. But what about the 250, is it ok?

It's only a Yamaha[1]

[1] Yes, I know it's a TZ and therefore isn't "only a Yamaha" but never
let anything get in the way of paraphrasing a good meme.

--
Chris

Champ wrote:

[snip]

> So there we have it - more proof that there's no fool like an old fool
> :-)

Clumsy cunt. GWS.

--
Chris

On 21/09/2021 15:22, Champ wrote:
> In homage to Steve Packer's stupid self-inflected injury the other day
> (see thread "Fuck"), I thought I'd join in..
>
> Sunday was perhaps the worst [1] and certainly the most embarrassing
> day in my unremarkable racing career.
>
> Race 1, ZXR750 - did the warm-up lap, rolled onto my grid position,
> put my foot down.... and just toppled over! No idea how or why, just
> lost my balance. Picked the bike up, but it was flooded and wouldn't
> start, so pushed it off the grid and the race went off without me. No
> damage to bike, and none to me apart from pride
>
> Race 2, TZ250 - on the third or fourth lap, the engine went
> buuurrrrhhh, with no acceleration, so I put my left hand up (to signal
> I was slowing to following riders) and pulled off the track. At that
> point, the engine seized, locking the rear wheel solid and bucking
> around violently such that I couldn't get my left hand back to the
> bars to pull the clutch in. I was spat off the bike and landed hard
> on my chest.
>

So good to see a bike thread but my commiseration for your injuries,
take it easy and heal well.

BTW you're not an old fool, at least another 10 years before you leave
middle age behind.

On 21/09/2021 22:22 Champ penned these words:

> Sunday was perhaps the worst [1] and certainly the most embarrassing
> day in my unremarkable racing career.
>
> Race 1, ZXR750 - did the warm-up lap, rolled onto my grid position,
> put my foot down.... and just toppled over!

Ooops. I did that at some traffic lights a few months back, stalled and toppled
Mrs B was unimpressed.

>
> The morphine did its job, the pain faded, and now everything felt ok -
> which is what morphine does.
>
> The next day I woke up feeling much better than I had ant right to! A
> couple of paracetemol and I was fine. I got a call from the fracture
> clinic asking me to come in so they could sort my hand properly.
> Turns out the break in the ring finger was displaced, so I got a local
> anaesthetic injection, and they tugged on it and reset it. And then
> plastered my whole hand, as apparently there was also a break in the
> little finger too.
>
> So there we have it - more proof that there's no fool like an old fool
> :-)

Ah well you survived to tell the tale. GWS

--
Ian

"Man will never be free until the last king is strangled with the entrails of
the last priest"

On 21/09/2021 22:22, AJH wrote:
>
> BTW you're not an old fool, at least another 10 years before you leave
> middle age behind.

I dunno. Have you met Champ recently?

--
Eddie eddie@deguello.org

On 22/09/2021 09:05, Eddie wrote:
> On 21/09/2021 22:22, AJH wrote:
>>
>> BTW you're not an old fool, at least another 10 years before you leave
>> middle age behind.
>
> I dunno. Have you met Champ recently?
>

I never have but being over a decade older I'm not conceding yet.

On Tue, 21 Sep 2021 21:16:39 +0100, Pipl <pluscher@live.co.uk> wrote:

>On Tue, 21 Sep 2021 14:42:54 -0000 (UTC), wessie
><willnotwork@tesco.net> wrote:
>
>>shouldn't 2 stroke riders adopt the French practice of cocking a leg so
>>as not to stop covering the clutch?

>I was thinking "use the other hand"

Yes - a much more experienced (with 2 strokes) racer explained to me
last night that you pull the clutch in and raise your *right* hand
--
Champ
neal at champ dot org dot uk

I don't know, but I been told
You never slow down, you never grow old

On Tue, 21 Sep 2021 08:43:37 -0700 (PDT), Stephen Packer
<stephen.packer@gmail.com> wrote:

>But, WTF?
>We know the ZXR's ok but what about the TZ?
>
>You might say that it was a long post but by my reckoning it's missing at least one paragraph.

Good point. Perhaps the definition of "grown up" for a biker is that
you actually think more about yourself than the bike after an off

Anyway, the bike isn't bad - needs fairing and seat unit, right hand
rearset, and maybe a lever
--
Champ
neal at champ dot org dot uk

I don't know, but I been told
You never slow down, you never grow old

On Wed, 22 Sep 2021 09:05:20 +0100, Eddie <eddie@deguello.org> wrote:

>On 21/09/2021 22:22, AJH wrote:
>>
>> BTW you're not an old fool, at least another 10 years before you leave
>> middle age behind.

>I dunno. Have you met Champ recently?

<flicks Vs>
--
Champ
neal at champ dot org dot uk

I don't know, but I been told
You never slow down, you never grow old

Champ wrote:

> put my foot down.... and just toppled over!

Middle of Hyde Park corner in morning rush hour. Not popular.

On 22/09/2021 11:33, Champ wrote:
> On Tue, 21 Sep 2021 08:43:37 -0700 (PDT), Stephen Packer
> <stephen.packer@gmail.com> wrote:
>
>> But, WTF?
>> We know the ZXR's ok but what about the TZ?
>>
>> You might say that it was a long post but by my reckoning it's missing at least one paragraph.
>
> Good point. Perhaps the definition of "grown up" for a biker is that
> you actually think more about yourself than the bike after an off
>
> Anyway, the bike isn't bad - needs fairing and seat unit, right hand
> rearset, and maybe a lever
>

And a barrel/hone/rebore/replate/piston etc. presumably?

--
/Simon

On Wed, 22 Sep 2021 11:33:24 +0100, Champ <neal@champ.org.uk> wrote:

>On Tue, 21 Sep 2021 08:43:37 -0700 (PDT), Stephen Packer
><stephen.packer@gmail.com> wrote:
>
>>But, WTF?
>>We know the ZXR's ok but what about the TZ?
>>
>>You might say that it was a long post but by my reckoning it's missing at least one paragraph.
>
>Good point. Perhaps the definition of "grown up" for a biker is that
>you actually think more about yourself than the bike after an off

When I saw people asking about it I realised that I hadn't even
considered it. I guess I 'grew up' quite a while back.
>
>Anyway, the bike isn't bad - needs fairing and seat unit, right hand
>rearset, and maybe a lever

And an engine rebuild, presumably, although I realise that that's
normally considered routine maintenance on stroker racebikes of that
era.

--
Ace
http://www.chaletbeauroc.com/

On 22/09/2021 11:34, Champ wrote:
> On Wed, 22 Sep 2021 09:05:20 +0100, Eddie <eddie@deguello.org> wrote:
>
>> On 21/09/2021 22:22, AJH wrote:
>>>
>>> BTW you're not an old fool, at least another 10 years before you leave
>>> middle age behind.
>
>> I dunno. Have you met Champ recently?
>
> <flicks Vs>

Are you sure you should be doing that, in your condition?

--
Eddie eddie@deguello.org

On 22/09/2021 10:32, AJH wrote:
> On 22/09/2021 09:05, Eddie wrote:
>> On 21/09/2021 22:22, AJH wrote:
>>>
>>> BTW you're not an old fool, at least another 10 years before you
>>> leave middle age behind.
>>
>> I dunno. Have you met Champ recently?
>
> I never have but being over a decade older I'm not conceding yet.

I'm a decade or so younger, but I'm sure I'm still somewhere around late
twenties, early thirties, so you might have a point.

--
Eddie eddie@deguello.org

On Tuesday, September 21, 2021 at 3:22:41 PM UTC+1, Champ wrote:
<A tale of fuckwittery>

GWS, YCC.

--
WUN